I'm in a hardcore 'artistic crisis'. Help?

[seeking_brilliance]

36 minutes ago, ivankiss said:

@WaveInTheOcean Lovely! Thank you!

Yes. But no. ?

Exploring is wonderful. And in a sense; it's forever. But you could be out on the vast, endless ocean - not knowing where the wind might take you... yes you might stumble upon a lot of beauty.. but that's different from learning how to navigate the waters and actually get to a land you'd like to see and explore.  Feel me? ?

Have you landed yet? 

[ivankiss]

@seeking_brilliance Been a while since I last did... But yes. Definitely.

Right now tho; I'm out in the open and not sure where to steer the ship next. 

I know there is a 'genre' or 'style' out there - or in here - that I never really heard before and that I've been searching for all this time.

I'll know when I hear it.

[seeking_brilliance]

Sometimes with writing, I also don't identify with a certain genre. So I make one up. It's very freeing to know all the rules, but not bound to follow any of them. Who knows maybe the island of 'Kiss' will just pop up out of nowhere. 

(except one rule : it must be pleasing to society's ear. Perhaps that is the ocean on which we sail. The instrument, our vessel.) 

Edited May 16, 2021 by seeking_brilliance

[seeking_brilliance]

[ivankiss]

@seeking_brilliance ? 

9 minutes ago, seeking_brilliance said:

So I make one up.

Bingo! That's exactly where I'm at right now. And that's kind of a process ?

[Nahm]

2 hours ago, ivankiss said:

Tried that - trust me. I ended up going down some weird hippy rabbit hole

And? 

Quit?

[ivankiss]

Check this out. It's an old project of mine that never really got to see the light of the day. I was in a mess while working on it. I failed utterly to release and market it properly. So I kinda left it there - as it was. Nearly no one knows abou it. But it means a world to me.

It's a journey filled with horror and delight. It was a catalyst to my highest awakening. And it never got the recognition it deserved. Because I lacked the skills and the resources. Cannot let that happen again.

I present you the most unique stuff I've created so far. Porcelain Safe - Note To Self;

 

[ivankiss]

5 minutes ago, Nahm said:

And? 

Quit?

Nope. Impossible.

Pause. Take a look around. Reorient.

Continue rocking out.

[Girzo]

11 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

It's very hard to drop something you're successful at to go back to square one with something you suck at. And as you get older, starting from scratch becomes harder and harder.

Ahh, that makes sense. I am only 23 yo and have already experienced this a few times when taking up new hobbies.

For example, I have prefered to stick to graphic design and internet marketing instead of learning CAD and electrical engineering, because the first one is proven for me to make money and the two jobs are actually similar in a meta sense, that is sitting in front of a PC and tinkering with schemes. The difference is I feel engineering offers some value while IM is dreadful, hah, but feeling bad at the new software and not having knowledge has been even more dreadful.

So, yeah, now I see it's a good advice. Personally, I think I should go straight at pursuing my passion, because I might fall in that trap again. Dunno about you, @ivankiss .

[ivankiss]

There is no question about it.

I'm getting that money and I'm investing it in myself and my passion. 

I'm going to travel, meet and collaborate with awesome people and live the dream I created for myself.

What I'm really lacking is that final ounce of certainty and confidence. And maybe some faith.

[ivankiss]

43 minutes ago, ZenRocker said:

BTw. what guitar rig do you use? Sounds pretty sick in parts like at 8:20 and 20:30

Thanks. I don't use it anymore. But I believe I recorded that with an Ibanez Tam10. The tone was created in Positive Grid Bias.

Still; I kinda messed it all up in the mixing stages. The production is quite messy. But the heart is there.

Edited May 16, 2021 by ivankiss

[Surfingthewave]

Thanks for this thread it's made me think about my own artistic practice. 

This is essentially every artist's conundrum. I self deceive myself in so many ways to protect myself from sitting down and making art (needing to do the 9 to 5 to make money etc)

If you can make music every day and let go of the outcome who cares about success - you're doing your passion, right, living your dream? Wrong, we chase success, fame and fortune and if we don't succeed it can impact our art. 

Making art is facing your fear every day, and sitting down and doing the work. Like spirituality we like to theorise and distract ourselves from the beauty that is. 

As an artist you have a duty to yourself and others to create. Make sure you don't give it up. 

 

Edited May 16, 2021 by Surfingthewave

[Leo Gura]

21 hours ago, ivankiss said:

Well I guess then it's just a risk I'm willing to take. 

I think a harmony between those two worlds can be established. They can coexist.

Well, that is exactly how I bootstrapped myself.

It can certainly work. But it ain't easy. I just like to make people aware of that before they embark. Newbies tend to have lots of fantasies about the road ahead.

[Nahm]

22 hours ago, ivankiss said:

What I'm really lacking is that final ounce of certainty and confidence. And maybe some faith.

All one in the same. Esther Hicks so casually refers to this as ‘nipping it in the bud’ but it could be said to be a very deep point. I’d look at it as if there where a year between the arising of the appearing of the thought “I’m really lacking”, and the awareness of the thought, and a year between the awareness of the thought and the vocalizing or communicating of the thought. With all that ‘space’, which you’ve commented on as stillness, the thought is ‘let go’ on day one (before the years). Hopefully that makes some sense. 

A ‘can’t go wrong’ way about it would be recognizing faith as absolute trust in what you can not ever see. There are also insightful passages in the Bible in this regard, like ‘God said let there be light and there was and it was Good’. Similarly, if you will, ‘God said let there be doubt, and there is’. God separates the light from the darkness / Ivankiss separates the light from the darkness (discord & alignment). Subtlety, sensitivity, yet not in any personal sense (convoluted by thought), in an extremely literal sense, is the way. The more the direct experience is ‘put first’ or intensely primary, the less ‘getting years back’ there is. 

[ivankiss]

@Surfingthewave Very nicely put. Thank you.

On 5/17/2021 at 10:06 AM, Leo Gura said:

Well, that is exactly how I bootstrapped myself.

It can certainly work. But it ain't easy. I just like to make people aware of that before they embark. Newbies tend to have lots of fantasies about the road ahead.

Been walking this path since I can remember. There is no other way for me. 

It's just that I'm trying my best to do things the smart way. I kinda had enough of learning through pain and suffering for a while now lol. 

Thank you for your guidance.

And thank you, dear @Nahm

Your words always catch up with me, gradually - over time. If you know what I mean. I hear the message right away, but the truth of it clicks in direct experience - when it does. It could also be said that what you say always makes perfect nonsense to me haha. In a very good way.

I know I'm on track. I feel it in my gut. I feel aligned and empowered. Kinda getting used to navigating the ship at this speed. Definitely can feel the acceleration.

Thank you all, once again. This place just keeps giving and giving. Pure awesomeness. I will not forget that.

Much love and respect.

[Applegarden8]

@ivankiss yes, i am going trough the same thing and have been going for quite a while, life has been dragging me in multiple directions right now.

[ivankiss]

@Applegarden8 Good thing we can be at multiple places at once 

Best of luck!

[Applegarden8]

On 5/23/2021 at 5:12 PM, ivankiss said:

@Applegarden8 Good thing we can be at multiple places at once 

Best of luck!

Well, best of luck to you too, however I can only respond to the rest of your statement in a language you may underestand better.

 

[ivankiss]

@Applegarden8 Haha dude! That tuning be low as hell!

Lovely chuggery! The dj0nt is strong within this one 

Keep it up!

[Applegarden8]

3 hours ago, ivankiss said:

@Applegarden8 Haha dude! That tuning be low as hell!

Lovely chuggery! The dj0nt is strong within this one 

Keep it up!

On 2021.05.16. at 3:18 PM, ivankiss said:

Check this out. It's an old project of mine that never really got to see the light of the day. I was in a mess while working on it. I failed utterly to release and market it properly. So I kinda left it there - as it was. Nearly no one knows abou it. But it means a world to me.

It's a journey filled with horror and delight. It was a catalyst to my highest awakening. And it never got the recognition it deserved. Because I lacked the skills and the resources. Cannot let that happen again.

I present you the most unique stuff I've created so far. Porcelain Safe - Note To Self;

 

Hey, hope I relieved you! Thanks for your feedback, it really means much to me. IMO, you shouldn't quit guitar or leave metal influence out of your playing. Or stop doing something because it seemed frustratinf at that time. I am acctually try to solve that exact problem by looking at it from various angles. How should my lifestyle be, to make such music, what are most efficient ways of doing it when I am with the instrument, what can you do without the instrument. How to keep consistency from the very basics, stabilizing how you feel or the amount of say you have in how you feel so you can choose more often. What are the best things to resolve to do creative work and how to. I will do series in my journal of making all of that as efficient as I can. Stay cool, keep calm!