The Amazing Power of Feeling

[Mjolnir]

Hello @EmptyVase,

@Nahm, I hope you appreciate I tagged you as well, as I value the responses you have given me in the past. In hopes of guiding me in the right direction.

Thanks a lot for this post, it was as though it spoke to me. I found this in my quest looking to "feel again". When I say that I mean the feelings that feel good, as well as the ability to be vulnerable and accept/share/talk about those feelings that don't feel good. I'm close to finishing my course in NLP Practitioner and it helped me make improvements in my abilities and willingness to do the latter. I also created a way better cognitive understanding of my behavior but I've yet to feel those feelings that feel good, any at all. I notice that I try to create moments of feeling those feelings that feel good by for example eating or entertainment like youtube/gaming/music yet they are short, if there at all, and shallow (not fulfilling or truly satisfying).

Throughout the last few months I used introspection and the course days to try to learn if or what is holding my back from reaching that ability of freely feeling. I learned that I live in my head and I'm vigilant of my surroundings. Positioning myself in such a way that I can't be hurt by others. Sheltering my inner world from the outside world as much as possible.
I'm not sure if this is the predominant factor or the idea that it's not save or the right moment to "feel" yet. I notice that I try to learn and understand this all cognitively but my ideas shift around even as I'm writing this. I'm currently not sure if I'm even thinking in the right direction or if there's anything deeper or something else at play.

I was hoping if you could help me point in the right direction. I'm drawing a blank as I'd love the ability to present my inner world in such a way to someone else that they could guide or suggest a way to a change. Like asking for directions on a map or help solving a puzzle. To be honest I have no idea how to get to the point of feeling freely. Experiencing those emotions that feel good, like love, contentment, fulfillment, joy etc. Also, I don't know who to ask or where to look for. Therefor I was hoping if you had any ideas as this post just jumped out to me.

Thank you for this post, I have a lot of tabs open from the links shared here, which I'm checking out straight away.

Cheers!

[roopepa]

@EmptyVase @Nahm

Truth/Love/Consciousness/Nothingness is like an ocean.

Beliefs and thought-attachments are the same water put into cups. They are isolated from the natural currents of the ocean. The borders of the cups is fear. The friction between the natural currents of the ocean and the isolated water is suffering.

Via feeling and consciousness the borders are recognized to have never truly been there. And the water is poured back to the ocean. Now they are part of one infinite whole and it's natural currents.

[Nahm]

@Mjolnir

A session together would be most ideal. I can’t put into words here what happens ‘there’. Shaktipat is actually a very ‘real thing’, and combined with some pretty simple, basic, easy direct experience explorations it’s game / life changing in under two hours. 

How are the basics… sleep, diet, exercise, daily meditation?

How are the excursions… a few days alone in nature, retreats, psyche trips, etc?

What about more ‘direct’ connection activities like reiki or yoga classes, getting a massage, etc? Simple fun things like that can be big feeling game changers very ‘outta nowhere’ like. Also, as examples that might bring ideas to mind... in the state I live there is a psychic that is so powerful she’d flip anyone’s life inside out, I”m talkin a room full of ‘deceased’ relatives... and wholistic dr that can read a bodymind and tell someone ever nuance out of alignment, right down to specific organs, just by looking at their tongue. Sounds like nonsense but it’s not. These people are ‘out there’ and they change slices in minutes. (As a specific example) A friend of mine saw that psychic and let go of a thousand pound weight he didn’t even know he was carrying related his deceased brother, a death which occurred decades ago. 

What avenues or vehicles if any so far do you employ / enjoy in regard to expression? Personal examples; playing with my kids, singing-songwriting, poetry, cornball Youtube videos, writing books, spending time in nature / alone. 

Just added a Ten Ox-Herding Pictures interpretation yesterday. Like most of the website, it’s feeling & purification oriented. If you have a chance to read it, let me know if it helps connect any of the dots and or brings up any specific questions. 

The meditations are also all feeling & presence oriented. There’s quite a few at this point to read through, but they’re all very short, and usually one or two just ‘click’, we might say in regard to one’s history / experiences with love. Could be forgiveness for one, acceptance for another, lovingkindness for another, meditative eating or walking for another, etc. 

And most significantly in regard to feeling, though this might not have clicked quite yet, do you have a dreamboard? When you mentioned being ‘walled off’ in some aspects… connection / connectivity comes to mind. I can think of no better ‘emptying of both barrels’ on the connectivity front than a dreamboard, aligning thought with feeling and seeing what’s on your board actually come into your life, and also taking Leo’s LP course to draw out passion(s) & create purpose. 

The books A Course In Miracles, Ask & It Is Given, and The Alchemist come to mind. 

Also, have you watched my first video? Does it bring anything to mind? Bring up any ‘blockages’, or resistance feeling triggers, like rebuttals, past events, etc? That might help ‘crack some eggs’ / uncover introspection avenues & opportunities so to speak. 

Also this video on self referential thoughts… imo it gets straight to the thinnest, most subtle of veils which stands to release / tap into feeling a lot. It’s hard for me to say or know, but I suspect watching this once or twice each day would lead to a significant ‘a ha’, maybe a series of them. Made it as short & as clear as possible with that in mind. 

Another consideration... spiral dynamics. Recognizing the ‘next’ stage can be triggering in the best possible way, related very much to feeling more than I think people typically notice. As a personal example (and a note on how all these things come together) I once took a mushroom trip / solo retreat in which ‘green’ just exploded in me. Immediately signed up for and did a 300 mile bike ride in three days, raising a few thousand dollars for a girl to go to Disneyland through The Make A Wish Foundation. There is a corridor at the very end of the trek with candles & the pictures of hundreds of kids who have passed on, who had their dream fulfilled through the foundation. I’ve taken 40 of 5meo, and 8 g’s of shrooms - and I’ve never “experienced an awakening” anything even remotely close to that corridor. Fuckin cryin right now just from the memory / notion lol! 

That’s a lot / a comprehensive probe, hopefully not overwhelming. Hopefully sparks an insight or two as to considerations for changes going forward.

? 

 

[Blackhawk]

Feeling isn't always amazing or nice.

[Nahm]

@Blackhawk

Yes you are. 

That’s why the mind’s resistance is felt. 

[Nahm]

@Blackhawk

Well, no. That would not feel good imo. There would be much pain. But ‘going to’ such poor feeling abstractions of the mind like that is not pain, it’s suffering. Had someone mentioned me in a thread about how they’re getting their arms and legs chopped off, my response probably would have been different. There is an ocean of feeling which lies ever so subtly in understanding the distinction between pain vs suffering, actuality / presence vs abstraction, reactivity vs response-ability, lifting yourself vs putting yourself down (all discord vs alignment of the mind w feeling). More simply put, it feels amazing not to talk shit about yourself and focus on abstract nonsense. 

If you are looking to feel, think connection, unity, oneness. This is found everywhere; your interests, focuses, relationships, hopes, dreams, etc. At present, everyone you encounter (here) is met first with your message of “evidence or shut the fuck up”. Good place to start if interested in connectivity. 

[Guest EmptyVase]

@Mjolnir

Hi!

Great introspection you got going on there! Your response very much gives me the vibe that you’re well plugged into feeling. The examples you gave seem, to me, as if you’re noticing some crucial aspects about your behavior, as well as the way you think, and how it makes you feel. That’s honestly like 90% of the job. By doing so, you realize “ugh, that doesn’t feel good, and I wish to feel better” (especially the ‘living in the head’ example).

You’re saying that you have no idea how to get to the point of feeling freely. I’d argue that you already do so very well. It just seems like you don’t quite know what to do with it. So here are a few thoughts on this:

So, you already realized that you seem to have certain perspectives on living, which do not feel good to you. How to change that? It’s actually really simple, but it takes a bit of time to really get traction and some momentum going. At the same time, what I’ll be pointing out is very immediate because feeling good is intrinsically connected to the present moment, now.

Again, how to feel good? First, there is the realization that you carry a perspective that does not feel good to you. The recognition of this allows a few crucial things which are the ‘doorway’ to feel better:

1) Fully feel the full spectrum of whatever sensations arise. Connect to all your senses. Recognize how you're thinking and what you’re thinking about when you don’t feel good. Fully feel, how it feels. Welcome all of it. Don’t see it as a grudge. The very things which do not make you feel good WANT to help you to feel better. So, the more you allow the full spectrum of a particular feeling, the more ‘it’ can help you to actually feel better.

It turns out that the willingness to feel the whole spectrum, both ‘good and bad’, enables you to feel the peaks of both polarities. That means that you not only feel the most uncomfortable things in your present experience fully, you also get to experience the most blissful emotions. With that in mind, the ‘price’ of fully feeling anything uncomfortable is absolutely worth it. Plus, you tend to cleanse and purify body, mind, and spirit with it.

Another perspective on that might be that all the things which don’t feel good to you get recognized as heavy weights, which you are carrying with you. In order to be able to drop them or to let them go, is to actually feel how the weight drags you down. Letting go will make you feel light and free. Literally, the recognition and letting go alone makes you jump and dance. Which leads to the second point.

 

2) Choose thoughts and perspectives which feel better to you. In ‘step one’ you recognized that there actually is weight that you’re carrying with you. By fully feeling it, you get to the point of “Alright, enough of this”, which enables you to let it go. Empty out by recognizing what does not feel good to you through expressing whatever is within. Don’t be a boiling pot near explosion. Open up the lid and find ways to express the steam.

Where there was weight before, there now is ‘empty space’, which is not filled by conditioning anymore. That’s the ‘place’ where the magic happens.

Allow yourself, first and foremost, to feel good. Really allow it in, allow it to inspire you. Trust that the goodness will give you new ideas and perspectives on any situation, which will help you to feel better. You can also trigger it by simply asking: Which thoughts/perspectives would make me feel better? Don’t dwell for an answer, but be open to receive the insight when it's right around the corner.

Do this over and over again, and you will soon find yourself in a whole new momentum. The old momentum of conditioned thoughts will increasingly back away, while new inspiration for life will shape the present moment. And in the end, it's all about that. Connecting back to the present moment.

[Mjolnir]

@Nahm  @EmptyVase

Thank you both for the time to respond, I really appreciate it. There is a lot of information and questions to go through and I'm slightly overwhelmed at the moment as I don't know where to start with responding etc. I'm going through trying to experience and learn about the things you have both shared.
I'd just like to say that I have yet to find any activity/excursion/way of expression that makes me feel a certain way, as it seems rather flat to me. During different activities like playing an instrument, exercise or journaling to name a few, I don't experience any physical feelings. It's just that I'm mentally in different modes. There is no physical response flowing through my body as I'm aware of or can notice.

To put it differently, maybe I can explain it like this. There is a great graph you can find on Google Images when searching for "mapping emotions on the body". Whenever I get a "bad news call" or I'm anxious about something or shock, there is this physical response of the emotions I feel in my body. They are very clear, they jump out so to say. I'm not somewhere else mentally, completely disconnected, I actually notice the feelings and experience them. It seems to be me those emotions we would say are "unwanted" or "unpleasant" (for sake of explanation) come up from some stimuli outside or a thought for example and before I know it I feel physically that which corresponds to that emotion.
However, I feel as though the emotions we would say are "wanted" or "pleasant" are not there. I can't remember the last time I experienced them. There is no physical response I get from an activity or experience that tells me "hey this feels good" or "that's exciting or pleasant". It seems as though its flat or I'm indifferent to it. There is currently no outside stimuli or thought that create this natural response of a good/wanted feeling like those "unwanted" feelings do. (yet ) Mentally I'm still aware of any changes in my body, I don't see why I wouldn't notice those physical sensations in that regard as I'm aware of what I'm feeling as far as I understand.

Is it that those "unwanted" feelings have a lower "threshold" to create a physical response? Like an alarm in a sense, that's more dire and thus becomes apparent quicker and more noticeable than those "wanted" feelings/emotions would have? Like they're very important for our survival and thus jump out more noticeable?

Hopefully you can let me know if I'm even thinking in the right direction. Thanks for your time and the responses so far. Have a great day!
Cheers!

 

[Nahm]

@Mjolnir

Meditation slows down the labeling process which essentially has been hijacking depth of feeling under the mind’s radar. Think of an actor in a movie expressing feeling based on lines, scenes, & other actors’ roles, and then beginning to realize-feel what they’ve been calling their emotions is actually the infinite screen appearing as the movie, scenes, and actors.

 

[Mjolnir]

@Nahm

I'm sorry I don't really follow what you mean. Could you maybe elaborate?

Edited July 21, 2021 by Mjolnir

[Guest EmptyVase]

@Mjolnir

I'm just guessing now, but to me, it seems like your system is wired in a certain way which highlights "negative" emotions while it's simultaneously numbed towards joy and excitement. If that is so, you might want to inspect were this numbness stems from or why it's hard for you to get inspired. It might be something related to repressing emotions and resisting certain states.

Dopamine fasting could help to highlight those things. That would mean to let your body produce the dopamine itself, rather than getting dopamine from external sources like video games, sugar or any other stimuli. Boredom could arise during a dopamine fast, but that's also the space where inspiration sparks. Maybe you should get bored a bit.

[Nahm]

5 hours ago, Mjolnir said:

@Nahm

I'm sorry I don't really follow what you mean. Could you maybe elaborate?

Every elaboration is a contextualization step away. 

Every morning of meditation, is a step home. 

Here is an elaboration, which elaborates on the importance of the practice. 

[TheLoneSage]

On 7/18/2021 at 4:49 AM, Nahm said:

@Mjolnir

A session together would be most ideal. I can’t put into words here what happens ‘there’. Shaktipat is actually a very ‘real thing’, and combined with some pretty simple, basic, easy direct experience explorations it’s game / life changing in under two hours. 

How are the basics… sleep, diet, exercise, daily meditation?

How are the excursions… a few days alone in nature, retreats, psyche trips, etc?

What about more ‘direct’ connection activities like reiki or yoga classes, getting a massage, etc? Simple fun things like that can be big feeling game changers very ‘outta nowhere’ like. Also, as examples that might bring ideas to mind... in the state I live there is a psychic that is so powerful she’d flip anyone’s life inside out, I”m talkin a room full of ‘deceased’ relatives... and wholistic dr that can read a bodymind and tell someone ever nuance out of alignment, right down to specific organs, just by looking at their tongue. Sounds like nonsense but it’s not. These people are ‘out there’ and they change slices in minutes. (As a specific example) A friend of mine saw that psychic and let go of a thousand pound weight he didn’t even know he was carrying related his deceased brother, a death which occurred decades ago. 

What avenues or vehicles if any so far do you employ / enjoy in regard to expression? Personal examples; playing with my kids, singing-songwriting, poetry, cornball Youtube videos, writing books, spending time in nature / alone. 

Just added a Ten Ox-Herding Pictures interpretation yesterday. Like most of the website, it’s feeling & purification oriented. If you have a chance to read it, let me know if it helps connect any of the dots and or brings up any specific questions. 

The meditations are also all feeling & presence oriented. There’s quite a few at this point to read through, but they’re all very short, and usually one or two just ‘click’, we might say in regard to one’s history / experiences with love. Could be forgiveness for one, acceptance for another, lovingkindness for another, meditative eating or walking for another, etc. 

And most significantly in regard to feeling, though this might not have clicked quite yet, do you have a dreamboard? When you mentioned being ‘walled off’ in some aspects… connection / connectivity comes to mind. I can think of no better ‘emptying of both barrels’ on the connectivity front than a dreamboard, aligning thought with feeling and seeing what’s on your board actually come into your life, and also taking Leo’s LP course to draw out passion(s) & create purpose. 

The books A Course In Miracles, Ask & It Is Given, and The Alchemist come to mind. 

Also, have you watched my first video? Does it bring anything to mind? Bring up any ‘blockages’, or resistance feeling triggers, like rebuttals, past events, etc? That might help ‘crack some eggs’ / uncover introspection avenues & opportunities so to speak. 

Also this video on self referential thoughts… imo it gets straight to the thinnest, most subtle of veils which stands to release / tap into feeling a lot. It’s hard for me to say or know, but I suspect watching this once or twice each day would lead to a significant ‘a ha’, maybe a series of them. Made it as short & as clear as possible with that in mind. 

Another consideration... spiral dynamics. Recognizing the ‘next’ stage can be triggering in the best possible way, related very much to feeling more than I think people typically notice. As a personal example (and a note on how all these things come together) I once took a mushroom trip / solo retreat in which ‘green’ just exploded in me. Immediately signed up for and did a 300 mile bike ride in three days, raising a few thousand dollars for a girl to go to Disneyland through The Make A Wish Foundation. There is a corridor at the very end of the trek with candles & the pictures of hundreds of kids who have passed on, who had their dream fulfilled through the foundation. I’ve taken 40 of 5meo, and 8 g’s of shrooms - and I’ve never “experienced an awakening” anything even remotely close to that corridor. Fuckin cryin right now just from the memory / notion lol! 

That’s a lot / a comprehensive probe, hopefully not overwhelming. Hopefully sparks an insight or two as to considerations for changes going forward.

? 

 

Actually read your post on the ox herding pictures awesome ?  I personally have gotten a few massages holy shit. I really think physical touch can be HUGE in healing trauma. Also finding the right practice. Like mindfulness produced more stress and anxiety monkey mind went crazy. But then switched to do nothing and eureka 

Edited July 22, 2021 by TheLoneSage

[Nahm]

@TheLoneSage Awesome. ? 

[Mjolnir]

@EmptyVase I've been having this Idea as well but I've yet to dive deeper in this. I have been dabbling with thoughts that for example "I cant feel good yet because its not save/solved/good enough yet or what have you". Also or the Idea about what Will they think when I feel xyz? I should Stay flat-leveled so I'm not weird.

Tbh there are multiple roads that I keep going in but they all seem to change in relevance all the time.

Do you maybe know any resources I could learn from to create a better understanding and see if it hits home?

I'm planning to do a detox day to check IT out within this week. Im curious!

Thanks the responses everyone!

Edited July 22, 2021 by Mjolnir

[TheLoneSage]

On 7/18/2021 at 4:49 AM, Nahm said:

@Mjolnir

A session together would be most ideal. I can’t put into words here what happens ‘there’. Shaktipat is actually a very ‘real thing’, and combined with some pretty simple, basic, easy direct experience explorations it’s game / life changing in under two hours. 

How are the basics… sleep, diet, exercise, daily meditation?

How are the excursions… a few days alone in nature, retreats, psyche trips, etc?

What about more ‘direct’ connection activities like reiki or yoga classes, getting a massage, etc? Simple fun things like that can be big feeling game changers very ‘outta nowhere’ like. Also, as examples that might bring ideas to mind... in the state I live there is a psychic that is so powerful she’d flip anyone’s life inside out, I”m talkin a room full of ‘deceased’ relatives... and wholistic dr that can read a bodymind and tell someone ever nuance out of alignment, right down to specific organs, just by looking at their tongue. Sounds like nonsense but it’s not. These people are ‘out there’ and they change slices in minutes. (As a specific example) A friend of mine saw that psychic and let go of a thousand pound weight he didn’t even know he was carrying related his deceased brother, a death which occurred decades ago. 

What avenues or vehicles if any so far do you employ / enjoy in regard to expression? Personal examples; playing with my kids, singing-songwriting, poetry, cornball Youtube videos, writing books, spending time in nature / alone. 

Just added a Ten Ox-Herding Pictures interpretation yesterday. Like most of the website, it’s feeling & purification oriented. If you have a chance to read it, let me know if it helps connect any of the dots and or brings up any specific questions. 

The meditations are also all feeling & presence oriented. There’s quite a few at this point to read through, but they’re all very short, and usually one or two just ‘click’, we might say in regard to one’s history / experiences with love. Could be forgiveness for one, acceptance for another, lovingkindness for another, meditative eating or walking for another, etc. 

And most significantly in regard to feeling, though this might not have clicked quite yet, do you have a dreamboard? When you mentioned being ‘walled off’ in some aspects… connection / connectivity comes to mind. I can think of no better ‘emptying of both barrels’ on the connectivity front than a dreamboard, aligning thought with feeling and seeing what’s on your board actually come into your life, and also taking Leo’s LP course to draw out passion(s) & create purpose. 

The books A Course In Miracles, Ask & It Is Given, and The Alchemist come to mind. 

Also, have you watched my first video? Does it bring anything to mind? Bring up any ‘blockages’, or resistance feeling triggers, like rebuttals, past events, etc? That might help ‘crack some eggs’ / uncover introspection avenues & opportunities so to speak. 

Also this video on self referential thoughts… imo it gets straight to the thinnest, most subtle of veils which stands to release / tap into feeling a lot. It’s hard for me to say or know, but I suspect watching this once or twice each day would lead to a significant ‘a ha’, maybe a series of them. Made it as short & as clear as possible with that in mind. 

Another consideration... spiral dynamics. Recognizing the ‘next’ stage can be triggering in the best possible way, related very much to feeling more than I think people typically notice. As a personal example (and a note on how all these things come together) I once took a mushroom trip / solo retreat in which ‘green’ just exploded in me. Immediately signed up for and did a 300 mile bike ride in three days, raising a few thousand dollars for a girl to go to Disneyland through The Make A Wish Foundation. There is a corridor at the very end of the trek with candles & the pictures of hundreds of kids who have passed on, who had their dream fulfilled through the foundation. I’ve taken 40 of 5meo, and 8 g’s of shrooms - and I’ve never “experienced an awakening” anything even remotely close to that corridor. Fuckin cryin right now just from the memory / notion lol! 

That’s a lot / a comprehensive probe, hopefully not overwhelming. Hopefully sparks an insight or two as to considerations for changes going forward.

? 

 

40 milligrams? Phil you’re a monster ? not sure if you sound like Abraham and Esther Hicks or if Abraham and Esther Hicks sound like you. 

Edited July 22, 2021 by TheLoneSage

[Guest EmptyVase]

21 hours ago, Mjolnir said:

I cant feel good yet because its not save/solved/good enough yet or what have you". Also or the Idea about what Will they think when I feel xyz? I should Stay flat-leveled so I'm not weird.

If I'd obey these thoughts, I'd be numb too.

21 hours ago, Mjolnir said:

Do you maybe know any resources I could learn from to create a better understanding and see if it hits home?

For deeper understanding and clarity, as well as developing intuition, I used the emotional scale and expressive journaling.

[Guest EmptyVase]

This post ties in neatly regarding listening to our guidance system, so I'll add it too:

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/60150-the-power-of-positive-thoughts/

 

[Gabith]

Yesterday after smoking weed, I went to sit in the sofa and listen to music.
Here begins the most beautiful song of my life:

As usual when I hear the first notes and I cry in front of too much beauty.
I felt my tears running down my face and I stayed in the feeling, trying to feel as much as possible. It was big, a huge sensation and almost felt like it was burning my face.
It still felt good but I didn't think it was possible to feel a sensation that strongly and I know I could have gone even further if I had more experience with meditation / letting go.

 

[Guest EmptyVase]

@Gabith

That's so beautiful! Thank you for sharing.