Raptorsin7

Is Not Wanting Children A Sign Of Trauma

23 posts in this topic

If a person does not want children does is that a sign of psychological trauma?

I know that people have preferences and there are many walks of life that may prevent having children, like being a priest or something along those lines. But if a person is a typical male or female who desires a relationship but who does not want children is that a sign of trauma?

I always wonder the reasoning when some people are adamant they don't want children. I have a few people in my life who don't want children, young woman, and it's because they were unhappy with their upbringing.

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I would say yes. I don't see a viable reason why someone wouldn't want kids. Any logistical issues? Then understandable. 

Otherwise most likely it is something that has happened in the past that is contributing to the decision. 

I would recommend shadow work as a way of getting to the root of this feeling and to find the exact source where it's coming from, although such feelings cannot be fixed easily, it gives a certain amount of closure as to why such feelings arise in the consciousness. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

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Why would it be a sign of trauma? You havent given anything to back up that claim?

Maybe some people just feel its too much responsibility and they want to focus on other things like travelling, purpose, charity.


Dont look at me! Look inside!

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Just now, Rilles said:

Why would it be a sign of trauma? You havent given anything to back up that claim?

Maybe some people just feel its too much responsibility and they want to focus on other things like travelling, purpose, charity.

I'm just wondering, I'm not claiming it is a statement of fact. I think it's commonly seen as unusual. 

Yeah maybe if someone dedicated their life to a higher cause. But then again there are many great people in history dedicated to causes greater than themselves who also have children.

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3 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

I'm just wondering, I'm not claiming it is a statement of fact. I think it's commonly seen as unusual. 

Yeah maybe if someone dedicated their life to a higher cause. But then again there are many great people in history dedicated to causes greater than themselves who also have children.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voluntary_childlessness


Dont look at me! Look inside!

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@Rilles  a common indicator of a difference is it look out for signs as to how the person reacts when confronted with such a question.. 

Do they react in a sad manner, would they want children if their circumstances are better, do they feel an inner sense of regret, envy or guilt for not wanting kids versus being very non chalant and happy about such a decision, the former behaviour alluding to a certain sense of deprivation (probably brought on by trauma ) and the latter simply being a person's decision to not have kids and having nothing to do with trauma. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

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Before people had no choice whether or not they had children, it was normal.  
now people have a choice. 
why not adopt a child who is without a family instead of adding to the population? 
 


 

 

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Just now, intotheblack said:

why not adopt a child who is without a family instead of adding to the population? 
 

I want a child who is like me. I also want my children to have the best possible life and genetics influence a child's life to a decent degree. I have some advantages in life that I can't take credit for but i am thankful, granted the reverse is also true.

Also the argument about not adding a person because of the population is kind of misleading. If we should be conscious of population dynamics with having kids then we should be putting guys like Leo and Elon musk in breeding programs

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1 minute ago, Raptorsin7 said:

want a child who is like me. I also want my children to have the best possible life and genetics influence a child's life to a decent degree. I have some advantages in life that I can't take credit for but i am thankful, granted the reverse is also true.

so it’s all about you then? You only want a child for your own personal agenda.  

 


 

 

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Just now, intotheblack said:

so it’s all about you then? You only want a child for your own personal agenda.  

No, there are many factors that go into wanting a kid. As far as wanting a child in the face of overpopulation, I am confident that If i have a child they will be a net positive for humanity

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Maybe it is not relevant at the timeframe they are in. 

Would be weird to desire a child 24/7

(I also think it's a bit karmic. If you don't have karma with a soul(s) to help out incarnate on earth. Then you probably don't want one either. Leos karma at this timeframe is focused on Actualized.org. Maybe it will change and he will have a family when his service is done. It depends on the karmic lot in life and what soul agreements you have made before incarnation on earth.)

Maybe the desperation to want children is a sign of a want to heal a trauma?

You are incapable to heal yourself so you need an outside source to give it the life you inner child ever wanted.

There are many variables to look at this issue

Edited by SolarWarden

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It’s not down to trauma, plenty of traumatised people have children, infact most families are dysfunctional and traumatised. 

people are more conscious now and don’t want to just pop out kids Willy nilly.

people are having children when they feel ready, not because it’s what’s expected of them. 

A lot should be considered before having a child.  

it’s a huge responsibility and takes a toll on the woman.  Many girls don’t want to give away their youth to raising children. They want to travel and explore themselves, and find the right partner before committing themselves to a child.  They don’t want to be stuck with screaming kids and loosing sleep. 

people are having babies now In their late 20s and 30s..they have more wisdom and stability to give the child what it needs. 

of course if you are in a great situation with money and a strong relationship you are in a good position to have children.  

having a child should purely because you want to out of love.  Not because society says you should.  Or for any other agenda. 

Not having a child is one of the most renegade things a person can do and there are many reasons for it. 

 

 


 

 

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Is Not Wanting Children A Sign Of Trauma

It is a sign of intelligence IMO. Even if I was rich like Bill Gates I wouldn't want to have any kids. They take way too much of your time.

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Thing is that if you want kids you most likely want a wife. If you want to be married that is no a smart idea because the odds of getting divorced are 50%

Those are not good odds. Will you start a business with those odds? Would you jump off a plane with the parachute having those odds?

Marriage is serious thing. The odds are just not there for me to think that it is smart to get married.

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25 minutes ago, Arcangelo said:

Thing is that if you want kids you most likely want a wife. If you want to be married that is no a smart idea because the odds of getting divorced are 50%

Those are not good odds. Will you start a business with those odds? Would you jump off a plane with the parachute having those odds?

Marriage is serious thing. The odds are just not there for me to think that it is smart to get married.

I might be leaning a bit too much to the logical side but I'm with Arc. I'm open to changing my mind of course as it's hard to predict the future, but I just see no reason to get married.

I can always adopt and have a kid that way anyways which is what I plan to do. There are so many pluses to it over getting married and having a biological baby.

- I can give a kid a chance at a great life after they were dealt a bad hand

- I won't be contributing to making another human that taxes the Earth's ecosystem

- I can adopt alone regardless if I have a partner or not, and if I split up with a partner they can't steal them from me in court xD

It's a win-win-win! Anyways don't let society or culture gaslight you into thinking not having kids is wrong. You can do whatever you want with your body, and make your own life choices. There are too many people in the world anyways, and our economic system is getting increasingly fucked. There are countless reasons I'd argue why you SHOULDN'T have children, but I'm not going to push anyone to do or not do anything because I like freedom generally.

Edited by Roy

hrhrhtewgfegege

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1 hour ago, intotheblack said:


 

xDxDxD
Damn, that was harsh.

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Lol some people don't want children you foolish ingrates.  It's a choice it doesn't have to be based on trauma.  

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