Jenny's Journey Journal

[jennywise]

Ok, So today I'm starting this thing honestly half-heartedly due to being internally nagged that it's just another waste of time & that I should be coreographing new Zumba routines & listening to youtube videos on how to generate real estate leads. But no, shut-up nag self, I'm already doing it.  OK - SO let's see...  I'm thinking 2nd person voice will be best for this journal, esp. as everytime I say "I" , I'm identifying with the ego, so, yeah- I'll just address myself in the 2nd person- see how that works...OK today- where u at, girl?! 

Struggling with which path to take in letting myself be coached by my new favorite person, Mr. Leo.

Ok,Warning, Jen- U tend to idolize people you'd like to learn from- you just learned in his judgement video that u deem yourself beneath almost everyone bc youve decided everyone is more adept at life than u.   Mmmm I'm already criticizing myself- maybe 2nd person voice is not the way to go. Oh Dear GOD- just take notes!

Ok so I've loved the Enlightenment series so far- but it's making me question everything & I need to quickly start bringing an income into this house so I don't get thrown out. SO, just now listened to the "Stop judging yourself video, bc HellsBells do I do that like constantly! I think i'm going to listen to the how to love yourself one next. Lord knows I've spent at least the last ten years beating myself to a bloody pulp, so I could probably use some love... or am I just being lazy? probably, but I've already pissed half this day away so why the fuck not.  Yes- I'm apparently depressed too. whoohoo. Well that was totally unproductive journaling- Oh well, I'll do better tomorrow.