Dad In Serious Condition.

[Hardik jain]

(Leo if you could help on this It'd be really good)

My dad is in serious condition ( only 10% of his liver is functioning properly) I'm really feeling super depressed. What do I do? He was told that if he eats according to the diet given his damage will not exceed but he doesn't know about his condition and according to how much I know him he will not follow the diet. What do I do? I'm feeling sad and crying. My age is 22 and I'm really very depressed and crying. How do I become emotionally strong?

Edited October 28, 2016 by Hardik jain

[Extreme Z7]

@Hardik jain Don't fight any emotion that crops up. Fully accept your emotional state no matter what. Also, maybe create a long term plan for developing emotional mastery because it seems to me like you're trying to look for a shortcut.

[Xpansion]

Its ok and perfectly normal to feel the way you feel so as extremZ7 has said allow yourself to feel it all and try not to suppress anything.  Do you have someone to turn to for support?  Where is your mum?  siblings?  friends? relatives?  You dont need to suffer alone.   Find someone who can listen and empathise with you. 

Edited October 28, 2016 by Xpansion

[Hardik jain]

@Extreme Z7 what long term plan? Plus I've been meditation from 400+ days and I still feel emotionally insecure why is that so bro?

[Xpansion]

5 minutes ago, Hardik jain said:

@Extreme Z7 what long term plan? Plus I've been meditation from 400+ days and I still feel emotionally insecure why is that so bro?

  Meditation is not a fix. Its not meant to stop you from feeling anything but is meant to help you learn to be more accepting of all that you feel.   You can't ever not feel difficult emotions.   They are part of life.  Pain is part of life but you can learn to see the ways in which you react to pain causes more suffering.   Its like the second arrow.   You get shot with one arrow and then you make it worse by tensing up and recoiling (the second arrow) instead of allowing yourself to experience it and softening to it.  Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.  

Edited October 28, 2016 by Xpansion

[Extreme Z7]

Just now, Hardik jain said:

what long term plan?

What long term plan, indeed. . . if you don't have one, it's simple. Just be patient and study educational material and most importantly, yourself. Gain mindfulness over your actions, thoughts, and behaviors and how they affect how you feel.
 

2 minutes ago, Hardik jain said:

I've been meditation from 400+ days and I still feel emotionally insecure why is that so?

You're treating meditation as if it's some shortcut to bliss. Just keep focusing on learning new things on this path that may help you. Embrace your own ignorance/incompetence. Once you get a deep understanding of how little you actually know about life, then it will make perfect sense why you still have big problems in your life even after a year of personal development.

[Hardik jain]

@Xpansion but I'm not even accepting the situation.

[Extreme Z7]

@Hardik jain Then accept your lack of acceptance. Counter intuitively, removing your neurotic desire to improve your reality improves your reality.

[Hardik jain]

4 minutes ago, Extreme Z7 said:

What long term plan, indeed. . . if you don't have one, it's simple. Just be patient and study educational material and most importantly, yourself. Gain mindfulness over your actions, thoughts, and behaviors and how they affect how you feel.
 

You're treating meditation as if it's some shortcut to bliss. Just keep focusing on learning new things on this path that may help you. Embrace your own ignorance/incompetence. Once you get a deep understanding of how little you actually know about life, then it will make perfect sense why you still have big problems in your life even after a year of personal development.

Mindfulness will help but I'm finding very difficult to be mindful and I'm also not even able to eat properly.

[Xpansion]

10 minutes ago, Hardik jain said:

@Xpansion but I'm not even accepting the situation.

Being aware of that is a good first step and i second what extremeZ7 said ^

Edited October 28, 2016 by Xpansion

[The]

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Edited October 28, 2016 by Kayako

[Xpansion]

21 minutes ago, Kayako said:

I don't think meditation advice was what you're looking for? these guys

maybe pray to your god

Id share your emotions and concerns with your father.. that may encourage him to get his diet in order.. if you're able to help try to, that may make you feel better.. 

Um how do you know he even believes in "god"?     If you read what he/she asked you will see that they did actually ask about meditation - 

42 minutes ago, Hardik jain said:

@Extreme Z7  I've been meditation from 400+ days and I still feel emotionally insecure why is that so bro?

Edited October 28, 2016 by Xpansion

[Prabhaker]

9 minutes ago, Xpansion said:

I've been meditation from 400+ days and I still feel emotionally insecure why is that so

You must be doing something anti-meditative during period ! 

[Xpansion]

Just now, Prabhaker said:

You must be doing something anti-meditative during period ! 

No I was quoting the OP

[Bob84]

@Hardik jain I lost my dad 2 years ago. I asume him not making it goes true you head the whole time, as it did with me.

Spend time with him, talk with him, try and do what you can and have no regrets.

Emotionaly strong is just a consept that will not help. Instead realize that these emotions come from you thouths and you giving value/cherishing those thouths.

Edited October 28, 2016 by Bob84

[Prabhaker]

Just now, Xpansion said:

No I was quoting the OP

Sorry, I was bit unconscious. 

[Xpansion]

I didn't use the quote thing I just put quotation marks  

Edited October 28, 2016 by Xpansion

[Hardik jain]

@Bob84 how old are you?

[Bob84]

@Hardik jain 31

[Leo Gura]

@Hardik jain Sorry about your situation.

See this video: https://www.actualized.org/articles/how-to-deal-with-strong-negative-emotions

Rather than wishing the emotions or situation away, muster the courage to feel into it and see it as part of reality. Reality is brutal sometimes. It's important to cultivate a respect for that.  An understanding of that only really comes through nobly stomaching the hard times rather than escaping them.

If you do this, it will drive you deeper into true growth. So that's the up-side.