PUA question: Dealing with multiple girls in same city

[StarStruck]

So recently I have been doing pickup. I got multiple girls numbers in the same city. 

Now I have to tell you I'm a shy and I just cringe at the idea of one of the girls seeing me with another one. I know I just shouldn't care.

I'm not exclusive with any of the girls. How should I approach the situation if I encounter one girl when I'm walking with another? The only dates possible right now is taking walks. 

Edit: typo

 

 

 

Edited April 13, 2021 by StarStruck

[JosephKnecht]

6 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

I'm not exclusive with any of the girls. How should I approach the situation if I encounter one girl when I'm walking with another? The only dates possible right now is talking walks. 

You introduce them to each other and pray to the Gods that they find each other attractive. 

[SamC]

2 hours ago, StarStruck said:

So recently I have been doing pickup. I got multiple girls numbers in the same city. 

Now I have to tell you I'm a shy and I just cringe at the idea of one of the girls seeing me with another one. I know I just shouldn't care.

I'm not exclusive with any of the girls. How should I approach the situation if I encounter one girl when I'm walking with another? The only dates possible right now is talking walks. 

 

 

 

Seeing multiple girls at the same time while not being in a committed relationship is great because it shows girls that you're abundant and have options. Don't shy away from being honest about that to the girls you date if they happen to ask.

If you meet one girl with another, introduce them to eachoter, play it cool and own it. It's not awkward, it's good and attractive.

 

Edited April 13, 2021 by SamC

[flowboy]

@StarStruck Great action taking! Congratulations! Progress that deserves to be celebrated.

Don't worry.

 

Edited April 13, 2021 by flowboy

[StarStruck]

2 hours ago, SamC said:

Seeing multiple girls at the same time while not being in a committed relationship is great because it shows girls that you're abundant and have options. Don't shy away from being honest about that to the girls you date if they happen to ask.

If you meet one girl with another, introduce them to eachoter, play it cool and own it. It's not awkward, it's good and attractive.

 

I don't know about introducing them to each other. I could do that but what if I don't want that. Is saying hi without small talk enough? Or would that be rude? 

 

6 minutes ago, flowboy said:

@StarStruck Great action taking! Congratulations! Progress that deserves to be celebrated.

Don't worry.

 

Thanks. I'm having g success but until now I'm aiming below my league until I get comfortable and get a good foundation. Talking to smoking hot girls is still an issue for me. A lot of them reject me. I think they don't like my appearance. 

[flowboy]

@StarStruck No actually you don't like your appearance, and they sense that and just aren't going to indulge that lack of self-acceptance.

Don't worry, all in due time

[SamC]

1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

I don't know about introducing them to each other. I could do that but what if I don't want that. Is saying hi without small talk enough? Or would that be rude? 

I mean If you are forced to talk to one. You could just say hi and smile and than just go on your way but that depends really on what sort of relationship you have with the girl you would " meet" on the street.

I mean if you have a super close connection to that girl, than she even might be the one wanting to small talk with you. It's very context sensitive.

Edited April 13, 2021 by SamC

[StarStruck]

1 hour ago, flowboy said:

@StarStruck No actually you don't like your appearance, and they sense that and just aren't going to indulge that lack of self-acceptance.

Don't worry, all in due time

Thanks for that insight. I noticed that too. Women have strong third eye or something. They pick that up.  I think some even pick up that I'm miserable deep inside although  but somehow they are OK with because I'm a good conversationalist, funny and I listen. 

[aurum]

11 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I know I just shouldn't care.

Why do you care?

Introspect on that belief. Why is it bad if a girl you picked up sees you with another girl you picked up?

Don’t go for the right answer, look for the answer that feels true for you.

Maybe it’s that if they see you with another girl, she will think you’re a fuckboy / player and not want to date you. Or maybe you’re afraid to see yourself that way.

Dig on that and things will be clearer.

[StarStruck]

5 hours ago, aurum said:

Why do you care?

Introspect on that belief. Why is it bad if a girl you picked up sees you with another girl you picked up?

Don’t go for the right answer, look for the answer that feels true for you.

Maybe it’s that if they see you with another girl, she will think you’re a fuckboy / player and not want to date you. Or maybe you’re afraid to see yourself that way.

Dig on that and things will be clearer.

It has probably has to do with the scarcity vs abundance mindset in the grander scheme. It also has to do that I'm socially awkward in social interactions that are more than 1 vs 1; I don't know how to deal with such social situation in a graceful manner. It is a matter of lack of experience.

At the core I'm afraid I will lose these girls but now that I'm thinking about it I don't need to be afraid about losing fish now that I know how to catch fish.

I always afraid of doing day game, I made a breakthrough in the last 2 weeks. A lot of rejections, and I'm linking that to "I'm ugly". It is very hard to unwind that.

[StarStruck]

With pickup you can learn so much about yourself. The lessons I learned about myself can be applied to other areas in my life.

[flowboy]

23 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Thanks for that insight. I noticed that too. Women have strong third eye or something. They pick that up.  I think some even pick up that I'm miserable deep inside although  but somehow they are OK with because I'm a good conversationalist, funny and I listen. 

@StarStruck They are attracted to how you feel inside. To whether you are emotionally healthy, and able to self-generate and sustain positive emotions in the face of challenge. That's why they test you by insulting you. If they say that you are fat or too short, and you are clearly not hurt at all (this must be genuine, third eye again), and respond with a joke, fun and lightheartedness, then to them that is a successful experiment they did on you, where you proved that you can handle the obstacles and challenges that life tends to throw at you, and keep your spirits up and keep going, without ending up stuck in some emotional ditch. That means that if she were to attach herself to you, and let you lead her through life, she would be safe and survive and thrive with you.

It all makes sense.

Being a good conversationalist, funny, and listening, are all symptoms of the underlying emotional health and resilience that they are looking for.

That's also why outer game works at first, but then inner game shines through and determines whether she considers you a good choice long term.

Don't worry, you'll get laid without having great inner game. And that in itself (you reaching a goal you chose for yourself) can also contribute to you feeling better about yourself, believing in your abilities, and developing that emotional health and resilience that makes you genuinely attractive.

Edited April 14, 2021 by flowboy

[flowboy]

13 hours ago, StarStruck said:

A lot of rejections, and I'm linking that to "I'm ugly". It is very hard to unwind that.

Just keep going. Eventually you will get girls who are into you and tell you that you are handsome. If that happens enough, you'll believe it. You'll find out that there is no objective pretty/ugly for guys, and how much she likes your personality mostly determines how physically attractive she perceives you as.

Also, do strength training, get a girl to take you shopping and teach you to dress well, shave or neatly trim your beard and hair, smell good and then just don't worry about it.

[StarStruck]

On 14-4-2021 at 9:52 PM, flowboy said:

Just keep going. Eventually you will get girls who are into you and tell you that you are handsome. If that happens enough, you'll believe it. You'll find out that there is no objective pretty/ugly for guys, and how much she likes your personality mostly determines how physically attractive she perceives you as.

Also, do strength training, get a girl to take you shopping and teach you to dress well, shave or neatly trim your beard and hair, smell good and then just don't worry about it.

I'm already more buffed than the average guy, I'm tall, and dress already better than most people. The thing is that I'm Turkish in an European country. Some girls like that but also a lot of them don't like it. I look friendly but some do get surprised when being approached.

 

On 14-4-2021 at 9:43 PM, flowboy said:

@StarStruck They are attracted to how you feel inside. To whether you are emotionally healthy, and able to self-generate and sustain positive emotions in the face of challenge. That's why they test you by insulting you. If they say that you are fat or too short, and you are clearly not hurt at all (this must be genuine, third eye again), and respond with a joke, fun and lightheartedness, then to them that is a successful experiment they did on you, where you proved that you can handle the obstacles and challenges that life tends to throw at you, and keep your spirits up and keep going, without ending up stuck in some emotional ditch. That means that if she were to attach herself to you, and let you lead her through life, she would be safe and survive and thrive with you.

It all makes sense.

Being a good conversationalist, funny, and listening, are all symptoms of the underlying emotional health and resilience that they are looking for.

That's also why outer game works at first, but then inner game shines through and determines whether she considers you a good choice long term.

Don't worry, you'll get laid without having great inner game. And that in itself (you reaching a goal you chose for yourself) can also contribute to you feeling better about yourself, believing in your abilities, and developing that emotional health and resilience that makes you genuinely attractive.

I'm too much in my head (judging myself) instead of being in my heart (understanding myself). Judging also causes me to approach less, take less action and be reserved. My successes happened in the last 2 weeks so I'm not even long in the game but I have been overanalyzing myself. I do get insights from analyzing my approaches/conversations but there is a lot of time going in this and my LP is suffering because of it. I'm a thinker and not a doer. Making the switch to being practical (taking actions) instead of being theoretical (analyzing, researching, learning pickup) is a struggle for me. The ratio right now is 20%/80%. It should be the other way around but that is not me. I feel like I would leave a lot of lessons on the table if I analyze less and use that spare time to approach.

Edited April 16, 2021 by StarStruck