One of the most important thing to understand about women

[integral]

Ok guys, I've been subbed to emerald channel for years, watched most of her videos, she's a god dam Rockstar. So if she's telling me I'm wrong its probably true. Ill just spend a week or so thinking about this.  

Edited June 26, 2021 by integral

[integral]

@Lucas-fgm https://www.youtube.com/c/TheDiamondNet/featured

[Preety_India]

3 hours ago, integral said:

@Preety_India What are the systemic effect?  

Yes I agree that educating women about potential dangers can help them be more serious and careful and avoid potential situations and be vigilant.

But realize this what I'm saying next and think very carefully about it.

I'm born in a stage Blue culture.

I'm regularly bombarded with messages from mothers and girls like "don't be close to boys" and "don't be friends with men"and "don't be alone around men "

This has created a strong environment of fear around men to the point where men just can't date women 

Any behaviour from a man, even if it is with good intentions is misconstrued as bad.

It creates alienation between gender like a cold war between the gender.

In India it is very difficult to date a woman , even befriend her, Because she will look at every guy suspiciously, you can never invite her over a drink , the women act reserved and develop some sort of an aversion to men out of fear..

Everything a man does is looked at suspiciously, obviously because every girl is trained by her mother to avoid a man as much as possible.

The only man she will know is her husband who is decided by her parents.

You can't even meet a girl on an indian dating website.

Do you want to create such a wall between gender in western countries ?

Do you want women to constantly fear men ?

Fearing men in my country has definitely reduced sexual assaults in my country because I never go out with a man, I'm very reserved around men in real life. I only talk to them but I'm hardly ever in their presence.

This creates a culture that screams "men are predators" and "live in fear of men or get sexually assaulted "

Do you want this culture?

Do you want all men to be tainted by the predatory actions of a few men ??

There are so many good men.

Why should they suffer ? They want to adore and respect women and they can't do that because no woman can trust them..

This kind of culture destroys gender relations completely. Leaving both men and women very dissatisfied.

 

In my culture, women are shamed and blamed if they are raped..it's her fault that she is trusted that guy. The guy never learns the consequences of his behaviour and the girl forever avoids men 

All girls get the message "avoid men" 

It achieves low crime rate but at a huge cost to normal relationships in society 

If you lived in a stage Blue culture, where no woman wants to have a drink with you, you would feel very strange and isolated and outcast as a man.

You would even start thinking that you are like a predator when you don't harbour those instincts.. you're automatically supposed to assume that you have beastly instincts even if you are innocent.

I don't think you want that ?

 

Edited June 26, 2021 by Preety_India

[Etherial Cat]

Hey, you people

I wrote a long post as per answering your diverse points and tags but the computer I m currently using got out of battery and my writings weren't saved.

And I have decided not to re-write it due to how frustrating it is. So please excuse me if I don't reply your latest answer. I had the intention to do so but I don't have the courage to start again.

3 hours ago, integral said:

Ok guys, I've been subbed to emerald channel for years, watched most of her videos, she's a god dam Rockstar. So if she's telling me I'm wrong its probably true. Ill just spend a week or so thinking about this.  

That's really a cool twist. Kudos to you, really.

--

I got a story for you all. Guess what happened to me today?

I got "assaulted". 

This time it was the middle of the day, in a busy street in the city I am currently living. As I was walking with my boyfriend and two of his friends on the side way, a man was coming my way from the other direction. I noticed he had both his hands in his pant, and was touching his junk. I thought it was odd.

When he finally came at my height, he removed his hands from his pants, and he grabbed my left arm with it.

I immediately started shouting out of disgust and anger, called him a pervert and described his action loudly so everyone could hear what happened.

My boyfriend and his two friends were in disbelief that someone would do that to a woman walking with 3 men by her side in front of a crowd of witnesses.

Notice how none of the advices given here could prevent me from remaining safe from this type of undesirable interaction.

I wasn't interested in making a scene and urged us to walk away as I got afraid that the guys would want to fight the man who just joined his group of friend a few meters away. So that's pretty much it.

I haven't been particularly shook by the event, even though I'm pissed that I have been made felt unsafe in plain day and in plain sight... I think I'm kinda getting used to the fact that this type of stuff happens, unfortunately. 

Edited June 26, 2021 by Etherial Cat

[RendHeaven]

2 hours ago, integral said:

Ok guys, I've been subbed to emerald channel for years, watched most of her videos, she's a god dam Rockstar. So if she's telling me I'm wrong its probably true. Ill just spend a week or so thinking about this.  

Woah.

That's really cool

[Peter Miklis]

7 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

I noticed he had both his hands in his pant, and was touching his junk. I thought it was odd.

You mean his hands were directly on the junk, or that he had his hands in the pockets and was touching his junk throught them? Either way, what a weirdo lol. A lot of twisted, perverted MFs out there.

[Etherial Cat]

Just now, Peter Miklis said:

You mean his hands were directly on the junk, or that he had his hands in the pockets and was touching his junk throught them? Either way, what a weirdo lol. A lot of twisted, perverted MFs out there.

Na. He was walking the two hands inside his pants. That's what caught my attention in the first place. I was wondering "why would anyone do that?". But at this point he was already 2 meters close. I thought seriously he was planning to get his dick out and flash me 2 seconds after I noticed what he was doing.

Instead of being flashed, he got them out and touched me with it (?...).  Anyway. 

I'm glad it was just an arm grab at the end of the day, but I still had to walk 5-10 minutes with my arm soiled with a random strangers junk germs. ?

 

[knakoo]

2 hours ago, Etherial Cat said:

Hey, you people

I wrote a long post as per answering your diverse points and tags but the computer I m currently using got out of battery and my writings weren't saved.

And I have decided not to re-write it due to how frustrating it is. So please excuse me if I don't reply your latest answer. I had the intention to do so but I don't have the courage to start again.

That's really a cool twist. Kudos to you, really.

--

I got a story for you all. Guess what happened to me today?

I got "assaulted". 

This time it was the middle of the day, in a busy street in the city I am currently living. As I was walking with my boyfriend and two of his friends on the side way, a man was coming my way from the other direction. I noticed he had both his hands in his pant, and was touching his junk. I thought it was odd.

When he finally came at my height, he removed his hands from his pants, and he grabbed my left arm with it.

I immediately started shouting out of disgust and anger, called him a pervert and described his action loudly so everyone could hear what happened.

My boyfriend and his two friends were in disbelief that someone would do that to a woman walking with 3 men by her side in front of a crowd of witnesses.

Notice how none of the advices given here could prevent me from remaining safe from this type of undesirable interaction.

I wasn't interested in making a scene and urged us to walk away as I got afraid that the guys would want to fight the man who just joined his group of friend a few meters away. So that's pretty much it.

I haven't been particularly shook by the event, even though I'm pissed that I have been made felt unsafe in plain day and in plain sight... I think I'm kinda getting used to the fact that this type of stuff happens, unfortunately. 

Is this kind of stuff really common for you ? Like every week ? For women in general ? Are you 1 out of a 1000 attractive to make men so crazy and gross ? 

Edited June 26, 2021 by knakoo

[knakoo]

If anyone wants to learn more about the perspective of a sexually abused woman and the trauma it creates, I highly recommend this podcast episode. The woman telling her story is so vulnerable, it's beautiful and very touching. I felt so much love for her listening to it.

Plus the girls hosting are awesome 

https://modernpsychedelics.net/podcast/jinica-torrez-iboga

Tim Ferriss podcast on his own childhood sexual abuse and healing journey is also amazing 

https://tim.blog/2020/09/14/how-to-heal-trauma/

[Etherial Cat]

1 hour ago, knakoo said:

Is this kind of stuff really common for you ? Like every week ? For women in general ? Are you 1 out of a 1000 attractive to make men so crazy and gross ?

Nope, I am not a 1 in 1000. 

This one guy was surely an original. But I got "traditionally" flashed in a park by a creep last September. He got his dick out and started polishing his weewee looking salaciously at me.

I would say that getting freaked out by a pervert happens sometimes. The pace is hard to define.

In the last year it happened 3 times. The other one was a guy who followed me on the street, and asked me straight how much I would want to fuck. And no, I don't look nor dress up like a street hooker. 

For women in general, yes it is common. I would say even, way too common.

If I'd take something like flashing, a lot of my close friends got flashed in daily situation (shopping mall, waiting for transport, or in front of their buildings).

I have countless of ridiculous stories. You'd be shocked how audacious and diverse creeps are.  For instance at my university, there was a creep digging holes in the toilet wall spying on the girls taking a pee.  And very often up to these days, I see these type of holes in public toilets or bars. I always fill them with paper toilet. 

I also have a very good looking girl friend who got once harassed by an old man on public transport. He sat next to her in an empty train, waited for her to stand up and tried to dig his walking stick in her ass. 

But these stories are only the tip of the iceberg. If I'd have to write down the number of horror that happened to me, my friend and my acquaintances, you'd stop laughing pretty fast. 

As I wrote it in another post, a friend of mine got raped by a stranger walking back home and an acquaintance was driven away in a ghetto and raped with a knife on a mattress.

Edited June 27, 2021 by Etherial Cat

[Etherial Cat]

1 hour ago, Lucas-fgm said:

Pretty weird. Tbh I didn't know this kind of stuff was that common.

This thread really changed my mind about what women have to go through.

It's really eye-opening to talk about this kind of stuff with you girls. Thanks a lot.

Thanks a lot for receiving it well and creating the space for us to narrate these tales.

[Etherial Cat]

37 minutes ago, knakoo said:

If anyone wants to learn more about the perspective of a sexually abused woman and the trauma it creates, I highly recommend this podcast episode. The woman telling her story is so vulnerable, it's beautiful and very touching. I felt so much love for her listening to it.

Plus the girls hosting are awesome 

https://modernpsychedelics.net/podcast/jinica-torrez-iboga

Tim Ferriss podcast on his own childhood sexual abuse and healing journey is also amazing 

https://tim.blog/2020/09/14/how-to-heal-trauma/

Cool, thanks. I'll have a look.

[knakoo]

4 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Nope, I am not a 1 in 1000. 

This one guy was an original. But I got flashed in a park by a creep last September. He got his dick out and started polishing his weewee looking salaciously at me.

I would say that getting freaked out by a pervert happens sometimes. The pace is hard to define.

In the last year it happened 3 times. The other one was a guy who followed me on the street, and asked me straight how much I would want to fuck. And no, I don't look nor dress up like a street hooker. 

For women in general, yes it is common. I would say even, way too common.

If I'd take something like flashing, a lot of my close friends got flashed in daily situation (shopping mall, waiting for transport, or in front of their buildings).

I have countless of ridiculous stories. You'd be shocked how audacious and diverse creeps are.  For instance at my university, there was a creep digging holes in the toilet wall spying on the girls taking a pee.  And very often up to these days, I see these type of holes in public toilets or bars. I always fill them with paper toilet. I have a very good looking girl friend who got once harassed by an old man on public transport. He sat next to her in an empty train, waited for her to stand up and tried to dig his walking stick in her ass.

But these stories are only the tip of the iceberg. If I'd have to write down the number of horror that happened to me, my friend and my acquaintances, you'd stop laughing pretty fast.

As I wrote it in another post, a friend of mine got raped by a stranger walking back home and an acquaintance was driven away in a ghetto and raped with a knife on a mattress.

 

Thank you for sharing all of this. I am genially impressed by the time and care you take trying to help people on this forum  

And yes the whole culture around consent is really quite sad...

This whole conversation reminds me how, as a teenage boy in a bus, an older man put a vest between me and him and tried to touch me. My first reaction was to freeze. Events like this probably happen to a lot of people.

[Peter Miklis]

6 hours ago, Etherial Cat said:

As I wrote it in another post, a friend of mine got raped by a stranger walking back home and an acquaintance was driven away in a ghetto and raped with a knife on a mattress.

That's sad. Sorry for your friend.

[integral]

14 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Yes I agree that educating women about potential dangers can help them be more serious and careful and avoid potential situations and be vigilant.

But realize this what I'm saying next and think very carefully about it.

I'm born in a stage Blue culture.

I'm regularly bombarded with messages from mothers and girls like "don't be close to boys" and "don't be friends with men"and "don't be alone around men "

This has created a strong environment of fear around men to the point where men just can't date women 

Any behaviour from a man, even if it is with good intentions is misconstrued as bad.

It creates alienation between gender like a cold war between the gender.

In India it is very difficult to date a woman , even befriend her, Because she will look at every guy suspiciously, you can never invite her over a drink , the women act reserved and develop some sort of an aversion to men out of fear..

Everything a man does is looked at suspiciously, obviously because every girl is trained by her mother to avoid a man as much as possible.

The only man she will know is her husband who is decided by her parents.

You can't even meet a girl on an indian dating website.

Do you want to create such a wall between gender in western countries ?

Do you want women to constantly fear men ?

Fearing men in my country has definitely reduced sexual assaults in my country because I never go out with a man, I'm very reserved around men in real life. I only talk to them but I'm hardly ever in their presence.

This creates a culture that screams "men are predators" and "live in fear of men or get sexually assaulted "

Do you want this culture?

Do you want all men to be tainted by the predatory actions of a few men ??

There are so many good men.

Why should they suffer ? They want to adore and respect women and they can't do that because no woman can trust them..

This kind of culture destroys gender relations completely. Leaving both men and women very dissatisfied.

 

In my culture, women are shamed and blamed if they are raped..it's her fault that she is trusted that guy. The guy never learns the consequences of his behaviour and the girl forever avoids men 

All girls get the message "avoid men" 

It achieves low crime rate but at a huge cost to normal relationships in society 

If you lived in a stage Blue culture, where no woman wants to have a drink with you, you would feel very strange and isolated and outcast as a man.

You would even start thinking that you are like a predator when you don't harbour those instincts.. you're automatically supposed to assume that you have beastly instincts even if you are innocent.

I don't think you want that ?

 

I agree, this is problematic. 

How i imagine education reform, is teaching a number of core self-mastery, self-awareness, multi-cultural- interpersonal, societal and spiritual subjects early life, starting as children.

Any subjects that focus on helping people understand each other and themselves will facilitate major changes.  I imagine this would cause riots in the streets in India if any of this was thought in school. 

If men and women in India had vail of there culture lifted by a very small degree, this would contribute to moving there culture forwards in the next generation. This is a systemic growth education strategy. They don't necessarily need to be aware there doing it, but the seeds need to be planted so to nurture children/environment. Pushing culture forward. This is how we get the changes in society we are seeking. 

Cultural changes cannot happen with out both educating men and women at the same time, because change is long term, interconnect with a bunch of cultural and social systems and multi generational.

What is a education strategy that moves society forward? 

I've mentioned women education only to show that it is a part of a big picture long term plan and that it is nested  into everything. 

Lets keep long term multi-generational plan into mind when answering this:

What is the education blue men need in India? 

What is the education blue women need in India?

---

Teaching "Boys will be boys" or "Better watch out for some boys" is not equal to "complete peoples understanding of each other and themselves".

• The former is fear based. 
• The later is life transforming multi-perspectival education. Integrating masculine/feminine as well as deep interpersonal understanding/empathy. Its also adaptive and sensitive to the cultural its being thought in. So the expression of it is not fixed.

Edited June 27, 2021 by integral

[Preety_India]

13 minutes ago, integral said:

I agree, this is problematic. 

How i imagine education reform, is teaching a number of core self-mastery, self-awareness, multi-cultural- interpersonal, societal and spiritual subjects early life, starting as children.

Any subjects that focus on helping people understand each other and themselves will facilitate major changes.  I imagine this would cause riots in the streets in India if any of this was thought in school. 

If men and women in India had vail of there culture lifted by a very small degree, this would contribute to moving there culture forwards in the next generation. This is a systemic growth education strategy. They don't necessarily need to be aware there doing it, but the seeds need to be planted so to nurture children/environment. Pushing culture forward. This is how we get the changes in society we are seeking. 

Cultural changes cannot happen with out both educating men and women at the same time, because change is long term, interconnect with a bunch of cultural and social systems and multi generational.

What is a education strategy that moves society forward? 

I've mentioned women education only to show that it is a part of a big picture long term plan and that it is nested  into everything. 

Lets keep long term multi-generational plan into mind when answering this:

What is the education blue men need in India? 

What is the education blue women need in India?

---

Teaching "Boys will be boys" or "Better watch out for some boys" is not equal to "complete peoples understanding of each other and themselves".

• The former is fear based. 
• The later is life transforming multi-perspectival education. Integrating masculine/feminine as well as deep interpersonal understanding/empathy. Its also adaptive and sensitive to the cultural its being thought in. So the expression of it is not fixed.

Well said. I kinda understand your overall sentiment 

 

 

[bejapuskas]

@Windappreciator What you are saying is just ridiculous. Should they just accept that they can be raped at any point? I mean, should they not speak out and fight for awareness and change of behavior?

@Preety_India Thank you for talking about your cultural context here. I think it is crucial for these guys to understand what you post about. The West-centric perspective is dangerous. But that does not mean that rape only happens in the third world countries, it happens in every single country, women are not safe from rape anywhere. Not even at home.

@kai0 I am glad you understand that rape is never alright. The reason why girls wear clothes like this is often exactly because they are slut shamed by their environments. They want to rebel against that by what they wear. Have you never rebelled? Isn't it kind of natural to rebel? 

@Gesundheit2 @integral I understand why you guys would write the things you are writing, but like women already get these points. You are not being profound saying things like this. You are not opening anyone's mind from ignorance by stating the obvious. There is no need to "show women the dark reality" when they live it. They understand it better than you. What's needed is to bring awareness. Of course, it is beneficial to show other people different perspectives on things, but like sometimes it is also too much and it needs to be made clear that a perspective is not OK. Please don't undermine people's efforts to bring awareness to the table, I don't think you mean it, but just stop. You can't have immediate change, but that they also already know. This has been an issue since humanity started, it is so obvious that immediate change is not obvious. 

Nobody is denying that men can also be raped, but like there is some sort of inequality about the way people are aware of this. That means that both sides are privileged and disadvantaged in different ways. Some incels might victim-blame male rape victims by telling them that a man cannot be raped because they would enjoy it. That's wrong and horrible. I am willing to ban anyone who does this on this forum. But women are also victim blamed, slut shamed. 

Your sexuality is OK. You can have desires. Maybe at this point in time there is nobody who is willing to give you, or maybe there is, but make sure you satisfy your desires in a morally acceptable way. When you have a girlfriend, she might be horny less often than you. It might be frustrating for you. But understand that when you are feeling sick for example, her seducing you might be annoying even though normally it is not. It is OK to say something like "Baby, I am sorry for being so horny all the time, I guess I should find other things to do with my life instead of trying to escape, corona virus is affecting my in this way negatively. Sorry." And just masturbate on it to have some relief. Wait for her to get turned on. Or learn about female pleasure and communicate with her about what she wants to make her more turned on by you. That might also be an issue/solution.

[Nahm]

On 6/25/2021 at 8:39 AM, integral said:

No amount of education about consent is going to get that kid to keep it in his pants. But this narrative is offensive to women. They don't want to hear it. Both sides need to take responsibility. 

Yes it is indeed offensive. Can you put yourself in their shoes? Can you sincerely, viscerally imagine getting raped, and then listening to someone imply you should have been more responsible, because ‘no amount of education about consent is going to get that kid to keep it in his pants’?

Can you see there is no actuality of “that kid”? 

You’re expressing your view. Not some hypothetical kid(s). If said hypothetical kid wants to express his opinion, great. But he can’t express yours anymore than you can express his. 

[Windappreciator]

@bejapuskas Of course they should, they should do all of the righteous things. 

But alongside that they can do something else in their minds.

Edited June 28, 2021 by Windappreciator

[Preety_India]

@bejapuskas very few people on this thread cared to listen. 

Thanks for listening.