Teal Swan: Why Women Like Assholes + Why Women Aren't Attracted to Nice Guys

[Leo Gura]

3 minutes ago, Abdelghafar said:

Generally speaking, does this work outside of romantic relationships too? e.g. friendships? @Leo Gura

No, but people do respect strength and follow it.

If you assemble a group of 10 random people and you are the strongest in the group, they will follow you.

What we really mean by "asshole" is someone who asserts his agenda on the world and doesn't compromise.

[Leo Gura]

2 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

The dude seems like a highly developed and kind dude.

Who she is no longer sleeping with

[Abdelghafar]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

No, but people do respect strength and follow it.

If you assemble a group of 10 random people and you are the strongest in the group, they will follow you.

Understood.

[Leo Gura]

You need to distinguish between assertiveness and being rude.

Being rude is not what attracts women. Being assertive is. You can be assertive without being rude. Although assertiveness often comes with collateral damage to others and the woman will get damaged by it too.

By definition, highly assertive people will step on everyone, including you. So don't act surprised when he steps on your heart a bit.

[Leo Gura]

6 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Okay, so I suppose you're still feeding yourself of burgers, fries and pizza at every meal ?

We are talking about attraction. When it comes to attraction in food, burgers, fries, and pizza is exactly what people crave despite all their fancy talk of health.

It is possible to transcend lower desires. Of course. But I will never count on people doing so.

When a guy is attracting women, he's not gonna tailor his game to the 1 in 100 female saints. He's gonna tailor his game to average women.

[Abdelghafar]

4 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

What we really mean by "asshole" is someone who asserts his agenda on the world and doesn't compromise.

You need to distinguish between assertiveness and being rude.

Being rude is not what attracts women. Being assertive is. You can be assertive without being rude. Although assertiveness often comes with collateral damage to others and the woman will get damaged by it too.

By definition, highly assertive people will step on everyone, including you. So don't act surprised when he steps on your heart a bit.

Got it.

[knakoo]

13 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Women are attracted to strong men. Strong men tend to be assholes, which is what helps them be strong. The end.

If I was willing to be more of an asshole, I would get laid 3x as much. That is the reality of how this works. The rest is fluffy words that make you feel good about yourself.

You can still take on the asshole role in a playful way during the attraction phase. Why would being an actual asshole give you better result ? I don't see it. 

Can you give an example of a asshole type behaviour that would give you better results but that you are not willing to do ?

[Karmadhi]

@Etherial Cat  How do you feel when you see a tasty pizza and instead you have to eat a salad because it is better for your health even though you enjoy the pizza 100 times more and will crave it 100 times more than the salad after you take 1 bite of it. That is how you girls feel when you pick the good guy versus the asshole.

You can read all the books you want and suffer from obesity for 30 years and then start eating healthy, however you will always find that pizza more plain enjoyable than the salad even if you know LOGICALLY the salad is 100 times better for you. The pizza will not get less tasty because it caused you to become fat and to suffer from obesity. It will not get less tasty after you read about what it does to your body. It will always be tasty, however if you are wise you will prefer healthy stuff over pure dopamine hedonistic stuff.

Edited February 17, 2021 by Karmadhi

[How to be wise]

28 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

which is why I don't find it attractive

Well, attraction isn’t a choice. Nobody chooses their feelings. Feelings of attraction will arise, just like they always have, without your permission.

[Karmadhi]

@Etherial Cat The huge number of hurt girls by assholes and the good guys that struggle with attracting girls tells otherwise.

[knakoo]

35 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

@Etherial Cat  How do you feel when you see a tasty pizza and instead you have to eat a salad because it is better for your health even though you enjoy the pizza 100 times more and will crave it 100 times more than the salad after you take 1 bite of it. That is how you girls feel when you pick the good guy versus the asshole.

You can read all the books you want and suffer from obesity for 30 years and then start eating healthy, however you will always find that pizza more plain enjoyable than the salad even if you know LOGICALLY the salad is 100 times better for you. The pizza will not get less tasty because it caused you to become fat and to suffer from obesity. It will not get less tasty after you read about what it does to your body. It will always be tasty, however if you are wise you will prefer healthy stuff over pure dopamine hedonistic stuff.

As you go deeper in your spiritual path, at least if you do energy work, you can definitely become repulsed by unhealthy food. I suppose it can be similar for unhealthy people, including assholes.

[Preety_India]

4 hours ago, Gesundheit said:

Porn and prostitution are not the same thing as intimacy. The missing thing here is intimacy, not ejaculation.

Men have emotions, and they get hurt

And women don't have emotions?

Are women your objects?

 

[Axiomatic]

56 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Of course, the analogy is not perfect. My point is that our basic instincts are tamed by the experiences we make. You know that eating that crap turns out bad, so you move on!

I just watched your video on wisdom. I'm surprised you do not extend it's circle and principles to attraction and relationships.

Dating an asshole comes with a sharp learning curve.

Do you seriously think we'd be up to sign in over and over again to date wall street hedge fund managers and the likes in an infinite loop dictated by our biology ?

I can see "through" the causality chain of assholery, which is why I don't find it attractive and don't want one anywhere near me. 

yeah im willing to bet your actions wont match your words 100%. its a lot easier to identify healthy food versus the true nature of a human 

Edited February 17, 2021 by Axiomatic

[Axiomatic]

I am obviously attracted to a sexy woman, but I know that she is going to bring more problems versus a less attractive woman who is more grateful. I know this, yet I cant help but take my chances sometimes. And I have been around the block enough to know that the beautiful woman will most likely make my life difficult, so it doesnt throw me off anymore. 

I cant argue with this. Its just truth. Women always seem to argue against the truth though. Like I said, it is probably their biggest blind spot. Just being able to accept these truths will ease their turmoil. You like assholes, you are attracted to them, and no matter how much you deny it, the polite nice dude will somehow be put to the side for this asshole, and women will make up some reason to say its otherwise. 

[Yahya]

How can I use a women just for sex and leave her?

[Axiomatic]

2 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

It would be better if we'd stick to discussing theories instead of compelling me to talk about my personal life to justify my points or list Teal's Swan's lover list since she lost her virginity.

But to address your point, I've had throughout my life plenty of opportunities with heavily loaded dudes which I've turned away because it was going against my current commitment and/or my integrity.

So I think this speaks volume.

ion even know who teal swan is lol 

[Axiomatic]

1 minute ago, Yahya said:

How can I use a women just for sex and leave her?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y97vGnxrF4w

[Lyubov]

I really am torn and confused. I’ve seen personal examples of all kinds with “assholes” doing well with women and guys who were a bit more timid doing well. I’m so tired of this “asshole” tag though. Because basically what it means is a guy who is putting his own interests, desires and self bias before his partner, which is kinda paradoxical that this is found to be attractive considering partnership. I don’t think just because a guy is self interested and self biased he is automatically an asshole. An asshole to me is someone who is selfish to the point of abnormality and abuse. 

[Preety_India]

Women need to raise their consciousness. And stop dating assholes. This whole thing that attraction is biological is nuts.. Thinking can change biology just like mind reset can remove years of genetic anxiety. 

Anything is possible. So all the assholes can sink into oblivion. We don't need them. 

Women want good men. Survival is not our fault. 

And with more women getting stronger and independent, they are more likely to choose good polite men. See it for yourself. 

So many of my successful women colleagues are married to nice men.. 

The trend is shifting. Assholes won't stand a chance. 

Talk about conscious dating. Women are not dumb creatures as everyone is trying to automatically assume. 

Women are moving in their own direction of consciousness. 

At one point domestic violence was a part of a relationship with no laws or ways for women to speak about it. 

Today women don't put up with such men. They move on to a better man. Women have a good future and times are changing. 

So all this "women like assholes" crap will come to an end one day 

Some men just need a reason to act like assholes and then justify it.. YouTube is already banning such pickup channels. Red pill psychology will only last so long. At some point women are going to be fed up with all this abuse. More women are opening up about emotional abuse. 

We are going to put an end to this menace. You don't get to blame everything on women. 

Women aren't married to assholes. They are married to gentlemen. If they were married to assholes they would have been dead. Wake up. 

 

[Axiomatic]

3 minutes ago, Lyubov said:

I really am torn and confused. I’ve seen personal examples of all kinds with “assholes” doing well with women and guys who were a bit more timid doing well. I’m so tired of this “asshole” tag though. Because basically what it means is a guy who is putting his own interests, desires and self bias before his partner, which is kinda paradoxical that this is found to be attractive considering partnership. I don’t think just because a guy is self interested and self biased he is automatically an asshole. An asshole to me is someone who is selfish to the point of abnormality and abuse. 

Trust me, it was probably the biggest mind fuck I had to figure out when I was young. I thought that being a gentleman and polite and courteous was key, but they either didnt respect it or found it phoney. I did the opposite. Act cocky, dont give a fuck, and it worked for me.

 

I dont want it to be that way, but its what works. At least in my experience.