Life Progress

[Raptorsin7]

@Tyler Robinson Have  a good day too.

[Raptorsin7]

@Tyler Robinson How do you know that what you're saying is true and that you are giving advice from a genuine place? 

What motivated you to comment?

[Tyler Robinson]

@Raptorsin7  I have been in a situation where my ex lied to me about his bisexuality. I asked him again and again about it. He was hiding it. He thought that if he told me about it, I would reject him. Back then I was a bit, you could say, not so comfortable with the idea of entertaining bisexuality. I probably would have rejected him. So our relationship ended and he later on admitted that he was bisexual which hurt me because I thought he should have let me know early on. That day I reflected on why he wasn't being open about the truth to me. I realized that he thought he was going to be judged or shamed. His idea was not to deceive me. He was only hiding because he was not too open about such things, he didn't know how I would react to it. Hindsight is always 20/20. I don't think that way anymore. Now I'm more open to the idea of bisexuality than before. My transformation to becoming a trans has helped me understand and explore the idea of transgenderism and homosexuality. 

A few weeks ago when I confided in a male colleague about my trans situation, he was very pissed. Next day he gave me a death threat and said that such people do not belong in society. That has caused me to not open up about my trans struggles to people around me. It becomes difficult to tell the whole truth when you're judged and shamed by those around you. In addition people get to call me a liar if I don't tell the whole truth. It's a tricky thing. 

What prompted me to comment is the statement you made - "I fucking hate dishonest people."

Not gonna lie but that statement hurt me very badly because I have been dishonest too in my life to people around me. But I only did so because I always feared their judgement and hate towards me.. Being truthful was probably a huge struggle for me ever since childhood. 

But I know deep down that I never had bad intentions. I was just addicted to lying and dishonesty and a lot of it has to do with the way I felt judged all the time. 

That prompted me to comment, I can see others struggling with truth just the way I do. 

If we all lived with more compassion and less judgement, maybe people would feel much better being truthful. 

Just my two cents. 

I'm also writing a journal on serial killers and Mass shooters and trying to understand why they kill people. 

At the end of the day, after a thorough contemplation on the nature of good and evil I have come to the following conclusion - 

All the evil we see in the world is the evil we ourselves create. 

It goes along the lines of another famous saying - 

Be the change you wish to see in the world. 

What I mean is - we blame all the evil on a person, on people who do wrong things. But it's the ultimate absence of love that gives birth to all this evil. People who do wrong things are mere scapegoats that we point our fingers to. Who are the mass shooters? Who are the narcissists? Who are the psychopaths? We might blame them endlessly. But that doesn't solve the problem. We give birth to them. We create them and we blame them. These people were raised by the same society that blames and shames them. We don't want to address their trauma, their concerns, their parenting, their upbringing but we just want to put them in jail and throw away the key, without addressing the issues at their root. I feel this is unjust and unfair. Evil is not an external force with puppet strings in the hands of the devil. Evil is right here within us and we cause it because we don't want to truly love each other. It creates separation. Separation creates a society of you versus them. Then a person no longer cares about you and scams you. We don't see the underlying connections. We only blame the person. 

There's a saying in the Bible - don't blame the sinner, blame the sin. 

So yeah, when we create a more compassionate society, we won't have charlatans, sociopaths, psychopaths and mass shooters. There won't exist a need for one person to do wrong to another because where there is empathy there is no greed, there is no bad intent. 

Just my contemplative thoughts on the subject of good and bad, good versus evil 

 

 

[Raptorsin7]

@Tyler Robinson Yeah I can relate to judgments around gender and sexuality. I still hold the view that homosexuality is a perversion of the sexual drive.

I can see how judging and hating someone for that is counter productive and not wise, but at the same time part of me thinks if you were fully healthy and integrated you wouldn't be trans, gay, etc. The same way you wouldn't be a murder if you had healthy psychology.

I think when I heal my rage and anger I will have a more tolerant perspective of Nahm. I know my view is not pure, but I feel very betrayed by him and I feel justified. 

Thanks for being honest and sharing your opinion.

[RendHeaven]

9 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I could give two fucks about my reputation if it came at the cost of the truth.

Not to put you on the spot but you do realize how bold of a statement this is?

Putting rep over truth is in some ways the definition of human. If you always adhered to the truth you would just die.

[Zeroguy]

Nahm's greed has no limits.

[Raptorsin7]

@RendHeaven You're arguing with Rumi. If you think you know better than him be my guest.

[Raptorsin7]

@Zeroguy Being in a relationship helped her grow a lot.

I didn't realize until the end of our conversation

[Loba]

3 hours ago, Zeroguy said:

Nahm's greed has no limits.

I think we're all a little greedy deep down inside.
If someone offered to donate to me 8k for spewing general spiritual knowledge, I'd fucking accept that shit.

Pay off some bills, you know?

 

[RendHeaven]

7 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

@RendHeaven You're arguing with Rumi. If you think you know better than him be my guest.

No, I'm questioning your integrity as you copy-paste Rumi ?

[Raptorsin7]

@RendHeaven Theres nothing I've done that I wouldn't admit to if someone was harmed by me.

And I'm not saying I perfectly embody rumi, but I'm also not going to say I know better than his poetry.

Where is my integrity in question with respect to rumi's poetry?

[Zeroguy]

@Loba Now he is charging 150$ per session it was 200.

I understand it pays bills but that amount of money (8k)for no progress.Plus he lied on his forum he never received that much.

He is ENFJ conman of all personality types as you say. 

[Raptorsin7]

@Zeroguy At least I learned valuable lesson about people who appear good on the surface, but in truth there is something rotton.

I admit that I may be too vengeful against Nahm, there is a more compassionate approach. But I have yet to see someone who takes issue with me blasting Nahm, who also has the integrity to acknowledge he's a conman.

 

[Zeroguy]

16 hours ago, Loba said:

I think we're all a little greedy deep down inside.
If someone offered to donate to me 8k for spewing general spiritual knowledge, I'd fucking accept that shit.

Pay off some bills, you know?

 

@LobaYeah.

 

[Zeroguy]

Can you explain for what exactly you payed 8k to Nahm ,Rap?

[Gesundheit2]

14 hours ago, Raptorsin7 said:

@RendHeaven

And I'm not saying I perfectly embody rumi, but I'm also not going to say I know better than his poetry.

Plot twist: Rumi was just another Nahm.

[Raptorsin7]

@Gesundheit2 Not even close 

[Raptorsin7]

4 hours ago, Zeroguy said:

Can you explain for what exactly you payed 8k to Nahm ,Rap?

So what happened was I had a peak experience on LSD after our second call and that's what made me realize the path was real etc. And I attributed part of that success to Nahm, I assumed he was enlightened and fully understood that peak experience and could help me learn to live from that place.

The first like 7 months I think were just donations, I was donating a lot after each session. I wasn't really learning anything useful at all from the sessions, but I kept thinking that soon it will click and then I will learn how to fully embody that peak lsd state. 

I basically payed thinking I had found this gem of an enlightenment teacher and eventually he would be able to teach me to how to access that peak lsd state without psychidelics or at least get me close. That's what I thought. But i'm pretty sure Nahm has no idea what that experience is even like, and there was a complete mismatch in our expectations.

Then later he began charging per session. What really stuck out to me was after I hadn't paid for a while he brought it up. It didn't make sense because he always said he was a successful business man and why would he be concerned about money after I donated so much, but that was probably the biggest flag that Nahm was greedy and was not who I thought he was.

I made virtually 0 progress in understanding what he was teaching. He kept saying pick better feeling thoughts, to this day I don't get it. And he kept repeating the same thing, 0 change in strategy. And when I pushed him on it later, he blamed me and said I didn't listen to his advice so it's my issue. He knew I wasn't listening and yet continued to accept donations and lead me on, and didn't even bring it up. You would think after months of someone not listening and accepting thousands of dollars that would be the main focus of the calls, but I don't think we ever discussed that in any of the calls.

[Raptorsin7]

@KH2 Yeah, trauma bonding and cult followings are very powerful I guess.

This forum is actually full of incredibly wounded and toxic people so someone like Nahm appears like a saint to them. And many of them have less integrity than Nahm so him misleading people and accepting thousands of dollars from a deluded seeker isn't anything out of the ordinary.

[Gesundheit2]

38 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

So what happened was I had a peak experience on LSD after our second call and that's what made me realize the path was real etc. And I attributed part of that success to Nahm, I assumed he was enlightened and fully understood that peak experience and could help me learn to live from that place.

The first like 7 months I think were just donations, I was donating a lot after each session. I wasn't really learning anything useful at all from the sessions, but I kept thinking that soon it will click and then I will learn how to fully embody that peak lsd state. 

I basically payed thinking I had found this gem of an enlightenment teacher and eventually he would be able to teach me to how to access that peak lsd state without psychidelics or at least get me close. That's what I thought. But i'm pretty sure Nahm has no idea what that experience is even like, and there was a complete mismatch in our expectations.

Then later he began charging per session. What really stuck out to me was after I hadn't paid for a while he brought it up. It didn't make sense because he always said he was a successful business man and why would he be concerned about money after I donated so much, but that was probably the biggest flag that Nahm was greedy and was not who I thought he was.

I made virtually 0 progress in understanding what he was teaching. He kept saying pick better feeling thoughts, to this day I don't get it. And he kept repeating the same thing, 0 change in strategy. And when I pushed him on it later, he blamed me and said I didn't listen to his advice so it's my issue. He knew I wasn't listening and yet continued to accept donations and lead me on, and didn't even bring it up. You would think after months of someone not listening and accepting thousands of dollars that would be the main focus of the calls, but I don't think we ever discussed that in any of the calls.

Sorry dude, but it's 100% your fault. You can't blame others for your naivety and immaturity. I'm not a fan of Nahm to be honest. I even left his forum on bad terms. But your story is not a story of a charlatan preying on an innocent victim. He did not force you into anything. You did everything willingly. And you could have stopped talking to him when he started charging money. You had the choice, and you simply chose to continue. It's your decision, take responsibility and stop playing the victim. Or don't. Just my 2 cents.