Proserpina's Journal

[Proserpina]

Highly advanced Beings told me Being was a placebo affect. That I was chosen because I had a pure heart.  That was either my mind playing tricks on me or its true. They said to listen to them and I would be rewarded with their presence, if not then I would suffer the absence.  I have to stay open minded. 

[Proserpina]

1 hour ago, Proserpina said:

Highly advanced Beings told me Being was a placebo affect. That I was chosen because I had a pure heart.  That was either my mind playing tricks on me or its true. They said to listen to them and I would be rewarded with their presence, if not then I would suffer the absence.  I have to stay open minded. 

It's a half truth.  There's more to the Jewel. 

When I followed the Jewel inward my mind grew totally silent.  There's a greater dimension to the Jewel when I go inward.  Take the state and go inward.  

Edited June 2, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

Anyways it's still the Jewel. 

Look, the Jewel is just what is here.  There's nothing better than what is here,  okay? 

I don't care what anyone says, 'higher beings' or not. Going inwards, spaciousness helps me to further appreciate what is here but what is here will always be the Jewel no matter what practices I'm doing. 

[Proserpina]

I recommend dropping too much theory.  Find the Jewel, mess around with it. Study it.  Turn it upside down,  inside out. Drop logic. You'll enter realms,  other dimensions.  Heavenly realms, hell realms. Meet higher Beings.  Awaken and go to sleep.  And all of it will be good for your soul's progress.  This stuff isn't genetic or chemistry.  

[Proserpina]

I have to be okay with dropping theory and logic because I'm not built that way.  The upside to that is that I focus on the territory rather than the map. 

[Proserpina]

I am the Jewel. I am the Jewel. I am all of life. I am devoted to her. 

I'm gonna set an interval timer until I get this and wake up.  

[Proserpina]

You have to become of the earth, buried, dead. 

Light body activation

Empty tank along the spinal cord, chakras

They even indicate the repair of her spinal cord in the video

Edited June 3, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

"Andrew Peters According to Sri Guru Amit Ray, there are total 114 chakras in the human body. When the 114 chakras are activated, you will get many levels of spiritual awakening. You will feel blessed and complete fulfillment. There is nothing more to achieve – a deep, permanent Awakening."

[Proserpina]

To deal with dark entities/hell realms- 

Meditate regularly (or use medication) - to create an atmosphere in which supports chakra work

Chakra work

[Proserpina]

To summarise 

1. THEY'RE NOT TALKING TO YOU (get this into your head- talking about myself)

2. Meditate regularly. Devotion to God. 

3. Chakra work

4. Time. Healing. Rest. No depressive states. Medication - take every opportunity to take medication. 

5. You are not responsible for everything. You are not causing everything even though it feels like it. 

6. Look for the common factor in all of this: God.

7. REST. Be bored out of your mind.  

8. Sure you have bad karma but chakra work skips all that shit. 

9. Practice devotion. Mother Mary, Isis, Genie etc. Find a loving entity to shine their light on you.   

10. Chakra work,  chakra work and more chakra work.

 

Edited June 4, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

11. You (who they are speaking to,  who is causing it all) do not have a body.  You cannot be killed.  You cannot be destroyed. You cannot be barbecued alive.  YOU have nothing to fear.    

So in a way they are talking to you and you are causing it all but you are still identified with a you that doesn't exist and never will exist.

Edited June 4, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

About genetics. I've always had a gift for spirituality with keen concentration. I've devoted all my time to harnessing that, since I can remember. I think it is a combination of soulpath and genetics. The effort I put in carries over from lifetimes of effort but my gifting is genetic. There are peak and valley lifetimes where genetics determine your concentration ability and gifting. 

My concentration ability has reduced recently quite drastically and I've lost a large part of my gifting.  Now I have to rely on effort more so. 

I cried terribly when I lost a big portion of my genetic gifting all of a sudden, such was my attachment. 

But efforting/practice is so much more rewarding and fulfilling anyway. 

To sink into the divine on my own accord rather than automatically through my own gifting is true devotion.  

Edited June 5, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

When I'm in mania I'm typically very popular in my head and outside of my head. Something about the combination of being flirtatious with everyone, hyper confident and very sweet and cheerful (energetic). Like I'm pulling on the individual to come play. 

I'm happy in myself and my own company regardless of circumstances.  But circumstances tend to blossom.  

It's born out of boredom, contentment,  rest and time.  It naturally occurs,  a natural peak. As long as I stay away from depressive states. Chakra work, spiritual experiences and devotion amplify it.

Normally,  I am awkward, lack confidence and ignored. 

I don't like popularity personally.  People can be extra watchful of you and snarky. But it was interesting. 

In my highs I am equally awkward and ignored but there are no f*cks given and I'm bored/ contented in myself (the ticket to popularity)

[Proserpina]

And I feel like I've got a gun
Like I've been changed more ways than one
And this whole world has just begun
And it's so nice to meet me

[Proserpina]

Popularity has more to do with the heavenly realms bleeding through than anything else.  At that point I'm seeing 'higher beings' and it is bleeding through into reality.  There are strange,  alien circumstances of intimacy.  Like a huge orgy, only no sex (only with adults).  Everyone is popular. It's just that I'm radiating  an energy that results in intimacy.  

 

Edited June 5, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

I just realised....

I discovered being on my own when I was 7 years old. 

I worked out that it was me on my own when I was 15 years old. 

How?

[Proserpina]

I have some more clarity through the gruelling process of self questioning and public journalling my failures.  

I have or rather had some misunderstanding about awakening.  I already am awareness, I don't have to try to be awareness. I'm familiar with the jewel but less familiar with myself actually being the jewel (if that makes any sense,  hopefully). I can 'be' awareness in that I don't cover it up with excessive ego, which is already my life path.  I already devote all my practice to doing that. 

I'm focused on chakra work now, as a way of transforming the body through love.  

But omg I AM the Jewel. Do you know how amazing this is?

If only I had trusted my 15 year old self when she had the realization that the Jewel was her. 

[Proserpina]

Of course I knew I was the Jewel semi-consciously* through realizations and enlightenment experiences. But it's not the same as really consciously getting it.  

[Proserpina]

To do: 

-Transform the body through love, chakra work,  increasing spiritual, physical and emotional well-being

-Meditate, to settle into awareness, that I already am,  further

- Engage in happiness (the jewel) more frequently. Stop being lazy

- Read trinfinity

- Watch spiritual teachers

 

Edited June 5, 2022 by Proserpina

[Proserpina]

Loving the body (Seeing the jewel) is vitally important to the path. Particularly along the spine and head. Raises consciousness and transforms the body. 

Note to self: Rest, peace, boredom/contentment, medication does this automatically. Very similar energy work done automatically

Edited June 5, 2022 by Proserpina