Hey guys. First of all, I would like to share with you my background. I'm a single child, raised only by my mother, who is a narcissist. As you may realize, that caused a lot of damage to my psyche. I wasn't unaware of my true value and felt like shit for almost my whole life, until my spiritual awakening. but still - there are some unresolved issues and one of them is unworthiness. Not sure how to go about it, really. Whatever I did, whatever I achieved it is still there. 3 steps forward to then make 3 steps backward. And I'm not saying about life and self-development in general here. I am aware that's how it works. But here it's different - every time I make some kind of progress I get to this barrier, this invisible wall that I can't get through. Over and over again. I reached perfection in whatever area of my life I wanted to improve and yet - it persists, It just sucks me back in the black hole of feeling like shit, self-sabotage, you name it. I am aware, that it might be caused by some situation in my life, where I made an assumption about myself, some kind of trauma that made me think about myself that way. But I can't get to the root cause of it. I'm sick and tired of all of it - I feel like a hamster in a hamster wheel, repeating the same process over and over again without any result whatsoever.