Why I find this present moment not enough, not 'full' or complete?

[Surfingthewave]

9 hours ago, Batman said:

Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to experience directly how every aspect of your experience is designed for survival of the self.

@Javfly33

I would extend the mission. 

Instead of focusing on survival. Experience the moment right now. In full.

Whatever comes up for you, allow it. 

There's no purpose to it. 

It's like when you're on holiday, you're in a different place, and there's no schedule. 

You see things you wouldn't normally see. 

At some point when you "drop the mind" you discover beauty. 

It could be the sound of silence. The taste of tea. The view out your room. 

If you're struggling to " see" it could be because you're sobering up. You are still seeing it "without drugs". 

You will get to a point where you experience beauty and ultimately Love, for what is. You won't need drugs. 

Stop searching for it and it will appear. 

Go back to your practices, meditation et al and find it there. 

 

Edited February 17, 2021 by Surfingthewave

[Javfly33]

8 hours ago, This said:

Such a random answer

Oh, is not random. I know what he's talking about ?

[James123]

12 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

But if not, if I would find myself unable to bear the boringness and emptyness of being in the present moment .

The so called mind which says that “present moment is boring and empty or this feeling is very boring and empty vs vs....” is your enemy. Do not listen whatever comes from so called mind. 

Your greatest enemy is yourself. 

Imam Ali

Edited February 17, 2021 by James123

[Haumea2018]

13 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

Why it's so difficult to be great with just being at the present moment?

Because of trauma.  Being present brings up pain/negative emotions, and there's a desire to distract oneself from them.

But you have to stay with the "emptiness and boredom" so you RELEASE IT.

[Javfly33]

1 hour ago, James123 said:

The so called mind which says that “present moment is boring and empty or this feeling is very boring and empty vs vs....” is your enemy. Do not listen whatever comes from so called mind. 

Your greatest enemy is yourself. 

Imam Ali

@James123 Definitely. I want to break free of that prison.

At the same time I know I am the one which is creating the prison at every moment.

So maybe the question would be... How do I stop creating my own prison?

I think ultimately I keep creating it because I think I am real.

That's why I am pursuing full awakening brother.

See being conscious of thoughts it's clear that I am not the thoughts. This brings a space of awareness. I might be that it seems.

Yet it doesn't feel total. So I end up feeling like I am real again.

Because ultimately I am not sure about any of this. If not I would have died already (the concept of me)

[nistake]

9 minutes ago, Javfly33 said:

See being conscious of thoughts it's clear that I am not the thoughts. This brings a space of awareness. I might be that it seems.

Stay with this for a while. You're on good track.

[Javfly33]

35 minutes ago, nistake said:

Stay with this for a while. You're on good track.

I've tried but I can't maintain the state.

In a sense it doesn't depend on me but of consciousness itself ??

[nistake]

@Javfly33 That's when stable mindfulness skills come handy. I find it quite strange that mindfulness tends to be really underemphasized.

Let's say you sit down to meditate and after a while you recognize of this 'space behind your thoughts and feelings'. You mind instantly jumps in and says: "Oh, is that it? Is this the present moment? Is this consciousness?". Then, if mindfulness kicks in, you recognize that you are actually in a narrative about the present moment. Therefore, you have the chance 'to go back to that space' without the unnecessary commentary. If you keep at it, you're bound to intuitively recognize what that 'space' really is.

[Leo Gura]

15 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

But if not, if I would find myself unable to bear the boringness and emptyness of being in the present moment .

Why it's so difficult to be great with just being at the present moment?

That's how ego is. It can't sit still.

[Rilles]

If you found the present moment completely perfect you would physically die. 

[James123]

2 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

So maybe the question would be... How do I stop creating my own prison?

 

You must let go yourself. Let go every future expectations, day dreams, body, satisfactions, pursuing enlightenment, including these sentences. Let go everything you have know and depend on, firstly belief of “I”. 

2 hours ago, nistake said:

Stay with this for a while. You're on good track.

 

2 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

ve tried but I can't maintain the state.

This is completely false. “You” can not maintain any “state” or “stay” in the “state”. You have to let go “Everything “. Otherwise, enlightenment never comes,  you operate from the mind and be stuck in the thought process, fantasies, suffering  and prison.  

Dont look at the people in form. %99 have no idea what are they talking about. If you put them darkness or silence for 2 weeks they will go crazy. For instance, enlightenment comes to girl who is in Nazi’s camp, and realized that her entire life will be there and will never be able to get out. She completely let go the “life”. Other example, a Samurai cuts his arm of for the Truth. Enlightenment is not a joke. You have to meditate for hours, live in darkness and silence till it vanishes “you”. When enlightenment comes “you” “die” Including anything “you know of dies too, including death”. And whatever left is what really YOU ARE. 

[Beginner Mind]

@Javfly33 Perhaps you haven't fully welcomed the present moment yet. 

Eckhart Tolle: "The decision to make the present moment into your friend is the end of ego."  And, I would add, is the doorway to deep peace.

[Breakingthewall]

42 minutes ago, James123 said:

You must let go yourself. Let go every future expectations, day dreams, body, satisfactions, pursuing enlightenment, including these sentences. Let go everything you have know and depend on, firstly belief of “I”. 

 

This is completely false. “You” can not maintain any “state” or “stay” in the “state”. You have to let go “Everything “. Otherwise, enlightenment never comes,  you operate from the mind and be stuck in the thought process, fantasies, suffering  and prison.  

Dont look at the people in form. %99 have no idea what are they talking about. If you put them darkness or silence for 2 weeks they will go crazy. For instance, enlightenment comes to girl who is in Nazi’s camp, and realized that her entire life will be there and will never be able to get out. She completely let go the “life”. Other example, a Samurai cuts his arm of for the Truth. Enlightenment is not a joke. You have to meditate for hours, live in darkness and silence till it vanishes “you”. When enlightenment comes “you” “die” Including anything “you know of dies too, including death”. And whatever left is what really YOU ARE. 

Great, true. Dissolve the ego is not a joke, but don't do is a hell

 

 

13 hours ago, m0hsen said:

 

 

[Gesundheit]

Ego, obviously.

Keep meditating and questioning the ego.

[James123]

5 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

Great, true. Dissolve the ego is not a joke, but don't do is a hell

Definitely. 

[SoonHei]

On 2/16/2021 at 1:19 PM, Javfly33 said:

I just realize that when I'm not on drugs, I am almost never fine with being in the present moment .

Lately I've been sobering up, in everything, including even coffee 

I find myself having thoughts of future, like "ok, what I am doing now (going to the groceries) make sense because that way I am going to eat today enough so in the future I'll get more muscle and that will get me more confident which eventually will lead to other things which eventually would make me more happy".

So in a sense, the process of going to the groceries was bearable because it had a purpose.

But if not, if I would find myself unable to bear the boringness and emptyness of being in the present moment .

Why it's so difficult to be great with just being at the present moment?

 

because the fish that has jumped out of the water cannot be at ease when it's out of the water.

do not jump out of the water, then you will be at ease... you are wanting to be at ease whilst out of the water. this cannot happen.

this "I" is the fish out of the water - but thankfully, this "I" is not you. It cannot ever be in the present moment, because the present moment is infinite. there are no pieces in it, it is whole. the fragment cannot be whole. don't let the fish jump out of water and you will be the present moment itself. and when the fish does jump out of the water, and it jumps from presences, then it's not the fish that's jumping out, the present moment is jumping out into itself. whole to whole will be whole

the slice cannot do anything to become the whole pizza. it will, by definition, always be a slice.

[Breakingthewall]

if you strip the present moment of all the shit in your mind every second is a gift. the reality is absolutely beautiful, living on the edge, in the unknown, is inspiring, and in the end awaits the most beautiful of all: death. until It arrive there is a job to do: polishing yourself to shine, make your mind clean as a mirror, as deep as it's possible

Edited February 17, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[Javfly33]

10 hours ago, Kalo said:

Yeah, I agree bro. The present moment is boring as fuck without psychedelics. I did 50g 2 days ago and shit got interesting, but now I’m back to baseline.

Idk, I will just keep taking truffles and when I’m not taking it, I’ll just smoke cigarattes and shit like that.

 

Fuck yeah, engage in it until you get so tired "you" dissappear.

 

9 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

if you strip the present moment of all the shit in your mind every second is a gift. the reality is absolutely beautiful, living on the edge, in the unknown, is inspiring, and in the end awaits the most beautiful of all: death. until It arrive there is a job to do: polishing yourself to shine, make your mind clean as a mirror, as deep as it's possible

I can't strip all of my shit because ultimately I believe myself to be a separate self so I have a survival agenda, a story of self development to grow , goals, etc...

That's why I keep saying I want to awake totally. If not I still believe myself to be a separate self.

If I believe myself to be that the most obvious thing to do is to survive. And the mind helps me with that.

[Vibroverse]

You probably confuse the present moment with present manifestation. Present moment is what the manifestation is made of. Present moment is awareness. 

[PureRogueQ]

On 16/02/2021 at 6:29 PM, allislove said:

Due to identification with thinking. 

Imagine, there a big beautiful ocean, but you choose to look only at one little drop, kinda meh. Let go of the apparent drop, you are the ocean. ?

Not really, you can think and feel great and you can be not thinking and feel shit.