How to learn to talk a long time?

[Ruslankungrufu]

Hey everybody! How to master the art of verbal improvisation? Can you tell me about courses or books? I have to say 90% and she has to say 10%!) Maybe this art is called storytelling? I want to talk for a loong time and come up with interesting stories

Thank you!

[Leo Gura]

That's very challenging.

In practice, you just gotta push yourself into sets and force yourself to keep them going as long as possible.

Try to make your goal to open a set of girls and talk to them for 60 minutes.

Keep your talk emotional and illogical. Telling stories is good. Talking about yourself is good.

Most extroverts are masters of talking about nothing and talking about themselves.

You'd be amazed how far you can get your foot in the door just talking about yourself like a pure narcissist.

[Hello from Russia]

7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

That's very challenging.

In practice, you just gotta push yourself into sets and force yourself to keep them going as long as possible.

Try to make your goal to open a set of girls and talk to them for 60 minutes.

Keep your talk emotional and illogical. Telling stories is good. Talking about yourself is good.

Most extroverts are masters of talking about nothing and talking about themselves.

You'd be amazed how far you can get your foot in the door just talking about yourself like a pure narcissist.

Is it usually done by communicating a lot of personal value (in your experience) ? Like, all your communication faculties scream "holy, this is such a high value guy, I should listen to him or else I'll get a FOMO (!!!)"

[Leo Gura]

17 minutes ago, Hello from Russia said:

Is it usually done by communicating a lot of personal value (in your experience) ? Like, all your communication faculties scream "holy, this is such a high value guy, I should listen to him or else I'll get a FOMO (!!!)"

No

It's just mindless talk that has no value at all. Like sitting on the porch and spitting sunflower seed shells to the side.

Say that ten times fast

 

[Recursoinominado]

Vomit words, don't think, don't judge.

Accept that you are going to say some stupid shit but you are also going to say some genius shit.

I assure you that girls will forget the stupid shit you say and remember the fun witty things because of how it made them feel.

Especially with girls, they pay attention to your general vibe, not your words.

You can speak non-sense but in a fun and charismatic way, people will love you.

You can also speak anything with a sexual vibe. Women are masters of this.

Flirting is mostly implicit, you can talk about doing groceries but if you put out a sexual vibe, women will get it and play along. 

Edited February 4, 2021 by Recursoinominado

[charlie cho]

@Ruslankungrufu this is my specialty, although not very ept in gaming people. One piece of advice from a fellow novice, be loose. Its not about gaining more knowledge by reading self help books or somebody. Its about releasing knowledge out of your system so you can be more fun and not too logical.

Try to give the other person more fun than trying to take something from them. Really think deep about what makes people have a good time when they would socialize with you. Go out and watch and observe people in your life who are popular (in a good way) and who really make people love themselves and laugh. And try to emulate those peoples vibes and energy. Because social interaction is not about words... its about vibes. I can say this because im very good at making friends. And really try to be a good person at heart. Deeply be a nice guy, and people sense that off of you, even though they might not right away, but when they do , they will try to be friends with yiu cause you are geniunely trying to help them. 

I read once about a chinese emperor, when he was in high school, he was such a popular guy and he loved going to bars and meeting women, wearinv awesome clothes, riding horses when he himself was a poor bastard (he actually didnt know who his father was), but he was able to recruit talents to join his cause because since his school years, people loved him because he really wanted to do best for his friends and people and he never looked down on people just because they were unpopular or poor or had low social status. Right now he is the most popular emperor known in whole of vietnam korea japana and china.

You wanna be like that emperor, and not be hypocritical about being non judgemental 

[StarStruck]

Having a million dollar mouth piece is something else than portraying value. They are two different skill sets and they should be practised separately.

To talk endlessly you basically have to stop judging yourself and learn to express your flow of thoughts into words. Try some association exercises. Talk about a tree for 2 minutes for example. Then jump to another topic and talk about a leaf. And so on..repeat for 20 minutes.

I don't know much about portraying value but others have given you good advice on that.

Edited February 4, 2021 by StarStruck

[Preety_India]

Have a flow in your words 

 

[aurum]

5 hours ago, Ruslankungrufu said:

Hey everybody! How to master the art of verbal improvisation? Can you tell me about courses or books? I have to say 90% and she has to say 10%!) Maybe this art is called storytelling? I want to talk for a loong time and come up with interesting stories

An improv comedy class can help.

Honestly I think it was pickup that helped me the most in this area though. In pickup you're constantly being pushed to be creative and come up with things on the fly. You really have to surrender a lot of your "criteria of success", i.e what you think is "good enough" to be said.

You can also just practice with a video camera. Turn on the camera and just start talking about anything and see how long you can go, keeping it relatively coherent and engaging.

Recording yourself also has the added benefit of you becoming aware of all your microexpressions and places where your subcommunications might be off. Highly recommended.

3 hours ago, Hello from Russia said:

Is it usually done by communicating a lot of personal value (in your experience) ? Like, all your communication faculties scream "holy, this is such a high value guy, I should listen to him or else I'll get a FOMO (!!!)"

That makes it way harder than it needs to be.

You could open a girl and just start talking about the wall in front of you. Your words don't matter as much as you might think. Especially if it's at night and everyone is in more "party mode" where things don't have to make sense.

It's mostly about vibes.

[UNZARI]

@Leo Gura I work a door to door job and I often feel weird when I tak about myself the whole time to the customer but they almost always get really interested. You really think talking like a narcissist would work? Lol I wanna try but it feels dirty 

[LastThursday]

So:

"Hey. I noticed your pink shoes from a mile away. Where did you get them? No! I don't want a pair for myself. I was with my sister the other day, and she was trying on the exact same pair. What? No she didn't end up getting them, way out of her league, she's more of a flat shoes kinda girl. But I see that you're not. They really work for you. Actually. Show me your calves... Wow. I mean just wow. I've been working on my calves, but obviously you can't tell because of these trousers I'm wearing. I don't normally wear trousers... LOL, no I'm a shorts kind of guy. You should see me in the summer. These clubs and wearing these rags do my manly calves no justice.  So? What sort of calves do you like in a man?..."

That sort of continuous bullshit. And obviously smirk like a mischevious kid throughout.

Edited February 4, 2021 by LastThursday

[Leo Gura]

10 hours ago, UNZARI said:

@Leo Gura I work a door to door job and I often feel weird when I tak about myself the whole time to the customer but they almost always get really interested. You really think talking like a narcissist would work? Lol I wanna try but it feels dirty 

No doubt it works.

Because it takes a stranger time to warm up to you. By talking casually about yourself you put them at ease amd give them something in the conversation to think about and latch onto.

If they hear something interesting they will want to ask questions, and soon a deep conversation forms.

This is a good skill to practice on the airplane when you fly. Make it a goal to start a convo that lasts the entire flight long. It's doable. I've done it. It's also much more fun than sitting their like a cold zombie.

What's the best way to start a deep convo on a plane? Just start talking about yourself like the persona already knows you.

"So when we land I'm going to get a burger and a coffee. And tomorrow I'm going fishing...."

Bottom line: if you want to be a master of starting conversations you must lead them. You must do the initial heavy lifting.

[Ruslankungrufu]

thank you all!  I think everyone's opinion is important. It has its pros and cons and it is very important to remain yourself. the primary thing is to want it!

[Ruslankungrufu]

18 hours ago, charlie cho said:

@Ruslankungrufu this is my specialty, although not very ept in gaming people. One piece of advice from a fellow novice, be loose. Its not about gaining more knowledge by reading self help books or somebody. Its about releasing knowledge out of your system so you can be more fun and not too logical.

Try to give the other person more fun than trying to take something from them. Really think deep about what makes people have a good time when they would socialize with you. Go out and watch and observe people in your life who are popular (in a good way) and who really make people love themselves and laugh. And try to emulate those peoples vibes and energy. Because social interaction is not about words... its about vibes. I can say this because im very good at making friends. And really try to be a good person at heart. Deeply be a nice guy, and people sense that off of you, even though they might not right away, but when they do , they will try to be friends with yiu cause you are geniunely trying to help them. 

I read once about a chinese emperor, when he was in high school, he was such a popular guy and he loved going to bars and meeting women, wearinv awesome clothes, riding horses when he himself was a poor bastard (he actually didnt know who his father was), but he was able to recruit talents to join his cause because since his school years, people loved him because he really wanted to do best for his friends and people and he never looked down on people just because they were unpopular or poor or had low social status. Right now he is the most popular emperor known in whole of vietnam korea japana and china.

You wanna be like that emperor, and not be hypocritical about being non judgemental 

you speak the truth and It makes sense. what kind of emperor are we talking about?

[Parththakkar12]

22 hours ago, Ruslankungrufu said:

Hey everybody! How to master the art of verbal improvisation? Can you tell me about courses or books? I have to say 90% and she has to say 10%!) Maybe this art is called storytelling? I want to talk for a loong time and come up with interesting stories

Thank you!

Here's what I'll say - find commonalities. Whether you're doing verbal improvisation or something else, find a way to include the other person in your life.

I'd actually suggest you let her do the talking so that you'll be able to then make sense of that situation and come up with ideas for where you want to take it. How much do you want to talk? Just be honest. How much do you want to bullshit yourself and her that the talk is important? It's not! You just want to be taking it to where you want to.

[charlie cho]

@Ruslankungrufu his name is Liu Bei. Read Chu Shi Biao - Liu Bei will be written as the "late emperor" in the writing - and many accounts of him and you'll get the sense of what kind of person he was for the people that worked for his cause. You can feel the vibe from many of his historical accounts, probably his greatest talent that led him to be emperor was socializing, being popular, and getting really talented people working for him with love and devotion without being too forceful or demanding to those ministers, warriors, and peasants. Many talented alpha males are prone to exert force in order to accomplish their ambitions, but he was apparently not like that really. 

Edited February 5, 2021 by charlie cho

[UNZARI]

@Leo Gura no definitely thats true, I rarely meet a super extroverted person who carries the whole conversation for me. When I do it’s nice but more often it’s dead silence if I don’t start something. I’m the one going to the door so I can see how it would make sense anyway to guide the conversation 

thnaks man ?

[charlie cho]

@Ruslankungrufu I realize the advice I gave you revolves more on the big picture scale but sometimes can be perceived as disadvantageous in specific situations. Recently, I experienced having to talk with a girl 90% of the time without any ease. Usually, I would spit out words the girl would be interested in so that she could contribute to the conversation, but since the club was so loud even talking by the ear wasn't audible. Communication between me and her was unsubstantial, yet I haven't found my way to plough through that noise to continue the conversation going. In other words, I HAD to talk 90% of the time with her not even being able to listen to me. In a house party, I had no problem, but in a place where you have to keep talking and talking to get the girl interested and have fun, I suggest doing what Leo said above. 

The girl needs to know who the fuck you are before she gets interested in you. I say this to you because I find myself wanting to remind myself of what Leo said in this thread, and I think it's valuable advice for my current situation with interacting with women. In conclusion, I think talking like a "narcissists" is good as far as you are genuinely letting the girl have a good time. 

Edited March 7, 2021 by charlie cho