Bad boy or Good boy

[Emerald]

1 hour ago, Etherial Cat said:

Oh.

That's a very interesting framework!

It makes sense that a man's relationship towards women depends on how at ease he is with his inner Feminine. And that it develops as per a constant pattern a bit like SD.

Each phases then project its relationship with its anima outwardly, right? And they've got then an absolute need to make reality conform to their inner box?

It kinda explains the witch hunting that I can feel. A "deviant" female is a threat to an inner worldview as much as it is in the external.

I'm wondering, do you think that Anima suppression often correlates with a desire for more masculinity? Sometimes, I'm thinking that some men want us to be into the hyper masculine brute type because it represents their own unconscious ideal.

Btw, I think just like on SD, people can be quite in between. For instance, if you take the Gaston himself, not only is he a brute, but he's also a brute that comes off with a plan at several points in the movie.

I particularly like this one. I can't stop laughing at how this scene parallels well with a modern arrogant, pick up artist convinced he's an irresistible catch, who "knows" female. The way Belle reacts and dodges his offer just kills me... ? 

Yes exactly. The Anima is projected onto women as a whole group... and any reality that exists outside of that is invalidated.

A lot of the common male worldview around female sexuality is based around confirmation bias and cherry picking... lots of logical fallacies are employed to maintain that worldview. And the cherry on top of the worldview is "Never listen to women about their own sexuality. They don't know what they want." So, they can never actually learn a more accurate account of what female sexuality is because their cup is already full with useful falsehoods. 

So, when we say that they are incorrect about the inner workings of female sexuality, they can't see past their own projected Anima image. And they also have a worldview that has basically halted their Anima integration in its tracks... leaving them unknowingly less attractive to women, even though they're able to have more sex.

Basically, falsely believing there is a direct correlation between the number of women who have sex with them and their objective attractiveness. Usually girls/women develop this mindset when they're inexperienced. They think that men being attracted to them and wanting to sleep with them is a reflection of how attractive and valuable they are as opposed to simply being a reflection of how those men are.

And usually women learn that those things don't coincide with one another quite young... though not always. But men often don't get the chance to learn that because women don't usually approach. So, men can still entertain the notion that a woman sleeping with them is some indicator of their inherent attractiveness.

And of course, that would be a very difficult mentality to dispossess oneself of, if a lot of the ego is tied up in women's sexual responses to them. 

And yes, Anima repression is often caused by a desire to rid one's self of femininity and to hyper-identify with masculinity. And this causes an intense aversion/attraction response to women... which is why men who struggle with the Anima are both misogynistic and utterly obsessed with women sexually. They project a powerful woman up on a pedestal holding the supreme power to judge male worth or lack-there-of. So, they try to find ways to diminish women's power because it makes them feel insecure.

So, a lot of these beliefs about female sexuality are an expression of male insecurities and fears relative to women and their own feminine side. And they look through this lens at female sexuality to make themselves feel more attractive and in control by being able to be this way or do that thing. But the reality is that men in phase 1 and 2 feel powerless in relation to women, because of their Anima projection.

And it simultaneously soothes and agitates them to hold tight to their narratives. The Anima is powerful and cruel, yes. But if you're accepted by her by proxy of specific women agreeing to sleep with her, then that projected meaning is very soothing and feels like a win.

[Loving Radiance]

32 minutes ago, Emerald said:

I tend to notice a visceral aversion in my body towards arrogant men... like my body is armoring itself. And it makes sense because these types of guys don't make very good fathers

Would you say that arrogance is exclusive to assholes?

22 minutes ago, Emerald said:

But the reality is that men in phase 1 and 2 feel powerless in relation to women, because of their Anima projection.

By that you mean those men who are attracted to Eve & Helen?

23 minutes ago, Emerald said:

And it simultaneously soothes and agitates them to hold tight to their narratives. The Anima is powerful and cruel, yes. But if you're accepted by her by proxy of specific women agreeing to sleep with her, then that projected meaning is very soothing and feels like a win.

Do you mean to be accepted by repressed Anima?

How could specific women sleep with the Anima?

[SamC]

39 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Yes exactly. The Anima is projected onto women as a whole group... and any reality that exists outside of that is invalidated.

A lot of the common male worldview around female sexuality is based around confirmation bias and cherry picking... lots of logical fallacies are employed to maintain that worldview. And the cherry on top of the worldview is "Never listen to women about their own sexuality. They don't know what they want." So, they can never actually learn a more accurate account of what female sexuality is because their cup is already full with useful falsehoods. 

@EmeraldLol, we say that because we have taken advice from women and than got rejected and friendzoned as a result of that advice.

In fact, what we many times have discovered is that girls often wants the exact opposite of what they say they want.

Quote

So, when we say that they are incorrect about the inner workings of female sexuality, they can't see past their own projected Anima image. And they also have a worldview that has basically halted their Anima integration in its tracks... leaving them unknowingly less attractive to women, even though they're able to have more sex.

What the heck is anima? Would love to learn more.

Quote

Basically, falsely believing there is a direct correlation between the number of women who have sex with them and their objective attractiveness. Usually girls/women develop this mindset when they're inexperienced. They think that men being attracted to them and wanting to sleep with them is a reflection of how attractive and valuable they are as opposed to simply being a reflection of how those men are.

Well... there is a correlation.

Quote

And usually women learn that those things don't coincide with one another quite young... though not always. But men often don't get the chance to learn that because women don't usually approach. So, men can still entertain the notion that a woman sleeping with them is some indicator of their inherent attractiveness.

If a girl that wants to sleep with you is not a strong indicator that you're attractive ( attest to that girl) , than I don't know what the fuck is.

If it's not an indicator, it should be. Otherwise what the fuck is the girl doing.

Quote

So, a lot of these beliefs about female sexuality are an expression of male insecurities and fears relative to women and their own feminine side. And they look through this lens at female sexuality to make themselves feel more attractive and in control by being able to be this way or do that thing. But the reality is that men in phase 1 and 2 feel powerless in relation to women, because of their Anima projection.

It's not that simply but there is some truth here. Most men who have a problem with woman struggle becuase they haven't integrated their masculinity.

I mean, masculinity is what attracts woman.. the Lion, underneath it all.

Quote

And it simultaneously soothes and agitates them to hold tight to their narratives. The Anima is powerful and cruel, yes. But if you're accepted by her by proxy of specific women agreeing to sleep with her, then that projected meaning is very soothing and feels like a win.

Getting laid sure is a win. I get what you mean though. There is a sense of, I am worthy now thing that's going on

Edited February 18, 2021 by SamC

[ilja]

what is anima ?

[Loving Radiance]

@ilja

 

Edited February 18, 2021 by Loving Radiance

[Emerald]

49 minutes ago, Loving Radiance said:

 

Would you say that arrogance is exclusive to assholes?

I would say that arrogant men are always "assholes", but that assholes are not always arrogant. It can come through in other ways. 

By that you mean those men who are attracted to Eve & Helen?

Yes, men will attract and be attracted to women who embody the Eve of the Genesis story and Helen of Troy Archetypes when they are in those phases. Also, they will tend to see all women as being an embodiment of those Archetypes, including women who have moved past them.

Do you mean to be accepted by repressed Anima?

How could specific women sleep with the Anima?

What I mean by this that men reject their Anima, which is their inner woman... their feminine side.

And in that rejection/repression, the Anima has a lot of power over men and a lot of allure when it is projected onto women. 

So, when men become obsessed with women and women's judgment, it is often because of them projecting their Anima onto those women. And there is a desire to push the Anima away... but also to integrate with the Anima.

So, if they project their Anima onto women... and they can get those women to approve of them and sleep with them, it can feel like Anima Integration played out externally.

They're playing out an internal Archetypal story.

[SamC]

6 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Would you say that arrogance is exclusive to assholes?

I would say that arrogant men are always "assholes", but that assholes are not always arrogant. It can come through in other ways. 

By that you mean those men who are attracted to Eve & Helen?

Yes, men will attract and be attracted to women who embody the Eve of the Genesis story and Helen of Troy Archetypes when they are in those phases. Also, they will tend to see all women as being an embodiment of those Archetypes, including women who have moved past them.

Do you mean to be accepted by repressed Anima?

How could specific women sleep with the Anima?

What I mean by this that men reject their Anima, which is their inner woman... their feminine side.

And in that rejection/repression, the Anima has a lot of power over men and a lot of allure when it is projected onto women. 

So, when men become obsessed with women and women's judgment, it is often because of them projecting their Anima onto those women. And there is a desire to push the Anima away... but also to integrate with the Anima.

So, if they project their Anima onto women... and they can get those women to approve of them and sleep with them, it can feel like Anima Integration played out externally.

They're playing out an internal Archetypal story.

Aha, so there is like a self hate going on by the anima that then is projected outwards to woman? Is that what you mean? I buy that

[ilja]

@Loving Radiance gay

[Emerald]

57 minutes ago, SamC said:

@Emerald

In fact, what we many times have discovered is that girls often wants the exact opposite of what they say they want.

What the heck is anima? Would love to learn more.

Well... there is a correlation.

If a girl that wants to sleep with you is not a strong indicator that you're attractive ( attest to that girl) , than I don't know what the fuck is.

If it's not an indicator, it should be. Otherwise what the fuck is the girl doing.

It's not that simply but there is some truth here. Most men who have a problem with woman struggle becuase they haven't integrated their masculinity.

I mean, masculinity is what attracts woman.. the Lion, underneath it all.

Getting laid sure is a win. I get what you mean though. There is a sense of, I am worthy now thing that's going on

Lol, we say that because we have taken advice from women and than got rejected and friendzoned as a result of that advice.

I'm not giving you advice. I'm telling you how female sexuality works. The truths I tell you are not tools that can be wielded easily.

If your goal is just to get laid and that's it, what I'm sharing is not a user friendly tool for that. I'm sharing with you a reflection of the subjective reality of women's attraction to men.

Also, there is no such thing as a friendzone. This is something that men put on top of their experience of female sexuality to understand it through the lens of their own sexuality, which is one of broad categorization. But women don't actually have the subjective experience of a friendzone because there's no categorization. 

What the heck is anima? Would love to learn more.

Loving Radience posted a couple of my videos on the topic above. 

But basically, the Anima is the inner woman in every man. This is the man's feminine side, which is necessary to integrate if there is a desire to connect with women at a deeper level and to develop one's self. 

The Animus is the same but opposite for a woman.

If a girl that wants to sleep with you is not a strong indicator that you're attractive ( attest to that girl) , than I don't know what the fuck is.

If it's not an indicator, it should be. Otherwise what the fuck is the girl doing.

The distinction here is that there is a gradation of potency of attractiveness. 

At the very lowest grade of attraction potency, I am attracted to the majority of men... probably 70%. This is mostly based on looks and a few other basic qualities.

And in times in the past where I've had hook ups and one night stands, my attraction level was there... at the lowest potency. 

But from the female perspective, these experiences are typically very boring and unsatisfying. You get none of the juiciness you're actually looking for, because depth is what you're craving.

But the real indicator of attraction, from the female perspective is if the feeling is potent or not. Women are looking for emotional stimulation and depth... which will never come from some hook up experience. 

So, when I say that more women sleeping with you isn't an indicator of male attraction, what I mean is that most all men are capable of hitting that low potency bar for women who are open to casual sexual encounters. And maybe you can get a few notches above low potency by doing some pick up techniques.

But, the real attraction from the female experience is like the best feeling you've ever felt. And it's so un-manipulable and organic. It feels obsessionally good. 

So, what I'm saying is that (by my standards), the level of attractiveness it requires for a woman to sleep with a guy if you're in the mood for that is so far away from the full depth and breadth of female magnetism toward a man. 

It's not that simply but there is some truth here. Most men who have a problem with woman struggle becuase they haven't integrated their masculinity.

I mean, masculinity is what attracts woman.. the Lion, underneath it all.

Lion is both masculine and feminine. The lion is masculine because it is kinglike and in charge. It is feminine because it is connected to its animal nature, emotions, intuition, and instincts. You can't have the lion without integrating both the masculine and feminine sides of he personality.

The lion tamer is also both masculine and feminine. The lion tamer is pro-social and therefore feminine. But it is also masculine because it involves discipline and a taming of nature into a pro-social form.

Basically, you can't integrate one without the other. Feminine and masculine are two sides to the same coin. 

 

[Emerald]

18 minutes ago, SamC said:

Aha, so there is like a self hate going on by the anima that then is projected outwards to woman? Is that what you mean? I buy that

Yes.

The self-hate happens when men repress their Anima.

And then the Anima projects itself onto women. And through this projection the Anima makes the man feel like he has made his Anima feel... rejected and powerless. 

So, it is very often that men are grappling with this inner fight with their feminine side, and that this spills out into some gnarly self-esteem problems and a general sense of fixation, aversion, and powerlessness to women... potentially even leading into deep levels of misogyny and a desire to knock his own Anima off the pedestal by doing the same to women.

Or to "win" the affection of his rejected Anima that he subconsciously misses by getting women to affirm his worth through sexual attention.

[SamC]

8 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Yes.

The self-hate happens when men repress their Anima.

And then the Anima projects itself onto women. And through this projection the Anima makes the man feel like he has made his Anima feel... rejected and powerless. 

So, it is very often that men are grappling with this inner fight with their feminine side, and that this spills out into some gnarly self-esteem problems and a general sense of fixation, aversion, and powerlessness to women... potentially even leading into deep levels of misogyny and a desire to knock his own Anima off the pedestal by doing the same to women.

Or to "win" the affection of his rejected Anima that he subconsciously misses by getting women to affirm his worth through sexual attention.

Got it@Emerald  how does this go hand in hand with the repression of the masculine though? ( lack of boundaries, people pleasing, unassertivnes, enmeshment trauma)

Is it the feminie side that isn't allowed to express itself? I've always struggled with attracting girls but I feel like I'm quite emasulate in some ways and have a lot of the feminie energy. I always thought it was the opposite, but I guess not. What do you, as someone who works with this say? Does integrating that side make really make me more masculine and help me with attracting woman? Isn't it the masculine integration I am missing?

 

 

 

Edited February 18, 2021 by SamC

[StateOfMind]

There is a 3rd option, it's called "Flow".

[Loving Radiance]

@Emerald ?

[Emerald]

1 hour ago, SamC said:

Got it@Emerald  how does this go hand in hand with the repression of the masculine though? ( lack of boundaries, people pleasing, unassertivnes, enmeshment trauma)

Is it the feminie side that isn't allowed to express itself? I've always struggled with attracting girls but I feel like I'm quite emasulate in some ways and have a lot of the feminie energy. I always thought it was the opposite, but I guess not. What do you, as someone who works with this say? Does integrating that side make really make me more masculine and help me with attracting woman? Isn't it the masculine integration I am missing?

how does this go hand in hand with the repression of the masculine though? ( lack of boundaries, people pleasing, unassertivnes, enmeshment trauma)

Because masculine and feminine are two sides to one coin, you can't repress one without repressing the other. And everything has a feminine and masculine aspect.

Boundaries are masculine in the sense that you have to assert them and draw a line in the sand. But to know what your boundaries are in the first place requires you to be deeply connected to your emotions... which are part of the feminine side of the personality.

So, you can't have strong boundaries without integrating the feminine side because the feminine side gives you an intuitive sense for what your boundaries are. Your emotions are your compass in that way.

Likewise, you can't have strong boundaries if your masculine side is repressed because you won't be able to assert those boundaries in the external.

This also extrapolates out into people pleasing, unassertiveness, and enmeshment. 

Is it the feminie side that isn't allowed to express itself? I've always struggled with attracting girls but I feel like I'm quite emasulate in some ways and have a lot of the feminie energy. I always thought it was the opposite, but I guess not. What do you, as someone who works with this say? Does integrating that side make really make me more masculine and help me with attracting woman? Isn't it the masculine integration I am missing?

The thing to recognize about polarity is that we all have a feminine and masculine side. And to be a highly developed person, we have to integrate both sides. And these are the polarities of Yin and Yang. So, they aren't gender exclusive... they're in everything. 

And we have an inborn masculine/feminine signature. This means that we can't be any more or less masculine than we already are... nor can we be any more or less feminine than we already are. To believe that we can change these things about ourselves is akin to believing you can convert someone from being gay to being straight.

For example, for me, I would categorize myself as about 75% feminine and 25% masculine... which is just about average for a woman. But if I tried to add femininity to myself or take away my masculinity, all I'd be doing is repressing, leaving me in the same exact ratio of masculine to feminine... while also squelching my authenticity. Let's say I'd be trying to get to 100% feminine... but since that's not possible, all I'd be doing is cutting away at my personality and strength while still maintaining my usual 75/25 split.

So, the best thing to do is to integrate and own whatever is there regardless of which category it falls into. This will enable you to express your masculinity in its most exalted form... along with your femininity. 

Now, a lot of times, men in particular, fear being seen as feminine because of cultural attitudes and assumptions about masculinity. So, there comes to be a repression of the feminine... often times based in an insecurity about their masculinity as well as many misconceptions and over-simplifications about how polarity works. 

What this does is shift a man out of his natural alignment, where he can derive all his authenticity and strength. When the masculine and feminine sides of the personality are at odds or are repressed, there comes to be a stagnation. No life can happen within you without the integration of the masculine and feminine.

So, understand that the feminine side of the personality is a bit like the soil from which the masculine side of the personality grows. If there is no soil, there is not growth.

 

[Axiomatic]

 

[ilja]

@Axiomatic  lol is that confirmed in your world?

[Gesundheit]

@Emerald Yeah, yeah. Intuition, they say. But is it not intuition too that got y'all almost killed?

Look, I have no reason to want you to be one way or another. It makes zero difference to me. I simply want to know what attracts women on the deepest levels. And up until this point, all evidence points to the same conclusion, which is strength. Not a single thing says otherwise except your logical explanations, which proved to fail all the tests when the rubber hit the road. I'm just conversing with you here in order to have the most comprehensive perspective/understanding possible. Otherwise, I would simply take what everyone else has said combined with my experience and go on with my life.

Strength is the most attractive quality in a man. This is an established fact, and everyone agrees, including yourself. Now, how this strength is manifested and used is different from one man to another, but again, the raw strength is the attractive thing.

It's misleading to say that arrogant men are unattractive, because they possess that strength, at least to some degree. For example, if a man is arrogant with everyone except you, you will find that attractive, regardless. So is that man actually arrogant or not? No. To you, he's just a strong, responsible, reliable, loving, and independent man. He's just masculine and good father material. This one, you will perceive as a lion tamer, even though he's perceived as a jerk/lion by other people. And it makes perfect sense, because if he's a jerk/lion, that means he's not gonna seek company outside of yours, which makes him a really good father. Protective and loyal.

It's selfishness 101. Not demonizing you or any other woman, though. It's just the nature of humans and all living beings.

Now, if he's arrogant with you, you won't probably be attracted to him, unless you have some daddy issues, and I can generally see that in women and agree that it's true. Otherwise, if you're just low consciousness (with no daddy issues), you will probably have conflicting emotions towards him.

Edited February 19, 2021 by Gesundheit

[Emerald]

1 minute ago, Gesundheit said:

@Emerald Yeah, yeah. Intuition, they say. But is it not intuition too that got y'all almost killed?

Look, I have no reason to want you to be one way or another. It makes zero difference to me. I simply want to know what attracts women on the deepest levels. And up until this point, all evidence points to the same conclusion, which is strength. Not a single thing says otherwise except your logical explanations, which proved to fail all the tests when the rubber hits the road. I'm just conversing with you here in order to have the most comprehensive understanding possible. Otherwise, I would just take what everyone else has said combined with my experience and go on with my life.

Strength is the most attractive quality in a man. This is the established fact, and everyone agrees, including yourself. Now, how this strength is manifested and used is different from one man to another, but again, the raw strength is the attractive thing. It's misleading to say that arrogant men are unattractive to you, because they possess that strength at least to some degree. For example, if a man is arrogant with everyone except you, you will find that attractive, regardless. So is that man actually arrogant or not? No. To you, he's just a strong, responsible, reliable, loving, and independent man. He's just masculine and good father material. This one, you will perceive as a lion tamer, even though he's perceived as a jerk by other people. And it makes perfect sense, because if he's a jerk, that means he's not gonna seek company other than yours, which makes him a really good father. Protective and loyal. It's selfishness 101. Not demonizing you or any other woman, though. It's just the nature of humans and all living beings.

Now, if he's arrogant with you, you won't probably be attracted to him, unless you have some daddy issues, and I can see that and agree that it's true. Otherwise, if you're just low consciousness (with no daddy issues), you will probably have conflicting emotions towards him.

Actually, the thing that lead me into a relationship to my first boyfriend is that he mirrored a Shadow Aspect in myself.

He experienced a ton of trauma in his life, and I went into this whole savior narrative that I can make things better for him and sacrifice myself for him. And I decided that I was super devoted. And I projected onto him my own traumatized aspects, and I felt like in trying to save him I could save that part of myself.

So, if I had actually followed my intuition, it would have been a three month long relationship... which would have been fine. It didn't get really bad until much later.

But within a few weeks, I decided that I wanted to marry him and have his children one day. And I dug my heals into that narrative and ignored any bits of intuition that tried to spring through. And I just decided that I was super devoted to helping him overcome his hardships. It was like I was trying to be his mom, and he was like a child sometimes.

He oscillated back and forth between the badass facade to normal to helpless traumatized child to violent psycho. 

I lived with him in my last two years of high school. And then, I went to college and he really went off the rails. Then he came to live with me in my college town during my junior year, and that's where everything hit rock bottom. And my ironclad commitment finally broke and I just had to walk away.

But I assure you that arrogant man are unattractive to me... specifically because arrogance is so often a cover for weakness and insecurity. I can't even think of an arrogant guy that appears strong to me.

Yes... strength is attractive. But only if it is mirrored in their strength of character.  

Also, my ex was like 5'7" and not very strong or masculine. He was a bit like a Chihuahua in his desire to look like a big dog. He put on a badass front mostly to cover insecurities. 

But for me, what kept me in it so long is because I felt like he would fall apart without me and that he would kill himself. So, it was his fragility that kept me there. 

[Preety_India]

8 minutes ago, Emerald said:

But for me, what kept me in it so long is because I felt like he would fall apart without me and that he would kill himself. So, it was his fragility that kept me there. 

This is the same reason why I fell in love with my ex. He first told me that he was going to commit suicide and overdose on his pills. 

I tried to comfort him and I thought I was saving him. That's how the relationship began. I didn't care about myself. All I wanted was to save him because I thought he would die without me. He would keep drawing my sympathy by telling me how alone and miserable he felt. 

And then he became abusive, violent and cheat on me several times, break my boundaries, lie and whenever I tried to leave him, he would get despondent and beg me to come back.. 

In the end I simply gave up and could take his mind games no more. And realized what a fool I was to want to save him meanwhile he was destroying my emotional well being all along. 

 

[SamC]

7 hours ago, Emerald said:

how does this go hand in hand with the repression of the masculine though? ( lack of boundaries, people pleasing, unassertivnes, enmeshment trauma)

Because masculine and feminine are two sides to one coin, you can't repress one without repressing the other. And everything has a feminine and masculine aspect.

Boundaries are masculine in the sense that you have to assert them and draw a line in the sand. But to know what your boundaries are in the first place requires you to be deeply connected to your emotions... which are part of the feminine side of the personality.

So, you can't have strong boundaries without integrating the feminine side because the feminine side gives you an intuitive sense for what your boundaries are. Your emotions are your compass in that way.

Likewise, you can't have strong boundaries if your masculine side is repressed because you won't be able to assert those boundaries in the external.

This also extrapolates out into people pleasing, unassertiveness, and enmeshment. 

Is it the feminie side that isn't allowed to express itself? I've always struggled with attracting girls but I feel like I'm quite emasulate in some ways and have a lot of the feminie energy. I always thought it was the opposite, but I guess not. What do you, as someone who works with this say? Does integrating that side make really make me more masculine and help me with attracting woman? Isn't it the masculine integration I am missing?

The thing to recognize about polarity is that we all have a feminine and masculine side. And to be a highly developed person, we have to integrate both sides. And these are the polarities of Yin and Yang. So, they aren't gender exclusive... they're in everything. 

And we have an inborn masculine/feminine signature. This means that we can't be any more or less masculine than we already are... nor can we be any more or less feminine than we already are. To believe that we can change these things about ourselves is akin to believing you can convert someone from being gay to being straight.

For example, for me, I would categorize myself as about 75% feminine and 25% masculine... which is just about average for a woman. But if I tried to add femininity to myself or take away my masculinity, all I'd be doing is repressing, leaving me in the same exact ratio of masculine to feminine... while also squelching my authenticity. Let's say I'd be trying to get to 100% feminine... but since that's not possible, all I'd be doing is cutting away at my personality and strength while still maintaining my usual 75/25 split.

So, the best thing to do is to integrate and own whatever is there regardless of which category it falls into. This will enable you to express your masculinity in its most exalted form... along with your femininity. 

Now, a lot of times, men in particular, fear being seen as feminine because of cultural attitudes and assumptions about masculinity. So, there comes to be a repression of the feminine... often times based in an insecurity about their masculinity as well as many misconceptions and over-simplifications about how polarity works. 

What this does is shift a man out of his natural alignment, where he can derive all his authenticity and strength. When the masculine and feminine sides of the personality are at odds or are repressed, there comes to be a stagnation. No life can happen within you without the integration of the masculine and feminine.

So, understand that the feminine side of the personality is a bit like the soil from which the masculine side of the personality grows. If there is no soil, there is not growth.

 

Have badboys usally integrated their anima?