I'll be leaving this forum forever

[Preety_India]

Kinda contemplating on this. 

Will write a short goodbye note when I'm finally done. 

 

[Preety_India]

Targeted, harassed, bullied... Not exactly the kind of experience I was looking for. 

 

My beginning here was good when I didn't talk to anyone. 

The day I began interacting, things got really worse. 

 

I can't handle being trolled too much. It's kinda nasty tbh.. 

In a few weeks I'll quit the forum. 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Most people just respond egoically. 

 

[Preety_India]

Especially on the internet, interactions especially if you are a woman, and especially if you are a woman from a third world country. 

 

Men tend to respond to you with bias all the time. 

I wasn't very aware of social realities before. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

The egoic responses aren't worth my time or my curiosity to learn more things. 

My curiosity is wasted here. 

My curiosity is branded as attention seeking. 

I'm branded a rebel for just speaking openly. 

I'm an outspoken person, yet I always thought this place would be far more welcoming to outspoken people. 

Yet I'm baffled by how this place is so strictly conformist. 

It shuts you down if you have a different opinion than the crowd. 

Maybe the social aspect kills all development 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I've been variously echoing this sentiment for a long time now. 

 

[Blacksheep]

@Preety_India I have been observing this forum for years as a fly on the wall, yet I've avoided getting too involved & only posted a few times for the fear of exactly what you are going through now. Sometimes, we get more involved than we expected to and the next thing we know we've become emotionally attached to the conflicts that come with online communities, especially when they offend us. Maybe...it's as if we've identified with the community too much & in return we let some people hurt us.

It's okay to step away. Let go...

 

[Preety_India]

@Blacksheep this is just the beginning of how I express myself. And I'm also a noob when it comes to internet communities. This is my first ever full blown experience of being online. I was never online before joining this forum 

I have no social media, I'm just not an internet or social person. 

The only place I ever felt where I could be truly be myself was my journals. I thought of foraying into the forum at some point and got burned badly. 

Now I'm in recovery phase by Excessively venting myself about myself in this place. Venting helps a great deal. 

It removes all the pent up angst building inside. 

In 6 months from hence, I'll be completely transformed as a person. I'll Come out stronger and better and much less attached. 

I know I have it in me. I have shown major transformations in my life at every curve. 

I'm highly mutant and volatile. 

I'm still learning a lot about internet exchange. 

I will vigorously outgrow this and come out a better person in the end. 

Thanks. 

 

 

[Blacksheep]

@Preety_India As soon as you exit this website, the words you read on this forum will be out of sight. When they leave your sight, they may linger as thoughts. When they leave your thoughts...peace.

[LastThursday]

@Preety_India I'll miss you if you leave and I'm sure many others will too, keep moving forwards and growing, don't look back.

[Preety_India]

@LastThursday thank you so much for the kind comment. It means a lot. 

 

 

[egoeimai]

Girly girly noooooo

But if you do so, I will miss u. 

[tatsumaru]

13 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Targeted, harassed, bullied... Not exactly the kind of experience I was looking for. 

 

My beginning here was good when I didn't talk to anyone. 

The day I began interacting, things got really worse. 

 

I can't handle being trolled too much. It's kinda nasty tbh.. 

In a few weeks I'll quit the forum. 

 

 

 

I think this might be similar to how boys in the third grade pull girls hair and call them names when they like them and don't know how to express it. Probably a bunch of people just secretly want to (*& you. Not easy being a girl in an ocean of frustrated and lost men.

Edited June 5, 2021 by tatsumaru

[Preety_India]

@egoeimai @sda

Thanks for the support. 

It means a lot. 

 

[mivafofa]

I really love reading your posts. Sometimes I resonate with them, sometimes they just make me think. I find your posts very unique here, because they're just so authentic, outspoken, simple and fearless. You allow yourself to be emotional, unlike anyone I've seen here... and that makes you say things most people wouldn't dare to say unfiltered - probably out of fear of being targeted, harassed, bullied like it happened to you. 

Seeing you being so emotionally free inspires mild emotional vampires to engage in a fight with you just taste a bit of that freedom and emotions. It says more about them than it says about you. That's the impression I get when reading their dismissive messages towards you.

I'd love to say they don't deserve your time, attention and emotions... but you're your own master, whatever you choose and wherever you go in life, I hope you keep that fire in you. 

[Preety_India]

1 hour ago, mivafofa said:

I really love reading your posts. Sometimes I resonate with them, sometimes they just make me think. I find your posts very unique here, because they're just so authentic, outspoken, simple and fearless. You allow yourself to be emotional, unlike anyone I've seen here... and that makes you say things most people wouldn't dare to say unfiltered - probably out of fear of being targeted, harassed, bullied like it happened to you. 

Seeing you being so emotionally free inspires mild emotional vampires to engage in a fight with you just taste a bit of that freedom and emotions. It says more about them than it says about you. That's the impression I get when reading their dismissive messages towards you.

I'd love to say they don't deserve your time, attention and emotions... but you're your own master, whatever you choose and wherever you go in life, I hope you keep that fire in you. 

Omg I never been  complimented in such a deeper detailed  way. Yay. 

Right now after reading your comment I feel like this..