Transition through Red - Appropriate use of anger

[Ya know]

Hello -

Can anyone tell me how anger can be used appropriately - if at all? 

I am coming from Jesus. Turn the other cheek, resist not evil - these principles have served me yet any concept has limitation. 

When is it right to be righteous? How can this emotion be used? What is a positive / negative example?

 

I am pursuing sports at a high level and am becoming aware of the game within the game - the stage red hierarchy that the club is structured upon. 

What resources are useful for understanding human nature, how to deal with challenges (shit testing from males) without being dragged into lower states of consciousness?

Is love the only answer?

[Ya know]

Personally I am struggling to reconcile the idea of No Self - Inaction - Meekness in such an environment - As allowing others to walk over you suggests that you are incapable of playing at a high level as it gives the impression that you will crumble during game time.

 

I have the bhagavad gita which I will re read - I think that spirituality has more application than ham fisting sermon on the mount into every scenario. 

[Opo]

4 minutes ago, Ya know said:

I am coming from Jesus. Turn the other cheek, resist not evil - these principles have served me yet any concept has limitation. 

Jesus got mad and flipped the tables. 

[thisintegrated]

What do you mean by "righteous"?

Seems like you're asking the wrong questions.  If you knew how & when to act "righteous", that wouldn't help you at all.  That could actually lower your level of awareness.

It's just not how you learn.  You learn best through failing as your authentic self.  That's what you want to improve, right?  It's not your acting skills that you're trying to improve.

 

This is like a textbook example of what Blue tends to struggle to understand.

Edited June 3, 2021 by thisintegrated

[Matt23]

1 hour ago, Ya know said:

the idea of No Self - Inaction - Meekness in such an environment - As allowing others to walk over you

I think that this is a misinterpretation.  From what I've seen, enlightened people actually express more healthy anger than most people and aren't afraid to stand up, spit their truth, and not put up with bullshit (as they see it).  

Yet... and I think here's the tricky bit with anger and confrontation, they do it in a healthy way.  This spectrum of anger might help you:

• Suppressing Anger ----------------------- Healthy Anger --------------------------------- Uncontrolled Anger

The two extremes are unhealthy.  

I was reading a book by Gabor Mate who deals a lot with people who have serious traumas.  He says, and I think this is an agreed upon idea in psychology, that unhinged, uncontrollable rage where the person is just yelling and cursing and acting wild, is actually a way to actually avoid confronting the legitimate anger and resentment the person has inside them.  And this true anger and resentment actually doesn't look like wild yelling and the like.  It can really look just like a person calmly talking, but you can sense their seriousness and that someone or something has crossed their boundaries and respect.  

So I think it's honestly about being as honest, truthful, and authentic as you can.  And sometimes that means letting of some steam.  But also notice that reacting with anger often doesn't feel as strong or satisfactory as standing your ground and fighting in a more calm and cool manner.   Not saying there won't be moments where you won't need to stand up for yourself and get rough. 

I'd recommend exploring anger and the expression of it.  It seems from what you said that you too much on the "turn the other cheek" side and probably need to go to the other side of epxressing anger, fighting, getting rough and assertive to find a better balance in life.  

Non-duality and Love doesn't mean let people walk all over you.  Because if you did that, that means you're getting shit on and harmed, which isn't loving to yourself either.  Nor does it do others any good if you can't stand up for yourself since then you'll be weaker psychologically and not as effective at helping others and showing them what strength and love really looks like.  

I'd argue that the highest form of Love includes anger.  Righteous anger.  Fighting the good fight.  Fighting for love.  

Not letting others push your around.  Showing them your here.  Your here and you're not going away and are worth their respect and attention.  

Whether that's fighting for a cause:

Or whether that's fighting for yourself.  Something you believe in.  Showing others of your might and will:

Or whatever the fuck higher cause or value it is. Whatever thing love is calling you to do.  

Whether it's a mission or your self-esteem and dignity or proving to yourself and others that you can and are made of something and deserve respect.  etc. 

Fight for that.  And don't let others take you down.  

Fight.  For the highest, most inclusive and all-encompassing love.  And this includes the world, others, and yourself.   

Fight.  

 

 

[Matt23]

Though, also, it might be wise (depending on your situation) to not get too involved in the unhealthy aspects of competition. 

Only you can judge what's the right balance for you.  

Balancing healthy versions of anger, competition, and fighting vs. unhealthy and toxic forms of these behaviors.

Also, especially sports and competitions, sometimes the best way to shut the other guy up is to win.  To show him that no matter how much he's trash talking you, he can't get inside your head.  Sometimes you might need to fight back too though.  I'm not saying just endlessly put up with shit.  

But I know that if you show that you aren't phased by anyone's trash talk or bullying, then eventually they'll realize this and give up.  

Rise above it by winning against them.  

This is what some of the better defensive players have consistently done in the NBA.  They trash talk and play so dirty to try and get the other guy angry and pissed off so as it through him off his game.  

Stay cool.