I feel terrible

[KaRzual]

Hey guys. I'm struggling with certain feeling (or whatever this is). This is happening much rarer lately but it's still a problem when it does. I feel massive anxiety. Something like panic, i feel doom. And i don't know why.

It happens mostly around people but not only. It happens also when i trip on shrooms or lsd. If i don't navigate my behaviour or thoughts i fall into this trap of incoming doom. 

I hate it. This is terrible. I feel miserable then, out of control and hopeless. 

I can't even name it, i can't even tell you guys what i'm having problem with. This is very hard for me. 

When i happens i feel massive tension. I feel not good enough. I feel sad and anger. I feel sorry for myself. I want to shout and run away. Everything pisses me off then and i can't be near people.

This happened on weddings before and other social gathering. I can't stand sitting and talking and doing this stuff. I feel massive anxiety. 

Guys i really want to hear something from you. What i wrote is pretty chaotic but i can't write that out more "properly". 

Does somebody have similiar experience? 

Why does this happen?

[KaRzual]

What is the answer? Be able to take care of myself 100% time? Like 100%? How?

[KaRzual]

Maybe that's becouse i care about their opinion too much? Focusing on myself would be btter option and experiencing myself without distortions?

[KaRzual]

Typing this out and thinking pretty much helped me - i feel like i care too much about others opinions and i drift away from myself. From myself which is sometimes chaotic, destructive and not cool. But that's cool. That's me. 

 

The question is - How can i  keep this focus on myself and live in that moment?> When i do that feels great. I feel alive. 

[Preety_India]

Looks like symptoms of generalized anxiety to me. 

Try to work on reducing your stress levels and getting good sleep... 

Ditch the LSD, maybe that's causing it. 

Do daily exercise.  

And don't care about what people think. Try to shut them out.