I don't like to be masculine

[Max Green]

Hi there!

How can i enjoy being masculine? I never enjoyed it. I am a creative person - i love to paint and to play a piano, but i don't feel like i need to "penetrate the world" as Leo said in one of his videos. I just like to play piano for myself and for the pretty women beside me. But, ofcourse, as a women, she wants me to penetrate not only her, but the world as well. I can't do both. I mean, i enjoy sex, but only if she's in charge  In fact, i can last long enough only when she's on top and i'm lying down relaxed and surrendered. When i'm on top or behind her i cum immediately.

And it's interesting that i like seeing other man being rough and super-dominant in sex (when i watching porn).

Any advice?

[egoeimai]

You don't have to be masculine. Embrace your uniqueness. 

Ps you kinda look like Leo  lol

[Max Green]

@egoeimai the problem is that my women asks me to fuck her, but i can't. She's great, i love her. But she's suffering without a proper fuck and i can't give it to her. And i even offered her to find second partner for sex, but she tells she can't do this - she wants one man to cover all her needs.

[Shin]

Seems like you have a feminine mind inside a masculine body.

You need a companion that has a masculine mind in a female body.

Both are rare (compared to the norm), but once you find a woman like that with whom you click it's gonna be amazing my dude

Edited May 23, 2021 by Shin

[Roy]

12 minutes ago, Max Green said:

the problem is that my women asks me to fuck her, but i can't. She's great, i love her. But she's suffering without a proper fuck and i can't give it to her. And i even offered her to find second partner for sex, but she tells she can't do this - she wants one man to cover all her needs.

That is a compatibility issue, you might have been better off finding a lower energy, calmer woman.

Anyways while being authentic is important, in a way it can also be a subtle form of selfishness. Contemplate this.

Sometimes in life you are required to "step" into certain "roles" for a short amount of time. This isn't necessarily being inauthentic. It's more of a sign of a balanced person. Be masculine when you need to be.

You won't always enjoy these times, too bad! That's part of the challenge of living and developing.

Edited May 23, 2021 by Roy

[Harlen Kelly]

@Peter Miklis Why is being masculine not pleasant?

[RedLine]

masculine shadow, of course you don´t like it because it is a shadow

 

work on it

[Max Green]

45 minutes ago, Roy said:

That is a compatibility issue, you might have been better off finding a lower energy, calmer woman.

I'm pretty attracted to that kind of woman but they're typically expecting a male to approach them, not vise versa. They're too shy and feminine to initiate interaction. And i'm not masculine enough to initiate it myself  

 

[Max Green]

@RedLine interesting. Can you describe it a little bit more detailed please? Maybe some advice, related videos, books, articles?

[Heart of Space]

I love masculinity, but am extremely feminine.  You can be whatever you want to be!  Be yourself!  ?

[ivankiss]

Can relate.

I'd say that most of the times I feel feminine on the inside but look masculine on the outside - if you know what I mean.

I achieved a certain level of balance. I like it.

It is precisely because I am comfortable with all them girly feelings that I can appear as a confident, steady and strong individual.

I do want to explore and deeper integrate my masculinity. I intend doing that by practicing random macho stuff. Maybe I'll buy a cool muscle car, or a Harley. Grow a nice beard. Pack some muscle. Drink fine whiskey and smoke expensive cigars. Listen to smooth jazz. Maybe even shoot from a gun..

You feel me.

[bejapuskas]

@Max Green  Thank you for opening up this topic, it is very important that we discuss this on a forum where masculinity is so dominant.

I think you are totally fine, if that's what you like, don't feel pressured to do something some people on a forum or a guy on a screen tell you to do.

Take it as an opportunity to develop deeper, more intimate communication and sense of connection with your partner.

But if you really care about pleasing her and are just worried about appearing as violent or cruel, perhaps because of some experience with hyper-masculine, aggressive men, try changing your view of this. Maybe you can use your submisiveness and niceness to learn how to listen to and serve her better and kind of do something just for her. Not because you are desperate, but out of care. Do you know what I mean? 

if you are just disgusted by the idea of being aggressive, understand that she might want you to fuck her fast and hard. It is not necessarily "violent"

[universe]

So you consider the positions in which you climax easily to be the ones you don't enjoy? Hmm.

If you want to start to enjoy your masculine side you could explore it in different avenues in your life. Not only while playing instruments. See how it feels.

[RedLine]

1 hour ago, Max Green said:

@RedLine interesting. Can you describe it a little bit more detailed please? Maybe some advice, related videos, books, articles?

search "shadow work" in the forum searcher, you will find a lot of stuff

Also, Elliot Hulse is the man.

[Roy]

1 hour ago, Max Green said:

I'm pretty attracted to that kind of woman but they're typically expecting a male to approach them, not vise versa. They're too shy and feminine to initiate interaction. And i'm not masculine enough to initiate it myself  

Hmm sorry to put it this way, my intention isn't to be overly harsh at all when I say this but - 

You can't have your cake, and eat it too.

[Harlen Kelly]

@Roy Bingo

[Roy]

@Max Green With that particular kind of woman you don't even need to be THAT masculine to attract her. She isn't looking for fucking Dwyane Johnson to swoop in and pick her up with one hand lol.

Personally I'm not even that masculine comparatively in my own gender, but I know when to apply it and I don't neglect it. So if I do want to attract that kind of women I can pull that out of my "bag" so to speak, and get the job done. There is no reason you can't do that either even if you are very "feminine" like you say.

I think you're scared and have the false assumption that you need to completely change and go to the other side of the pendulum, and become this sunglass pop-T wearing douche so you can provide what she might want. This isn't the case, that's actually a messy and reckless way to do it. What is important is recognizing what it takes to become a healthy developed person, and adequately working on your weak spots so they don't hold you back.

A "real" man isn't someone who is purely traditionally masculine, it's a complete person who has leveled up all aspects, male & female, within themselves and is so secure within that that they cannot be shaken by the world or other people.

Edited May 23, 2021 by Roy

[Striving for more]

Just be yourself... 

[Consept]

If someone was hyper masculine, the advice theyd get is to integrate their feminine side. Similarly if you feel you're leaning quite far on the feminine side then you should integrate your masculine, it's really all about balance to become complete. 

Also like @universe commented, if you're busting quick in positions that you're dominant that would indicate that at least your body is more responsive to those positions. In general it's easier to last longer if the women's on top anyway so that's not indication of much. 

[egoeimai]

9 hours ago, Max Green said:

@egoeimai the problem is that my women asks me to fuck her, but i can't. She's great, i love her. But she's suffering without a proper fuck and i can't give it to her. And i even offered her to find second partner for sex, but she tells she can't do this - she wants one man to cover all her needs.

One man cannot cover all needs. That's the truth but I get what she means. Be yourself.