My peers aren't even doing consciousness work and their life seems better

[Bando]

@fopylo You're on the right track man, if your not constantly doubting yourself and questioning whether your gaslighting yourself, especially when your starting off it means your not doing it right, keep asking questions and always ask "am I really growing or am I deluding myself?" and adjust.

[fopylo]

@SamC Lol, well said. To do what makes me feel good is a good way to see it. The thing is that even though I might approach meditation with fear (which doesn't happen that much), I then enjoy it in the moment and it feels good and I forget about the fear.
I guess you're trying to say not to be attached to meditation as a way for me to escape, which is an escape in itself. However, I'm trying to build the habit, you see. And also I'm meditating not usually because I'm feeling a strong sense of fear in the moment, but because I know that if I take a lot of action of meditation then it will help me in the future deal with fear better, which is in itself a very light form of fear. But I mean, I need some kind of drive for the moment. I've been proven how powerful this method is for helping me deal with fear, and now, part of the reason why I do it is because I like it.
But yeah, most of the times after finishing a mindfulness session I tend to expect for the results and to see how my life is changing and how I'm more mindful, but this is actually becoming self conscious and neurotic, the opposite of mindfulness lmao. So after I finished my mindfulness session today I just got up, got on my bike, and started riding back home as if nothing happened and was thinking about my schoolwork and about my finances.

[diamondpenguin]

@fopylo If you devote yourself to some sort of work of yours: you will be much happier. Career, life purpose, business, is the most important thing in your life. Way more important than trying to become woke right now. That's why all the hippies and evangelicals fail to wake up. They have no serious career. Get a CAREER!!!

[fopylo]

@Reciprocality I've read what you wrote a few times. Very brilliant. So basically the reason they are more mindful is because they literally have less thinking going on because they feel this sense of security in their mind, because they've already set in stone a constructed identity by how people perceive them?
And on the other hand, I am aware of that, not set in stone but rather contemplating and having many questions that most people don't ask themselves - and because of that I have more thinking going on and that's why it's harder for me to be more mindful?
 

While that might be true, could it be said that in the long term I'll catch up to the level of mindfulness I see regular people have, and beyond that, and still be the contemplative person? Leo seems to be fitting there

[Kalki Avatar]

@fopylo Get financial freedom, then get enligthened. 

When you get the money you will also have the choice to free yourself from your cravings. You can use superficial spirituality like being present, grounding yourself in the present (principle), deep breathing, watching your thoughts, meditating and contemplating. Other than that you will waste your time and energy if your social and life situation is not supportive for awakening. 

Being an animal has its pros. You will be unsensitive to others energies and attacks from this concrete jungle. You have to fight in this World if you want to survive and earn a position for enligthenment. Unless you wanna be under others control. 

You better go directly from animal to GOD, than slowly going back and and forth, calling it "maturing your ego". Its just a waste of time. 

Edited April 20, 2021 by Kalki Avatar

[Reciprocality]

@fopylo Yes that is a fair representation, and if my assessment is right then what seems rather paradoxical at first is only causes to their effects.

Although these things comes in spectrums i think that what were somewhat a bell'curve at age 2 will trough development tilt more like a M shape, in which the distribution have two chunks of bodies. I would claim that almost all distributions which have a non-bellcurve shape are artificial, and that all artificial distributions are inefficient relative to ideals and that the ideal would constitute a curve back to the shape at age 2. Very much in harmony with ideals of authenticity and the return from the hero's journey, a return 'home' and a return to childhood.

I would hesitate to call the people you describe and i analysed as mindful, but to the extent they act easy-going and calm they do not nor have much discovered reason to second guess their algorithm thereto seem as tranquil as anyone. At high school i hung with the 'popular ones' (something i fright back upon) and what were so very curious is that the more self-conscious and second guessing they were speaking to me alone the more calm they were speaking with whichever quantity of many others. This despite how judgmental i never were, they seemingly weren't programmed with an algorithm for questions and answers like mine.

Exterior stimuli, lets say a conflicts like rumor and slander can disturb this group of people very much, and it is in like scenarios they can easily be discerned as mindless.

[fopylo]

@Kalki Avatar

17 minutes ago, Kalki Avatar said:

You can use superficial spirituality like being present, grounding yourself in the present (principle), deep breathing, watching your thoughts, meditating and contemplating.

Exactly! This is what I've been trying to say. It's sort of like using superficial spirituality in order to support foundational self help which then supports deep spirituality, if that makes sense. You see, the reason I even got started with spiritual practices is because I was so numb and could barely do a thing, like I had literally no power to move my body and use my mind which were bound by resistances. I HAD to free myself just a little so I could get going. Basic meditation was a start to unwire myself (but wasn't enough). I experienced dissociation for a long time and took me a long time to realize it (like 4 years). I could barely pursue success in this state. Recently I've started incorporating mindfulness and self acceptance meditations into my life, and OMG. I feel more in touch with reality and more grounded, almost like a child. This feeling of integration and not resisting what is, are very necessary and help me move and live normally.
But yeah, trying not to overdue it. Only using this much to get things going. People here tell me not to overdue it and become a hippy and spiritually bypass and all this. I just feel that I might need more of it as a foundational (not to escape).

 

27 minutes ago, Kalki Avatar said:

You have to fight in this World if you want to survive and earn a position for enligthenment.

Nice way of thinking. So basically most people go through life feeling this fake sense of security because they are numbed down and have a concrete identity given to them by society which makes them quite secretly fearful. And on the other hand we are putting ourselves vulnerably out there with the risk of being easily attacked, for that we will become stronger and achieve the real security which is not motivated by fear but by love. (If I got you right).

 

31 minutes ago, Kalki Avatar said:

You better go directly from animal to GOD

lmao

[KaRzual]

On 19.04.2021 at 6:00 PM, SamC said:

Yeah (:

@fopylo You´re scared of not being enough and therefore try to fix yourself. Do you notice however that you´re trying to avoid fear by raising your conciousness? I used the exact same tactic man...

I tried to cure my low self-esteem by meditating every single day ( forcing myself to do it). It became like an OCD where I had to do it in order to be enough and cure myself and where I had to become more conscious to solve my neurosis. But, the fact of the matter is this...

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU and the " needing to" mediate and raise your consciousness feeds into this negative feedback loop.

Look at this feedback loop model and you will see.

" I am not good enough " ------ " I need to change myself in order to be enough -------- I should meditate to change myself --------- If I don´t do this I will not be enough and then I will be unlovable, worthless or whatever"

This is what you´re doing. You think you´re solving your neurosis but you´re not. You are MAINTING IT, instead of solving it because you´re acting in accordance with it.

That said, you shouldn´t stop meditating because of fear of being driven by fear, because that will also feed into the dynamic of you not being good enough. Instead - meditate and do it and everything else in life because you love it and because it feels awesome and because you want to.

Discover what you want and then go after it, if that is getting girls, consciousness, success, money, or whatever pursue it. Let your inner compass be what makes you feel good, not the fear of not being good enough.

 

 

This guy got this right