Teal swan - what a woman needs from a man in a relationship

[mmKay]

2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

@StarStruck

How does it make logical sense to be happy around someone who mistreats you? I just can't wrap my head around this toxic way of thinking. 

They wanna get treated like dirt? 

 

 

Because it's a common stereotype of girls. I'm sure you've heard " Oh she had daddy issues " 

It just refers to a girl that "feels home" with drama and abuse because of a certain upbringing pattern , which hinders their ability for healthy relationships later on

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, mmKay said:

Because it's a common stereotype of girls. I'm sure you've heard " Oh she had daddy issues " 

It just refers to a girl that "feels home" with drama and abuse because of a certain upbringing pattern , which hinders their ability for healthy relationships later on

But that's not healthy. Why not look for women who want a healthy dynamic? 

 

[StarStruck]

@Preety_India

A woman who was disrespected by her dad won't go looking around for a guy who has the same qualities. She will be UNCONSCIOUSLY attracted to such a guy.

If your dad was respectful and loving to you, that is great for you. And I'm happy for you. This means that you won't allow a guy to mistreat you, which is good.

Personally I want to end up with a woman who is healthy but in the mean time I want to date and a lot of women are messed up. I'm just trying to understand women and what makes them horny.

Edited March 7, 2021 by StarStruck

[ginger28]

17 hours ago, intotheblack said:

 

The last part really hit me, because recently I got my first real girlfriend(me 22, her 20) and although she was my dream girl and we had a great 2 months, at the end she said she couldnt be herself around me and she felt like my mother. I also felt that I couldnt give her containment in so many ways(organizing dates, ordering the drinks, calling the taxi, communicating confidently how I feel about her bad behaviour) and that actually she was giving me containment. She was the rational leader. I knew it wasn't natural and it would ruin the relationship. I knew I should parent myself, since I didnt get that as a child(absent father and other things). But I was pretty insecure around her, was even afraid to show my personality. I felt she was wiser than me and I couldnt do much but watch her lose interest and get frustrated. Now I'm researching anxious attachment style, self-love, masculinity and so forth, going regularly to therapy, reading books, I wanna learn everything I should have learned as a child. I wanna do everything in my power to grow. I dont wanna feel like a kid, but like a man.

[Leo Gura]

@ginger28 Nothing will get a girl to dump you faster than lack of leadership, indecisiveness, and insecurity, which forces her to be the leader.

Tisk, tisk.

You gotta get your shit together and take charge of the situation. You lead she follows.

[Preety_India]

Women prefer to follow and usually like men to provide containment 

No woman that I know likes to take all decisions meanwhile the man sits on a couch. 

I mean that woman has got to be super domineering or something. 

But such women don't make the majority. 

 

[ginger28]

8 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

No woman that I know likes to take all decisions meanwhile the man sits on a couch. 

I am aware that the man must organize the dates and I usually do, but it was quite unfortunate, because in my country it was extremly cold for a long time, so no going on walks(its never this cold). And all possible indoor options were closed by the government. So we couldnt see each other unless she invited me to her place or we went to a few illegally opened bars that she knew. I did invite her to my place a few times, invited her to my friends board game night and to the park once it got a bit warmer. But 80% of the time she picked the place and invited other people. My close friends were mostly busy and out of town, so I couldnt invite anyone. So that 80% was just unfortunate.

Now that everything is open and the wheather is warmer thats not gonna be a problem for me, but yea bad timing. Also should probably learn how to organize social gatherings with people that dont know each other

[Hulia]

14 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Women prefer to follow and usually like men to provide containment 

No woman that I know likes to take all decisions meanwhile the man sits on a couch. 

No human being likes to take all decisions and bear responsibility for all the possible mistakes but would rather prefer to sit on a couch and relax. But the half of human beings, called men, is forced to take decisions because of gender role allocation. That´s all.

[Preety_India]

Just now, Hulia said:

No human being likes to take all decisions and bear responsibility for all the possible mistakes but would rather prefer to sit on a couch and relax. But the half of human beings, called men, is forced to take decisions because of gender role allocation. That´s all.

I think a lot of men like to take decisions because it makes them feel good.. More confident. 

 

[Hulia]

17 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

I think a lot of men like to take decisions because it makes them feel good.. More confident. 

 

The same with the women. It´s just a matter of experience. You are always more confident wit the things which you do frequently. Women have less experience of taking decisions than men, that´s why they might be less confident. And not because of the difference in brains or genitals.

Edited March 7, 2021 by Hulia

[Preety_India]

Just now, Hulia said:

The same with the women. It´s just a matter of experience. You are always more confident wit the things which you do frequently. Women have less experience of taking decisions than men, that´s why they might be less confident. And not because of the difference in brains of genitals.

I think it's more of a preference for women. Even if they took the best decisions in each situation they want a man they find to be dependable and protective. 

After all the man is going to be the father of her kids. So they don't want an unreliable weak father around their children. 

 

[Hulia]

9 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

I think it's more of a preference for women. Even if they took the best decisions in each situation they want a man they find to be dependable and protective. 

After all the man is going to be the father of her kids. So they don't want an unreliable weak father around their children. 

 

It`s an illusion. No human being is perfectly reliable. Somebody as strong as a rock may collapse tomorrow under the pressure of internal or external circumstances. Who knows.

[Preety_India]

11 minutes ago, Hulia said:

It`s an illusion. No human being is perfectly reliable. Somebody as strong as a rock may collapse tomorrow under the pressure of internal or external circumstances. Who knows.

  I'm not talking about someone who is perfectly reliable. But a woman is going to prefer a more reliable secure confident man to be the parent of her kids as compared to someone who is less reliable.

 

[Mannyb]

11 hours ago, Emerald said:

I don't have any book recommendations.

But my main advice involves connecting with the subtlety of authentic masculine energy... which always comes from the inside out and not the outside in. So, the best thing a man can do is to release attachments and aversions to cultural ideas of masculinity and to dive into himself and develop what is simply there.

So, it's more of a subtractive process, than it is an additive process. 

If a man's masculinity comes from the outside in, he will inadvertently shift himself away from his natural masculinity and it will take on a farcical and loud quality. And this "outside in" masculinity is often the thing that carries the lemon juice to women's feminine wounding because these cultural ideas around masculinity are often informed by the things that created the feminine wounding to begin with.

By contrast, "Inside out" masculinity is just very authentic to the particular man. And a woman will feel into a particular man to see whether or not he is a match to her. And it's a lot more down to Earth feeling. 

Have you read David Deida? He goes much deeper than what you are talking about here. I won’t even begin to describe it, just read it. I’m sure you’d love it ? He’s all about masculine feminine energy & opening as love, it’s truly amazing ?? He approaches sex from the POV of awareness, giving life long practices for enlightened sexual living. Fucking life as ❤️

Edited March 7, 2021 by Mannyb

[Hulia]

1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

  I'm not talking about someone who is perfectly reliable. But a woman is going to prefer a more reliable secure confident man to be the parent of her kids as compared to someone who is less reliable.

 

There is no guarantee that a secure confident man will be a better father than insecure and unconfident one. None. 

Besides confidence is a soft skill which can be learned and developed. Much more important is the hardware. 

I cannot grasp, that Leo is teaching you such a superficial stuff here. 

[Preety_India]

Just now, Hulia said:

There is no guarantee that a secure confident man will be a better father than insecure and unconfident one. None. 

Besides confidence is a soft skill which can be learned and developed. Much more important is the hardware. 

I cannot grasp, that Leo is teaching you such a superficial stuff here. 

What sort of hardware are you referring to? 

 

[Hulia]

Just now, Preety_India said:

What sort of hardware are you referring to? 

 

I mean, some basic qualities of a human being or in this context of a man. As for example open-mindedness, compassion, good nature, ability to observe to love... 

[Preety_India]

Just now, Hulia said:

I mean, some basic qualities of a human being or in this context of a man. As for example open-mindedness, compassion, good nature, ability to observe to love... 

I get your point that a man who is compassionate can develop skills and confidence. 

The priority at least when it concerns me is always be his character first. And confidence later. 

 

[zeroISinfinity]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

@ginger28 Nothing will get a girl to dump you faster than lack of leadership, indecisiveness, and insecurity, which forces her to be the leader.

Tisk, tisk.

You gotta get your shit together and take charge of the situation. You lead she follows.

✔️

Sidenote:Will never date Teal Swan, like ever. 

[zeroISinfinity]

Can't wait for zero you are afraid of women like that. 

No I am not, it's just not worth the effort.

Edited March 7, 2021 by zeroISinfinity