First No Self Experience?

[Guest username]

I started consciousness work a few months ago as an emotionally wounded newbie, and I would still categorize myself as such.

Though, thanks to some innate characteristics like my radical openmindedness and strong curiosity, I have been able to benefit from advanced personal development despite being a very low cconsciousness person.

I initially thought I had my first no self experience several months ago when first starting but can realize that it was just delusion.

This time was a totally different feeling. I was engaging in a self-inquiry session, and after about 50 minutes I felt a totally new sensation. The body felt like a mere object, a part of this endless nothingness. I can't aptly describe what happened since it only lasted three seconds or so, but I don't recall having experienced anything like that before.

I should add that my conciousness and self actualization work has started to pay off. I had crippling anxiety, depression, fear, victim mentality, narcissism , entitlement, feelings of inferiority and superiority, over thinking, and many other severe neuroses. I had lost all my friendships, had to take time off from school, and was on the verge of suicide. After taking lots of action and serious study of multiple sources, I can actually say that I am decently happy most of the time.

 

That aside, my experience of whatever that was was pure terror for the few seconds it lasted. Though it wasn't an ordinary terror such as a fear of some danger, rather a complete overwhelming awe of something that I just couldn't even grasp or adequately put to words. Since my experience was so brief, I don't know if this is at all a valuable insight or if my imagination was playing tricks on me. But something was different and I wanted to take note of it.

Eager to hear your thoughts.

[Leo Gura]

@username If there was existential terror, you're definitely on the right track.

But that was only the tip of the iceberg. So keep going!

[cetus]

7 hours ago, username said:

, I don't know if this is at all a valuable insight or if my imagination was playing tricks on me. But something was different and I wanted to take note of it.

@username Sounds like the real deal, even if it was just for 3 seconds. Just the fact that you could let go of yourself is a milestone along this journey.

If you want to try something really cool, do that again in a secluded part of nature. Maybe take a hike in the woods, sit there and just let it happen.

If it does, It may feel as if god is seeing through your eyes. The division between what is you and what is nature will melt away and become one field of existence. Totally amazing stuff!