How to deal with trolls?

[Preety_India]

@ll Ontology ll haha. I don't mean to do all that violent stuff. 

I am a gentle soul. Enough of your violent fantasies lol, you could freak me out right now.. 

I generally just tend to close up a lot when someone is deliberately going out of their way to disturb my peace or bother me excessively. 

At some point they invite me into the boxing ring by constantly pushing my buttons, that's when I finally decide to deal with them through and through. 

I am generally not a confrontational person. I keep too much to myself, way more than people think. 

 

[Preety_India]

@ll Ontology ll ok all these comments are kinda distracting me from focusing on what I should write here. 

I have very little time to fill journals and I need to hurry up to do my other stuff. 

If you want a casual chat or give feedback please pm me and I'm always glad to have great conversations whenever I find time. 

Thank you. ☚ 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Please no more comments on this journal. 

 

Thanks for respecting. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Will watch this later to gain some insight. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

One way of tackling trolls is to have great self confidence. 

Ironically trolls make you into a stronger more empowered person 

 

Not always though. 

Sometimes excessive trolling can take a huge dig at your self esteem especially when they target something vulnerable in your life. 

For example if you have had vulnerable spot in regard to having turbulent relationships with the opposite sex, the troll can feed on this detail 

A very common example of this is 

Let's say you're a man who has difficulty in attracting women 

A troll can say something like 

"you must be an incel. "

This can really go deep or sting badly and the troll will tell you to accept it as truth. 

However the objective was to simply make you feel bad about yourself.. 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Often times you might want to engage with a troll just to clarify your side. 

 

[Preety_India]

If you do a bit of research you will find that females are often trolled much more than males.. 

They are harassed far far worse.. 1000 times worse than men. 

So it's no surprise that a female complains to a moderator about harassment that she is facing. 

Much of this harassment or trolling comes from desperate males trying to seek her attention when she isn't interested in giving it.. 

The more aloof a female is, the more is the probability of her getting trolled. 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

Integrating Versus Being Yourself 

I'll  talk about this later. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Looking at your visitor list helps a lot with knowing if you have potential troll problem.. 

If You happen to see  some abnormal activity there like if someone is constantly checking your content, constantly spying on your profile and excessively showing interest in your personal stuff in a disparaging way, then you know that there is a problem. 

 

 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

The technical solutions and hacks in this video are really extremely helpful. 

This is what I needed. Not some bullshit spiritual advice. I needed hacks. 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

The only people I truly trust on this forum are the following. 

Leo of course. 

Emerald. 

Forestluv 

Raphael 

Tim R

DocWatts

Roy

Ananta

Etherial Cat

 

These people kinda keep to themselves, a quality that I highly appreciate in people. They don't create any drama

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

If I  ignore everyone else on the forum and only stick to the people mentioned above and communicate with them, a lot of my problem with trolls would be solved. 

Rest of the people are either drama queens or they simply hang around the forum as entertainment, but they don't create any journal for work. I don't see them doing growth work. Just loitering around the forum for fun. 

Flirting or talking to such people will drain my mental energy and that's not a good idea. 

Also I avoid some people in the journal section because they get together and become very gossipy. I'm not the type who will sit in a group of people and gossip about some person. I have always evacuated myself from such groups in both school and college, I'm a bit of a nerd, and such tabloid type of snarky  people don't suit me.. 

I also don't like to be a part of disputes. It's not good for collective harmony. 

People always try to get a rise out of me, even when I don't like to respond to their sarcasm.. 

I'm just a plain simple person. It's difficult to exist like this when people are constantly trying to get on your nerves and all you're doing is being silent and chill. 

I'm an extremely chill person if you get to know me in real life.. 

I'm also caring.. 

If you have me as a friend, you will be too glad to have me around. I like to keep things happy and chill.. 

Unfortunately most people who met me in the past  were  fucking narcissists who would exploit my sweet energy and use me for their gain. 

But I'm past it. I have realized that such people ☛ are drama queens and are best to be avoided.

 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Ok I have made my final decision that I'll be interacting a little more with the following people 

I'll talk to others but occasionally. 

These are the ones I generally get along with. 

Leo of course. 

Emerald. 

Forestluv 

Raphael 

Tim R

DocWatts

Roy

Ananta

Etherial Cat

Bojan V

 

Rest of the forum will be on ignore except a few regulars and respectful members. This will reduce a lot of the trolling, fighting, harassment and people who unnecessarily pick fights. I will be able to avoid them quite easily. 

I don't like very spiritual or philosophical type of people as they have a grandiose ego. 

I like simple objective people. 

 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

The forum is categorized into the following groups of people 

 

 

1 serious journalers. These are serious people. Respect. 

 

2 people who loiter the forum for entertainment. There are some here. Some of them don't care to have journals. They don't do serious work  just chit chat. They were a waste of your precious time. Talking to them is like talking to someone in a mall or coffee shop.. 

 

3 trolls. They come to piss on a different person everyday 

 

4  objective people. These people offer really good solutions and stick to the topic 

 

5 spiritual bullshitters. There are those on the forum that keep saying long philosophy spiritual crap without coming to an objective solution. Avoid these people. They will give you headache. There are plenty of people who are like this. They create dissonance. 

 

6 philosophy /psychedelic bullshitters. These are generally in the meditation section. You don't even understand what they are saying. They live in a bubble and believe that spirituality will solve everything. Sometimes they complain about not being able to connect with reality, well who is to blame? They also complain about side effects of psychedelics and how it didn't help them. Seriously they are a mess. They take everything literally. They are lost people. 

So this is it. 

The only people to talk to are the objective people. Rest to be ignored. 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I'm fully confident that the above mentioned people are the ones who will create the least drama on the forum. I have seen their behavior for 3 years of being here and I can confidently say that none of them have created even a single drama or fuss. Quite good to deal with  easy going, drama free. 

Also I have made this observation that drama people attract other drama people, this is just how the mind works. 

I attracted some drama people in December last year simply out of a need for friendship. Bad bad idea 

Now I'm attracting better people. 

I'm also better at detecting who has the propensity for more drama so I can easily avoid them beforehand. 

Yes when you have drama in your life, you need to check where it's coming from 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Please do not comment on this journal 

 

If you really urgently feel like talking to me then use pm

 

Thanks for the respect and cooperation in keeping my journals drama free. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Planning out new guidelines, rules, standards and boundaries. 

I have realized that having proper boundaries and standards is the most important thing. 

It helps a ton. 

I'm going to be having new boundaries and standards and guidelines to avoid the possibility of interacting with a trollish person. 

Guidelines are as follows 

1. Focus purely on self and work 
2. Vent in journals 
3. Avoid interactions on the forum 
4.  Talk to people you are interested in 
5. Avoid people that you aren't interested in 
6. Keep a tab on forum activity in daily forum log 
7. Ignore 70% of the forum 
8. Do not reply to trolls 
9. Use report option if things become crazy 
10. Avoid drama people 
11. Don't be needy
12. Raise your vibration. This might sound absurd but try raising your vibe where you tend to create a steady flow, not necessarily happy or sad, this will also attract people who are in a similar steady flow

 

Edited May 8, 2021 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

• Raise your standards as to what kind of people you are going to be talking to 
• Raise firm healthy boundaries 
• Make new rules of communication 
• Set guidelines for posting quality content and frequency of this content. Watch what you write and proof-check again to see if it's not going to attract a troll
•  

[Preety_India]

Also avoid being competitive with someone. Just let them go if they are desperately trying to win a debate. 

 

[Preety_India]

The moral story is that I'm not very happy here. 

I was very invested in this place because of my work but at some point I might have to detach myself from this place emotionally and entirely because of the social media nature of this place. 

I don't like social media. I have never liked. 

This place is even more awful because you write your private thoughts here and that is generally used as an ammunition to attack you. 

In the beginning I used to like this place because I was just naive and didn't think too much of it. I only focused on myself and I was pretty much unaware of the whole forum. It didn't register to me. 

As I began to interact more, I began to feel the heat. Most of the time this community is unsupportive. 

Mods don't even care to ask if you need any assistance with anything. 

Any fruitful discussion is stifled by someone derailing the thread. 

People only care about competing with each other and trying to sound better than others. That's completely against the very nature of spirituality, if you ask me. 

If you ever share any of your troubles or problems, you are instantly scapegoated and gaslighted with comments like "you are creating this " "you need to heal " "there is no suffering, you are only imagining it" I see this as a form of armchair philosophy sprinkled with Eastern spirituality.  These people answer questions without actual experience, it's really stupid and annoying and actually never addresses the actual problem or question at all. The whole attitude of "I know it all " is a serious dysfunction in this place. 

Everything is made to look like it is your fault. This hampers self esteem. Some critique is positive and absolutely fine 

But I get this feeling that there is too much finger pointing on this forum..