Questions about "How survival shapes who you are" video

[romansoloviov]

Hi @Leo Gura! I have a few questions after watching the new video about survival.

1. What are some ways to change up our ingrained patterns and habits?

2. What specific things did you do to stop craving external approval? Looking for a "relative" solution because I'm still handling my survival and am probably years away from any meaningful degree of enlightenment.

3. Can efficient survival methods disguise as passions? For example: someone really enjoys basketball, spends hours playing it every day, and dreams about being an amazing basketball player, while studying the more boring engineering in college – fits the passion narrative. They become really good at it, maybe one of the best at their school. But upon introspecting they realize they've pushed themselves to excel at basketball because it was their way to gain status and approval from guys and girls in high school and college ("omg look how good he is at basketball!"), and that it's not that meaningful to them (e. g. if they had $100m and all the love and approval they realistically need, they would do something related to engineering with, by their definition, more direct impact on the world, and play basketball as a hobby). Is basketball that person's passion?

4. It seems like our "authentic self" is just a collection of past experiences and can change a lot. Let's say someone wanted to be an artist, but had to go into business after college due to circumstances, which was much less enjoyable than art. Eventually they learned to enjoy business and made it meaningful and impactful in a positive way (life purpose), maybe even incorporating a little bit of art into it. Does it really make sense at this point to say they're authentically an artist?

Of course, everyone else is welcome to share their thoughts too! Thanks.

[Leo Gura]

32 minutes ago, romansoloviov said:

Hi @Leo Gura! I have a few questions after watching the new video about survival.

1. What are some ways to change up our ingrained patterns and habits?

There's no shortcut to Just do it

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2. What specific things did you do to stop craving external approval? Looking for a "relative" solution because I'm still handling my survival and am probably years away from any meaningful degree of enlightenment.

I try to replace feelings of love I get from hearing approval with my own internal love generated by my spiritual connection to consciousness itself.

In a sense, cut off external feelings of love and reground your sense of love directly in consciousness and being. Or you could reground love into the doing of your art/work. Also, I remind myself that people who praise me are usually not very conscious and only do so out of selfishness. If I was a rapist no one would praise me. And there is no reason why I deserve any more praise now than if I was a rapist. So people's praise of me has nothing to do with reality. It's just their self-biased projections -- which I have little interest in. My love cannot be grounded in the projections of others.

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3. Can efficient survival methods disguise as passions? For example: someone really enjoys basketball, spends hours playing it every day, and dreams about being an amazing basketball player, while studying the more boring engineering in college – fits the passion narrative. They become really good at it, maybe one of the best at their school. But upon introspecting they realize they've pushed themselves to excel at basketball because it was their way to gain status and approval from guys and girls in high school and college ("omg look how good he is at basketball!"),

That's very common.

However, that can lead to a genuine passion. Or not. It depends.

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and that it's not that meaningful to them

But it could be meaningful to them. Or it could not. If it is not, then obviously there's a problem. But if it becomes genuinely meaningful then it's less of a problem.

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Is basketball that person's passion?

Usually a passion is not something that raises much doubt in your mind. If you're very doubtful about it, then it probably isn't your passion. But if you just love the thing for no good reason -- that's a sign of genuine passion. You love it for its own sake -- that's passion.

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4. It seems like our "authentic self" is just a collection of past experiences and can change a lot.

Indeed

But there is also a kernel to the psyche's personality which does not change, it only gets obscured like the sun on a cloudy day.

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Let's say someone wanted to be an artist, but had to go into business after college due to circumstances, which was much less enjoyable than art. Eventually they learned to enjoy business and made it meaningful and impactful in a positive way (life purpose), maybe even incorporating a little bit of art into it. Does it really make sense at this point to say they're authentically an artist?

Again, it depends. The person could have stumbled into a second passion or even a higher passion. You can have multiple passions and you can also find higher passions than your existing ones. But it's also very common that a person will talk themselves out of truly pursing their passion (like art) because it is not as practical or "realistic" as something like business. They can also be interested in business, but deep down they know that business is not truly as exciting as art. But they are too scared to drop business and go all-in on art. So they talk themselves into settling for business.

Becoming an artist requires way more courage than becoming a businessman.

[WaveInTheOcean]

". If I was a rapist no one would praise me. And there is no reason why I deserve any more praise now than if I was a rapist". @Leo Gura

Sometimes I don't understand why you write stuff like this here on the forum. What's the point? Seems rather fucking dangerous to write on a public forum (without any elaboration), especially given your authority as a sort of spiritual YT-guru with 1 mil. subs.

I know you say you just write straight from the gut here on the forum, but consider that actually hundreds/thousands of people are reading what you're writing here (not only forum members but also just random anonymous guests without much prior spiritual/non-dual understanding)... And they may interpret what you just wrote as a justification to go out and act out their selfish impulses/desires to, for instance, hurt a woman.

I mean, sure, ultimately speaking, from an Absolute/God-PoV, indeed you are loved/forgiven equally whether you are Dalai Lama or Osama Bin Laden, cos both are just God's dreamed up characters appearing in His Infinite Imagination. In other words, both are You.

However, needless to say, from a human/relative PoV, you deserve infinitely more praise if you make free self-development youtube videos than if you go out and rape women.

Edited April 26, 2021 by WaveInTheOcean

[Leo Gura]

@WaveInTheOcean Your opinions of me are purely selfish and therefore shouldn't be trusted.

Isn't this obvious?

Why you make such a big fuss of it?

[Opo]

1 hour ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

hurt a woman.

Why do you assume Leo would only rape women? 

Just a joke, pls no ban. 

[blackchair]

7 minutes ago, Opo said:

Why do you assume Leo would only rape women? 

Just a joke, pls no ban. 

not my type sorry.

[WaveInTheOcean]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

@WaveInTheOcean Your opinions of me are purely selfish and therefore shouldn't be trusted.

Isn't this obvious?

Why you make such a big fuss of it?

Woah with the projections here brother.

In my selfish PoV you are the one creating a fuss out of it here =D 

I'm just standing on my illusory 'ground' speaking some common sense and stating the obvious, while it seems from here that the imaginary Leo Gura is conflating the Absolute with the relative.

ANY opinion ANYONE makes can be viewed as purely selfish. But then again, after awakening you see that any duality ultimately must collapse and is actually ONE.

There is no self but the Selfless Self, so selfish-selfless, potato-potato

[Leo Gura]

@WaveInTheOcean Read the context of this thread.

I was not talking to you nor making any fuss. I was answering the guy's question about how I avoid approval seeking. If you don't like my strategy, don't use it.

Just the way you read my posts betrays how selfish your perceptions of me are. Hence why should I care about your approval when it is more about you than about me?

[WaveInTheOcean]

18 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@WaveInTheOcean Read the context of this thread.

I was not talking to you nor making any fuss. I was answering the guy's question about how I avoid approval seeking. If you don't like my strategy, don't use it.

I will confess. I did not actually read OPs post. I mostly only read your posts on this forum, cos I (ehm my ego) like to read what you have in your mind, cos my ego believes you're a very special human being and that I can extract a lot of knowledge/wisdom out of you, I can use in my own selfish pursuits of gaining more power, more consciousness, more freedom.

So I might have slightly missed the context here - my apologies!

My selfish opinion about how I think it's wrong of you (relatively speaking, ultimately speaking it's Perfect, Love, Beautiful ofc!???) as a kind of perceived authority figure to basically write "rape is fine, no problem!" on a public forum without further elaboration... stands.

Avoiding approval seeking may be an intelligent thing to do; just notice that the desire to avoid it may stem from a special shadowy unconscious part of your psyche.

(The ego's constant, sneaky ways of always participating in the infinite game of one-upmanship are fascinating and endless).

"Just the way you read my posts betrays how selfish your perceptions of me are. Hence why should I care about your approval when it is more about you than about me?"

Okay, okay. But chillax a bit too, man. Don't be so uptight. 

It's all Good.

?

Edited April 26, 2021 by WaveInTheOcean

[Leo Gura]

46 minutes ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

to basically write "rape is fine, no problem!" on a public forum without further elaboration... stands.

I never wrote any such thing.

[Eternal Unity]

1 hour ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

Woah with the projections here brother.

In my selfish PoV you are the one creating a fuss out of it here =D 

I'm just standing on my illusory 'ground' speaking some common sense and stating the obvious, while it seems from here that the imaginary Leo Gura is conflating the Absolute with the relative.

ANY opinion ANYONE makes can be viewed as purely selfish. But then again, after awakening you see that any duality ultimately must collapse and is actually ONE.

There is no self but the Selfless Self, so selfish-selfless, potato-potato

Just look at Leo's Signature

It's all there in 12 words.

[WaveInTheOcean]

26 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I never wrote any such thing.

Well, I know. But it could easily be interpreted that way.

"Also, I remind myself that people who praise me are usually not very conscious and only do so out of selfishness. If I was a rapist no one would praise me. And there is no reason why I deserve any more praise now than if I was a rapist. So people's praise of me has nothing to do with reality."

And from a sort of Absolute-God-PoV, all rapes that have ever happened -- and will happen -- are Perfect, Love, God, just like EVERYTHING else.

However commiting rape is not in alignment with (the nature of) God/The Absolute/Love/Perfectness/Selflessness.

While making free, top quality youtube videos about Love, God, Spirituality, self-development (etc.) is INDEED very much in alignment with IT.

And therefore, while we shouldn't hate or torture a rapist (but lock him up and teach him self-love while he's sitting in prison), we shouldn't praise him either.

You deserve praise, though.

Although yes, too much unconscious praise can be toxic for both the praiser and the praised. All in moderation.

Now, you can say that this is just my selfish interpretation/narrative of it all. Sure, I don't give a fuck though.

I'm God. You're God.

I'm free to spin up any story up I want to. Absolute fucking freedom <3

Edited April 26, 2021 by WaveInTheOcean

[Loving Radiance]

3 hours ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

I will confess. I did not actually read OPs post.

That is a good lesson for you now Getting a feeling of op's frame is important.

[traveler]

3 hours ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

However commiting rape is not in alignment with (the nature of) God/The Absolute/Love/Perfectness/Selflessness.

While making free, top quality youtube videos about Love, God, Spirituality, self-development (etc.) is INDEED very much in alignment with IT.

Have you seen the vid? Rape is not in alignment with your IDEA of what God/The Absolute/Love/Perfectness/Selflessness is. Let's say there was an "absolute POV" (there isn't), from that perspective everything is as it should be. Leo touches on this in the video. A rapist is a bundle of experiences leading up to the moment of the rape, perfectly formed by every factor that goes into creating the mind that is capable of doing that. Just as your ideas of perfection are a consequence of everything leading up to this moment. 

[Someone here]

@WaveInTheOcean Leo is exactly right 

And he uses the rape example deliberately to convey the point. That none of us deserve praising or bashing. It's all your selfish biasis There is absolutely nothing inherently wrong about rape or a rapist in actuality. Read this again. 

In the big picture, none of us are doing this. 

Not the act of seeking, nor the act of surrendering.

You are not in control of either one. Its easy to prove if you try to imagine the thought you're going to have in the next 10 seconds.

In a sense.. I'm not writing this.. and you are not reading this. It's all being played and it's all karma. Circumstances are infinitely complex and destiny is inevitble. As the awareness watching the movie, we have zero influence over the plot.

"You're not doing it, it's doing you" - Alan Watts

When you let that sink in you will understand what Leo meant. 

 

 

[WaveInTheOcean]

13 minutes ago, traveler said:

Have you seen the vid? Rape is not in alignment with your IDEA of what God/The Absolute/Love/Perfectness/Selflessness is. Let's say there was an "absolute POV" (there isn't), from that perspective everything is as it should be. Leo touches on this in the video. 

Indeed. But have you read my post?

Let me quote for ya: 

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Now, you can say that this is just my selfish interpretation/narrative of it all. Sure, I don't give a fuck though.

But yes, "an absolute PoV" is an idea. There isn't really one... Except there is. It is this.

:->  :-<
 

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"from that perspective everything is as it should be."

Yes yes. All is well, I didn't say anything else.
 

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A rapist is a bundle of experiences leading up to the moment of the rape, perfectly formed by every factor that goes into creating the mind that is capable of doing that.

I may totally miss your point here (I do know what you mean though). But I feel like saying (not necessarily directed to you dear fellow intrepid traveler)..:

Enough of this spiritual bypassing. 

A rapist is a fucking rapist.
It's bad. Rape is bad, mkay.

It's all Perfect Imagination, but within the context of 'THAT' (life/dream/maya): RAPE IS BAD.

A RAPIST IS BAD.

Do not hurt others (=yourself).

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Just as your ideas of perfection are a consequence of everything leading up to this moment. 

Yes. 
However, we gotta make distinctions between the words as concepts & then what the words are pointing to

I say "Infinite Love" , "Oneness", "Consciousness", "God", "Infinite Imagination" or "Absolute Perfection" and yes, when you listen to them your brain interprets them and the result is not necessarily what the words are pointing to, just as my finger pointing to the moon is not the moon.

Absolute Truth does exist (my words try to point to that, even though I know its futile:D), however. Not as an idea or a concept or story. All my wordplay "Love, God, Oneness, Imagination" is conceptual/idealistic/stories in nature, yes, yes, but I'm just using them to try to point to that-which-cannot-be-pointed to (Absolute Truth), hehe, but only seen/realized/directly experienced. lol.

Absolute Truth cannot be doubted when first realized, however.

Absolute Truth is the source of all doubt, of all falsehood, all lesser truths, of life, of existence, of everything.

It can't be communicated.

That Reality is Perfect/Good/Love/ is not a belief or an idea.
Explicitly, It sounds like it is an idea or a belief-system or a story. But implicitly it is not an idea or a belief or a story.

You can't argue with Absolute Truth when first realized.

The "I am not this, I am not that"-approach (nothingness/no self-realization) is highly effective and I used it myself.

Ultimately, that approach (& accompanying insight) has to be transcended as well though, because it has its limits.

The realization of nothingness / no-self is a lesser truth. It is true enough, and VERY useful to grasp fully (the implications of it and so on), but it is not Absolute Truth.

The "major problem" with the method/'attachment to the realization on its own' is that it is inherently dualistic in nature.

By saying "I am not this, I am not that" .. or "it is not that, it is not this ... or "there is no self, there is nothing" ... or "the self is an illusion, no-self is the truth" etc. etc. we create dualities:

truth - non-truth
illusion - real
nothingness - something
self - no-self
right - wrong

And Absolute Truth is beyond all that. Absolute Truth isn't possible to express with words, but if I try, I would say it encompasses all dualities, it is the source of it all. I would call it God, in lack of a better word. Or Love.

Reality is a real illusion.
There is no self and no no-self either. There is the Selfless Self.
There is something which is nothing.
There is true beliefs which are false.
There are wrong ways which are right.
There is lots of evil in the world, but it is love.
There are mistakes which are Perfect.

Non-duality. All opposites are two sides of the same COIN. THAT COIN IS THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH = GOD = LOVE.

Ultimately, it is all just God.

And when you have first fully bathed in the awareness/realization of what "God" actually FEELS like (direct experience) (through letting go of all beliefs/ideas/fear/insecurities/filters, so nothing remain but the Light of God), there is no doubt left. You now "know" God is not an idea, but the realest of all real and unreal things. It's you. The perciever has become the perceived. The perceived, the perceiver. Full circle. The snake biting its own tail. Oneness is seen again. All illusory seperation gone.

All boundaries dissolved.
Everything fusing into Itself out of Itself.

[WaveInTheOcean]

23 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@WaveInTheOcean Leo is exactly right 

Stop licking his ass lol

See my latest reply to traveler ^^ . But I'll take your bait ;):

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And he uses the rape example deliberately to convey the point. That none of us deserve praising or bashing. It's all your selfish biasis.

All of us are no-one = God. And God is worthy of // gives Herself infinite Love, indeed.

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There is absolutely nothing inherently wrong about rape or a rapist in actuality. Read this again. 

Dude. The rape is imaginary. The rapist is imaginary.

(The 'I' sitting on an imaginary chair thinking it is writing messages to "WaveInTheOcean" is imaginary.)

Of course, if WaveInTheOcean during a dream at night dream that he's raping a girl, there is nothing inherently wrong with the dream nor WaveInTheOcean, and he shouldn't go to jail. ... - That's obvious, bro  

However, I'd prefer to not dream stuff like that where some part of my infinite imagination is suffering (the girl in the above case).

And I'm God. So there is that.

Luckily, WaveInTheOcean has never dreamt such nasty stuff before, at least nothing its already messed-up brain-mind could remember.
 

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In the big picture, none of us are doing this. 

God is. You're God.

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You are not in control of either one. Its easy to prove if you try to imagine the thought you're going to have in the next 10 seconds.

God/We is always in control bro. We just like to imagine we are not in control, that's the most fun for Us it seems  

 

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"You're not doing it, it's doing you" - Alan Watts

Alan Watts knew what's up. WaveInTheOcean likes the fact you're quoting him. Plus points in his book!

However, ultimately the truth is that:

- you are doing it
AND
- it is doing you

That rabbit hole is infinitely deep!
We like to imagine there is still much for Us to learn.
Infinite things, in fact.

Save travels <3

1 hour ago, Loving Radiance said:

That is a good lesson for you now Getting a feeling of op's frame is important.

haha i just couldnt be bothered. still haven't read it properly lol.

Edited April 26, 2021 by WaveInTheOcean

[Mason Riggle]

7 minutes ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

However, ultimately the truth is that:

- you are doing it
AND
- it is doing you

Nah.. you ARE it.. it IS you.. 

There is no doing. Only being. 

It's so simple. 

What could anything ever 'do', that isn't just more 'being how it is'?

[Someone here]

@WaveInTheOcean 

Interesting you brought that up. That means none of us are here on our own accord. We were meant to be here. Not "chosen" by an external force.. but by the internal force which led to my inevitable reading of your comment, which led to my inevitable negative reaction, which led to my writing of this post driven by my passion for Truth. We're not plotting the course, we are the course. Not even the universe knows how this is all going to play out, but it does everything it can through the present moment to evolve. Now, I don't know for sure if what I just said is true, but it seems nice. 

 

[WaveInTheOcean]

7 minutes ago, Mason Riggle said:

Nah.. you ARE it.. it IS you.. 
There is no doing. Only being. 
It's so simple. 

Yes, exactly. That's what I was trying to say lol.