A problem of Trust

[charlie cho]

I have this issue recently where I cannot trust anybody. I am big on being collaborative and not being too negative with life but my incessant doubts about how the world is makes me negative and angry. And this negativity translates onto my friends and family. 

What is trust? I've read a book on trust by OSHO but it did not transform me ultimately. I've only got one advice from the book: "Trust yourself first." What else can I do? 

I just cannot see what trust can do for my life. What good can trust do but get me betrayed? What good can trust do but make me naive? 

[Mason Riggle]

@charlie cho learn to operate on a spectrum that goes from 0% trust, to 100% trust, and shy away from the extremes.  

Consider.. how can you even trust your experience? Perhaps this is all a dream? Maybe you're in a simulation? Or a brain in a vat hallucinating reality?  You can't say with 100% certainty.. so you base what you trust on experience, which is all you have. 

If I tell you I my car is in my driveway.. you might be inclined to trust me.. because in your experience.. people have cars, and driveways, and it's plausible that I have one, etc.. but even if you don't know for sure whether I do or not, you don't have to trust me 100% to behave as if I do, and this would be a reasonable way to go about your day. 

If I tell you I have a dragon in my living room.. you probably won't trust me as much.. because in your experience.. dragons aren't really a thing.. but even if you don't know for sure whether I do or not, you don't have to doubt 100% in order to behave as if I don't. 

[gettoefl]

first trust existence unconditionally, you have to know that it has your back, all is working for your abundant good and your highest ends

second trust your every encounter with the truth conditionally, in other words if it sounds good take it on board on trust but then verify it by testing it within, you are the source and you are the arbiter

[WelcometoReality]

23 hours ago, charlie cho said:

I have this issue recently where I cannot trust anybody. I am big on being collaborative and not being too negative with life but my incessant doubts about how the world is makes me negative and angry. And this negativity translates onto my friends and family. 

What is trust? I've read a book on trust by OSHO but it did not transform me ultimately. I've only got one advice from the book: "Trust yourself first." What else can I do? 

I just cannot see what trust can do for my life. What good can trust do but get me betrayed? What good can trust do but make me naive? 

You are probably seeing ways that this distrust is effecting your life negatively or else you would go on like this without even thinking about it. Would be glad if you could trust us enough share it. ?

Can you really have intimate relationships with others if there is no trust? 

[JosephKnecht]

On 6/8/2021 at 8:20 PM, charlie cho said:

What is trust? I've read a book on trust by OSHO but it did not transform me ultimately. I've only got one advice from the book: "Trust yourself first." What else can I do? 

 

You have to deconstruct the bullshit that you have within you. 

Once you deconstruct your own bullshit, you can smell the bullshit of others from a mile away. 

The problem of deconstructing your own bullshit is that it would smell and won't be pleasant.

But once your bullshit is gone, you can trust your intuition.

Your intuition will tell you who is bullshitting you. Trust That.

[charlie cho]

@JosephKnecht awesome shit

[charlie cho]

@WelcometoReality I agree. How can I love another if there is no trust. After all, love is the highest value I hold for myself. My parents were not trusting people, especially my father. 

I hate being the constant doubter. Ah! It's so ugly! I remember a high school friend who doubted everything and it was just plain ugly. He was delusional and ugly with his doubts. My father is the same, but he was good at framing his doubts with beautiful packaging.

Obviously, I have seen the glimmer of light through the end of this tunnel of doubts, so I ask for advice from anyone who did not necessarily have problems with trust in their life. 

I for instance never had a problem with money and making friends. Now, I need help from people who never had a problem with trust and being able to see through bullshit. haha 

I don't know why when you speak, I suddenly find myself emotionally deconstructing LOL 

Edited June 9, 2021 by charlie cho

[WelcometoReality]

46 minutes ago, charlie cho said:

@WelcometoReality I agree. How can I love another if there is no trust. After all, love is the highest value I hold for myself. My parents were not trusting people, especially my father. 

I hate being the constant doubter. Ah! It's so ugly! I remember a high school friend who doubted everything and it was just plain ugly. He was delusional and ugly with his doubts. My father is the same, but he was good at framing his doubts with beautiful packaging.

Obviously, I have seen the glimmer of light through the end of this tunnel of doubts, so I ask for advice from anyone who did not necessarily have problems with trust in their life. 

I for instance never had a problem with money and making friends. Now, I need help from people who never had a problem with trust and being able to see through bullshit. haha 

I've had trust issues as well. They when I got hurt by a friend as a teenager. It was difficult to trust people after that. Deep down in the unconscious I didn't want to trust people because I didn't want to get hurt like that again. However after dealing with that issue I could after some years forgive him and that eventually led to being able to trust people again. Maybe this isn't the case for you. You will have to dig deep to find it. Or maybe you already know why. 

58 minutes ago, charlie cho said:

I don't know why when you speak, I suddenly find myself emotionally deconstructing LOL 

Oh I don't think its because it's me speaking. I think it's because you are bringing stuff up to the surface. It's good! Let the healing begin. ?