SQAAD

Why do some People Ridicule other people?

21 posts in this topic

Why do some people make fun of other people?? This is something i've never understood... Because i don't do it.

For example when i was a child i never made fun of other kids. But what i've noticed is that many kids make fun of other kids who are different than they are. Is that because of bad parenting? Or what?

Why would a child make fun of someone who is stuttering or someone who is fat?? I really don't get it..

Edited by SQAAD

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

From the lens of spiral dynamics, kids go through the stages starting at beige as babies. Teasing and bullying sounds to me like the child has reached stage red, so it's about creating a pecking order, one child trying to raise their status in the group by putting other children down. It happens everywhere, and needs mature adults of higher stages to deal with it constructively. With good parenting and teaching however, the children should grow into community-minded stage blue. 


Relax, it's just my loosely held opinion.  :) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There is no reason. It is just fun. For some people. They don't recognise the implications and don't feel deep satisfaction but a sense of significance. 


You can derive it from simple logic

Left means not right

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Simply egos fighting other egos.

If you don't have much of one or it's smaller than most then that is why it doesn't make sense to you.


hrhrhtewgfegege

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ego fight would mean to be defensive. But sometimes it is just out of pure boredom to entertain oneself. 


You can derive it from simple logic

Left means not right

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, SQAAD said:

Why do some people make fun of other people??

I see people who are deeply insecure do this the most. Unconscious or low consciousness people in general tend to feed on negativity. Look at most media and news broadcasts,,,,


"To have a free mind is to be a universal heretic." - A.H. Almaas

"We have to bless the living crap out of everyone." - Matt Kahn

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all for the replies so far but.. still i feel like my question hasn't been answered to the extent that i wished for.. I still don't get it why some kids for example make fun of other kids.

I've noticed that some other kids never do this. They never made fun of other kids. How is that explained? Even as a kid it wasn't fun for me to ridicule others. I found it disgusting. Which it is.

Edited by SQAAD

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Has nothing to do with intelligence or genetic predispositions.

The kids getting bullied usually have people pleaser or strong neurotic parents or both.

They mirror it and this looks weird to other kids and contradicts their reality so they often don't know better. 

Edited by IAmReallyImportant

You can derive it from simple logic

Left means not right

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

When the ego (a subtle object that claims to be the subject) is present, the mental/emotional body reacts to this lie by saying "you're inadequate", "you're inferior", "you're worthless" etc. all of which is true, because it's about the ego, not the body/personality.

The ego doesn't want you to realize that these feelings are pointing to it, so it will point to something else as the culprit. This something else is usually either one's own body/personality or someone else's.

By ridiculing others, whether overtly or in one's own mind it diverts attention from itself. But ridiculing oneself is the same thing. The ego is saying, it's not me, it's this body or this personality that sucks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@vladorion

13 hours ago, vladorion said:

When the ego (a subtle object that claims to be the subject) is present, the mental/emotional body reacts to this lie by saying "you're inadequate", "you're inferior", "you're worthless" etc. all of which is true, because it's about the ego, not the body/personality.

The ego doesn't want you to realize that these feelings are pointing to it, so it will point to something else as the culprit. This something else is usually either one's own body/personality or someone else's.

By ridiculing others, whether overtly or in one's own mind it diverts attention from itself. But ridiculing oneself is the same thing. The ego is saying, it's not me, it's this body or this personality that sucks.

Very very good points!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

it's an attempt to assert one's superiority. it flatters the ego while providing amusement. It's quite silly I know.. I rarely meet people who has never ridiculed someone in their life (if not in real life, they do it online). I'm myself guilty of it. The only people I know personally who never ridicule anyone were Echoists.. it's kinda sad.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/7/2021 at 0:59 PM, vladorion said:

When the ego (a subtle object that claims to be the subject) is present, the mental/emotional body reacts to this lie by saying "you're inadequate", "you're inferior", "you're worthless" etc. all of which is true, because it's about the ego, not the body/personality.

The ego doesn't want you to realize that these feelings are pointing to it, so it will point to something else as the culprit. This something else is usually either one's own body/personality or someone else's.

By ridiculing others, whether overtly or in one's own mind it diverts attention from itself. But ridiculing oneself is the same thing. The ego is saying, it's not me, it's this body or this personality that sucks.

In my understanding this points to the degree of being realized or possessed or as phrased in the New Testament - to have your being. In some contemporary circles it’s framed as mind/ego/false personality identified juxtaposed with realized essence/presence/being.

An Important Difference Between the Mind and Being

These fantasies, beliefs and misinformation actually accompany almost all internalized object relations to some extent. Internalized object relations are rarely true representations of actual events or relationships. One’s memory traces include all kinds of ideas, fantasies and images that never had an objective reality. Another source of extraneous material comes from the psychic processes of organization and integration themselves. These processes modify the original object relations as more impressions are internalized. This is necessary for the integration of object relations units of various affect and content. This extra material, whether it is attached to actual memories of object relations or consists of pure fabrications, cannot be absorbed into Being. This is an important difference between the mind and Being. The mind can absorb and identify with any psychic material it believes to be true. It does not have the capacity, on its own, to discern what is objective truth and what is not. In other words, the mind can be deceived, even by itself. Being, on the other hand, is pure reality. It is the actual stuff and consciousness of truth, and cannot be deceived. It does not try not to be deceived; it is simply truth by its nature, a self-conscious medium made of pure sensitivity. Any falsehood, that is, anything which is not the objective truth of what actually happened in past interactions which produced a particular object relation, is felt in comparison to Being to be dull, gross and distasteful. When one is in contact with Being, these falsehoods are felt to be lifeless, thick and heavy veils in comparison to the luminosity of Being.

Pearl Beyond Price, pg. 163

Taken from - https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/being

 

How Being Knows Itself

Since Being is pure consciousness capable of direct awareness of itself, it does not require thinking and deduction for it to know itself. This is what most distinguishes it from the personality of the ego, which knows itself through reference to the past. One reason it is not easy to have a clear experience of Being is that the habit of ego is to know itself through reference to other perceptions, as in Descartes' "I think, therefore I am." 

Pearl Beyond Price, pg. 65

 

 

 


"To have a free mind is to be a universal heretic." - A.H. Almaas

"We have to bless the living crap out of everyone." - Matt Kahn

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6/6/2021 at 11:12 PM, SQAAD said:

I've noticed that some other kids never do this. They never made fun of other kids. How is that explained? Even as a kid it wasn't fun for me to ridicule others. I found it disgusting. Which it is.

I wouldn't be so quick to assume you never made fun and judged others.  I mean, at least within yourself rather than expressing it outright.  I know I was and pretty much have been one to not make fun of others and felt bad about it.  But also, the more I've discovered new parts of myself and gained new levels of awareness and ego-strength and worldviews, the more I can see how I could perhaps be just unconscious to those parts.  Especially by being in similar environments all my life, thus not being put in situations where making fun of others might be absolutely something I could be capable of.  

What we judge in others is usually something we judge within ourselves.  We all have the capacity, and perhaps even a current unconscious part of ourselves that is capable of that which we think we could never do or be.  


"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"   --   Marry Poppins

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 6.6.2021 at 3:20 PM, SQAAD said:

Why would a child make fun of someone who is stuttering or someone who is fat?? I really don't get it..

I can speak from my own perspective on this, since I have been a child that used to make fun of kids who were struggling.

For me when I was a child I saw some other children as inferior to me, or as weak. For examle if a child was fat and couldn't jump as high as I could in sports, I would see that and then judge him in my mind as being "silly", "fat" or "weak" and then express this feeling by bullying or laughing...

I think it has to do with the fact that children don't really filter their impulses as much as adults, they just express anything that comes to their mind. So when I saw a "weak" kid, I just thought in my mind "weak kid" and then expressed my thought by making fun of it.

Apart from the "expressing-aspect" I also got a sense of gratification out of doing this, because by putting the other person down I could see myself as superior and by comparing myself to these "weak" people my own self looked better and I could feel better about myself.

What I noticed is, that not all children do these things in the same degree. Some do it more, some do it less. I did it more than most kids and I think it has to do with genetic factors, as well as upbringing factors. A had a decent childhood and never had real struggles / problems in my life. Still I used to be like this. I think being like this had to do with the fact that I was less capable at controling my impulses at that age in comparison to other children. Also I always needed external gratification from others and hat a need to feel "special." I needed more external approval than most children at my age. Propably the reason I needed to compare myself so much to these other children and felt compelled to make fun of them / put them down.

But I also think that to some degree all people do this, adults as well. We all sometimes in our mind judge other people for whatever reason. We all have those "dirty" thoughts about others like "well, this person is just lazy / silly / a fool / whatever".

Everytime we judge somebody in our minds we essentially do the same thing the laughing child does. The only difference is, that we do not express our thoughts and hide them from other people and even sometimes ourselves.

Hope I could add some value to the debate;)


Please do not take anything I say as an insult. I have 17 warning points and I'd like to stay on this forum.

You are Love.

1 year meditation, 1 hour daily https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/76489-1-year-meditation-1h-daily-start-at-100122/

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I see it as monkeys fightining over on who is stronger... Primal shit but still, somrthing worth to look into

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Because it feels good. Making fun of others, judging, labelling and gossiping puts the one above the other person in their own eyes. It makes you feel better to see that others are inferior. It gives a survival advantage. Gossipping is also generally a good way to maintain a stale conversation when there is little that parties have in common as most people love to gossip or take piss on others.

Of course, this is purely fictional and imaginary and if you break it down you'll see it stems from a place of insecurity and lack of love. Saying that you don't make fun or judge others seems like a huge self-deception, maybe you don't see it yet.  The role of ego is to prevent the ego from seeing its own biases ;) but to project them on others 


“If you find yourself acting to impress others, or avoiding action out of fear of what they might think, you have left the path.” ― Epictetus

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Many lazy answers here, that circles around itself. 

If you want an answer with an actual foundation i can at least bring you the question which will be prior to it.

To ridicule another is no different on the core of emotion then to greet or respect another, to enjoy or appreciate another. It has no wider essence then what is emergent by the mere value one project unto the other, you ridicule another proportionately to the extent you value their existence. (not to say you value someones existence only so much as you ridicule them)
And because you were socialized to certain extents you value the reflection they omits thereafter back on you (the only alternative), be it anger or sorrow. In this regard you have given them a certain power over you.
The question i don't have a definitive philosophical answer to is WHY we so passionately value other peoples existence, you can say it's because without their many flavors we would not be able to form an identity of our-self (in which case the power we have given them truly is massive). This answer would entail the question of why identity is so important, in its core we may find evolutionary and sociological associations, but at the phenomenal level I really don't know more then to say it is an automatic passion hidden in the subconscious. 
This identity and its basic meaning should be familiar to everyone on this forum, but what may be a more unusual connection is that of how fundamentally other people are deacons to any and all our sense of self.

The answer can be mistaken for a circle-logic itself, but be aware not confusing positive feedback loops for invalid deduction, we are after all traveling from causes to consequent effects. (some of which consists of cycles as opposed to evolution, and indeed we are retarded by our cycles)

Some people feel better immediately after they spew their shit unto others, other people imitate a like behavior never to be satisfied even for a second. It is also possible tho almost not to be so distant to your own shit that you sincerely don't mean no harm and consequently don't value the target. It is for a second time impossible to not value the target whereby the action of ridicule is prolonging any meaningful sense of identity.


how much can you bend your mind? and how much do you have to do it to see straight?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Because your parents ridiculed you and your siblings over and over again; your teachers ridiculed you and your classmates over and over again; you grew up with a religion that ridiculed you over and over again

You are around it so much it is normal so you pick up on it and do it too

Other kids didn't have that environment so they don't do it

Environment too strict. Person gets insecurity for stresses/pressure/being unable to "stay in line" constantly.  Constrained.  Claustrophobic.  Person finds security in finding others that seem to be worse off than them.

Edited by PepperBlossoms

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@SQAAD

Simply because it makes us feel good.

We get a shot of serotonin as we put others down since in that process of putting others down, we inadvertently lift ourselves above that other. The result is a sense of importance and status. 

Some become highly addicted to this behavior and complain excessively at everything and everyone.

Often the need stem from low self-esteem and self-worth, and the need to rebalance the ego, by creating the false illusion of being, if only for that moment, something "better" than what one identify with.

Usually unconscious, but sometimes with maintained awareness of that process happening. 

It also is a bonding experience where bonds get stronger around a mutual stance against another party, which becomes nothing more significant than collateral damage in that process. 

Strong relationships and group belongings happen around joint causes, and often the demonization of someone else or some other group. Also the source of deep polarizations.

From both aspects, these are survival mechanisms, protecting ourselves and our egos, and protecting our social and group belonging, hence our survival in the world. 

Edited by Eph75

Want to connect? Just do it, I assure you I'm just a human being just like you, drop me a PM today. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now