Pickup Express

[Roy]

20 hours ago, StarStruck said:

She accepted the third date

The whole drama I created after me not kissing her on the second date was not needed. Her schedule became clear and she said she would like to do something on friday. I'm still not sure what I want to do with her. Probably pick her up with my car and give her a red rose. Drive her to get an ice cream and take a walk and then take her to my home to cook. She says she is a great cook. We could make something together.

Doesn't it feel like a huge relief when you realize a lot of the shit in our heads is just thin air that can leave in an instant ? The truth is if we are honest - we can't really predict the future, so why stress about it?

Just a tip if you find it useful: Don't worry too much about she wants to do, she said she'd like to do something (with you) on friday. Lead and come up with something that you really want to do so it's fun and you'll be at ease during the time and can therefore share that energy with her.

Have fun!

 

[StarStruck]

6 minutes ago, Roy said:

Doesn't it feel like a huge relief when you realize a lot of the shit in our heads is just thin air that can leave in an instant ? The truth is if we are honest - we can't really predict the future, so why stress about it?

Just a tip if you find it useful: She said she'd like to do something (with you) on friday. Lead and come up with something that you really want to do so it's fun and you'll be at ease during the time and can therefore share that energy with her.

Have fun!

 

I'm making huge shifts in paradigms. As a past incel it is not simple as "just don't believe your thoughts". There is a reason why incels are incels. They are very stubborn. I still can't believe she wants a date with me to be honest. She might cancel (real possibility) although last time I could clearly see she had feelings for me.

13 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

But isn't this guy just saying that you have to be good looking. Isn't this video just telling average & below people to quit?

How this video helpful? He's basically saying bad boys are just good looking & I don't think that makes sense, there's plenty of good looking "nice guys" or shy guys

Not all girls are obsessed with looks.

Edited June 16, 2021 by StarStruck

[Striving for more]

11 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

I'm making huge shifts in paradigms. As a past incel it is not simple as "just don't belief your thoughts". There is a reason why incels are incels. They are very stubborn.

Perhaps it's because the mind tends to hold on to negative experiences & thoughts & ignore the positive? 

Or an incel's mind ... , that's certainly how it is with me. It's like you're stuck with Incel OS & you want to boot to windows or mac. ** No, boot to CHAD OS LOL 

(Not that you necessarily need it, perhaps raw action will solve everything for you) but perhaps NLP & Affirmations will help. 

I've started an NLP / Affirmations / LOA practice ... Not that it can replace approaching of course. But maybe it helps. 

 

 

Edited June 16, 2021 by Striving for more

[StarStruck]

40 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

Perhaps it's because the mind tends to hold on to negative experiences & thoughts & ignore the positive? 

Or an incel's mind ... , that's certainly how it is with me. It's like you're stuck with Incel OS & you want to boot to windows or mac. ** No, boot to CHAD OS LOL 

(Not that you necessarily need it, perhaps raw action will solve everything for you) but perhaps NLP & Affirmations will help. 

I've started an NLP / Affirmations / LOA practice ... Not that it can replace approaching of course. But maybe it helps. 

 

 

I need to find good NLP sources, books and programs. 

Currently I'm just suffering. She could cancel our third date and there is nothing that stops her doing that. 

I'm really unconscious why that is but probably I'm afraid that if she rejects me it will prove that I'm still an incel and not worthy of a gf. 

Only solution seems to be this: massive action, and massive experience. Dating a lot of girls. Getting rejection a lot until one develops antifragility. 

[Striving for more]

12 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Currently I'm just suffering. She could cancel our third date and there is nothing that stops her doing that. 

I'm afraid that if she rejects me it will prove that I'm still an incel and not worthy of a gf. 

This is your ingrained subconscious trying to keep you stuck, the mind doesn't want you to change your life & identity.... But your soul does, side with the soul. 

Go & approach many other women, abundance. Try & forget about her & act like you don't give a shit for now. These negative sensations are just a trick. 

Also, it proves nothing. There could a thousand reasons why she flakes, it's not about you. 

(BTW, I feel a huge lack of integrity when I give you this advice ... because I am way further behind you on the journey, it's easier to say than to embody yourself of course). 

 

 

 

Edited June 17, 2021 by Striving for more

[Striving for more]

12 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I need to find good NLP sources, books and programs. . 

Yes ... me too. 

Need the highest quality teacher/program, who has positive results & reviews & a style that resonates with me, so I know it's not a waste. 

I've been listening to "The unapologetic man podcast" recently : Don't agree with everything he says ... (seems bit too hung up on gender roles) but his NLP stuff is decent. 

[StarStruck]

Additional insights about game after yesterday (thanks to Polish girl)

• Game is really done from feelings. The moment you get in your head. She gets in her head and logic is a killer for attraction. Feelings are a catalyst for game. Game is really like surfing on waters and balancing. 
• Another aspect of game is planning ahead in a conversation. You don't want to plan everything out. Especially when you approach it is best to be lucid as possible but once you are in it is good to make a general plan in your head of the major points you want to hit within the framework of open-hook-vibe-close
• I noticed that game is muscle memory and slowly building that muscle. Game is really done with the unconscious. The only purpose of the conscious part of your brain is to set targets and priorities (this goes back to psycho cybernetics)  by surrendering to the unconscious (motions of the ocean of feelings) you really get places. When I look back to yesterday. I wouldn't have a banger approach if I was stuck up and a control freak. 
• Letting go of fear. Letting go of outcome dependence was another point. I was thinking: Friday I have a date with another girl so what does it matter if she rejects me. 
• Approaching out of principe. I approached to approach and nothing more than that. My motto is one approach per day keeps the doctor away. And nowadays I don't approach a lot but at least 1 approach per day.  
• I still have this softness, niceness, overreaching. I'm trying to be conscious of it and not suppress it. I'm not sure how to get rid of this. 

55 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

Yes ... me too. 

Need the highest quality teacher/program, who has positive results & reviews & a style that resonates with me, so I know it's not a waste. 

I've been listening to "The unapologetic man podcast" recently : Don't agree with everything he says ... (seems bit too hung up on gender roles) but his NLP stuff is decent. 

I will check it out. Thanks. 

1 hour ago, Striving for more said:

This is your ingrained subconscious trying to keep you stuck, the mind doesn't want you to change your life & identity.... But your soul does, side with the soul. 

Go & approach many other women, abundance. Try & forget about her & act like you don't give a shit for now. These negative sensations are just a trick. 

Also, it proves nothing. There could a thousand reasons why she flakes, it's not about you. 

(BTW, I feel a huge lack of integrity when I give you this advice ... because I am way further behind you on the journey, it's easier to say than to embody yourself of course). 

 

 

 

Actually it is good advice. Ego is fighting back and the suffering is just a way to make me stop in my track. It would have a better time if it just surrendered. 

[StarStruck]

Yesterday I met some Buddhists from India in the park. They invited me. It was kind of a weird encounter. They were fascinated by me because of my knowledge of spirituality and Buddhism in particular. I felt kind of weird. Next week invited to their picnic. I'm just going to go for the experience. 

Tomorrow I'm having my third date. I'm looking forward to it but also I'm nervous. I want things to go like I want but perhaps I should let things happen as they will happen. 

 

[StarStruck]

Tomorrow I have a date and I'm looking forward to it. At the same time I'm depressive because of nofap. 

I'm keep passing frontiers and I should be happy but I can't. I'm faced with my abusive past and the effects of those: my addictions, namely porn. 

I hope brighter days are ahead. Where I don't have to worry about porn induced erectile dysfunction. I don't want to die this way. I don't have forever to fix my issues. I'm preparing for death. 

God knows where this road will lead. I'm sitting in the park. The sun is shining. The birds are flying. Kids playing. And  I'm facing my inner demons in the midst of it. 

[StarStruck]

She canceled our third date few hours before it would happen. 

She says: "do you want to meet another time? I'm very tired, hot from the weather, and sick. I'm afraid I won't be cheerful with you today. :("

 

Hmmz. I'm so disappointed. I was looking forward to this date. 

Perhaps she is as nervous as me. I think she likes me. I could see her emotions last time. But part of me says she is just not going to see me again. 

I'm so tired of disappointment. I so want to stop. It just drains my energy too much. 

I feel like the universe is against me. 

[StarStruck]

Sadona method explained in this video can also be used to let go of heart break or can even be used with pickup to convince her of things

Can you allow yourself to feel the feeling? (Positive or negative)

Could I let this feeling go?

Would you allow it go?

When would allow it go?

[StarStruck]

3 hours ago, StarStruck said:

She canceled our third date few hours before it would happen. 

She says: "do you want to meet another time? I'm very tired, hot from the weather, and sick. I'm afraid I won't be cheerful with you today. :("

 

Hmmz. I'm so disappointed. I was looking forward to this date. 

Perhaps she is as nervous as me. I think she likes me. I could see her emotions last time. But part of me says she is just not going to see me again. 

I'm so tired of disappointment. I so want to stop. It just drains my energy too much. 

I feel like the universe is against me. 

So what you can read above happened earlier this day. I'm still bumped about it.  She might want to date next week or maybe not. It is so hard to read girl's signals. They give out mixed signals on purpose is what I found out. Especially this girl. It would have been our third girl and I can honestly say she might want to do our third date next week if you read how she responded, but you will never know with women. If she shows up, I will get my vengeance in bed.

She flaked on me so I went out to meet hotties

The moment she flaked on me. I decided to go to the city centre and talk to 5 girls. I think I talked to 6 girls. I'm much more confident and girls love that. Especially hot girls love when a guy comes up confident because most guys come up creepy, weird and unconfident and it is a change for them I think. My reason for approach was not to get another girl but to get out of my head. I got real depressive when she flaked on me. I was looking forward to it and I think I also fell in love with her. It just pains me that she prefers to sit at home right now rather to be with me. I decided to say fuck that and I went out to talk to girls.

Confident but not confident enough for the real hotties

The real hot girls usually have a boyfriend though or they say they have a boyfriend. My confidence is not 10/10 and I'm not doing good with 8/10 to 10/10 girls. One really needs flawless games. If there are some interruptions in the game or vibe is off in between, they just lose attraction, I can feel and I can pinpoint when girl lose attraction. When you are out of touch with feelings and get into your head she will get into her head too. Again: game is done through feelings, not through logic.

Almost all of my conversations were good. I just joked a lot and I wasn't serious. I wasn't outcome depended and I just had fun. Unfortunately the hot ones had bf's and the one girl that wasn't that hot didn't but everything was perfect besides the closing. I think I need to work on how I close sets. I close them very abrupt and I think I can do it a different way. Her excuse for not giving me her number was "I don't meet with guys that I meet on the street".

Give and take; in that order

When I talk to girls I notice they really like my confidence and vibe (the energetic vibe that I borrowed from my pickup friend). My problem is that I run out of things to say and I want to take from her on an energetic level. It is really creepy and weird. When I do this I feel like an emotional beggar and guess what? That is exactly what I'm. What I'm trying to do is to stop this automatic behavior of value sucking from the other. It is not easy because it is a habit. In the future, on an energetic level, I will try to give much more than I take from the girl; preferably 80% give / 20% take.

Asian fish on the hook

I got real nice convo with an Asian girl. She is really hot. She was waiting for a gf. I opened and hooked. Got her logistics. She said she had 13 minutes before her gf came. I said to my self "read, set, start". We vibed very well and I got her number. I sent her a msg afterwards and she seemed receptive. She told me she has a lot of exams and shit. I think I will keep hitting her up until her exams are over and then just go for a coffee date. That if she doesn't flake on me.

There is nothing to complain about

It is really stupid to complain about dating. It is what it is. The complaints from women are valid. The complaints of men are valid. Because I'm a men I will care about my own complaints, the same way women only care about their complaints and not care about men's complaints.

Women keep flaking on good men and they complain whey men are not loyal and can't commit to one woman. Now when I hear something like that I just laugh. Really, the only thing you can do is just laugh.

Women are highly unpredictable. Women are like nature while men are culture (quote from Jordan Peterson). I'm not going to commit to a girl for this reason. Time after time I get disappointed. I have to adapt to "nature" to survive. Thanks to women I stopped believing in love. I'm just going to think about my own interests, invest in myself, be ruthless as women, chose the best possible mate, and above all... do not trust women.

I feel a little better

After some action that I took today: I did 5-6 approaches and I feel a little better about that blonde girl that flaked on our third date. She told me she wasn't feeling well. I told her I hope she feels better soon. She didn't even take the time to write something back. Man, I don't want to say bad things. I even contemplated giving a red rose to this girl. I'm not trying to get angry. I'm just trying to learn the lessons. That is all what I can do.

[StarStruck]

On 16-6-2021 at 8:49 PM, Roy said:

Doesn't it feel like a huge relief when you realize a lot of the shit in our heads is just thin air that can leave in an instant ? The truth is if we are honest - we can't really predict the future, so why stress about it?

Just a tip if you find it useful: Don't worry too much about she wants to do, she said she'd like to do something (with you) on friday. Lead and come up with something that you really want to do so it's fun and you'll be at ease during the time and can therefore share that energy with her.

Have fun!

 

I guess it wasn't shit in my head. She really flaked on me today. I wrote about it above.

[Roy]

6 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I guess it wasn't shit in my head. She really flaked on me today. I wrote about it above.

She could genuinely be very tired from work and scorching weather. Which is not something you plan, you feel awful the day it happens. If you've ever felt exhausted and burnt out from heat then you know how awful it is.

You're only going to feel shitty thinking she's maliciously trying to test you. It's paranoid to worry about such stuff anyways, it's only a small % of psychopathic younger girls who do that sort of scheming and games. Most people are actually pretty decent people. They might make mistakes but they don't do shitty things like that.

And guess what? If she WAS that kind of girl you don't want her anyways. You dodged a bullet and can do better.

 

Either way the correct response is to be chill about it. Say something casual, "No worries, get hydrated and rest !" Sit back for a day or two, give her time to think about you > Then ask her if she's feeling better and suggest meeting (within 1-2 days ideally).

[Javfly33]

10 hours ago, StarStruck said:

It just pains me that she prefers to sit at home right now rather to be with me. 

Yeah right? Because what does thought tells about you?

It happens the same to me, it's totally a projection of our minds. 

[Javfly33]

10 hours ago, StarStruck said:

She didn't even take the time to write something back. 

Again, is that situation which makes you feel bad or is the thought about what does mean that feels bad?

"She didn't even took the time time to write me, that means that I am..." Complete the sentence in your mind. 

If you stop analysing the behaviour of women to you as a way of "proving" that you are X or Y, wouldn't that be an amazing relief? Try it. 

[StarStruck]

11 hours ago, Roy said:

She could genuinely be very tired from work and scorching weather. Which is not something you plan, you feel awful the day it happens. If you've ever felt exhausted and burnt out from heat then you know how awful it is.

That is what I was thinking. I just have to wait it out in order to make judgements. If she doesn't want to meet next week, it is safe to say my pessimism was right.

Quote

You're only going to feel shitty thinking she's maliciously trying to test you. It's paranoid to worry about such stuff anyways, it's only a small % of psychopathic younger girls who do that sort of scheming and games. Most people are actually pretty decent people. They might make mistakes but they don't do shitty things like that.

And guess what? If she WAS that kind of girl you don't want her anyways. You dodged a bullet and can do better.

Either way the correct response is to be chill about it. Say something casual, "No worries, get hydrated and rest !" Sit back for a day or two, give her time to think about you > Then ask her if she's feeling better and suggest meeting (within 1-2 days ideally).

That is true but I don't want to stay with her on the long term anyway. Perhaps short and mid term. If I messed it up by being a weasel and missed out on fun and sex it is my mistake. I'm just going to wait it out for couple of days.

6 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

Again, is that situation which makes you feel bad or is the thought about what does mean that feels bad?

"She didn't even took the time time to write me, that means that I am..." Complete the sentence in your mind. 

If you stop analysing the behaviour of women to you as a way of "proving" that you are X or Y, wouldn't that be an amazing relief? Try it. 

You hit the nail. I'm trying to stop making assumptions but it is hard to not do it. This video helped me a little bit:

This is a good book I should read:

• Attached Are you Anxious, Avoidant or Secure? How the science of adult attachment can help you find - and keep - love

Edited June 19, 2021 by StarStruck

[StarStruck]

I'm so much this guy: lmao

This is so true:

What love is about:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ricfZxjExt0

Not a lot is needed to get girls, I shouldn't make it a big deal:

 

[StarStruck]

After yesterday I just decided to have a lousy Saturday. I got drunk in the beginning of the afternoon. Hit the gym, talked to some people I know there, talk to a girl I know from the park, and went to the supermarket.

In the supermarket I saw 3 lovely ladies. I decided not to approach. I just wanted to observe myself. I noticed how I was a sad boy. Looking for attention and trying to be confident and assertive. I got sad. I was tipsy. I didn't need to approach. The emotions already had an impact on me.

My emotions told me that I won't live forever and that I should enjoy my youth and talk to as many hot girls as I like. For today though, I was just going to observe. I believe already took action enough this week.

Don't fear approaching. Fear time.

[StarStruck]

This thread helped me a lot with texting: it answered all my doubts, worries an insecurities.