Let's Get Practical #3: Raising Self-Esteem

Raphael · July 27, 2021

27/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

I'll let my child-self express himself
my child-self would feel closer to me
my child-self would feel more comfortable with me
my relationship with my child-self would improve
my child-self would talk to me
my child-self would like me more
my child-self would show more playfulness

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

my teenage-self would finally feel understood
my teenage-self won't be ashamed to express his emotions
my teenage-self would communicate with me more
I'll give my hand to my teenage-self
I'll stop shaming my teenage-self
I'll embrace my teenage-self

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

they trust me more
they communicate with me more
they express their emotions more
I can help them more
I'm becoming more authentic
they are becoming more authentic
I feel more whole
I feel more integrated

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

my child-self feel safer
my child-self feel better nurtured
my child-self can express himself safely and freely
I'm growing
I'm deepening my relationship with my child-self
my child-self is showing himself more
my child-self feels trusted

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

my teenage-self feels safer
my teenage-self feels that he can open up
my teenage-self feel more understood
my teenage-self trust me more
my teenage-self feels relieved
I'm deepening my relationship with my teenage-self
I'm becoming stronger and more integrated

Raphael · July 28, 2021

28/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

he would express his curiosity
my child-self would show himself more
he would express his needs
he would be more comfortable with me
he would ask for help
I'll give him help
I'll do the best that I can to understand him

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

I would let him do things by himself
he would show up
he would feel more comfortable with me
he would show how mean he is
he would cry in my arms
he would show how much he is hurt
he would communicate with me
I would help him

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

they are showing up more
they are trusting me more
I start to feel them
I start to understand them
I am deepening my relationship with them
we are starting to heal together

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

he feels more secure
he feels protected
he feels that he can trust me
he may be see this safe space as a prison
I realize that this safe space is may be too much
I understand that he wants more freedom
I understand that this safe space is overprotective
I understand that my child-self wants to get out of this safe space
I understand that I'm protecting my child-self too much and that this is hurting him

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

he feels controlled
he doesn't like to feel controlled
he wants to go out
he wants to express all his dirtiness
he doesn't like me
he doesn't trust me
he wants to do things by himself
I understand that I need to stop controlling my teenage-self
I understand that my teenage-self is wise enough to do things by himself
I understand that the best thing that I can do to my teenage-self is to let him be free
My younger selves don't want safety. They don't like safety, they feel overprotected, they feel over-controlled, they feels like they are in prison. What they want is complete freedom.

Raphael · July 29, 2021

29/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

I'll accept my child-self more
my child-self would accept me more
I try to understand the struggles of my child-self
I'll become more honest with my child-self
my child-self is opening more
my child-self is trusting me more

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

I'll allow my teenage-self to express all his emotions
I'll give my teenage-self the support that he needs without over-controlling him, nor spoon-feeding him
my teenage-self is getting motivated
my teenage-self wants to prove himself
my teenage-self is opening up to me
my teenage-self is becoming courageous
my teenage-self is trusting me more

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

I become more comfortable with them
our communication gets better
our relationship gets better
we are working better together
we are doing better together
we can trust each other in dealing with life's situations

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

my child-self don't feel safe but oppressed
I understand that my safe space needs to be properly balanced to provide enough safety without over-controlling my child-self
this safe space allows my child-self to express himself fully and safely
my child-self is trusting me
my child-self starts to feel safe without being oppressed
my child-self is appreciating me more
my child-self feels in security

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

my teenage-self doesn't trust me because he feels over-controlled
I understand that this safe space needs to protect while at the same time being as minimal as possible to allow my teenage-self to have a lot of freedom
I understand that a balanced safe space is what my teenage-self needs more
my teenage-self is starting to trust me more
my teenage-self feels that he his free to express himself wherever he wants while still feeling safe
my teenage-self is becoming more and more authentic
my teenage-self is loving me more and more
my relationship with my teenage-self is skyrocketing
my communication with my teenage-self is skyrocketing
my love for my teenage-self is skyrocketing

Raphael · July 30, 2021

30/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

I'm becoming more open with my child-self
I'm becoming more playful with my child-self
my child-self would trust me more
my child-self would express himself to me
my child-self would share with me
my child-self would embrace me

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

my teenage-self would feel more comfortable with me
my teenage-self would open up to me
my teenage-self would feel an emotional connection
I'll understand my teenage-self better
I'll understand my teenage-self needs
I'm becoming more integrated

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

I become more comfortable with my younger selves
we become more vulnerable
my younger selves enjoys more and more my presence
my younger selves are becoming more peaceful
they become more honest
they are opening up emotionally
they are expressing themselves more and more

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

my child-self feels safe only is this safe space is minimal
I'm becoming more healthy
my child-self feels protected
my child-self is trusting me more
my child-self feels that he can express himself in safety
my child-self is appreciating me more

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

my teenage-self doesn't want it
my teenage-self feel safe only if I keep the safety as minimal as possible which then allows him to have freedom
my teenage-self starts to trust me
my teenage-self is getting some courage
my teenage-self is getting more motivated
my teenage-self is expressing himself more and more authentically
my teenage-self feels safe

Raphael · July 31, 2021

31/07/2021 (Week 27)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

create a balanced safe space for my younger selves that allows them to feel safe without feeling oppressed and at the same time allow them to have a lot of freedom
give help to my younger selves
nurture my younger selves
am kind to my younger selves
become genuinely interested in my younger selves
give love to my younger selves
encourage my younger selves
let go of judgments of my younger selves
support my younger selves

Raphael · August 1, 2021

01/08/2021 (Week 27)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

rebuild the connection with my child-self
rebuild the connection with my teenage-self
listen to my younger selves
give the love that my younger selves needs
create a safe space for my younger selves without over-protecting them which gives them the freedom to express themselves
trust my younger selves
love my younger selves

Raphael · August 2, 2021

02/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

a good boy
a very intelligent person
a strange person
a head in the clouds person
a beautiful person
a handsome person
a dependent person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

a dumb person
a weak person
a shy person
a incompetent person
a weird person
a not normal person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I'm very intelligent
that I can do good
that I forget things, therefore, cannot do stuff
that I'm very incompetent and dependent on others
that I look good
that I'm strange

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I am weak
that I am shy
that I'm going to fail
that I'm going to be incompetent forever
that I'm not social
that I'm an idiot
that I lack confidence and self-esteem

Raphael · August 2, 2021

14 hours ago, lxlichael said:

@Raphael Integration work is difficult. Keep going.

Thanks.

Raphael · August 3, 2021

03/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

a good person
a smart person
a beautiful person
head in the cloud person
a baby
a anot normal person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

a dumb person
an incompetent person
weak person
shy person
a baby
a not normal person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I can do good
that I'm very intelligent
that I'm a dreamer
that I'm not normal
that I need to care about others
that I'm great

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I am dumb
that I am incompetent
that I am socially awkward
that I can't succeed in life
that I'm not enough
that I'm terrible
that I cannot communicate with people
that I cannot be myself
that I am a failure

Raphael · August 5, 2021

04/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

a good person
a smart person
a beautiful person
a baby
a helpful person
a useful person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

a dumb person
a weak person
an incompetent person
a dependent person
a baby
an abnormal person
a failure

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I'm very intelligent
that I need to help others
that I should not push myself too much
that I should not push myself too much outside my comfort zone
that I am good
that I look good

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I can't succeed
that I won't succeed
some insults
that I am not good enough
that I am weak
that I am a failure
that I should push myself
that I should push myself outside my comfort zone
that I am shy
that I should not be shy
that I don't care about others
that I only care about myself
that I am the most important thing in my life

Raphael · August 5, 2021

05/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

a smart person
a head in the cloud person
a good looking person
a good person
a helpful person
a baby

Father gave me a view of myself as...

an incompetent
a weak person
a dumb person
a dependent person
a useless person
a lazy person
an abnormal
a fragile person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I am smart
that I need others
that I am good looking
that I can help
that I am helpful
that I'm lost in my head

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I am weak
that I am incompetent
that I am dumb
that I'm fragile
that I'm incapable
that I'm lazy
that I'm shy
that I need to push myself harder
a lot of insults
that I'll never achieve anything in life
that I'll never succeed in life

Raphael · August 7, 2021

06/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

a good boy
a kid
a good looking guy
an intelligent person
a strange person
a head in the cloud person
an innocent person
a kind person
a good person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

a dumb person
an anxious person
a shy person
an incompetent person
an abnormal person
a dependent person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I am good enough
that I can do it
that I am smart
that I am good
some reassuring stuff
that I am exceptional

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

that I cannot do it
that I am stupid
that I shouldn't be how I am
that I need to push harder
that I need to make more efforts
that what I do is never enough
that I need to change
that I'm not enough
that I'm an idiot
that I can't change
that I'm incompetent
that I cannot succeed
that I should not listen to people

Raphael · August 8, 2021

07/08/2021 (Week 28)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

let go of negative aspects of my mother
let go of negative aspects of my dad
embrace the positive aspects of my mother
embrace the positive aspects of my dad
unite the kindness and supportive personality of my mom with the visceral strength of my dad
orient myself more and more towards positive self-talk

Raphael · August 9, 2021

08/08/2021 (Week 28)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

let go of negative self-talk from my father self
let go of negative self-talk from my mother self
embrace the qualities of my mother self
embrace the qualities of my father self
think more positively
support myself through my mother self
take ruthless actions through my father self

Raphael · August 9, 2021

09/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

I'll be more respectful of my mother
I'll mock my mother less
I'll bring more joy to the relationship with my mother
I'll become more connected to my mother
I'll know my mother better
I'll feel closer to my mother
I'll have more empathy for my mother

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

I'll try to talk to my father
I'll let go of fear of my father
I'll assert myself with my father
I'll get closer to my father
I'll understand my father better
I'll stop judging my father
I'll have more empathy for my father
I'll appreciate more my father
I'll see the good in my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

I know that they aren't good or bad
I know that they are doing everything that they can
I know that they love me
I understand that they suffer a lot
I understand that life is challenging for them
I become more aware of who they are

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship to my mother...

this level of awareness is quite low
I see that I don't make that much efforts to understand my mom
I see that my relationship can be improved
I can improve my awareness
I know that by improving my awareness I can improve my relationship a lot
I know that I need to pay more attention when she speaks

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

my awareness is very low
I notice that I have difficulties keeping my awareness high
I see that I need to do some efforts
I see that a lot of fear is preventing me to be aware
I understand that my father doesn't know me because I don't bring any awareness to our relationship
I know that I can make a lot of progress to increase the awareness of my relationship with my father

Raphael · August 10, 2021

10/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

I'll be more attentive to how I talk to my mom
I'll let go when some things annoy me
I'll politely say to my mom to stop when she speaks too much
my relationship with my mother would improve
I'll have a better emotional connection with my mom
my mom would appreciate me more
my relationship with my mom would improve

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

I'll try to talk with my dad
I'll be more open with my dad
I'll be less afraid of my dad
I'll accept my father more
I'll have more empathy for my father
I'll get a bit closer to my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

they are doing the best that they can
they aren't bad people
I can learn from them
I can see myself in them
I can learn about myself by learning from them
they are just human beings

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my mother...

this awareness is pretty low
this awareness isn't sufficient to maintain a high-quality relationship
I can improve this awareness
I need to let go of things
I see that I need to be more attentive when relating to my mother
I see that I hurt my mother many times because of the low awareness that I bring to the relationship

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

this awareness is very low
I know that I can make some progress with my dad
I see that I need to make some efforts
I see that I can unstuck myself
I see that fear is preventing me to be aware
I see that I need courage
I see that I can grow from healing the relationship with my father

Raphael · August 11, 2021

11/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

I'll be more respectful of my mother
I'll accept to help my mother
I'll put boundaries when my mother is asking too much from me
I'll let go of my annoyance when interacting with my mother
I'll have a healthier relationship with my mother
I'll have a deeper connection with my mother
I'll have more fun with my mother

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

I'll let go of the anger that I have towards my father
I'll understand that I am afraid of my father
I'll try to talk to my father
I'll stop judging my father
I'll have more empathy for my father
I'll be able to heal the traumas related to my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

I see that they aren't bad people
I see that they do the best that they can
I see that they love me
I see that they don't know me
I see that they have difficulties relating to me
I understand that the difficulties that they have relating to me are difficulties related to generational differences and different educations

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship to my mother...

this awareness is low
I see that I can bring more awareness to my relationship with my mother
I see that I'm afraid of sharing my vulnerabilities with my mom
I see that I can make a lot of progress to our relationship
this lack of awareness comes from my fear of being vulnerable
I need to be aware of my awareness

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

this awareness is very low
this awareness only focus on the negative aspects of my dad
this awareness dismiss the positive aspects of my dad
my fear of my father corrupts my awareness
my awareness is corrupted by my past traumas
this awareness can be improved
I see that my fear is irrational

Raphael · August 12, 2021

12/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

I'll be more conscious of how I speak to my mom
I won't take seriously my mom's jokes
I'll listen more to my mom
I'll accept my mom more
I'll give love to my mom
I'll be more vulnerable with my mom

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

I'll have more empathy for my dad
I'll try to understand my dad
I'll be more conscious of the difficulties of my dad
I'll understand that my father did the best that he could in his life
I'll forgive my father
I'll let go of resentment of my father
I'll try to talk to my dad

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

They aren't good nor bad, but just how they are
They do the best that they can with what they have
They are disconnected from me because they have different backgrounds and because they grew up at different times
They aren't that bad
They are good no matter what
I see that they care about me
I see that they love me
I see that they are doing the best that they can

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my mother...

this awareness is low
I see that I don't care enough about my mother
I see that I can improve this awareness
I see that by improving my awareness my relationship will improve
I see that by improving my awareness I'll become more connected to my mom
I'm choosing to improve my awareness

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

my awareness is very low
my awareness is clouded by fears
my awareness is low because I keep holding on to the past
I know I can improve my awareness
I know I need to focus more on the present moment while interacting with my father
I know I need to talk to my dad
I know that I can start by talking in front of him to start raising my confidence
I know that by talking to my father and healing our relationship my confidence will raise, my self-esteem will raise, and overall my personal development will skyrocket

Raphael · August 13, 2021

13/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

I'll be more conscious of how I speak with my mother
this relationship would improve
I'll be happier to interact with my mother
I'll bring more joy to the relationship with my mother
I'll feel more comfortable with my mother
I'll understand my mother more
I'll understand the difficulties of my mother more
I'll have a deeper connection with my mother

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

I'll try to become aware of the behaviors with my father
I'll understand the difficulties of my father more
I'll become more authentic around my father
I'll become more open with my father
I'll accept my father more
I'll have more empathy for my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

They aren't good or bad people but are just how they are
They are doing the best that they can
I can learn from them
They are good no matter their behavior
I see that they have difficulties in life
I see that they love me
I see that they are trying to do the best that they can

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my mother...

This awareness is low
This awareness can be improved
I know that I need to make some efforts to raise my awareness
my relationship can be improved by just raising my awareness a little
I'll be more authentic my improving my awareness
I'm choosing to improve my awareness

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

This awareness is very low
This awareness is so low because it is backed by fear
They are still traumas backing up my awareness
I can do some efforts to improve my awareness
my father knows that I dislike him
I know I can raise my awareness by loving my father more

Raphael · August 14, 2021

14/08/2021 (Week 29)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

recognize that my parents aren't good or bad
recognize that my parents are doing the best that they can
bring more awareness to the relationship that I have with my parents
bring more attention when I'm interacting with my parents
respect more my mom
respect more my dad
develop more empathy towards my mom
develop more empathy towards my dad
give love to my parents

Let's Get Practical #3: Raising Self-Esteem

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