Living Through Compassion

[ajasatya]

2016, oct 18th

• healthy meals
• university career time investment
• happiness sharing
• reading
• yogasanas
• meditation
• dancing

master classes are finally becoming easier. the professor will start demanding coding homework. coding sometime sis easier than doing complicated math.

lunch was DELICIOUS!

i read a bit more the tao of physics. this book is amazing me!

i wrote a zen koan and did a drawing to go with it. here it is! it says "if the leaf becomes the soil, when exactly is the leaf no more?"

the yoga class was cool, even though my muscles hurt a little right now, which is normal.

after that, my girlfriend came here and we danced kizomba. we're getting better! then we talked a little about her family. we also created new possibilities for the future and made ourselves friends with them. i find this a powerful exercise. training the mind to adapt easily to situations.

[ajasatya]

2016, oct 19th

• healthy meals
• happiness sharing
• reading
• self-inquiry & dharma contemplation
• deep insights
• meditation
• yogasanas
• zen passo a passo time investment
• ashram duties

woke up a little late and read some tao of physics. as a computer scientist who studies the development of intelligence with biologists, that book caught me up.

some ramana maharashi's videos inspired me and i was able to practice some self-inquiry and attain profound insights!

the yoga class was SO GOOD! we practiced some vinyasas. i think i'll practice ashtanga yoga after healing my lower back completely.

the zen passo a passo session was awesome. the sangha was really into it. everyone was so connected on the experience sharing moment.

then i had a good moment with my girlfriend. it's been 3 months since we started a long term relationship and SO MUCH already happened. we decided to break celibacy for now because it's being too much for her. she recognized that it was turning into a sexual repression so we're going to slow down a bit.

then she went to sleep and i cleaned the meditation hall in a refreshing solitude atmosphere.

stillness...

Edited October 20, 2016 by iago iriarte arhatha

[ajasatya]

2016, oct 20th

• healthy meals
• university career time investment
• self-inquiry & dharma contemplation
• happiness sharing
• reading
• yogasanas
• meditation
• deep talks

revisited this video and realized how accurate it is! damn, it's been so long. i could not grasp his words back then. i'm going to read his book Spiritual Enlightenment - The Damnedest Thing.

watched this steven norquist's video, which was really good in the beginning but then it became boring. i was curious about his book but i noticed it's too abstract and not very practical. it's full of ideas. i want jed mckenna instead!

i read a bit more of the tao of physics. it's going very well.

yoga class was a bit frustrating. too many postures that are hard for me. i had to deal with a lot of pain but i know its for the best.

then i went to my girlfriend's. we had an amazing dinner.

[ajasatya]

2016, oct 21th

• healthy meals
• happiness sharing
• meditation
• bike rides
• deep talks
• reading
• self-inquiry & dharma contemplation

spent the morning and the afternoon with my girlfriend. we experienced a deep paired meditation. it felt extraordinary. we were not following any given technique. we were just doing as we felt like. probably some tantra practice in the end.

then i came back home and read some tao of physics.

after that, i went to dragão do mar and listened to some seminar about chakras, meditation and enlightenment. the course is taught by this group. i was facepalming internally with almost every sentence the woman wold say. i went to talk with her after the end of the seminar and she was very stubborn saying that i had to study the infinite amount of books they had to be able to understand enlightenment. they said that it had something to do with plenty of knowledge, mystical powers etc. oh well...

then i came back home and made an special pasta with matu, another resident here in the ashram. now i'm finishing the journal. good night!

[ajasatya]

2016, oct 22th

• healthy meals
• bike rides
• happiness sharing
• meditation
• self-inquiry & dharma contemplation
• reading
• deep talks
• deep insights
• enlightenment

i went to pick up my girlfriend's keyboard but it was not fixed yet. so i got back home for lunch.

after lunch i watched this adyashanti's video, and it felt great. then i went to the beach with matu and we had a great time.

after the beach i went to practice zen with this sangha. great practice. great talk after practice.

on my way back home i was hit with a shocking wave of contentment from having realized who i am. this ecstasy is lasting until now and i don't think it's going away anytime soon. if it does, no worries. but i'm feeling completely fulfilled right now.

[ajasatya]

2016, oct 24th

this is my last post on this journal. i've done it. there's nothing else to do.

i've been living in this ashram for 4 months now and i'll be here for 2 more months enjoying stillness.

this journal contains the last 20 days before my enlightenment. it took me 1 year and a half to finally realize truth completely.

no more internal battles, nothing to achieve and nothing to attach to. life is a game for us to play with.

[Milos Uzelac]

On 10/24/2016 at 6:51 PM, ajasatya said:

2016, oct 24th

this is my last post on this journal. i've done it. there's nothing else to do.

i've been living in this ashram for 4 months now and i'll be here for 2 more months enjoying stillness.

this journal contains the last 20 days before my enlightenment. it took me 1 year and a half to finally realize truth completely.

no more internal battles, nothing to achieve and nothing to attach to. life is a game for us to play with.

This journal gave me hope for a possibility of a similiar life that you have shared. I have to jump and do it!

Thanks for revealing how amazing life can be!

[Ayilton]

On 10/4/2016 at 6:26 AM, ajasatya said:

2016, oct 3th

• healthy meals
• happiness sharing
• yogasanas
• meditation
• self-inquiry & dharma contemplation
• ashram duties
• actualized.org contributions

woke up in my girlfriend's bedroom and we shared some intimacy. after that we had a breakfast full of smiles and deep eye contact. she went to university and i came back home on my bike. when i arrived i saw my muslim friend waiting for me. he had just arrived too. he did not tell me that he was coming over. what a surprise! he wanted to see the place i live in. we had a pleasant talk about buddhism and islam. then he left and i watched leo's low quality vs high quality consciousness video. then i contacted the daissen-ji zen center from florianópolis to confirm my presence on the sesshin they're organizing, which will happen in november.

lunch time! we had a happy meal with everyone from the ashram then i came back to study some more of leo's content and participate on the forum until the yoga teacher came. the yoga class was excellent and then i took a bath for my monday zazen with the daissen-ji sangha.

after zazen i went to eat açaí with another practitioner. he's a physicist and we talked about the dharma and science. then i came back home on my bike and started to clean the meditation hall, as i do every monday and wednesday.

i started to create portuguese subtitles for the last leo's video and i plan to keep up with this work. then i came here to start this self-actualization journal.

Do you speak portuguese !!!

[Arcangelo]

On 10/3/2016 at 9:43 PM, ajasatya said:

for 2 months i wasn't allowed to have an erection otherwise i could break the stitches

I had a hydrocele in my left testicle, I had surgery too.

How did you manage to not having erections while you were sleeping?

[ajasatya]

3 hours ago, Arcangelo said:

How did you manage to not having erections while you were sleeping?

i don't know... the body just knew it somehow.