I need some advice about doing Nofap

[assx95]

I am going into it with the idea that the body is intelligent enough to release excess semen through wet dreams or reabsorb it or turn it into something else or break it down.  But I have heard people getting prostate problems after holding it for two years. I have been on both extremes where I have jerked off 4-6 times for several days straight and it leads to desensitization for me. I don't get hard unless I use my hand. And I have also been on Nofap where I held on for a good 40 days and it was an amazing experience. 

There is a lot of ideology that comes with Nofap that it will attract women, and it will bring in more energy, and it will elevate spirituality. I must say it is somewhat true for me. But then, I cannot attribute it to Nofap alone. I don't want to be the guy, who in pursuit of attraction, more energy, or spirituality, doesn't listen to my body, and then gets a prostrate problem. 

I am 25, a virgin, and don't have a gf which might explain why I might be lured onto this path. But it is much more than that. I genuinely feel this is what I want to do. But then also not fuck up my body in the process. How do you guys do it? What is your frequency of ejaculating? 

[JonasVE12]

Maybe you need to focus on a more direct path to learning attraction instead of using nofap as a distraction/escape from what you really have going on there? It's entirely unrealistic to expect Nofap to solve underlying resistances such as self-doubt and fear. These will only go away when you release these emotions and focus on becoming more courageous with women, directly. Then attraction between you and women can manifest in your experience effortlessly without having to 'do' anything, as you have adapted your way of being, which is permanent. Not saying that Nofap is useless. It can create some momentum of discipline and empowering energy, but if you don't channel that into persuing learning how to get better with women, it will not be of much use in the long-term. 

You say it yourself. You are a virgin. Do you think that is because you haven't done nofap? Or because you haven't welcomed enough courage and momentum to actually learn it directly? Because you are ran by fear?

[Harlen Kelly]

@assx95 What about having a healthy relationship with your sexuality?

Ejaculating in moderation instead of total repression on one end of the spectrum or jerking off 4 times a day on the other end of the spectrum. 

[Danioover9000]

@assx95

11 hours ago, assx95 said:

I am going into it with the idea that the body is intelligent enough to release excess semen through wet dreams or reabsorb it or turn it into something else or break it down.  But I have heard people getting prostate problems after holding it for two years. I have been on both extremes where I have jerked off 4-6 times for several days straight and it leads to desensitization for me. I don't get hard unless I use my hand. And I have also been on Nofap where I held on for a good 40 days and it was an amazing experience. 

There is a lot of ideology that comes with Nofap that it will attract women, and it will bring in more energy, and it will elevate spirituality. I must say it is somewhat true for me. But then, I cannot attribute it to Nofap alone. I don't want to be the guy, who in pursuit of attraction, more energy, or spirituality, doesn't listen to my body, and then gets a prostrate problem. 

I am 25, a virgin, and don't have a gf which might explain why I might be lured onto this path. But it is much more than that. I genuinely feel this is what I want to do. But then also not fuck up my body in the process. How do you guys do it? What is your frequency of ejaculating? 

   It comes down to what you want from NoFap, and what you want to use it for.

   Mantak Chia and taoist practices have theories around the frequency from each age groups, and since you're in your twenties it's okay to fap once and rest  for 4-8 days, unless you feel more negative from a fap.

  I do NoFap because for some reason masturbating once or more has negative effects in my body that I feel flu and fever like, so I do this practice for health. Sometimes I go longer.

   

[Osaid]

I think you need to be properly developed when doing longer days of no fap. If you've been fapping daily for like 8 years and you jump straight into some regimen where you're not doing it for 30 days, you're probably gonna end up edging a lot and suppressing a lot of sexual urges, which could end up being a bad thing mentally and physically. I would recommend easing yourself into it.

After my flatline from my first 30 days of no fap, I have developed very high control over my libido. Doing no fap has become 100x easier, because my urges are under control now. This was not achieved by just mentally suppressing it, something seems to have shifted in my psychology and body after the flatline which allows me to go many days without masturbating, without any urges popping up out of nowhere. My sexual urges only appear if I willingly do something sexually stimulating. The difference between no fap back then and no fap now is night and day. It's not a matter of mentally pushing through the urges with brute force, It's like I have a much more efficient state of mind for doing it now, where there are no more urges to suppress. I think getting into this state of mind before pursuing long periods of no fap is key, it just feels so much more natural rather than constantly suppressing sexual urges.

Your prostate will produce more prostatic fluid when you are aroused, so do your best not to edge. If you are excessively edging you might as well just do it at that point instead of suppressing it.

12 hours ago, assx95 said:

I don't want to be the guy, who in pursuit of attraction, more energy, or spirituality, doesn't listen to my body, and then gets a prostrate problem.

Just listen to your body, then. You're not gonna get problems at day 30 or around there if you're not edging or something. Your body is smart, it will try to release excess prostatic fluid through wet dreams or through urination. Pay attention to your body, over all.

12 hours ago, assx95 said:

There is a lot of ideology that comes with Nofap that it will attract women, and it will bring in more energy, and it will elevate spirituality. I must say it is somewhat true for me. But then, I cannot attribute it to Nofap alone. I don't want to be the guy, who in pursuit of attraction, more energy, or spirituality, doesn't listen to my body, and then gets a prostrate problem. 

You will get pretty much all of those benefits after 30 days of no fap. IME, the benefits definitely cap at a certain point. I find that the energy benefits cap at around day 7, but a solid month of no fap was needed to rebuild my capacity for sexual pleasure. Pay attention to how you feel and whether the benefits are actually increasing or not.

Keep in mind, if you have been fapping excessively for most of your life, it wouldn't be a bad idea to go for long periods to reset any sort of effect that might have had. It has been proven in rats that masturbating temporarily reduces androgen receptor density, and not to mention the dopaminergic effects doing it daily could have. Not a bad idea to give your body a break from all those processes. 

Edited June 10, 2021 by Osaid

[assx95]

@JonasVE12 Primarily, I was too caught up falling in love with girls who played hard to get, that, and I spent a lot of time fapping, which I could have used, the time and the energy to talk to girls instead. But back then, I didn't have fearlessness, as I do now. I mean if my confidence at 18, was 10/100, now it is 70/100. I don't hesitate to ask girls I like on dates. And then I get rejected. Even I have the confidence, I just don't know how to play the game. I get first dates, and it is downhill from there. 

@Harlen Kelly I noticed how I believe that holding semen will lead to something great, spiritually or attraction-wise, but I can see how it is an unquestioned ideology. Will have to experiment. 

@Danioover9000 These practices, I can't do properly, cause I don't understand exactly what's being done. But yeah, doing it daily, does affect my mental state and health. How do you decide the frequency or do you go with what the body tells you? 

@Osaid Yeah, I feel like you hit the sweet spot when you talked about the body needing rest after so much fapping. And yeah, edging might be the elephant in the room here. Not that if it is bad per se, but if you're doing it frequently, but still wanting to hold on to semen, you might as well start all over again. 

 

[Windappreciator]

Yes the benefits of no fap are there, combine that with some meditative practice like tai chi that might make you notice them even more.

Don't beat yourself up, even if you weren't a virgin there are still reasons to do no fap besides it being an attempt at getting a girl.

[Danioover9000]

@assx95

15 hours ago, assx95 said:

@JonasVE12 Primarily, I was too caught up falling in love with girls who played hard to get, that, and I spent a lot of time fapping, which I could have used, the time and the energy to talk to girls instead. But back then, I didn't have fearlessness, as I do now. I mean if my confidence at 18, was 10/100, now it is 70/100. I don't hesitate to ask girls I like on dates. And then I get rejected. Even I have the confidence, I just don't know how to play the game. I get first dates, and it is downhill from there. 

@Harlen Kelly I noticed how I believe that holding semen will lead to something great, spiritually or attraction-wise, but I can see how it is an unquestioned ideology. Will have to experiment. 

@Danioover9000 These practices, I can't do properly, cause I don't understand exactly what's being done. But yeah, doing it daily, does affect my mental state and health. How do you decide the frequency or do you go with what the body tells you? 

@Osaid Yeah, I feel like you hit the sweet spot when you talked about the body needing rest after so much fapping. And yeah, edging might be the elephant in the room here. Not that if it is bad per se, but if you're doing it frequently, but still wanting to hold on to semen, you might as well start all over again. 

 

   Go with what the body tells you. For example, morning wood with little to no sexual thoughts, wank away. As soon as you're aware of thoughts triggering the boner, be mindful of them. I know this varies, as some men get boners in the middle or before bed, but always make sure it is genuinely from the body.

[assx95]

@Danioover9000 Yeah, it is something to be aware of. I've been living very unconsciously.