Serious Shadow work

[Shunyata]

Hi. I'm looking for recomendations about serious shadow elimination, slaying the demons to get out of the fragile ego state in order to reach psychological adulthood. i'm going on this journey because I'm motivated by fear of death. It's not something like 'I want to find my bliss'.

My question is, is it all about staying and refusing to identify with an I-thought only?? To be fiercely united with the infinite mind, as shadowy fantasies pass by?

[okulele]

1 hour ago, Shunyata said:

My question is, is it all about staying and refusing to identify with an I-thought only?? To be fiercely united with the infinite mind, as shadowy fantasies pass by?

No. Enlightenment and shadow work are seperate. (you can see some of Ken Wilber's work, he explains it reasonably and Leo has some of his books in his list).

1 hour ago, Shunyata said:

to reach psychological adulthood

For that you must come into the body. To the very belly - literally. These are the lower centers that need to be taken care of. It's the physicality, humanness, pain and pleasure that you need to meet.

[tsuki]

2 hours ago, Shunyata said:

shadow elimination, slaying the demons

Start by getting over this attitude. The demons that you want to slay are parts of you that you reject.
They are not meant to be slain, they are meant to be loved and accepted for what they are and they need a place in the overall scheme of things. These parts only act this way because their intention is to get re-united with you.

See: δαίμων.

2 hours ago, Shunyata said:

to get out of the fragile ego state

The ego is a very overused word that means various things to different people.
In shadow work, what you really want is to expand your self-concept (ego) so that it can include the parts that it currently rejects.
There is a vast difference between a fragile ego that is unhealthy, a fragile ego that is healthy, and no ego. 

I would not make such absolute distinctions by saying that shadow work and enlightenment are separate.
It is easier to transcend a healthy ego.

Edited January 20, 2021 by tsuki

[Shunyata]

@tsuki You need to eliminate your shadowy projections. Maybe acceptance comes first, but it's not enough

[tsuki]

@Shunyata If you believe that what you know is enough, have it your way and see where it takes you.

[Shunyata]

@tsuki it was  part of the message of all the great artists and shamans. Just so you know it.

Edited January 20, 2021 by Shunyata

[nistake]

I completely agree with @tsuki here.

If you consider your shadow as your enemy who has to be eliminated, well, that's just more ego. You can fight as much as you want, but it's gonna be a never-ending struggle. A different (and a truly effective) approach would be showing total acceptance and even love to your shadowy parts.

[Rilles]

Dark Side Of The Light Chasers - Debbie Ford

buy it

do the exercises

the only book on Shadow Work I have ever needed.

Edited January 20, 2021 by Rilles

[Shunyata]

@Rilles thank you for suggestions

@nistake idk does it work?

[nistake]

@Shunyata It does. I've been working with my shadow seriously in the last few weeks and I can definitely see some progress. I learned the necessary techniques from the book Existential Kink by Carolyn Elliott.

[Shunyata]

@nistake thank you

[nistake]

@Shunyata You're welcome and good luck!

[Wisebaxter]

@Shunyata I'd say be cautious of going in with a 'slaying demons' attitude, as badass as that is. I'd been rocking a more 'integrating the darkness using unconditional love' approach.' Basically a Miyagi-Do thing instead of Cobra Kai. After all it's your inner child we're talking about here. It's just forgotten itself as the light and is scared. If you're going to go digging around there come baring gifts. Evil is only evil because it's seen through that lens as a projection. Thank everything that arises and compliment it. Ask it to stick around and always feel safe talking to you. A good practice is to meditate and bless everything that comes up for attention. A lot of that will be shadow related. This is the crux of David Rico's book 'Shadow Dance.' Self love is the only way. Matt Kahn is a great one to check out for shadow work. He says that micromanagement isn't the way. Keeping records of your judgements etc. The best way is to love them. Once love is your response to everything, you can't go far wrong. After all, everything is the divine, even the devil.

 

 

Edited January 20, 2021 by Wisebaxter

[peanutspathtotruth]

@Shunyata You have to find out for yourself but my sincere recommendation to you is taking the other replies to heart. Don't think  you have it all figured out. Yes, society and (most) art/media tells you slay the demon. In a sense that is true, but you don't slay with the force of violence but with the infinitely more powerful force of love. That's what many view as cheesy in art and they like the hero's journey more - but look at society itself. Does it look like most people have their shadow worked through? 

I hit my head against the wall with trying to kill dark parts of myself, even trying to shut down that ego itself. Futile. The moment I saw that this attitude is the problem and started truly loving all that is inside my psyche, without needing it to go away, everything changed. You asked a question, take inspiration from those who have found at least a hint of an answer. 

♥️

[Shunyata]

@peanutspathtotruth yeah, thanks for advice! 

[Shunyata]

@Wisebaxter 

@tsuki thank you for your suggestions!

[Samjc543]

If your goal is psychological adulthood, do not overlook working with a well-trained psychotherapist for a while. They are experts at pointing out your blind spots whilst also maintaining a supportive environment for working through and untangling deep psychological issues. Of course, do your research as to who may be a good fit for you, but even somebody that isn't fully focused on shadow work (although most will be familiar with it) will help understanding and working on emotional regressions back to childhood, attachment issues, trauma etc - all of which are crucial to psychological health and maturity. So even if you don't confront the shadow directly (which you probably will anyway), you will be building a much more stable psychological constitution which I believe is critical to doing shadow work effectively. You can also talk about the shadow work you're conducting independently with them. It's well worth the monetary investment.

A great quote from (I think) Gabor Mate went along the lines of "Deep psychological issues and traumas were initially formed through (faulty) relationships, and are best healed through relationship."

 

 

Edited January 20, 2021 by Samjc543

[Shunyata]

@peanutspathtotruth just wanted to say that obviously slaying demons is nothing but a metaphor LOL, for remaining fiercely as pure awareness and not identifying with I-thoughts with a gravitational pull to bring you back to your egoic sanskaras.

Edited January 20, 2021 by Shunyata

[Shunyata]

@Samjc543 this is very insightful, thanks! i'm just wondering, did you confront your shadow directly? 

[Shunyata]

7 minutes ago, Samjc543 said:

A great quote from (I think) Gabor Mate went along the lines of "Deep psychological issues and traumas were initially formed through (faulty) relationships, and are best healed through relationship."

this is makes so much sense because our guru told us that we(as egos) are formed by the judgements of others.

@Wisebaxter it's easier said than done