Zion

Is getting to know someone the best way to connect with them?

4 posts in this topic

Is getting to know someone the best way to connect with them?

If so, why?

If not, why? What are other ways of connecting deeply with someone? 

What are your thoughts?

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It's pretty hard to connect deeply with someone if you aren't physically with them. Just ask all the people using zoom to stay in touch with their families.

I recommend working on interpersonal and communication skills if you want to connect more deeply with people.

Some ways of improving these skills:

-Study Pick Up

-Study Charisma

-Study Body Language

-Study Leadership (Leaders can create the most change and can connect with the most people)

-Practice Self-Love 

 

Some other ways to connect with people:

Humor

Honesty

Being present

Having integrity

Being selfless

Being a good listener

Being a leader or mentor

Being genuinely interested in people

Creating and then being yourself passionately (through purpose, personality, hobbies...)

Shared experience (whether it be through difficulty, adventure, or fun)

 

The more comfortable you are with yourself, the more comfortable others will be around you, the more they will be willing to connect and open up to you.

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i'd say yeah spending time together in person is the best way to get to know someone

we're social creatures after all, so much is lost through technology

as for some good ways to connect -

  • doing all sorts of different things together
  • asking open-ended, creative, thought-provoking questions
  • being as fearlessly authentic as possible
  • consciously listening to what they have to say & considering where they're coming from
Edited by Regan

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@Zion I would contemplate deeply what it means to connect with someone. We are connecting right now as you read this. It's one of your values to connect with people and understand what 'connection' means. my answer provides the connection through which I try to provide value to you. The quality of our connection here is determined by how friendly and warm I seem, and how much actual value you perceive in my answer. What I'm saying is that every human has different values & desires and to connect with someone is to connect with their values and desires, as I do right now with you. For example, you can walk down the street and you pass a girl that is a bit shy and insecure. If you go up to her and tell her that she is beautiful, you will connect to that which she values: A compliment to stimulate her self-image; This is a quality connection. Let's say you go up to her and insult her. She already feels insecure so that would mean a big disconnect. Another person might value intellectually stimulating conversations, and so if you can provide them with that, you are connecting to their values/desires. 

You can connect in very small ways, for example giving out compliments, having fun and enjoyable conversations with people. Most people are open to have fun & light conversations. These are universal values of most people. If you do these, you can connect to them in small ways. To connect in a deeper way is to understand the other person deeply and become one with some part of them.

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