One of the most important thing to understand about women

[Harlen Kelly]

5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Of course I take the brutal stuff into consideration. But I'm not going to give women the leverage simply because of that. 

In a particular case, if a woman is wrong then she is wrong. 

In another case, if a man is wrong then he is wrong 

The issue is that this is not a balanced take at all, did you know that approximately 80% of rapes go unpunished? I mean brutal rapes, not misunderstandings or confusions. 

Due diligence has to to be done to determine the veracity of a rape accusation, but it also has to be taken into account the sheer amount of women who get brutally raped and never get justice, which is the majority unfortunately.

Edited June 15, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[Preety_India]

Just now, Harlen Kelly said:

The issue is that this is not a balanced take at all, did you know that approximately 80% of rapes go unpunished? I mean brutal rapes, not misunderstandings or confusions. 

Due diligence has to to be done to determine the veracity of rape accusation, but it also has to be taken into account the sheer amount of women who get brutally raped and never get justice, which is the majority unfortunately.

I was talking about consent when it comes to matters of kissing and consensual sex. I wasn't talking about rape. 

I know it's hard to determine whether it was consensual sex or rape and one has to believe the victim 's statements in such case. 

But there is always that possibility that it wasn't rape but consensual sex and it was turned around to look like rape. This possibility cannot be negated. 

I know that a lot of rapists go scott free because of lack of evidence or lack of belief. 

But this can easily become a trap for innocent men who never raped but were framed to look like a rapist. 

It's just complicated. 

But my reference was more to situations where clearly a woman is making the man simp for her, playing him along and the dude is not reading anything wrong yet he is vilified as an asshole even if he wasn't acting like one. 

I wasn't talking about rape because that's a serious problem that needs due diligence. 

 

[mivafofa]

11 minutes ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Are you just going to care about your pleasure as a woman? If you are able to tune in to his desires before yours is a good way to make a man feel wanted. How else do you think a man would want to have sex with you?

Your perspective is highly biased towards women, which is understandable. 

I can't believe I have to state the obvious*, but male sexuality and female sexuality doesn't work the same way....... 

Edited June 15, 2021 by mivafofa

[Harlen Kelly]

6 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

But there is always that possibility that it wasn't rape but consensual sex and it was turned around to look like rape. This possibility cannot be negated. 

I know that a lot of rapists go scott free because of lack of evidence or lack of belief. 

But this can easily become a trap for innocent men who never raped but were framed to look like a rapist. 

It's just complicated. 

I perfectly understand what you are trying to convey but those cases are the minority. 

If you study the statistics you will soon realize that the real issue is rapes going unpunished and not women making false allegations. 

There are women who falsely accuse men of rape but statistically and factually speaking, those are the exceptions. Focusing on those cases to delegitimize the veracity of an accusation is doing a disservice to real victims of rape and it's not based on facts or statistical studies. 

Edited June 15, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[Preety_India]

Just now, Harlen Kelly said:

Focusing on those cases to delegitimize the veracity of an accusation is doing a disservice to real victims of rape and it's baseless thinking. 

I'm not delegitimizing the veracity of true accusations. 

I'm only saying that such things are complicated and innocent men can get trapped in all this 

Even if the trapped men are a minority, their innocence shouldn't be dismissed or ignored. 

Although I don't know what the solution for such a thing is, because no system ever delivers perfect solutions. 

 

[Harlen Kelly]

Just now, Preety_India said:

I'm only saying that such things are complicated and innocent men can get trapped in all this 

Even if the trapped men are a minority, their innocence shouldn't be dismissed or ignored. 

Quick question, why do you exhibit more compassion for the statistical minority of men who get falsely accused than for the statistical majority of women whose brutal rape goes unpunished?

Don't you think that's flawed thinking?

[Shin]

8 minutes ago, mivafofa said:

I can't believe I have to state the obvious*, but male sexuality and female sexuality doesn't work the same way....... 

You are explaining the side of one coin (the other side is Harley's explanation).

Both of you think the other person is trying to say the other side of the coin doesn't exist.

Pretty sure you'd sit and talk face to face you'd agree about this.

 

[Harlen Kelly]

@mivafofa I know, I was trying to highlight that your perspective is highly biased towards women. My response was mimicking yours. 

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Quick question, why do you exhibit more compassion for the statistical minority of men who get falsely accused than for the statistical majority of women whose brutal rape goes unpunished?

Don't you think that's flawed thinking?

I think in exhibiting empathy for the majority, sometimes we lose sight of the minority? That's why maybe? 

 

[Harlen Kelly]

@Preety_India Of course, we are not going to brush away the false allegations and how detrimental they can be, but the real issue statistically speaking is women getting brutally raped. We shouldn't lose sight of this fact. 

Focusing on the statistical minority as opposed to the statistical majority would create more suffering.

[Harlen Kelly]

 

39 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

It's not a question of gender. It's a question of being loving to your partner. This is better done when you're not being a selfish ass just interested in taking. 

Sex if done consciously is also applied spirituality and an art of love.

Ideally, both partner take pleasure from giving to one another. It anyway result in all needs being covered. 

I agree, that's the point I was trying to make. 

Not men prioritizing the needs of a woman over his own as @mivafofa suggested, or the other way around, but both working cooperatively and synergistically. 

[mivafofa]

Quote

@mivafofa I know, I was trying to highlight that your perspective is highly biased towards women. My response was mimicking yours.

@Harlen Kelly  Sigh... Again can't believe I have to explain this, but mimicking is invalid here. We're not comparing men with men. We're literally sexual polar opposite. Obviously speaking in general terms - A man doesn't need to "feel safe" to be able to "surrender his body" to a woman in order to be turned on.   I mean even if a woman tried to assault you, most of the time you could just push her away in a laugh.  It can't be done the other way around.  What is men's sexually need? A good fuck or a hot woman.  What is women's sexual need? A fucking list is what you get! ?  It's just not the same. It's much harder to please a woman and turn her on. The man who's chasing is usually already turned on and ready like a microwave.  What is left to do then is to tuned in to her desire and needs in order to turn her on in return.  How do you do that? You emotionally satisfy her, let go of your own desire momentarily to fully tune in to hers.  When a man can do that, it proves to the woman that you care, and that she can trust you with her body, because she knows you're perceptive enough to stop at the any cue if she doesn't want anymore, no matter how strong is your desire.  

... Please tell me you understand this difference.. 

 

Edit: Iike I'm not even saying that just for the sake of women, it also goes for men's sake.  If you wanna get laid without raping or coercing a woman into it, that's how you go, I'm giving you pointers here!

Edited June 15, 2021 by mivafofa

[Harlen Kelly]

@mivafofa Read my response to your message again. 

My point was that you should be as interested in pleasing your man as the man should be interested in pleasing you. 

If you don't agree with that statement, you are biased towards women, which is totally understandable but does not necessarily lead to an interdependent relationship or holistic understanding. 

[hyruga]

Lame video by Teal. Who doesn't know that you need trust and alignment?

Edited June 16, 2021 by hyruga

[mivafofa]

@Harlen Kelly A woman is naturally inclined to nurture and please her man the moment she fell in love with him. It was so obvious I didn't think I needed to validate this fact for you.  When my man did all the right moves to attract me and I fell in love, I spent hours restudying online the male's genitelia all over again - how to give the best bj, and different bed techniques to please him. I learned countless cooking and baking recipes just to please him outside bed too. I'm constantly on alert to bring new kinds of surprises in his life, in gifts, trainings or activities. 

 

I just find it funny though that it's like Here's a thread to understand women better! Women, you're encouraged to share your experience. 

Woman:  *Shares her experience*

Man: You're bias. try to understand men.

? oh ok

[Harlen Kelly]

9 minutes ago, mivafofa said:

I spent hours restudying online the male's genitelia all over again - how to give the best bj, and different bed techniques to please him.

You are definitely a keeper. Good girl!

*I am teasing.

Edited June 16, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[Shin]

17 minutes ago, mivafofa said:

@Harlen Kelly A woman is naturally inclined to nurture and please her man the moment she fell in love with him. It was so obvious I didn't think I needed to validate this fact for you.  When my man did all the right moves to attract me and I fell in love, I spent hours restudying online the male's genitelia all over again - how to give the best bj, and different bed techniques to please him. I learned countless cooking and baking recipes just to please him outside bed too. I'm constantly on alert to bring new kinds of surprises in his life, in gifts, trainings or activities. 

 

I just find it funny though that it's like Here's a thread to understand women better! Women, you're encouraged to share your experience. 

Woman:  *Shares her experience*

Man: You're bias. try to understand men.

? oh ok

It's also about understanding men better, there is no bias towards one side ?

Now let's keep the blame and assumptions on the side, those are generally getting in the way of understanding (not talking about anyone in particular) ?

[soos_mite_ah]

6 hours ago, Peter Miklis said:

Yes before what? Before a kiss? And how many times should a guy ask for consent? Is it just a one time thing, or is it "ok, can I touch your boobs now?"

This shit truly fascinates me? on one hand, you are told to always ask for consent, on the other hand you are shamed for being a pussy if you do so. I guess you just can't win, can you? Lol

Shaming a man for being a pussy for asking for consent just shows me that the person doing the shaming has no idea about the female experience or how women work in general. 

Asking someone "what do you want me to do to you" or "do you want me to do ____" is asking for consent but it can also be sexy.  

Also asking makes a woman more safer and feel like she can do more things with you. Even if she says no, she will still have a sense of respect for you because you respect her. 

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

@Shin you have to realize that some women are not really interested in a guy but still play along and lead him on. 

That kind of behavior can confuse men. 

Tbh that is unfair behavior coming from some types of women 

I mean even then consent is on going. Even if she "led him on" or "changed her mind" no is still no. "Leading him on" is often used as an excuse for men to not pay attention to what a woman actually wants. There are women out there who get told that they "led him on" based on what she was wearing even if she didn't even interact with the guy before hand. 

3 hours ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Why should a man prioritize the need of a woman? What if the opposite was stated, a woman should prioritize the need of a man, how does that sound?

That's very inequitable thinking.

A need to feel safe and respected isn't the same as the desire to feel properly pleasured. Both are important don't get me wrong, but a baseline foundation of safety is much more important for both genders, but especially women because of the things that can happen to us and the things we worry about. 

[soos_mite_ah]

7 hours ago, mivafofa said:

Funny you'd confirm it right after I mention how most men are not aware of what's rape.  Don't take it wrong, we're all learning here but that last sentence reminded me of what one of my female friend shared with me. 

 

6 hours ago, Etherial Cat said:

Very much so. I get the chills when I hear men talking of hard close, because if I think about it, a lot of rapist will perceive their action as being a hard close and not a crossing the line action.

I'm so glad y'all brought this up. The whole hard close thing freaks me out as well. It's a recipe for disaster. 

[Harlen Kelly]

23 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Shaming a man for being a pussy for asking for consent just shows me that the person doing the shaming has no idea about the female experience or how women work in general. 

Asking someone "what do you want me to do to you" or "do you want me to do ____" is asking for consent but it can also be sexy.  

In the real world, not in a fantasy, not taking the lead and not being assertive is a turn off for women.