All Day I Dream About Sex

[ivankiss]

@knakoo I don't really stop flirting and/or approaching (unless I'm in a relationship). I'm still open for anything to happen. I just don't actively seek for another partner if I already have one. I'm not that driven. It was kinda the default setting for me..

What do you think? Why is that?

Could be just plain laziness. Or maybe some negative beliefs I hold..

Btw, I'm mostly focused on tinder these days. Got about 250 matches. Lots of options. For a small city like this; that's a lot. I have a few dates set; but I'm not being too aggressive about it. I'm kinda holding back. Taking my time. I don't want to put pussy above self-improvement.

Besides tinder; there's my job. Plenty of opportunities to meet ridiculously hot girls.

To be honest; I never really put too much effort into scoring. It always just kinda happened on its own. And it was awesome.

This is the first time I'm trying to take full control over things. In that sense; I'm kind of a newbie.

[Shin]

1 minute ago, ivankiss said:

Got about 250 matches. Lots of options.

Besides tinder; there's my job. Plenty of opportunities to meet ridiculously hot girls.

To be honest; I never really put too much effort into scoring. It always just kinda happened on its own.

I'm kind of a newbie.

Incels of Actualized.org,

Activated

[ivankiss]

@Shin

Honest question; do you think I'm interfering too much? 

(With the natural flow of things - I mean)

Edited June 17, 2021 by ivankiss

[Shin]

6 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

@Shin

Honest question; do you think I'm interfering too much? 

(With the natural flow of things - I mean)

I don't think so, it's more you interfering with what you need.

[ivankiss]

@Shin ?

[Shin]

19 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

@Shin ?

That's basically what you said though, I just noticed.

It's been 34 degree for 4 days now, so shhhh

[ivankiss]

@Shin make that 4 degrees warmer: https://youtu.be/8NGemR1cqZQ

 

[Roy]

You're aware of it, that's half the battle. Just be mindful of it right now and don't let the urges cause you to do anything reckless or regretful.

It will pass.

[puporing]

Making music has helped me in that ... expressing myself more authentically and fully. It hasn't completely taken away the frustrations but it helped a lot! I also just embraced it (opened up my relationship like 4 years ago), it was hard because of cultural conditioning at large, but I'm at the stage now where it's like.. gotta embrace who I am, and that includes sexuality. I think just being able to express that one way or another (ie reduce repression) has helped me a long way. 

I recommend the "Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch", it validated a lot of my feelings and confusions around my sexuality. Hope that helps. 

Edited June 18, 2021 by puporing

[ivankiss]

@Roy Hear ya, thanks. Feeling a bit relieved. It's not that bad now. I think the urges are the strongest the day after I have sex. It's almost like once I taste the drug; I want it all the time. But if I don't get it; I kinda start forgetting about it...

@puporing Thanks! Might look into that.

Regarding music; heck yeah. Music is - in a sense - a way bigger orgasm to me. A way bigger source of love, pleasure, freedom, etc. But it work in different ways. It's not exactly the same as sticking your penis into a vagina. I want to meet those needs too. And I also noticed in the past that I'm more inspired to create music if I'm meeting those needs consistently. 

[cjoseph90]

what are you currently doing to transend your urges? hows your journey going? out of curiosity where are you from? 

[ivankiss]

@cjoseph90 Right now? Nothing. Sitting in silence. Hanging out here.

In general? Nothing. Sitting in silence.

My journey is going very well, thanks. Things kinda escalated today with a girl I met at my workplace. Feeling good about it.

Life is awesome in all other areas, too. I'm aligned with my purpose and seeing steady progress.

I'm from Subotica, Serbia. Currently living in Maribor, Slovenia. How about you?

[universe]

You don't need to have sex 1-2 times a day.

You are already enough.

See what you are identified with and what you want to be identified with.

[ivankiss]

@universe Hmm, yeah, I see what you mean. 

But this seems relevant now. 

Thanks.

[puporing]

4 hours ago, ivankiss said:

Regarding music; heck yeah. Music is - in a sense - a way bigger orgasm to me. A way bigger source of love, pleasure, freedom, etc. But it work in different ways. It's not exactly the same as sticking your penis into a vagina. I want to meet those needs too. And I also noticed in the past that I'm more inspired to create music if I'm meeting those needs consistently. 

I totally understand that and feel the same (and about music ), not having your needs met can be very distracting to pursue life purpose goals... I think we live in a hyper sexually repressed society honestly.. not sure about where you live but where I live it's still pretty conservative. The more repressed people are the more intense these feelings can become I find.. 

Not sure if this applies to you... I became conscious of the fact that my needs around sex is a combination of soothing emotional pain and finding god.

Edited June 20, 2021 by puporing

[Eternal Unity]

@cjoseph90 An urge is a sign from the body. Whether to satisfy an urge or transcend it, is a choice I make at the moment it appears.

If I want to transcend it, I breathe deeply and let it flush my system, so to speak, until it passes. I notice my thoughts and say: "huh, interesting". The aftermath experience is proportional to my amount of transcendence. If it was hard, the experience is blissful. If I didn't put that much energy, the experience is more subtle.

My journey is progressing on all levels and on multiple dimensions of my being. Up's and down's like everybody but taming the ox

I am from Herzliya, Israel.

Greg

[ivankiss]

@puporing @Eternal Unity Nice. Thank you both.

Here's a lil update;

I took some of your advices here and started searching for more fwb's. I'm at 3 now. Things are looking good. The urges are not that strong nowadays. And I'm having an epic time whenever I hang out with these 3 girls.

I doubt I'll be going too crazy about it... But one or two more girls can't hurt  

Thanks all for your thoughts! Very helpful.

[Applegarden8]

Nothing but respect with your decision, as it is your life. However I wanted to challenge the paradigm a bit, if I may. Now is all that a long term solution for "irresistible" urge of sexual desire?

[WelcometoReality]

@ivankiss You can't control what you desire but you can control how that energy is expressed/manifests. 

I did go through something similiar post-awakening where there were alot of thoughts about sex and expression. I think it's a natural part that just needs to be gone through. Now not as much but still come up from time to time.

[cjoseph90]

@ivankiss 

hehe happy to hear that with your fwb situation, quite  an intresting post. As a Female I myself try to direct my energy in other ways whenever an urge arises, but as @WelcometoReality  said 'You cant control what you desire, but you can control how that energy is expressed' - You cannot control control your thoughts, they're not here to be controlled. It is what it is.

Im from london but currently living in Barcelona