LSD Trip Report & Post Trip crisis

[Vignan]

please read the whole trip report. i dont understand why just 100ug LSD took me soo far and just this is my 1st Actual trip. so two days ago i had done 100ug and the trip lasted 14 hours. I have reached God level and realised I am the creator and I created this so called universe for me to realise and come to back to Me.

i divide the this trip into 3 parts

1. My intentions for the trip

2. The trip

3. Post Trip

 

1. I was building up the dose so previously had done 25ug and now built to 100ug and then then take 200ug based on this trip experience. As i read the reports i came to know that 100ug is a mild dose and is bets for contemplation and cannot experience ego death and any mystical exp.

and my intentions for the trip to contemplate on my life purpose and how to avoid distraction and why im getting distracted. and also regarding my spiritual path and awakening. And I decided to surrender whatever happens in this trip. very simple

2. As the trip began I was in a normal state and couldn't contemplate just waiting for the peak. At this point the visuals becoming intense and then I just layed and started to feel heavy in my limbs and felt like I dont have any of them. I just surrendered and then i started to feel the interconnectedness with everything. I got up and i feel i lost complete identity of my self. I am speaking to myself as a 3rd person. at this point there were so many questions i am asking and the the state i am there is giving answer to everything. wherever i see there are infinite fractals open and close eye. 

Now i ahd reached a place which is absolute infinity and i got merged into it. i felt like everything is me and this the pure infitie consciousness which leo speaks. I GOT ENLIGHTENED. I realised i am everthing, i touched my mother brothers and crying saying that this is the ultimate place everyone should reach, all this reality is created for us to awaken and reached your true place. 

the place was infite having infinite colours, infinite shapes, i felt everyhting is possible here and this created my world.

I realised that I am in a game and i used a cheatcode (LSD) just to ask about my purpose and and this code took me out of the game and said GAME OVER and made me realise that this is a game and your true place is absolute infinity. this gave a huge responsibility that this illusion is totally for my self and i can do anything to grow my self here and nothing can stop me. I was trying to remember all of this cos I knew i would forget all of this makes no sense. 

I became God I had so many Qs and all the answers. suffering is just an illusion when you know everything is pure love and all is one. 

I had asked the question about rape and got this beautiful insight that, I the victim, i am the accused, i am the one who murdered, and i am the one mourning, and i am the one reporting. this made so much sense that there's no point in suffering when all this is an illusion and god doesn't want you to suffer. 

At this point I have no emotions and couldnt distinguish between anger, sadness, hatred etc. I realised i am no longer this physical body and no longer Vignan hence theres no place for emotions.

 

Then I reached to a place which I called the infinite mind. Frankly speaking here I see no love or anything. Its an infite sphere enclosed in an infite wave like thing. There is no such thing as time, intelligence, its just being. I saw it and understood this is god and here theres no bliss as such how people mention. It is a place of no human intelect.

From this arose infite Love when i realised the struggle humanity which is me strugglein to get enlighten but running away from it at the same time. I realised my trure purpose is to bring everyone into the infinite conscious which I felt the highest purpose of an enlighten being. 

 

 

3. Now after the trip I am in a state of crisis. i read the book TOE and bagavad gita and realised that I have reached the true, pure absolute infinity. But as i am back to my ego self i longer can understand what happened to me and i am in a state of confusion what happened to me is real or not. Leos recent God video makes absolute sense and now I don know how do I carry it with me in sobriety. How do I keep the learning? Now I have no thoughts whatsoever my mind is so calm that im unable to do anything. i became like a dead person yet many things running inside me. I realised my life purpose and dont no now how do i proceed. I need give my love and good to this humaninity. I want to make everyone happy and help them reach their true self. 

Leo I need you to help me regarding the post trip integration I couldnt even comprehend the magnite of states that I  reached. I understood the base level consciousness cannot comprehend what is at higher lever and higher level of conscious cannot do the base level task. How do I find the balance cos most of the time I will be living in this dream state only. How do I maintain that level of consciousness while im not tripping?

[Anahata]

I strongly suggest exploring telepathy. Not in a shallow manner but in a conscious & holistic way. This has been one of the pillars that helped me with integration & experimentation within consciousness. 

[Anahata]

The experiences I had while exploring telepathy would seem absolutely impossible to someone who never had any direct awareness of such things. 

[Vignan]

How do I do it?

1 minute ago, Anahata said:

The experiences I had while exploring telepathy would seem absolutely impossible to someone who never had any direct awareness of such things. 

If this really help then I need to develop

[Anahata]

Start researching & seriously experimenting with remote viewing, telepathy, loa, lucid dreaming, astral projection, night audio programs. You have to get very creative if you are serious about this work.

[Anahata]

Just now, Vignan said:

How do I do it?

If this really help then I need to develop

First thing first, find someone who is willing to experiment with you. Ask them to give you permission for tapping into their mind and vice versa. 

Edited May 28, 2021 by Anahata

[Anahata]

Start researching telepathy and there you go.

[Anahata]

Telepathic experimentation has been a very important aspect of my journey. 

Again, if you are serious about it and you find someone you can trust, with enough practice you can breakthrough while sober as well, in such a mind boggling way that you need to integrate the realization the same way you integrate a dmt breakthrough. It can be so shocking at first that it might leave you perplexed, it can be extremely mind blowing, you might cry like a baby in awe. 

Another important thing I wanna mention is that speaking from my experience, lsd is perfect for telepathic play. 

If you let your imagination wild, the both of you, the realization of oneness might open some doors. 

Try it out ?

Edited May 30, 2021 by Anahata

[Vignan]

Thank you @Anahata how long did it for you to all master telepathy and how did you know telepathy is the key to integrate?

[Anahata]

Just now, Vignan said:

Thank you @Anahata how long did it for you to all master telepathy and how did you know telepathy is the key to integrate?

I started experimenting with telepathy since 16 years of age. I am 26 now.

[Anahata]

@Vignan This has been an important part of my path so I speak from direct experience but you have to verify it for yourself. I do not guarantee it works for everyone. People are very different in terms of 'extrasensory' inclinations. I might have a natural inclination towards this whereas someone else may not. Experimenting is key, not a specific tool. 

[Gili Trawangan]

Just give it time. Integration is just time, take it easy for the next few weeks/months.

[Anahata]

Just now, Vignan said:

How do I do it?

If this really help then I need to develop

The best way is to find a good psychic for this and do it 'professionally'.

[erik8lrl]

You can't maintain God-consciousness in the human state. Reality literally breaks down in higher states. Take it slow, and just be in the state you are in now and integrate everything. Tho you have a glimpse of higher states of consciousness, it seems that your baseline is not affected by that experience. You still perceive your current direct experience through your ego only. If you are more aware, you will experience your existence through both your ego and God at the same time. There are more to become aware of after this point. When you reach better integration of the experience, you will gain more clarity.   

[Vignan]

3 minutes ago, erik8lrl said:

You can't maintain God-consciousness in the human state. Reality literally breaks down in higher states. Take it slow, and just be in the state you are in now and integrate everything. Tho you have a glimpse of higher states of consciousness, it seems that your baseline is not affected by that experience. You still perceive your current direct experience through your ego only. If you are more aware, you will experience your existence through both your ego and God at the same time. There are more to become aware of after this point. When you reach better integration of the experience, you will gain more clarity.   

Can I do it without psychedelics for sometime? Right now I need to focus on my life purpose and parallely balance the learning I had. For me rn psychedelics feels so intense that i need to give it a break to be honest. @Anahatasuggested telepathy l. What else you think worked or atleast worth experimenting?

[erik8lrl]

@Vignan Follow your heart. Stop doing psychedelics if you feel you don't need to. Just live life and enjoy, existence is literally God and love. 

If you want integration, meditation/just being is good for grounding your consciousness. You might still get to higher states naturally sometimes due to some chemicals that are still active in your brain. But just surrender. Surrender to existence and you will be fine. It's all love anyway.   

[Flowerfaeiry]

2 hours ago, Vignan said:

i dont understand why just 100ug LSD took me soo far and just this is my 1st Actual trip. 

Sometimes people are just more sensitive to psychedelics. Could also be related to your emotional state before tripping and even if you hadn't eaten much that day. Sounds like you were simply very open to the experience.

Quote

3. Now after the trip I am in a state of crisis. i read the book TOE and bagavad gita and realised that I have reached the true, pure absolute infinity. But as i am back to my ego self i longer can understand what happened to me and i am in a state of confusion what happened to me is real or not. Leos recent God video makes absolute sense and now I don know how do I carry it with me in sobriety. How do I keep the learning? Now I have no thoughts whatsoever my mind is so calm that im unable to do anything. i became like a dead person yet many things running inside me. I realised my life purpose and dont no now how do i proceed. I need give my love and good to this humaninity. I want to make everyone happy and help them reach their true self.

Don't worry about figuring out if the experience was real or not. Start exploring about how to actualize your life purpose. That sounds like it was a big part of the trip. I think you had some good realizations. You don't have to figure it out all at once. Be kind to yourself, integration does take time. 

[erik8lrl]

What's happening to you is that you are awake but don't have the necessary knowledge to understand your own awakening. If you went all the way, you would know that you are literally everything/nothing. No matter what happens, you are what you are, and you will never be anything else. This should liberate you as God to enjoy life fully, instead of trying to understand your awakening through your ego's lens. Of course, life seems so restricted and empty to your ego compared to infinite love in God-consciousness. But don't forget this is God too, your ego's experience is God, and it will never be anything else. So raise your baseline awareness/consciousness and experience existence as God/ego, and then you will feel better. 

[Anahata]

Just now, Vignan said:

How do I maintain that level of consciousness while im not tripping?

In my experience, kundalini awakening is key. Once it reaches Sahasrara you will stop feeling human, your state of consciousness will get so highly advanced & purified that you'll constantly feel like walking Love. 

[Adamq8]

Nice report  

It is perfectly normal to feel weird after an awakening experience, it is a major thing in ones life to wake up.

It is also normal to doubt or to not fathom what happend at the trip, it takes time to integrate and to contemplate what happend and so forth, but as you get used to this kinds of "states" the more understanding happens and it becomes smoothful more and more.

Take some break and just be now and do normal stuff and contemplate this experience and life in general but not to much since it can cause some distress, but it is nothing to worry about, you got a good community here who can help out and help you with your questions.

Take it easy and be safe mate and we are here for you if needed