My first ever Mushroom trip

[AnthonyR]

I’d like to start this off by mentioning that I’m a 40 year old dude who has never before done any substances before not even weed.  So this is my first ever experience on a single gram of mushroom, and BOY-OH-BOY !! WHAT AN EXPERIENCE IT WAS !! So I hope you enjoy this trip as much as I did. I should add that I’m a fairly skinny individual; I probably weight around 125/130 pounds and I’m 5’7 - So that may be the reason why just a single gram had this effect on me. Having no trip experience before, I really did not know what to expect.  

Few other things to mention before I start; and all this is important to give you an idea of where I live (for set and setting) - I live on the 33rd floor of a high rise with large windows with an unobstructed south facing views of the city, with lake Ontario visible far off in the distance.  There’s a park directly beneath my building (visible to me) with a few other buildings in the vicinity.

I was mainly in the living room of my condo unit during this experience.  I have a large 60 inch 4K TV (this too is important to mention) situated a few feet in front of the sofa in my living room.

Last thing to mention is that I’m a photographer by profession, that started as a hobby where I mostly photographed in nature.  So my love for nature and photography go hand in hand.

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So I took the 1 gram mushroom dose in tea form that I steeped and drank within a span of 15/20 mins as I switched on the TV to YouTube, and was watching and listening to some clips of Leos (the new short clips, he recently released) on YouTube. 

Onset:

As the mushroom starts to take effect; at first I don’t quite like the experience.  I feel light headed, sort of nauseated like I’m drunk, so I sit back on the sofa cross legged with an off white blanket wrapped around me. For some reason I can’t stand listening to Leo anymore, so I use the remote to switch to something else, and this is only because of the dizziness I started to experience on the onset.  I did a search for “Nature 4K” on YouTube and clicked on a video of a rushing waterfall in a forest thumbnail that was one of the results that came up.  Best fukin video ever!! and I’m so glad I clicked on this one.  (I've added the link below)

A few mins into the onset and now I’m starting to feel funny. And I literally mean funny.  At first it started with a few random giggles that slowly started to escalate into full blown hysterical fits of laughter for no apparent reason.  This surprised me.  After-all I had no reason to laugh, unless I'm seeing something funny or someone told me a hilarious joke.  But not while just watching a 4K nature video play out on the TV.

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The Magical Forest:

The laughter now started to come in waves.  I just felt like laughing and so I let loose and just laughed my ass off for absolutely no apparent reason, as I walked through this incredible forest on my TV, while sitting of my sofa with a blanket wrapped around me.  I don't think I’ve ever laughed this hard.  It was fuckin Amazing !!

So I’m still watching this beautiful forest video, as the camera man is walking on this winding path through the forest, and I pretend it's me.  There's some beautiful music playing in the background of the video, it's green everywhere with a play of light and shadow, and slowly I'm starting to realize how amazing this forest looks.  Almost Heavenly.  I tell myself there is no way such a beautiful forest exists on this planet.  It's like another world, like a new planet that we discovered recently, with such an amazing blend of colors and greens and light.  I could see myself living there, like a woodland creature, and I’d be the happiest person ever, just to be there. 

The fits of laughter I was having continued, as I kept walking through this Ethereal forest, completely taken in by its beauty.  In some of the scenes I was walking through this muddy slushy area of the forest, that I would normally try to avoid these areas if I was actually there, but suddenly it all seemed perfect.  It was perfect just as it was. The slushy mud, the toppled down and uprooted trees.  There were no longer any imperfections in this forest that I would usually try to avoid photographing.  But now it all seemed indescribably perfect, like this was heaven.  This was definitely heaven.  Such a beautiful forest could not exist here on earth.  I kept laughing and telling myself how beautiful it was and I wish I was actually there with my camera to capture how beautiful it was.  I was envious of this cameraman who got to experience this first-hand.  

By now I was laughing so much I had tears streaming down my face.  I was laughing at what I was feeling; waves of happy euphoria. I was laughing at how beautiful nature is, the way the sunlight touched the ferns and reflected in a dazzling blend of greens and yellow and wood and dirt and it was all magical and beautiful and ethereal and heavenly.

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The Grand Chasms:

A few more mins in … maybe 30 mins in the laughter started to die down, but the smile on my face stayed on.  I was gleefully grinning like a kid on Christmas morning knowing he is going to be opening up his presents.  The dizziness I was feeling started to go away as well.  But I knew I wasn’t fully steady, so I remained seated on the sofa, and I got more comfortable in my seating.  I’m still watching the video, cause I’m completely entranced and caught up in the mesmerizing nature of this forest, when I started to notice that the ground and grassy area of the forest seemed to move and come alive. So I moved my eyes away from the screen for a bit and looked at the blanket that was wrapped around me.  This blanket was just an ordinary wooly type blanket that I use when I’m usually meditating daily.  But now it didn’t seem so ordinary anymore.  Since I had my knees folded up to my chest with the blanket around me, I could clearly see the neatly woven lines of yarn of the blanket that rose up.  Normally this is not something anyone would notice, its just a fuckin blanket for petes sake.  But now suddenly these stood out like chasms, like I was literally staring into another landscape in another world.  As the blanket morphed itself around the curves of my legs, it seemed to take on another worldly quality, like an entire land mass was resting around my body.  And as the soft wooly bits of yarn rose up and out of the blanket they seemed like tall trees and land masses with mountains and valleys, that someone like myself could shrink into and get lost into another blanket world.  This thought and the clarity of the experience blew me away !!  I looked away from the blanket back to the forest on my TV screen still playing the background and paused the video.  But as the image stayed paused on this beautiful scene, it took on a three dimensional quality of depth, and it seemed like the video was still playing, like the ferns and leaves were moving.  I looked at my ceiling, and suddenly I was transported into another world again.

The ceiling in my condo is called a “popcorn ceiling” if you’re not familiar with the term then look it up.  I hate how it looks because it's not like a normal smooth plain ceiling, but rough and jagged like someone took some white chunky peanut butter and spread it out across the ceiling.  Apparently it helps with keeping noise down between floors.

So I look up at the ceiling and suddenly the rough texture took on a whole otherworldly quality.  Just like the vast rocky mountains in my blanket, the ceiling transports me into another grand canyon of gorges and deep clefts, and again I felt like I could shrink down into this tiny ant sized human and explore my ceiling for days and I would wander between mountains and valleys carved out between these huge boulder sized chunks of chalk and styrofoam.  I kept staring at the ceiling and it seemed to morph and blend into these tiny honeycomb like crevices.  This ceiling that I always ignored and disliked, now seemed almost otherworldly and an invitation for exploration.

By now I of course figured out that my senses were starting to sharpen, as I’ve read from other people experiences.  So I took my hand out from under the blanket and bought it close to my face, and BHAM !! Another fucking world to explore !!

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Heightened Sense Perceptions:

As I looked at my hand, I started to see it in a whole new light.  Every ridge of my fingers stood out tack sharp, like I’ve never ever seen it before.  I could clearly see the fingerprints on the tip of my fingers, every single curve and ridge and arch and loop, stood out like mountain ridges that ran for miles across my hand and my fingers, like some satellite imagery from space.  This was literally another fucking world.  MY HAND WAS ANOTHER FUCKIN WORLD, ANOTHER CONTINENT !!! Again I’m blown away by what I’m seeing in my own fuckin hand, like I could literally take a spaceship and fly deep down into palm of my hand and explore another world.  As I looked closer I had a sense of aliveness within my hands.  Like every single millimeter of it had some form of secret alien life within it that was working and shaping my hand and carving out these lines and ridges and exploring them !! GOOD GOD !!  (I started to understand why Leo keeps talking about looking at your hand and experiencing it for what it is)

By now I’m completely immersed into the whole experience.  I’m smiling, I’m happy inside, I’m experiencing this brand new level of immersion and depth that almost seems dream-like, but so very real, that I was just not sure what to make of all of this.  I started to understand now. Finally !!! There's the waking state, there’s the dreaming state, and then there is this strange psychedelic state - strange for me, but I’m sure quite normal of some who have experienced it many times.  This was new to me and I was fuckin loving every moment of it.

By now I was feeling less light headed, but also excited to explore.  It's like anything and everything I looked at with a noticeable texture reminded me of another world.  I was literally seeing whole undiscovered regions and continents  within my own living room.  

I decided to get up and look out my window, and oh man !! What can I say?  I wasn’t on fuckin Earth anymore.  It’s like without realizing it I had walked into a parallel universe that opened up inside my living room.  As I looked out my window, I almost felt like crying.  Everything was as it was.  The buildings were there, the park was there, the cars zipping by, but the play of light and colors, made it feel completely different. I know that it was just my own vision and perception that was heightened, but the way the light danced outside my window, it was as if daylight took shape and form and danced around the buildings and on the park, over the lake and in the distance.  Like it was a happy light and it was glad to show off its colors as it reflected and moved through the trees and the buildings and road.  I stared outside the window for a while completely baffled and mesmerized by how everything looked.  But more important than that was how I was feeling at the same time.  I was feeling happy and light-hearted.  I had this feeling that everything was going to be okay and I had absolutely nothing to worry about. 

A storm was brewing in the distance as I was taking in this whole scene out my window and I was telling myself that this had to be the most beautiful storm system I had ever seen in my life.  So I pulled out my phone and placed it on the window sill and did a time-lapse video of the event with the camera looking out the window (I still have that video, showing the storm clouds moving across the sky).

By now I started to feel some hunger come on. I had some snacks that I thought I’d eat, this was basically some cashews and pistachios.  And as I was tasting these nuts, it tasted like the most delicious cashews and pistachios I’ve ever tasted.  It tasted the same, but the taste was heightened ten fold.  I also had a packet of some left over chips and I bought those out and I looked at this one chip and again I’m seeing the texture of this chip like its a whole continent that need to be explored, and I put this continental chip in my mouth and bit into it and the flavor was so intense, I had to sigh in pleasure.

But now I was over an hour and half into the experience and I was feeling that it was starting to wear off, which was disappointing, because I was really enjoying the experience and wanted it to last forever.

So there you have it.  I realize that there was no mystical experience, as it was mainly visual and experiential in the sense that I was happy as I've ever been in my life.

I have some questions that I hope some of you more experienced can answer:

1) I have two more tea bags and was wondering if I should just do a 2 grams, next time (steep both tea bags) - I'm not sure how intense that would be for me, given that I live on my own?

2) How do I minimize the nauseated feeling on the Onset?

3) What else can you recommend I do during the trip to intensify the experience?

Thanks for reading

YouTube vid I was watching during the trip:

 

Edited May 14, 2021 by AnthonyR

[Leo Gura]

5 minutes ago, AnthonyR said:

I realize that there was no mystical experience

That was the mystical experience! You silly goose.

ALL experience is mystical experience -- if you stop taking it for granted.

[AnthonyR]

7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

That was the mystical experience! You silly goose.

ALL experience is mystical experience -- if you stop taking it for granted.

Noted !!.  if a gram can have this much effect.  I can't imagine what a higher dose would do

[RendHeaven]

32 minutes ago, AnthonyR said:

1) I have two more tea bags and was wondering if I should just do a 2 grams, next time (steep both tea bags) - I'm not sure how intense that would be for me, given that I live on my own?

2) How do I minimize the nauseated feeling on the Onset?

3) What else can you recommend I do during the trip to intensify the experience?

1) Yes, just go for the 2g!

2) Personally, sitting and breathing with an open mouth helps. Standing or Lying down makes it worse. Also fast for a few hours beforehand.

3) For me, I've noticed that mushrooms help dissolve whatever I place my focus on.

So, if you exclusively focusing on "outwards appearances" - that is exactly what will twist and warp. Nothing wrong with that, but that's still a very surface-level "dissolving"

Try focusing on your your own mental concepts - and you'll notice them begin to twist and warp.

Here's a fun one: Where do "you" end, and the "world out there" begins? Normally, you'd think that the line is at the outer layer of your body's skin. Next time you're on shrooms, just hold your attention on this concept. Don't overthink it. Don't try to achieve anything. Just hold that concept steady. The shroom will melt it for you.

Another one: How do you know that there is anything outside of your door, once you've closed the door? Hold your attention on that concept. Don't overthink it. The shroom will melt it for you.

Another one: How do you know that "physical" and "mental" aspects of reality are mutually exclusive and distinct categories? Hold your attention on that concept. Don't overthink it. The shroom will melt it for you.

What are "other people?" Who are you? Hold your attention on these questions. Don't overthink it. Be open to any and all answers.

To really tap into these deeper layers of deconstruction and insight though, you'll have to give up distracting activities. No 4k videos, music, food, or any other flashy appearances.

Be willing to just sit there in silent exploration.

It may also be helpful to watch this video sober first (again, even if you've already seen it)

 

Edited May 14, 2021 by RendHeaven

[Inliytened1]

@AnthonyR that was beautiful man, and beautifully written as well..  as I was reading it I could literally feel how things just came alive for you, blossoming with life and love - each distinct part blooming into a whole universe in itself.   That is the beautiful nature of Infinity.  

[AnthonyR]

2 hours ago, RendHeaven said:

3) For me, I've noticed that mushrooms help dissolve whatever I place my focus on.

Thanks for the pointers.  I will give these thought experiments a go on my next one. 

Can’t remember if I watched that episode, but will listen to it. 

Thanks