My Near Death Experience

[Chance Cunningham]

My near death experience.

I rarely speak of it and when I have shared it, friends/family didn't want to believe it. I share here because Leo's words resonate with that experience. About ten years ago on a Sunday afternoon, I was a few short breaths from being pronounced dead.

My heart was failing, my blood pressure was dropping. My wife was with me, holding my hand as I slipped away. As the moments unfolded... she asked how I was, I told her I felt like I was dying. I asked her to help me move to a window so I could look at the trees in the woods beyond where I lay. She helped me and I lay gazing out as I began to slip away.

She continued to hold my hand... maybe talk to me... I don’t know, I was absorbed in what I was feeling.

And I began to settle in, to recognize and accept what was happening. I did not fight death, I just let the energies flow.

I remember thinking it was strange because there was no fear, there was instead wonder at what was unfolding. This world and the memories and attachments/chains that held me, fell away. I wanted to go deeper, felt drawn to whatever lay ahead.

As I write this, a word comes... comfort. I remember how comfortable it felt to be dying. It felt familiar. It felt a bit like coming home after a long, hard journey, walking in your front door and finally being able to lie down in your warm, cozy bed to rest.

I also began to notice, the further in I went, the less of me there seemed to be. "I", or what I thought of as "me", began to fall away. This was replaced by an awareness... a recognition. I began to feel the trees outside that window... I felt the earth that nourished them... I felt the birds flying overhead... I felt the clouds rushing past. I began to feel more and more of such things. There was a rush... no a flood of awareness of "life" outside my body. I was feeling connected to more and more... and more.

As I think of it now, it was a gentle rush, with no sense of being overwhelmed. It felt more like something I had simply forgotten and the memories were just now returning. As I continued to settle in, I was floating in awareness of everything. I began to feel connected to every single entity in the universe... every animate and inanimate aspect.

And connection is far too weak a word to describe the experience. I did not feel connected to everything...

I "WAS" EVERY THING IN EXISTENCE.

And the further I settled in... the less of me there was to be concerned with. I found myself in the place where I had one foot in this world and the other foot in what comes next.

I became aware I had a choice to make. From my perspective, not all people get to choose. Sometimes the decision is made by someone or something else... like a car accident... or a gunshot... or a disease... you get the idea). That day, I was able make a choice. I could return to the world as I had known it or I could go on to what comes next.

I began to think... I tried to think of what I knew so far of the new... to me... place and I tried to think of everything I was leaving behind. Time meant nothing where I found myself, so I was able to think of many things. I thought of everything I'd done in life, thought of everything I'd left undone. Thought of things done right... and things done wrong. Dreams, hopes, pleasures, desires... I scraped up every reason I could imagine.

And I began to realize I couldn’t think of anything back in the old world better than what I was feeling... nothing... And I thought hard.

That is to say... nothing came to mind until I heard the voice of the person holding my hand and calling my name. And I thought of the girl who took my hand in marriage. The girl who was still holding my hand 34 years later. And I thought of the daughter I loved. That I had not been able to say goodbye to. And I thought... what is left to do relative to them.

And if this thought had not come to me; I would have let go.

As I lay there, I realized I had not done enough for either of those sweet ladies to try and show them how much I loved them. So I decided to come back... And I felt a touch in my hand and a sweet voice in my ear calling my name. And I began to drift away... from the new place. I felt myself losing that and coming back here.

Funny thing... leaving that new place hurt. It felt like I had been searching forever and had finally found my way back home. And I had to leave it. I was in shock for a while... still working in management... still seeing the same people... friends and family etc. But I wasn’t happy. I mean I was happy sometimes like when I cooked a meal for my girls and they loved it... or when I walked into deep woods with my dog Gypsy, stuff like that made me happy but not much else

See in that place where I was... all of this world was stripped bare. I saw life here as I never had before. I saw lies here I’d heard all my life and accepted as truth... were lies. I returned with a much more profound understanding what was real and what was false.

The madness of the world in 2021, especially here in the US where I live... well the mind of mankind as I see expressed on TV... is offensive to my sensibilities. I do not like the state of things. There is very little I can do to change any part of it. I am ready to leave it behind.

But... I still have hands to hold, loved ones to hug, dogs to walk and guitars to play...so I’m not ready to leave just yet... maybe soon though... I am sorta feeling that. 

To sum it up here are three important lessons I learned.

When you die.

1) Ego... You do not carry forward what the energy of your mind created to explain/comprehend your perspective/awareness of life. Ego is a dream. You cast off your dream of this world... your life... your memories...when you die. The last thing you lose before you "see the face of God" is your ego. (God has no ego either.)

2) Yes, Leo is right. You are God. Everything is God. Death to life here, at least in the beginning of it... brought acute awareness of that fact. And it is beyond my comprehension at this point. I just know it was/is real.

3) Love... the most powerful force in existence. It is what brought me back from the brink of death. Leo is also right about God being Love.

Peace and Love... and Truth to you.

[Vibroverse]

There is no death and everything is consciousness. So when you die you actually don't leave your loved ones because there is no such thing as death. You become one with them in your consciousness which is the only thing there is in existence ever. Everything including your body is imagination within and as you, and your loved ones are also that forever. So you don't need to die to experience that oneness because who you really are is already dead forever. Who you really are is the zero point. 

[Moksha]

2 hours ago, Chance Cunningham said:

I also began to notice, the further in I went, the less of me there seemed to be. "I", or what I thought of as "me", began to fall away. This was replaced by an awareness... a recognition. I began to feel the trees outside that window... I felt the earth that nourished them... I felt the birds flying overhead... I felt the clouds rushing past. I began to feel more and more of such things. There was a rush... no a flood of awareness of "life" outside my body. I was feeling connected to more and more... and more.

As I think of it now, it was a gentle rush, with no sense of being overwhelmed. It felt more like something I had simply forgotten and the memories were just now returning. As I continued to settle in, I was floating in awareness of everything. I began to feel connected to every single entity in the universe... every animate and inanimate aspect.

And connection is far too weak a word to describe the experience. I did not feel connected to everything...

I "WAS" EVERY THING IN EXISTENCE.

Thank you for sharing such a personal a profound experience, and welcome to the forum! I love what you describe here, and was trying to speak to it in this thread. When your spiritual eyes open, you recognize the coherence of Consciousness, and see the sameness in everything. We are all the same God, manifested through different forms and in different states, but ultimately there is only God.

[EternalDream]

Really an amazing and beautiful story, I thank you for sharing it. I also think that love is one of the most powerful forces that exist. I have a question for you:

From your point of view, what are the 3 strongest reasons why one doesn't need to be afraid of dying and especially of leaving the relatives behind?

[Chance Cunningham]

 No need for this post. 

Edited February 22, 2021 by Chance Cunningham
Cold feet

[Moksha]

@Chance Cunningham Whether we are a soul on a journey through many lives, or we only get one shot in this life, is hard to say. Many of the near death experiences I've read about, as well as ancient wisdom, point to some form of bundled continuity across multiple lives, with lessons to be learned along the way, but regardless, as you have realized, every soul journey must eventually end. It is the inevitable fate of every form.

Realizing the transience of form is the beginning of wisdom. The Buddha chose to leave his life of luxury, and even his wife and son, with the determination to learn the lesson of transience. Like you, I am getting older, and I no longer cling to the illusion, or even the desire, for immortality. As I see it, the secret of life is love. Dream lucidly, realizing yourself as God within the nowhere, and celebrate every step of the journey.

[Chance Cunningham]

50 minutes ago, Moksha said:

"As I see it, the secret of life is love. Dream lucidly, realizing yourself as God within the nowhere, and celebrate every step of the journey."                                                                                                                                                                          (I'm not sure how to do the quote thing here... but, yes, I agree with you. Thank you. Peace and Love... and Truth will set you free

50 minutes ago, Moksha said:

@Chance Cunningham Whether we are a soul on a journey through many lives, or we only get one shot in this life, is hard to say. Many of the near death experiences I've read about, as well as ancient wisdom, point to some form of bundled continuity across multiple lives, with lessons to be learned along the way, but regardless, as you have realized, every soul journey must eventually end. It is the inevitable fate of every form.

Realizing the transience of form is the beginning of wisdom. The Buddha chose to leave his life of luxury, and even his wife and son, with the determination to learn the lesson of transience. Like you, I am getting older, and I no longer cling to the illusion, or even the desire, for immortality. As I see it, the secret of life is love. Dream lucidly, realizing yourself as God within the nowhere, and celebrate every step of the journey.

On 2/18/2021 at 11:31 AM, EternalDream said:

Really an amazing and beautiful story, I thank you for sharing it. I also think that love is one of the most powerful forces that exist. I have a question for you:

From your point of view, what are the 3 strongest reasons why one doesn't need to be afraid of dying and especially of leaving the relatives behind?

 

Edited February 20, 2021 by Chance Cunningham
Learning how to quote other's post here

[flowboy]

@Chance Cunningham  Thank you for sharing this. I enjoyed it and found it quite profound.

I teared up a little when I read what you said about how people you love make it worth living. And being able to kiss the woman you love. And walking in nature, and petting your dog. That those would be the parts of life that are worth coming back to this imperfect dream for. I really felt that.

You mentioned being back in a life where not everything you do makes you happy. Did you feel like making changes after this happened?

Another question: would you be willing to try 5-meo-DMT and see if it takes you back to a similar place? It would be quite valuable to know how the two compare. Would the psychedelic induced state feel fake to you now that you've been to the actual place it imitates? Or do they lead to the same place? I think many people on here would be dying to know. No pun intended.

Edited February 20, 2021 by flowboy

[Chance Cunningham]

On 2/20/2021 at 1:33 PM, flowboy said:

  No need for this post.

 

Quote

 

 

Quote

Another question: would you be willing to try 5-meo-DMT and see if it takes you back to a similar place? It would be quite valuable to know how the two compare. Would the psychedelic induced state feel fake to you now that you've been to the actual place it imitates? Or do they lead to the same place? I think many people on here would be dying to know. No pun intended.

 

Edited February 22, 2021 by Chance Cunningham
cold feet

[Guest Bazooka Jesus]

Amazing, thanks for sharing this?

17 hours ago, Chance Cunningham said:

And yet... my ego is why I am here posting now... which seems a selfish act on my part. Not seems... is... the height of arrogance on my part.

Relax, there is absolutely no reason to beat yourself up about it. "You" telling "us" about your experience is just God talking to itself... because why the heck not? Just think of it as divine entertainment! Becoming immersed in the Ego illusion is God's way of spicing things up and playing with itself (the same way that a little child is keeping itself entertained by imagining invisible friends while playing in the sand box), so enjoy it while it lasts, my friend. 

[Bojan V]

@Chance Cunningham Thank you for sharing your experience with us! It touched me deeply somewhere in my soul...

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