Is a vision what will get me out of backsliding?

[Jon_Bundesen]

I procrastinate a lot and it has got really bad I can't watch one self-help video without going on youtube to distract myself.

Also trying to release the resistance creates too much resistance for me to even try.

I feel frustrated and restless in my body because one part of me want's to change but another doesn't. This creates a lot of suffering so I just distract myself.

I watched Leo's video on a vision for the actualized life but I don't feel a strong motivation from that.

(BTW writing this from a depressed state so there maybe be some principles I'm missing Idk)

[NoSelfSelf]

Compeling vision can centrely help but having that much resistence you wont last for long it should be more enjoyable or say i wont do self help for some time and see if you come back to it forcing yourself that much is counterproductive imo...mybe you dont want to change and force yourself to do it...

[Jon_Bundesen]

@NoSelfSelf Like a properly mini-vacation

[Danioover9000]

   I was in a similar phase towards self help, with also procrastination. A vision towards some goal, or an over arching vision will help get most people out of backsliding, but until you learn to work with backsliding, it will still effect to some degree. Visions do help with generating motivation.

   I'm not sure if there would be a detailed explanation here about vision, without discussing life purpose course contents, so the best resources about vision are out there.

[Jon_Bundesen]

@Danioover9000 Yeah I also bought the life purpose course but the ego backlash and resistance are stopping me. 

Maybe I'm just expecting a magic pill solution that will bring back my motivation for self-help.

But I really feel like I can't get out of this backsliding state.

Was there any video(s) that really got you back on track or help you with counteracting the ego backlash?   

[SamC]

@Jon_Bundesen One thing that I have noticed is that I get a lot more motivation when I do something in some shape or form that aligns with my vision.

 

As an example, right now I am studying something I am not passionate about in order to attend the education I want and because of that, I feel my motivation disappearing. Then, yesterday and today I decided to study psychology and personal development which I love and that then makes me motivated to study more in the things that I am less interested in but will get me closer to the life I want to have.

 

So having a big vision is important, yes! But it´s also important to let yourself work on that vision/ that thing you enjoy.

Have you taken Leo´s L.P course? If you haven´t you´re missing out big time.

 

 

Edited May 19, 2021 by SamC

[bejapuskas]

Trying different things to figure out what you want and what your values are can help, because from your interests and values you can create vision, which makes it easier for you to make decisions that you are satisfied with.

[Danioover9000]

@Jon_Bundesen

57 minutes ago, Jon_Bundesen said:

@Danioover9000 Yeah I also bought the life purpose course but the ego backlash and resistance are stopping me. 

Maybe I'm just expecting a magic pill solution that will bring back my motivation for self-help.

But I really feel like I can't get out of this backsliding state.

Was there any video(s) that really got you back on track or help you with counteracting the ego backlash?   

   Well, in that case I could give unsolicited advice about improving your vision/visualization abilities. One way is to keep visualizing about an amazing life, with your life domains met. Also, do more specific visualizations that force you to layer more sensory information, like mental sounds and feelings. For example, while seeing what's possible with the over arching vision, you focus on say the fitness domain. Don't just see the results in your body or what appearance the tools look like, but also feel the texture of the weights you use, then the lightness/heaviness of the exercise tools you use, the music in the background, your cheering yourself up. The more you focus on the process, the more vivid it is in your mind, the easier it is to do the activities. 

[Jon_Bundesen]

@SamC Right now I'm still in school so I will try the technique to be more motivated to study. I have the life purpose course but feel unmotivated to do it.  

@bejapuskas Yeah I find that very true when I was working on the life purpose course I found my top ten values and after I had done the exercises I literally started to cry because they were so aligned with what I wanted. But now I become pissed and annoyed if I can't tap into that within one visualization. (Maybe that's a perfectionism problem)

@Danioover9000 Yeah, I also remember psycho cybernetics talking about how you should visualize every detail of that vision to get the most out of it.

[bejapuskas]

@Jon_Bundesen  Yeh I find that often the environment that you create around yourself can pull you down. Leo talks about this in terms of spiral dynamics, how society helps you to reach a stage very fast but then slows you down as you evolve above that stage. For example when I was in our isolated school campus in India full of hippies, it was much easier to keep the young spirit going, but then when I came back home it became harder with more responsibilities and people around who are not as lively. It really is an all time active process and if you are serious, it never stops, maybe with death, but you can still leave certain things behind you.

Try finding a community of motivated people around your area who are aligned with your life purpose. For example I was thinking of starting a student movement that would go against the education system and media, which are very west-centric and xenophobic in my country. But actually somebody did that for me while I was in India so now I am trying to join them in what they are doing and contribute the best I can. Perhaps something like that is also around where you live.

[Jon_Bundesen]

@bejapuskas I doubt there is and I haven't found what I'm into yet only the values like leadership, contribution, and so forth.

[Spence94]

Consider where you are in life, how old you are and in what Stage of life. Not that you can't develop a strong vision at any age or stage but sometimes procrastination and a lack of vision is sometimes because we haven't had enough life real life experience that makes the vision we wanna buy in mto truly feel meaningful, its feels more like a vague wish and some thing we are doing because "thats what we gotta do to live a meaningful life" and no matter how much we try it we just can't seem to make it real. Then life give us a few knocks and we go out and live a little and then the vision becomes more real for us, more important, more associated with our own life and our own experience and we get more more motivated to make a difference in the world because its personal for us. The other advice here is all solid, but maybe you need time and to be patient with yourself. Maybe absorbing in lots of personal development type content is what you need at this stage, maybe your vision and motivation will solidify later down the road. I don't know.

Edited May 23, 2021 by Spence94

[Jon_Bundesen]

@sda I feel like my ego will use that opportunity to slack off and backslide even more. So when I have taken the two days off I will not do the work to overcome resistance.

@Spence94  I 15 and experiencing properly my worst ego backlash it even feels kinda good to slack off and do instant gratification stuff  (I'm watching Setting Proper Expectations by Leo Gura hopefully that can help me) 

[Jon_Bundesen]

@sda I'll try

[cupe]

Get off social media and stop frying your brain with excessive dopamine. 

Then, DO. Get out there in the world and start working. Do what's in front of you.

Take action and you'll find what you want to do.

Nobody "finds their purpose" one day after being lazy for their entire life, and then became an insane worker and turned into a billionaire in two years. 

Your vision is created with life experience. You don't get a vision lying in bed watching YouTube.

[Spence94]

2 hours ago, cupe said:

Your vision is created with life experience.

@cupe  Yes. 

@Jon_Bundesen You're 15? Dude, that's super cool you are into Actualized.org and self actualization at such a young age but @cupe is right. Go out, do things, live, travel after school, meet people, hobbies, experience, life, and i would say still listen leo and other teachers but don't get hung up on figuring it all out. I started my journey at 21, and for the frist 3/4 years i travelled, tried different jobs, had relationships, had fun, went on retreats, read books and listened to a lot of actualized.org and other teachers, i tried so hard to figure it out but in hindsight i needed to chill the fuck out and live more and enjoy that process of exploration. Life will give you everything you need and when one chapter ends and the next begins, the experience of life will solidify a vision for you and your discipline and focus will become stronger over time.

Stop thinking each actualized.org  video is the missing piece you need and hoping that the next video you watch will be the one that finally gives you that "aha" moment where everything clicks and it all makes sense and your life flows effortlessly from now until you're dead, it won't happen.

I am not saying don't put effort into life, i'm not saying don't aspire to self actualize, but chill out and enjoy  and "live the experience of your life with an open heart", as my teacher told me after i left home and went travelling.

Good luck brother!

 

Edited May 26, 2021 by Spence94

[Jon_Bundesen]

@cupe

@Spence94

So true