Should you fap when you get an erection? (How to know when your body wants to natural

[Javfly33]

How to know when your body wants to naturally fap and not it's just because you want to binge on porn and a distraction?

When you are at home and you get an erection, should you fap, and get it out of the way (without bringing at all on porn . Just do the minimal thing to fap and that's it).

See the problem I see is that most people fight constantly urges and cravings to release sexual tension, but then when they do they make the ritual an addiction: they engage in porn, fetishes, etc.

And then they make a hurted identity out of it which reinforced the urges and binges when they do relapse 

Wouldn't be better to just fap, no matter how much times ,but make it totally mechanic, anti binge, and shameful free?

[WonderSeeker]

@Javfly33 You'll know when to do it through intuition.

Perhaps changing paradigms would help. Try fapping to feel into your body and learn about your own sexuality, rather than the old way of doing it to release tension. Thus, when the urge comes up, only do it if you genuinely want to.

Mechanical fapping, "just to get it outta the way,"  was never fun for me personally. But when I tried doing it to learn about my body, it changed my whole view on it. 

[Arcangelo]

Never waste an erection

[Osaid]

IME, it seems that your body will actually tell you. If you abstain from sexual stimuli for a while, your body will randomly get horny at a certain point, out of nowhere.
 

I ended up climaxing yesterday without even looking at porn. I just randomly got horny on my bed and decided "fuck it" and went and did it. I had a wet dream that same night, probably because I abstained for like a good 4 days prior to that.

I also remember waking up certain days super horny. Like my mind was fixated on it. It really felt like my body wanted it. 
 

There are times when you get horny without any previous intention or planning to get horny, like the desire didn't even come from you. I think recognizing that is key.

My theory is that this is your body's way of keeping itself healthy and active in that area. If you abstain for a while, your body will start to test itself through wet dreams and random bouts of horniness.

7 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

See the problem I see is that most people fight constantly urges and cravings to release sexual tension, but then when they do they make the ritual an addiction: they engage in porn, fetishes, etc.

And then they make a hurted identity out of it which reinforced the urges and binges when they do relapse 

This is a big mistake. It's better to just do it if you're having severe sexual desires. I don't think it's good to keep that energy in.

I went on strict no-fap for a month while fighting severe sexual desires and it really messed up my libido and erections. I went from fapping pretty much daily straight to a whole month of not fapping.

I don't buy that strict abstinence is always good. I think it is way more nuanced than that. Your body will eventually just start ejaculating in bed to combat it. You need some sort of balance, and you should not force it. If you can't abstain without edging or having severe sexual desires then it is better to just do it at that point.

There is a healthy way to abstain, where you truly have no outstanding urges to masturbate during that period. Then there are the people who try to fake that level of development, and force themselves to abstain despite having intense sexual desires.

7 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

Wouldn't be better to just fap, no matter how much times ,but make it totally mechanic, anti binge, and shameful free?

I've felt great and shame-free every time I've fapped. I don't get people who say they feel "disgusted" or "depressed" after fapping, I really think that's a separate issue.

I think sexual transmutation may also come into play here. If you are busy with your life and socially active I find that you can go a few days without fapping and you won't even notice it.
 

[Leo Gura]

Stop asking us when you should fap.