How to deal with negative people?

[BlackMaze]

Is there a way to not get affected? I may be able to do it for some time but it throws me off balance eventually. There is always negativity around me. Maybe i was too or still am sometimes but i can snap out of it. However some people can't. I would like to help them but i don't know how. It annoys me. They annoy me. Changing environment is not an option in the near future. I may be feeling great but then i will see a very depressed face like their life is over or something and sometimes i just get angry. Or the pettiness in work environments. How can i stop this from affecting my mood? I've been very patient for many years. I can't tolerate negativity anymore. I also can't tolerate stupid people full of themselves or toxic managers. Sure i could try to love people but it's so energy depleting that i can't. I keep losing focus from what matters. How can i prevent this? 

[UNZARI]

@BlackMaze you can’t prevent anything but just that fact that you’re acknowledging this about how u feel is great. I work a door to door job and meet very negative people everyday, also very awesome people. I’m very sensitive but what helps me is just being honest with how I feel to myself and loving the feeling they bring me, with that you end up letting it go.

[BlackMaze]

@UNZARI thank you i will try it

[Preety_India]

The biggest thing that helped me was this insight I had during my meditation.

When someone says something negative to you, it's reflects and says more about them and less about you. So it's their karma to handle and not your burden 

 

[Heaven]

Accept them as they are. No need to change anything.

Your ego wants to change them which creates resistance and therefore you suffer..

Try to notice whenever you resist something and understand it’s the illusion misinterpreted reality. 
Once you will release any resistance Love and Bliss will arise.

Hope it helps?

[BlackMaze]

@Preety_India i agree 100%. However it's not only about people saying things to me. I can handle this most of the time. It's about all negativity. What about when a person close to you is very depressed? I can't do much to help. If you see this kind of thing in different forms for years it affects you whether you want it or not and it becomes your burden when you keep seeing it and can't remove yourself from the different situations. 

@Heaven thank you. Actually the other question i asked and you answered was because i thought about this question more deeply. If you are not your ego anymore of course nothing can affect you. This is the ultimate solution for not being affected by others. This sounds good and all but what happens if this happens? What will happen is very unpredictable. I think i read this somewhere maybe it was a quote from an actualized video: it's all fun and games until someone loses an ego. Someone might find this funny because they don't really understand what i mean but i'm scared of losing an ego. Maybe i'm not ready to lose an ego. How will i know? Should i climb the maslow's pyramid first for example? How dangerous is it to be egoless when your life is not already in place? 

[Preety_India]

@BlackMaze  I look at it this way. There's nothing you can do to change people. It's a separate world when two people think separately. They will shoot the messenger anyway. If you have positivity and great advice, you're better off giving it to someone who cares to listen and resonates with your message. If you offered advice to people who are resistant to change, then they will fire back at you or throw away your message, it's a waste of time and puts you in a negative state because of their resistance, but they are lots of people who are ready to listen and use your positive message, try being with them more often. 

 

[BlackMaze]

@Preety_India thank you 

I really appreciate your answer you are right. 

[Megan Alecia]

Look inside you. Be honest. Can you genuinely, honestly live with yourself? 

If the answer's "yes", then your problem with other people is solved. 

Edited February 9, 2021 by Megan Alecia

[BlackMaze]

@Megan Alecia of course but it's also not so simple. I experienced so much negativity from others in my life that i don't think i can tolerate it anymore. Ideally i would handpick the people i want in my life. I currently can do this only to an extent. There are many situations that i can't avoid. My motive behind this is selfish. I want to create a good life. To do this i need to go above and beyond by taking action. Now i know how to take effective action but to do this and sustain it i need energy. My energy is raised by living heathier and then situations keep arising that completely drain my energy. My energy is not unlimited and is needed to stay focused at creating stuff. Negative people rob my energy and i need to stop it from happening. 

[BlackMaze]

@Jirh if i said i have tried it i would be lying. Kind of hard if you have to wake up very early for work though. 

[Megan Alecia]

@BlackMaze "Leave or accept" ~ Eckhart

You need to trust in yourself and life. Or you'll end up a pessimist, which isn't good. I myself am kind of fluctuating between the two, hopefully I get out of this alive and well.

Goodluck to you as well. 

Life is hard-- I mean world war 1?2? Rwanda, Serbia, Iraq?? All these terrible wars and atrocities have happened in recent memory, and among the worse in history. But nowadays we typically condemn them as bad. We cannot change what happened, can we? We can only learn from these events. And obviously I could say, "Yeah, war is bad, everyone knows that already" But that doesn't change anything, does it? Learning is painful.... but look at the outcome. Like, if most people REALLY learned that war is bad, imagine how much better this world would become. 

Edited February 9, 2021 by Megan Alecia

[blackchair]

accept them as part of you.

[Nahm]

@BlackMaze

Focus on what you do want. Experience becomes it. There is no other possibility. 

[Applegarden]

20 hours ago, Megan Alecia said:

Look inside you. Be honest. Can you genuinely, honestly live with yourself? 

If the answer's "yes", then your problem with other people is solved. 

Ohh that is 100% yes for me, I know pretty much exactly what I want, if I didn't have enemity problems, I would have done what I wanted and kept doing it, as I am anyway...

[Applegarden]

7 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@BlackMaze

Focus on what you do want. Experience becomes it. There is no other possibility. 

Yes this is a good method. Trust the life process and visualize what you want every day. This is so underrated.