SirVladimir's 2-Month Summary: Going To Hell, Reflections, Life Purpose

[Guest SirVladimir]

I thought it'd be a good idea to summarize the past two months.

First of all, I’ve been to hell. I felt completely powerless. Every moment was infinite, and each was hell. Tick. Tock. Reality was spun out of control. There was no one at the steering wheel. An exodus of control. I couldn’t do a thing against it. If I were thrown into a black van somewhere in Brazil, drugged and handcuffed and tortured alive, I couldn’t do anything against the reality in front of me. It was terrible. I was crying for this too-understanding, yet too-resisting state of consciousness to end. I couldn’t look past the truth: There were moments of reconciliation, and there were moments of petrifying suffering. That’s how it felt. And I was forever oscillating between the two. I would never leave the endless cycle. The universe was forever healing. I was so naked. Terrified. I was crying for God’s mercy at that point.

However, this resulted in coming to an inner heaven where I realized that suffering is self-inflicted. This means that you don’t have to fear infinite hell because everyone and everything eventually ends up on God’s side. God is all-forgiving and all-merciful. God accepts everyone and everything without exception. God is there with you whatever you are going through. The devil never truly wins, for everyone and everything is under God’s protection. This is your one and only birthright: To live with, to meet, and to be God. Whatever is happening to you is a part of God by definition, for God is everything. There will be times of resistance, and therefore suffering, but they are ALWAYS finite because the devil eventually surrenders to God – because the devil is God and when the suffering gets too overwhelming, close to infinite, the devil just gives up and comes back home.

The infinity is stillness. Nothing is really moving. A human self creates the illusion of a single perspective moving through time, but that’s only because this one perspective stands upon neglecting and suppressing everything else. Because everything is happening simultaneously AND because Infinity is everything, nothing is really “moving” into the future. You’re just shape-shifting. Remember that movie Cube from the late 1990s? Infinity is like that big cube, carrying all those little cubes, i.e. perspectives. It’s shape-shifting.

This has resulted in, so far, a conflicting understanding - On the one hand, I have realized that suffering is self-inflicted. Every hellish realm exists as pure abstraction, in potentiality, but it doesn’t have to happen. God never asks you to experience hell. He gives you the freedom to do so, but it’s never an obligation. You will be in hell as long as you resist, i.e. be a devil, i.e. hold on to your human identity. On the other hand, there's the eternal-and-infinite aspect of God. As deep as my realizations have gone, I'm therefore still unsure about the notion of experiencing all pain and suffering, as in the illusory first-person view. There’s a blank space in my head regarding insights about that, as I know everything exists as infinite potentiality and can happen. The mind is so powerful that simply by ruminating about these infinite hellish thoughts one is effectively living them. Not metaphorically, but literally. 

This leads me to a sort of climax of this post: Your life purpose. If you are unclear about your life purpose, I can tell you right now what it is — to find a way to reflect the most love on/to yourself. The world is a mirror, so the keen of you discern why I am chuckling as I write. Reflect love and inspire.

And here is one of the more pragmatic lessons, Coca-Cola Lite edition, I have learned: Spending prolonged periods of time in a purely logical environment, such as coding a script, has broad implications when you come back to a more abstract and inconsistent environment, such as designing a product or writing a story as vividly as possible. You'd think that mastering a skill comes from sharpening it every day and night, and while that is true, by taking a break and engaging in a pure logical and efficiency-driven environment, you come back more focused than ever, able to eliminate unnecessary 'knots' in your work that are actually preventing it from blossoming into its full potential and vividity. Simply: Mastery of function can help develop form.

At last, I feel very happy where Journeys Beyond Earth has been heading since my departure. I have overcome 2,000 hours in writing, aiming for that preliminary (and abstract) notion of 10,000 hours. Although I would move faster if I wrote in Czech, the idea of writing in a worldwide language is an exciting one and the one that includes all of you. I have also given up on pigeon-holing people into ideal readers and the ones that ought to deny my work, as this stance turns out to be unsustainable and unaligned. I feel I'm in my inner meditations slowly but surely alluding to a way that would propel my work into the world, though the breakthrough is still a mile away.

I hope your paths are as exciting and unpredictable as mine... Love, beloved humans, for we are a mirror pretending to be fragmented into shards. But like rays of the sun, our fates meet at one point.

 

Edited April 1, 2021 by SirVladimir

[WonderSeeker]

1 hour ago, SirVladimir said:

You'd think that mastering a skill comes from sharpening it every day and night, and while that is true, by taking a break and engaging in a pure logical and efficiency-driven environment, you come back more focused than ever, able to eliminate unnecessary 'knots' in your work that are actually preventing it from blossoming into its full potential and vividity.

Nice post. Can you elaborate more on what you mean by a 'logical/efficiency-driven environment' as opposed to spending time on a project? I'm probably misunderstanding what you mean, but a logical environment sounds tiresome and unbalanced for the mind.  

[Willie]

1 hour ago, SirVladimir said:

I thought it'd be a good idea to summarize the past two months.

First of all, I’ve been to hell. I felt completely powerless. Every moment was infinite, and each was hell. Tick. Tock. Reality was spun out of control. There was no one at the steering wheel. An exodus of control. I couldn’t do a thing against it. If I were thrown into a black van somewhere in Brazil, drugged and handcuffed and tortured alive, I couldn’t do anything against the reality in front of me. It was terrible. I was crying for this too-understanding, yet too-resisting state of consciousness to end. I couldn’t look past the truth: There were moments of reconciliation, and there were moments of petrifying suffering. That’s how it felt. And I was forever oscillating between the two. I would never leave the endless cycle. The universe was forever healing. I was so naked. Terrified. I was crying for God’s mercy at that point.

However, this resulted in coming to an inner heaven where I realized that suffering is self-inflicted. This means that you don’t have to fear infinite hell because everyone and everything eventually ends up on God’s side. God is all-forgiving and all-merciful. God accepts everyone and everything without exception. God is there with you whatever you are going through. The devil never truly wins, for everyone and everything is under God’s protection. This is your one and only birthright: To live with, to meet, and to be God. Whatever is happening to you is a part of God by definition, for God is everything. There will be times of resistance, and therefore suffering, but they are ALWAYS finite because the devil eventually surrenders to God – because the devil is God and when the suffering gets too overwhelming, close to infinite, the devil just gives up and comes back home.

The infinity is stillness. Nothing is really moving. A human self creates the illusion of a single perspective moving through time, but that’s only because this one perspective stands upon neglecting and suppressing everything else. Because everything is happening simultaneously AND because Infinity is everything, nothing is really “moving” into the future. You’re just shape-shifting. Remember that movie Cube from the late 1990s? Infinity is like that big cube, carrying all those little cubes, i.e. perspectives. It’s shape-shifting.

This has resulted in, so far, a conflicting understanding - On the one hand, I have realized that suffering is self-inflicted. Every hellish realm exists as pure abstraction, in potentiality, but it doesn’t have to happen. God never asks you to experience hell. He gives you the freedom to do so, but it’s never an obligation. You will be in hell as long as you resist, i.e. be a devil, i.e. hold on to your human identity. On the other hand, there's the eternal-and-infinite aspect of God. As deep as my realizations have gone, I'm therefore still unsure about the notion of experiencing all pain and suffering, as in the illusory first-person view. There’s a blank space in my head regarding insights about that, as I know everything exists as infinite potentiality and can happen. The mind is so powerful that simply by ruminating about these infinite hellish thoughts one is effectively living them. Not metaphorically, but literally. 

This leads me to a sort of climax of this post: Your life purpose. If you are unclear about your life purpose, I can tell you right now what it is — to find a way to reflect the most love on/to yourself. The world is a mirror, so the keen of you discern why I am chuckling as I write. Reflect love and inspire.

And here is one of the more pragmatic lessons, Coca-Cola Lite edition, I have learned: Spending prolonged periods of time in a purely logical environment, such as coding a script, has broad implications when you come back to a more abstract and inconsistent environment, such as designing a product or writing a story as vividly as possible. You'd think that mastering a skill comes from sharpening it every day and night, and while that is true, by taking a break and engaging in a pure logical and efficiency-driven environment, you come back more focused than ever, able to eliminate unnecessary 'knots' in your work that are actually preventing it from blossoming into its full potential and vividity. Simply: Mastery of function can help develop form.

At last, I feel very happy where Journeys Beyond Earth has been heading since my departure. I have overcome 2,000 hours in writing, aiming for that preliminary (and abstract) notion of 10,000 hours. Although I would move faster if I wrote in Czech, the idea of writing in a worldwide language is an exciting one and the one that includes all of you. I have also given up on pigeon-holing people into ideal readers and the ones that ought to deny my work, as this stance turns out to be unsustainable and unaligned. I feel I'm in my inner meditations slowly but surely alluding to a way that would propel my work into the world, though the breakthrough is still a mile away.

I hope your paths are as exciting and unpredictable as mine... Love, beloved humans, for we are a mirror pretending to be fragmented into shards. But like rays of the sun, our fates meet at one point.

 

Nice to hear from you again, that’s quite an update! Sorry it includes being in hell (though, as you found out, it is a choice) and I’m glad you got past it.

[Guest SirVladimir]

6 hours ago, WonderSeeker said:

Can you elaborate more on what you mean by a 'logical/efficiency-driven environment' as opposed to spending time on a project? I'm probably misunderstanding what you mean, but a logical environment sounds tiresome and unbalanced for the mind.  

Very well. What drives people like me is the freedom we get from our creative labor — we don't like being controlled much, we sort of chase pouring our hearts into a stream of words, paintings, etc. But over the course of this action, what seems clear to us may become convoluted to others — and that is why you need proper editing skills to 'clear out' your work afterwards. By mixing your creative labor with periods of time spent in a purely logic-driven environment (such as programming a script, drawing out mind maps and diagrams, scrutinizing the most effective way to reach the solution) will also develop intuition for editing your creative work, making it more enjoyable and clear to others. Logic and creative labor are, of course, deeply intertwined, but I like to work at their extreme ends. So a purely logical environment may seem tiresome in the long run, but as a creative writer you aren't there for the long run anyway. You'll need to have a zest for it, though. These are occasional 'logical capsules' that you immerse yourself in, and they actually propel your creativity even beyond — because when you finally return to crafting a plot, structuralizing paragraphs, or simply describing a scene, you'll be able to 'cut to the chase' a lot faster.

[Michael569]

@SirVladimir why hello there and welcome back old friend  

[seeking_brilliance]

@SirVladimir I'm glad you are feeling more at ease. Also, I'm loving the advice on creative writing. I think the high stress and focus of my business kinda creates that balance for me. 

Also, nice threads ?

 

[Guest SirVladimir]

@seeking_brilliance Yes. But I also understand why that lesson was necessary. Before I experienced the serene side, I had plunged into a dark realm of thoughts and gotten entangled in my own web. I'll study surrender even more now. It's a leap of faith, you think — before you make the jump. 

2 hours ago, seeking_brilliance said:

Also, nice threads ?

The suit arrived two days ago from Germany. I had to put it on like a neanderthal without a proper shirt. 

[_Archangel_]

@SirVladimirWow! sincerely inspired by what you wrote(with a pleasant style too)
I wanted to ask you: What are the core spiritual practices that have led/are leading you to this realizations?

[Guest SirVladimir]

@_Archangel_ The heaven/hell happened on an LSA trip, the rest I get from shamanic breathing or trataka or a simple contemplation.

Edited April 1, 2021 by SirVladimir

[WaveInTheOcean]

Beautiful. Realizing that even the experience of hell is infinite love is one of the profoundest most beautiful mindfucks.

[Guest SirVladimir]

@WaveInTheOcean Yes, but getting to it is the ugly part. 

[WaveInTheOcean]

15 minutes ago, SirVladimir said:

@WaveInTheOcean Yes, but getting to it is the ugly part. 

Indeed. Very very very ugly. The more ugly/hellish it is/was, the more profound the mindfuck when it hits you your depression/'going-through-hell' was Infinite Love/your own doing/a deliberate choice (to learn and grow).

[Guest SirVladimir]

2 hours ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

Indeed. Very very very ugly. The more ugly/hellish it is/was, the more profound the mindfuck when it hits you your depression/'going-through-hell' was Infinite Love/your own doing/a deliberate choice (to learn and grow).

YEAP that's the thing. Very well said. You think you have lost all will and hope, when in fact it's been deliberate the entire time. But the moment you realize that, there's no turning back, as you become stunned by pure understanding. Having infinite free will is reasurring, yet simultaneously gives rise to things like ego, and therefore fear - which is, when you think about it, the point. Although I know this - that salvation ultimately awaits in the end - in my baseline consciousness I am still connected to the ego, and therefore fear the outlook of deliberately choosing suffering; of experiencing all the ugly things such as being boiled alive or held captive for decades. 

Edited April 1, 2021 by SirVladimir

[WonderSeeker]

15 hours ago, SirVladimir said:

[W]hat seems clear to us may become convoluted to others — and that is why you need proper editing skills to 'clear out' your work afterwards. By mixing your creative labor with periods of time spent in a purely logic-driven environment (such as programming a script, drawing out mind maps and diagrams, scrutinizing the most effective way to reach the solution) will also develop intuition for editing your creative work, making it more enjoyable and clear to others. These are occasional 'logical capsules' that you immerse yourself in, and they actually propel your creativity even beyond — because when you finally return to crafting a plot, structuralizing paragraphs, or simply describing a scene, you'll be able to 'cut to the chase' a lot faster.

@SirVladimir Understood. Do you employ this insight as a strategy for deliberately editing your works when you think you've finished?

For example, say you finish a writing draft. Do you then take two weeks off, doing something totally unrelated (e.g., drawing mind maps), and then come back to the draft and clean/dress it up to make it more robust? I'm asking, because I'm beginning to write my first ever book/booklet, and I want to make sure that I don't fall into some silly creative-rut. Much love & keep on keeping on, fellow creator! ~

[Heart of Space]

I went through the same experience last year same approximate time frame.

The second time you go to hell for the sake of spiritual progress you are allowed to consent to it.  At least in my case it is.  Good luck if you choose to round 2.  Hells a tough teacher, understatement of the century I know.  

[Guest SirVladimir]

@WonderSeeker Yes, but the environmental switch happens in hours or days instead of weeks, personally. Good luck with your book. What's it gonna be about? 

@Heart of Space Hell is certainly a wake-up call and quick sobering up from your first mystical beer.

Edited April 2, 2021 by SirVladimir