One of the most important thing to understand about women

[Harlen Kelly]

13 minutes ago, Vzdoh said:

action driven, moving forward, assertive, takes good care of me, provides positive containment and security and safety. My libido just went through the roof to be honest and I couldn't wait to jump the guy. 

But all the non-alpha behaviours like splitting bills, calculating investments in the excel, treating me like an equal/dude, not providing containment, not taking care of me, actually demanding my support and care like a little boy, not going out of his way to make me happy - with these types of behaviour I noticed my libido dropped like a rock and I simply stopped desiring that guy. 

You are indeed a very rare and aware female. Most women would not admit that in a thousand years.

[Vzdoh]

@Lucas-fgm he sounds exactly like my ex NZ guy who I dropped because I didn't feel masculine polarity with him as he basically transmitted to me that he needs appreciation, care, reassurance, constant validation, he needs to be wanted and desired. All of these made me feel masculine, not feminine and that's when my libido dropped like a rock and I practically stopped wanting him. 

Maybe this is the reason why my comments about beta men and in particular sharing that experience about my ex, triggered him so much to the point of attacking and trying to diagnose me with multiple issues and so many assumptions were made on my behalf, it was quite scary actually, to observe such severe reaction. 

[MatteO22]

2 minutes ago, Lucas-fgm said:

Being authentic, not lying to make her like me, would make her trust me more. 

These are actually somewhat feminine traits because they encompass emotional vulnerability.

5 minutes ago, Lucas-fgm said:

100% sure, that when I was assertive and led the relationship, and could provide the feeling of protection without being needy.

I’m right there with you I’m not opposed to being that way what so ever, being a leader doesn’t exclude the awareness of your own emotional well-being at all. It’s quite the opposite, it’s because you’re aware of your emotional self and are taking care of yourself in such a good way, you extend that self-care and self-love onto others by positive containment. It doesn’t have to do anything with doing extreme sports, it has to do with the ability of taking positive ownership of those around you, and for that to be done well you actually need a good feminine background of emotional sensitivity, otherwise you won’t be able to intuit the needs of others. 

[Tangerinedream]

Did anyone see this video? (What women should know about men) 

 

[MatteO22]

10 minutes ago, Tangerinedream said:

Did anyone see this video? (What women should know about men) 

 

I’ve seen it, it didn’t resonate at all. It seems that I’d have to put myself into a position for being loved for what I do. But that’s not unconditional love, unconditional love is given regardless of what you do, just on the basis of who you are. 
 

I also am coming from a place where In the past I was in the position of valuing myself based on what I can do for others, and in the name of health and healing that had to fall away. In really simplified terms, men who feel like they are valued based on Their actions didn’t have unconditionally loving moms and there’s a big shadow in that relationship. 
 

edit: let me specify, if I said my self-esteem was about being useful and needed that would be me being insecure. It’s much more different than saying I have the ability to be useful and needed, and yet it’s not a condition of why I am loved or lovable. 

Edited June 16, 2021 by MatteO22

[Etherial Cat]

3 hours ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Fatuous, dull-witted take. 

I'm sorry if I come off as blunt with you Harlen Kelly, but you've got a very arrogant, displeasing and aggressive way to state your opinion - and this on a regular basis.

It would be nice if you could tame these aspects because it's not worthy of this type of forum.

[Harlen Kelly]

@Etherial Cat

4 hours ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Sounds like what an awkward creep who cant talk dirty would say 

4 hours ago, Harlen Kelly said:

Fatuous, dull-witted take. 

Which one of these statements is more ''aggressive'' or offensive, one is directed at an opinion (take) and the other is directed at a person?

You are indeed impartial, aren't you. 

Edited June 16, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[MatteO22]

1 minute ago, Harlen Kelly said:

@Etherial Cat

Which one of this statements is more ''aggressive'' or offensive, one is directed towards an opinion (take) and the other is directed towards a person?

You are indeed impartial, aren't you. 

Dear sir, what you’re doing here is gaslighting and attempting to blame the victims of your abrasive and abusive behaviour without taking a hard hard look on your own narcissistic tendencies. I am saddened that behaviour like this isn’t more regulated for in my eyes you’d be instantly banworthy, based on the quality and tonality of your posts not just in this thread. 

[Harlen Kelly]

@MatteO22 There is a hide option, if you don't like the way I state my opinions you already know what to do. Send me a private message and I'll teach how to do it.

[Zeroguy]

14 hours ago, mandyjw said:

I grew up in such a sheltered environment with such sheltering people around me that I took the belief on myself that if something bad happened it was my fault for venturing out. So I never went to a club, never drank alcohol outside my house and didn't even go to college. 

Jesus christ you grew up in a cult. 

 

 

[assx95]

Since y'all are discussing women, let me pitch in, as a 25-year-old virgin (I don't like labelling myself, but it's to establish the context) living In India (that's again for context too) 

It's now my responsibility to put things across as they really were: 

All women whom I found attractive and who were in my social circle, at some point of time (I'll now generalize these 10-15 women), it was so much smoother in the beginning, but things would really turn around when I started falling in love with them, i would feel the need to text them how I feel, and ask them out more often than they usually hung around with me, all this was in line and authentic with how I really felt, but somehow, women didn't like this. All of them, in some way or another, would withdraw, and some reacted violently asking me to fuck off or stay away from them, or it would be as subtle as not contacting me ever again, and some would just leave me on read.

So, being myself, and expressing how I really feel, in the moment, was a big turn off for all these women. Something I couldn't wrap my mind around this. I felt hurt too. When i was 21-22, i tried pickup too, in pubs and nightclubs, was surprised that someone who is absolutely new to this, could get numbers and dates, i did 50-100 approaches, but in the end, i had no gf, or a girl who was really attracted to me enough to stay around. 

I would watch RSD videos when i was trying to pickup girls, but then i stopped, but i wasn't aware of redpill until I was 25, i absorbed that content like a sponge, but then months later, I could see how it was toxic, and it was making me manipulative and sneakier. Not in line with me seeking to just be. And merge with reality. So, I am saying no to redpill. 

I have never even kissed a girl in my girl. And at this point - I'm like- Fuck this shit! Fuck women! I have tried enough, and apparently, women don't like me or are creeped out when I try and when I express how I feel and what I feel. I give up. I won't try anymore. 

If any of you women feel triggered by what I said, I'm sorry, but this is how my life has been. And I am just bringing out my perspective. 

[Tangerinedream]

15 minutes ago, MatteO22 said:

am saddened that behaviour like this isn’t more regulated

There is a lot goes unregulated I don’t think anyone moderates this section of the forum 

[Raptorsin7]

How would you moderate this particular discussion?

Ban people because they stuff that you don't like lol?

[Tangerinedream]

Just now, Raptorsin7 said:

How would you moderate this particular discussion?

Ban people because they stuff that you don't like lol?

Lol, I didn’t see anything particularly mean said here but there are lots of toxic or mean comments said regularly around this forum 

[MatteO22]

Just now, Raptorsin7 said:

How would you moderate this particular discussion?

Ban people because they stuff that you don't like lol?

Not at all, issue warnings and bans for insults and attacks, such as calling someone dull witted, or attacking someone with the insult of ‘being a fucking hoe from Germany where all girls are horrible and masculine’. Which is what happened in the thread that was deleted with the data loss. 

[Tangerinedream]

8 minutes ago, assx95 said:

Since y'all are discussing women, let me pitch in, as a 25-year-old virgin (I don't like labelling myself, but it's to establish the context) living In India (that's again for context too) 

It's now my responsibility to put things across as they really were: 

All women whom I found attractive and who were in my social circle, at some point of time (I'll now generalize these 10-15 women), it was so much smoother in the beginning, but things would really turn around when I started falling in love with them, i would feel the need to text them how I feel, and ask them out more often than they usually hung around with me, all this was in line and authentic with how I really felt, but somehow, women didn't like this. All of them, in some way or another, would withdraw, and some reacted violently asking me to fuck off or stay away from them, or it would be as subtle as not contacting me ever again, and some would just leave me on read.

So, being myself, and expressing how I really feel, in the moment, was a big turn off for all these women. Something I couldn't wrap my mind around this. I felt hurt too. When i was 21-22, i tried pickup too, in pubs and nightclubs, was surprised that someone who is absolutely new to this, could get numbers and dates, i did 50-100 approaches, but in the end, i had no gf, or a girl who was really attracted to me enough to stay around. 

I would watch RSD videos when i was trying to pickup girls, but then i stopped, but i wasn't aware of redpill until I was 25, i absorbed that content like a sponge, but then months later, I could see how it was toxic, and it was making me manipulative and sneakier. Not in line with me seeking to just be. And merge with reality. So, I am saying no to redpill. 

I have never even kissed a girl in my girl. And at this point - I'm like- Fuck this shit! Fuck women! I have tried enough, and apparently, women don't like me or are creeped out when I try and when I express how I feel and what I feel. I give up. I won't try anymore. 

If any of you women feel triggered by what I said, I'm sorry, but this is how my life has been. And I am just bringing out my perspective. 

Thanks for sharing your story.  Sorry it’s been this way for you.  
I think the problem is that you appear too needy too early, in the beginning girls like a bit of mystery. If you tell a girl you’re in love with her before anything happened sexually between you it will repel us. 

[Tangerinedream]

5 minutes ago, MatteO22 said:

Not at all, issue warnings and bans for insults and attacks, such as calling someone dull witted, or attacking someone with the insult of ‘being a fucking hoe from Germany where all girls are horrible and masculine’. Which is what happened in the thread that was deleted with the data loss. 

There is some toxic comments going on in the other thread the  ‘broke up with my older girlfriend’ one 

[Etherial Cat]

13 minutes ago, Harlen Kelly said:

@Etherial Cat

Which one of this statements is more ''aggressive'' or offensive, one is directed towards an opinion (take) and the other is directed towards a person?

You are indeed impartial, aren't you. 

It has nothing to do with being partial and/or siding with @soos_mite_ah.

If you call someone dull-witted, don't be surprised if they answer you something unkind right after. ?

Your attitude is quite offensive to other forum on a regular basis. So that's not an isolated event. I've read a lot of thread where you interact and you've also been low-key rude to me before. 

[Harlen Kelly]

@Etherial Cat  My comment was directed at her take, not the person. Her comment was directed at me, interesting that you don't find her comment offensive isn't it?

There is no reason to suffer, just use the hide button.

Edited June 16, 2021 by Harlen Kelly

[Zeroguy]

Hahaha