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UnlovingGod

Hello, it's God himself

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Im awakened to fucking everything. My ego has shut down its connection to love. The universe said to me very explicitly, I just need a little patience and then I will get high on love. Thats all.

God's Ego is out and materialized into this post ha.

Edited by UnlovingGod

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I can see the end. I realised that I wanted to kill and I was in denial of that. A load of love released because of that and light shines through. Ive got a new starting point of deconstruction. I can now recontextualize my childhood from being a victim to being a pretator or a rebel, which still has problems, but it is a process.

Edited by UnlovingGod

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Yeah, big shit is happening right now, should probably change my user, but I like the edgy quality of it. And I was thinking about the cult psychology problem in this forum and the comments. Leo if you are reading this, dont shut it down, it is very helpful to understand what is going on with your community, because by shutting it down, cult psychology will still exist, you cant prevent cult psychology by shutting down its media  it is like the drug problem. You criminalize the marlket but it will hoop out at the other end of the market.

Edited by UnlovingGod

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Your intution gets so astronomical big that you dont necessarily need to meditate or that shit or you need to see meditating way more relative. The more intuitive the more god can help you. Its imposssible to embody everything from one swoop thats just not infinite. What leo helped me is getting developing a language so i can think in lines of god and infinite but really, the point you r born, you r in infinite communication with god. A song that stuck today is navajo joe. The rain and the wind today, i was able to see god. And thinking as god speaking, god was thinking. Then thinking becomes non dualistic. And im so fucking young. So young and so wise and so arrogant and so loving and so egoistic and infinite. I am so infinite. I am an infinite question with an infinite awnser.

Edited by UnlovingGod

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So, that was a hell of a journey since. A particular dream that had that stuck with me, was being in a car that drove over a cliff and the breaks were loose, thats how I felt the last two to three years and Im finally settling to a more ordinary life, which I long longed for.  The psicosis I had... three fucking months... now it`s almost two years since I had it... WOW... There´s no way back. It will stick with me the rest of my life as long as I want to be God counciouss. A psychic scar, well it doesnt bleed anymore, it maybe feels a little itchy right now, but I can move my mind. Soooo much was reveiled to me in my psicosis that I cant communicate to anyone, thats the scar thats still itching... it´s absolute solpisism, but what it´s there to be human and not to comunicate three months of severe psicosis. The one year and a half after that was brutal, my mind was pouring blood. And now I´m kinda relaxed, tapping into love, but with a lot of cautios, I know it can turn ugly real quick, as riding the wave of infinite love is the king of all waves.

Hitler had infinite love for Germany and brought doom to the universe as I had infinite love for a girl, that may never be ever there, escaping shit until her silhouette disapearse in the magnitudes of the forgotten never to be imagined again.

And dealing with life, finding new ways to cope, as the human condition is a big coping scheme and it finally turns to acceptence and surrender to the ways of life. I´m happy, quite happy to be honest, I´m good at what I´m doing, I´m good at life. What more to ask for? Be arrogant to society, be humble to god. Trust yourself as you are god. After massacring myself, terrorizing every inch of my mind, I can now wait for my whole life to unfold itself as being the unfolder. 

And knowing that the love for this girl will never be forgotten, as I have seen god for the first time through her. God you are a sick fuck, thank you...

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On 8.4.2021 at 9:35 PM, UnlovingGod said:

Im awakened to fucking everything. My ego has shut down its connection to love. The universe said to me very explicitly, I just need a little patience and then I will get high on love. Thats all.

God's Ego is out and materialized into this post ha.

Yeah, the psicosis I had was literally the love bomb, as I was high on pure dopamine serotonine oxcitocine and endorphines. Never again please

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DJANGOavatars-000027559099-v2ytvc-t500x500.jpg

Django
Django, have you always been alone?
Django
Django, have you never loved again?
Love will live on
Life must go on
For you cannot spend your life regreatting

Django
Django, you must face another day
Django
Django, now your love has gone away
Once you loved her
Now you've lost her
But you've lost her forever, Django

When there are clouds in the skies and they are grey
You may be sad, but remember they'll all soon pass away
Oh Django, after the showers the sun will be shining

Once you loved her
Now you've lost her
But you've lost her forever, Django

When there are clouds in the skies and they are grey
You may be sad, but remember they'll all soon pass away
Oh Django, after the showers the sun will be shining

Django
Oh, oh, oh, Django
You must go on
Oh, oh, oh, Django

NAVAJO JOE

When two lonely man come across,

Defied by all the odds,

And one shows his clock,

And just wants from me one hundred notes.

I shot my shot of love,

He falls, but it hit my love

on the other side of the world,

And now my heart belongs,

For a loss that doesnt respond.

And so I must go on,

Awoke and alone with the steps I take groven into stone

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1 hour ago, UnlovingGod said:

Yeah, the psicosis I had was literally the love bomb, as I was high on pure dopamine serotonine oxcitocine and endorphines. Never again please

All the pleasures in the world don't amount to nothing, when you are totally disconnected from god. It feels like hell even if it's the greatest drug ever. I even desired couple months before the psicosis, that I just want a pure cocktail of all those good neurotransmitors. After I awoken to the intervoweness of counciousness and Love before and that Love was the substance of counciousness, I just thought, why couldnt I just give myself all the juicy neurotransmitors. Well, I got, what I desired, trough just channeling all my love to a particular girl. I took some shrooms without going in with a straight plan and this girl just popped up like a cinemascreen in the nightsky waiting for me in a trainstation. That's when all hell broke loose. Even a couple months before, but some time after the awakenings I smoked some weed with a blank mind and it felt just so natural, writing her, how she was doing, so we wrote for a couple months, without any serious intentions. The Backstory with This girl was, that I had a crush before all the awakenings on her, and she was the first girl, where I had the courage to tell her my feelings and she dumped and I felt like shit, but I got out of it, as I had soon another romantic relationship, that was kinda halfhearted and didnt take so long and after some weeks, that's when I smoked the weed and just wanted write her, how she was doing, as she was still for me an interesting person and she was I think still quite flattered, that she was the first girl I openly shared my feelings.

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But now on the god is great medition grindset B|, nah jokes not taking anything to forcefully, but yeah just putting the attention on the greatness of god, after all those goddamn awakenings just feels great.

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