How do i fulfill my need to be Special, The Main Character

[SageModeAustin]

this is the core of my jealousy. its a need i want on a fundamental level, but i don't know if this is fulfillable. i also dont know if i can transcend this because its such a  deep core need/want of mine ever since i was a child i remember wanting to be famous and really good at something. i notice it affecting my relationship in subtle ways. 

Edit: the answer it to be self-less. All of the MC's in any game, story, book, movie share this quality

Edited June 20, 2021 by SageModeAustin

[thisintegrated]

Continue on your path on the spiral.  That's it.

[VeganAwake]

The sense of self never reaches fulfillment, that's its game.

It can be recognized it isn't real though.

 

 

Edited June 20, 2021 by VeganAwake

[Bluff]

8 hours ago, SageModeAustin said:

its a need i want on a fundamental level, but i don't know if this is fulfillable

Isn't it already fulfilled? Don't you have an experience that only you have and no other point of view has the same experience? Isn't your experience unique and special? 

[Superfluo]

@SageModeAustin That desire can have two sides. A narcisistic one, and an authentic one. Maybe it's your authentic self to pursue fame and excellence, or maybe not. You have to discern that for yourself, through introspection, healing, and questioning yourself.

Being self-less when you're not authentic in doing so, is not self-less, because you're just using a facade to convince yourself that you are something you're not. In doing so you have an agenda.

Obviously, if you feel inclined to be self-less for some motives, that desire also has a narcisistic side and an authentic side, so again, you have to discern that for yourself. So there's value in being self-less even when you're not fully authentic in doing so.

Edited June 20, 2021 by Superfluo

[SageModeAustin]

@Superfluo i came to the conclusion that you need to be self-less to be the MC. Think about it. Being self-less has the most resistance. As opposed to fulfilling egoic desires needs and wants living in that bubble. The path with the most resistance is the path few will take. If you look at any other main character in any movie or story they are ultimately self-less. They want to help others on an authentic level. As for the side characters are selfish and live in their own bubble of the ego. Yes you're right you can't be self-less if your not authentically self-less. But it can be achieved. By raising you self-less-ness by 1 degree it is tangible and decreases chances of ego backlash

[VeganAwake]

46 minutes ago, SageModeAustin said:

@Superfluo i came to the conclusion that you need to be self-less to be the MC. Think about it. Being self-less has the most resistance. As opposed to fulfilling egoic desires needs and wants living in that bubble. The path with the most resistance is the path few will take. If you look at any other main character in any movie or story they are ultimately self-less. They want to help others on an authentic level. As for the side characters are selfish and live in their own bubble of the ego. Yes you're right you can't be self-less if your not authentically self-less. But it can be achieved. By raising you self-less-ness by 1 degree it is tangible and decreases chances of ego backlash

Being selfless is just another attempt of the spiritual ego to try to put itself in a better position in a more sneakier or subtle way.

On the surface level the action will appear as selflessness but deep down it's just the ego attempting to fulfil its endless requirements of needing to feel special.

Liberation has nothing to do with being a better person.

❤

 

[WelcometoReality]

20 hours ago, SageModeAustin said:

this is the core of my jealousy. its a need i want on a fundamental level, but i don't know if this is fulfillable. i also dont know if i can transcend this because its such a  deep core need/want of mine ever since i was a child i remember wanting to be famous and really good at something. i notice it affecting my relationship in subtle ways. 

Edit: the answer it to be self-less. All of the MC's in any game, story, book, movie share this quality

How are you going to become self-less?

[Breakingthewall]

you are the totality of existence, embodied in a kind of enigmatic magic game. special enough imo

[snowyowl]

Have you been deeply in love? You can be that special, main character to your partner, your parents, your children, even your pets (i don't know which stage of life you're at). Be the best child, parent, partner you can be, that's pretty special. 

[Superfluo]

@SageModeAustin Stop looking to others. What YOU want to do? Who YOU want to be?

[Lilia]

In Matt Kahn's words: Love the one who wants to be special!

Could it be the case that the one who wants to be special needs more love, not less?

Edit: Even more importantly, love the one who does NOT feel special. It is Your love, God's love that this apparent one is craving.

Edited June 21, 2021 by Lilia
Afterthought

[Nahm]

What else has the property of being aware? The tree? The bird? Nahm? The sky? Of course not! Only awareness is aware!

[SageModeAustin]

@VeganAwake thats only true if its inauthentic self-less-ness. Someone who is woke and awake of the profound suffering of this world will naturally be self-less because when u realize this it becomes obvious it is the most meaningful and noble thing to do

[SageModeAustin]

@snowyowl i like this. this is what im talking about here. i am currently in a relationship and find myself feeling more special to them as it gets deeper. also can u send me ur pfp? i really like it

[SageModeAustin]

@Liliaself-less doesn't mean not loving yourself. theres a quote that explains this well. "think lightly of yourself and deeply of the world" i believe its by miyato musashi but it points to what im getting at 

@WelcometoReality by asking myself how can i be self-less right now? throughout the day you'll find your brain finding ways in which u are selfish, and it auto-corrects 

[WelcometoReality]

@SageModeAustin It sounds to me like a self that is trying to act selfless. But maybe it works. Isn't there a path in which you devout yourself to being of service to the world completely and in doing that all selfishness falls away?

[vladorion]

On 6/20/2021 at 4:50 AM, SageModeAustin said:

this is the core of my jealousy. its a need i want on a fundamental level, but i don't know if this is fulfillable. i also dont know if i can transcend this because its such a  deep core need/want of mine ever since i was a child i remember wanting to be famous and really good at something. i notice it affecting my relationship in subtle ways. 

Edit: the answer it to be self-less. All of the MC's in any game, story, book, movie share this quality

Would you want to be special if you knew with a 100% certainty that it is not going to give you love, attention, acknowledgement? 

You want to be special because you believe you need to be special to get those things.

Specialness by itself doesn't mean anything.

Now, the image of you that wants to get those things lives in your imagination, so you can give him all he wants in your imagination as well, until he is satisfied.

[Nahm]

There’s “letting it go” and there’s really Letting It Go / can’t even remember what it was, takes a minute to come to mind, a certain reloading of it into / as the now is experienced.  Once you got that jealousy from others… let the comparative thinking go…it served it’s purpose & was heard / felt… now you know what you want… move up the scale to passion and do / live it.  If it’s to be famous, be famous. If it’s to be really good at something, be really good at something. But do so for you so to speak, just for the direct experience of it, because you love it that much, because it lights you up, illuminates you, sets you on fire. Not for your thoughts about how you’re seen or thought of. That’d be ruminating unproductive busy work of the mind.

Allow what everyone else is doing to be a great well of jealousy… appreciation that they are doing it, resulting in inspiration & passion brought to direct experience. You can pair this with selflessness along the way, and or go full selfish too… all roads lead to unity and servitude, and you don’t even need to know that along the way. 

[SageModeAustin]

@Nahm can you elaborate on this? I'm not sure if I fully understood it. it sounds like you are saying use my jealousy to fuel my desire to be the character I want to be? 

21 hours ago, Nahm said:

Allow what everyone else is doing to be a great well of jealousy… appreciation that they are doing it, resulting in inspiration & passion brought to direct experience. You can pair this with selflessness along the way, and or go full selfish too… all roads lead to unity and servitude, and you don’t even need to know that along the way.