Girls... who have you felt understands you the best?

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Bruh at least take a girl on a couple dates and try to build some type of a relationship before going straight to having sex.

What I said does not contradict going on dates.

But there is no relationship until sex.

[Hardkill]

 

1 hour ago, soos_mite_ah said:

Bruh at least take a girl on a couple dates and try to build some type of a relationship before going straight to having sex. Hell for a lot of women, they want to be in a relationship first before even thinking about doing anything sexual. Men are like microwaves. They can heat up instantly. Women are like crock pots, it takes us some time. There isn't anything wrong with one night stands or sleeping with someone on the first date, but i guess my thing is have some patience. This isn't how a lot of scenarios work out. Often times you need to have some time for some type of emotional rapport to build with a woman. That doesn't mean you HAVE TO get into a committed relationship before having sex, but I guess I'm afraid of this type of message being taken to the extreme.

That's my whole thing with pick up. The messages there can easily be taken to the extreme if it isn't in the right context (at least from what I see) and that is especially the case with guys who spend all of their time behind a computer screen with little to no social skills period, forget about talking to the opposite sex. A lot of those guys don't know how to see nuances, because again, lack of social intelligence/ experience and that can get a lot of those people into trouble. And those extremes can easily paint women and female sexuality as a whole as some type of a caricature instead of viewing women as human with their own individual needs. I have talked to my friends about what we want in guys and almost after every conversation, regardless of what each of our individual preferences are, we realize that our bars are on the floor because ultimately we want a guy who will treat us with basic human respect (whether it is in a relationship or a hook up) so that we can trust the guy and feel safe.  

Go ahead, do whatever you want to attract women idk, just keep malicious intent out of it and view women as human instead of a body to add to your count. Ethical pick up if you will is necessary. And part of it is being careful of how things are phrased and not painting large groups of people with broad strokes. Seeing nuances and avoiding stereotypes is the best way to build any amount of social intelligence.  

I am not gonna lie, I wish I could take out Khloe Kardashian to dinner in order to bang her up her huge juicy sexy bubblebutt.

[Gesundheit]

I couldn't help but spill the truth that most women are not similar to those on this forum. Most women are not the thinker type. So, of course, anything women say here should be taken with a grain of salt, because they're a minority, and it only represents their limited pov from their limited archetype.

The truth is that most women are willing to have sex with a PUA from the very first date. Why? Because a successful PUA is what's actually attractive to most women.

Guys, don't listen to women's advice or perspective here. I mean listen, but don't prioritize it. Your priority should be to become a good PUA. That is what most women want. The rest is details that don't matter as much.

[Ryan R]

Generally speaking then, it seems dating and sexual encounters are drenched in fear. What I'm understanding here is that women on the dating scene are perpetually terrified they may be raped and possibly murdered by any random guy, while insecure men are deeply afraid of approaching and getting rejected by these same insecure women. That's all very unfortunate. No wonder I gave up mingling at bars and clubs, lol.

What I understand Leo to be saying is that "Pickup" is actually self improvement with an emphasis on developing one's social skills and cultivating masculine energy. In practice this then translates to being authenticly confident and attractive to women.

What I understand you ladies to be saying is that "real" quality long-term relationships, as opposed to mostly one night stands, are best approached slowly and even through months of a platonic interaction with a man before it blossoms into romantic love. Tell me true though, did these platonic friends of yours not peak your romantic interest when you first met them, even if things took months to happen?

I am deeply in touch with the masculine and feminine. It was always my dream to meet a woman who could be my beautiful friend first and, only slightly second, my lusty playful lover. This sort of relationship was my ideal even as a stupid horny teenager. Over the decades since then this line of thought and action has led to many girl friends, but few girlfriends. I don't discount or regret any of these relationships, but the pickup guys sure seem to have more "fun" and stand a far better chance of getting girlfriends, maybe even one to form a life-long partnership with.

In my life I was a romantic fool who passed up a lot of sex and possibly finding a wife because of heady notions of chivalry, honor, and virtue. It all worked out for the best I know, but my message to young men would be study and practice conscious pickup if you want to live a conventionally satisfying life.

Edited January 18, 2021 by Ryan R
Spelling, as usual.

[Abdelghafar]

11 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

What I said does not contradict going on dates.

But there is no relationship until sex.

@Leo Gura

The problem here, Leo, is that some people on this thread misinterpret what you're saying for being shallow and insensitive. when actually you're making a lot of sense. It's just that they need to get caught up with the entire big-picture perspective of why pickup exists, but obviously they still haven't grasped it yet. So, I think most of this thread is an endless cycle of misunderstandings arguments. Personally, I don't want to argue with anyone here.

Edited January 18, 2021 by Abdelghafar
Word Edit.

[lmfao]

2 hours ago, aurum said:

In other words, there's a lot of "force" that goes on in pickup. Guys trying to force themselves to approach. Guys trying to force themselves to be attractive. Forcing everything.

The question of forcing or not is a repetitive theme of self growth. Sometimes phrased as " accept yourself vs improve yourself". 

I find a lot of truth in saying something like "If you don't do something other than what you typically do, you won't get anything besides what typically befalls you". That's my level or place of truth from the life I've led, people and experiences I've seen. 

'Forcing' is tied to motivation. Ime, there are good and bad ways of forcing.

 

Some "bad ways" will involve feeding negative fantasies for fuel. Also, if you lack attention to the present and are too caught in the fantasy you will be straining your mind neurotically, inefficient and lose energy. (What grounds this for me are vivid experiences of exercising with different mindsets) 

The "good way" of forcing on the other hand is outrageously simple, but it takes unlearning false. Even then, it might not be perfect or you want something more. 

--

Something which is true about forcing, which has also been a theme in the above messages, is about practicality and workable solutions. A matter of asking "what can be done?".

People here are describing Pickup as the practical and workable thing. 

 

But perhaps I'm doing a disservice by saying "practical and workable solution" rather than just "solution", for in the prior case I'm attached to an idealism of sorts. [I'm talking about more than just pick up, not excluding though] An energy of dissatisfaction where I think "If only it was like this", "It should be ___", "survival and evolutionary forces are a bitch", etc 

Edited January 18, 2021 by lmfao

[Jasmine Voit]

My childhood female friends “understand” me most and we can relate on many levels. However, my fiancé and I seem to understand one another more each day. Try to patient. I am doubtful that you can understand every female with “resources”. Communication and time is probably the key to understanding any individual better. Also accept that you can never understand everything because neither of you have the same upbringing or experiences. But you can do the most with what you have

Edited January 18, 2021 by Jasmine Voit

[soos_mite_ah]

14 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

What I said does not contradict going on dates.

But there is no relationship until sex.

what if the woman in question isnt looking to have sex before getting into a relationship?

[Hardkill]

2 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

what if the woman in question isnt looking to have sex before getting into a relationship?

I think that actually doesn't usually work because by doing that you won't be able to find out how sexually compatible you are with that person until you have sex with them.

Btw, check out my last reply I sent to you at the bottom of the page just before this one

[Leo Gura]

9 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

what if the woman in question isnt looking to have sex before getting into a relationship?

Lolz

[ColeMC01]

@Leo Gura I do not agree with the way you say it. You say it as an absolute fact and from my experience it is not like that. It will heavily depend on where the girl is from, how old is she, how conservative she is, what religion she has and how religious she is in general and what limiting beliefs and demonetization she may put to sex. I know A LOT of girls around 18-20 that got in relationships before having sex. I also know girls that had sex before relationships so honestly it kinda depends.

On Las Vegas where you live and most girls being over 22 then that is a lot more the case. American girls are quite liberal in general. But your audience here is quite international and they have different ages so saying it as an absolute fact, i don't agree with that. You cannot start a relationship before sex with American liberal girls over 22 would be more accurate. I know from your experience it has been like that but you live in a specific part of the world and interact with a specific range of girls. I don't think you were having one night stands with 18 year old conservative girls from Vegas clubs.

Good luck having sex with an 18 year old conservative girl before getting in relationship with her.

 

[Abdelghafar]

Leo is having fun. 

[Preety_India]

27 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

what if the woman in question isnt looking to have sex before getting into a relationship?

In that case the relationship hasn't begun. 

But I understand what you're trying to get at. 

You're saying that you wanna date the guy, get to know him before you are in his bed. 

And that's perfectly normal.

Women don't simply go around having sex. 

Don't let the guys on the forum fool you. No woman does that, trust me. 

Any woman who does that is a perfect fool 

There is no free sex in this world. 

 

They need to know if the guy is safe or not. They have to do their checklist. 

Real women aren't looser than a baby tooth. 

That's why these pickup men flock clubs to find club sluts to sleep with because they are loose 

With real women, these men are going to have a much harder time. 

Just think for a minute. If these women slept with one man who looks attractive, then they get approached every week, are they gonna sleep with a different dude every week??? 

If they did that, they will end up with all sorts of STDs 

 

A lot of the numbers these guys make up are fake numbers or just club sluts. The type who would bed over a drink or Coke. 

Just dont listen to all this bullshit. 

You're a high quality woman. 

High quality woman wait for a nice guy to come along and only offer sex when they know he is the man they want.

 

No dignified woman simply goes around spreading her legs to all sorts of men she finds attractive just because she thinks he is a good guy. 

Don't listen to this western bullshit. Half of what you read is bollocks and not true at all. 

I speak to western women everyday. 

And no dignified western woman simply sleeps with a man.. 

Don't let Pick up men fool you into believing that that's the norm. 

There is a reason why all these dudes having such a hard time getting laid. 

Because no woman wants to simply sleep with them for nothing. 

A woman wants a solid relationship that these men just cannot provide and they come heckling here. 

 

 

Edited January 18, 2021 by Preety_India

[Abdelghafar]

29 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

what if the woman in question isnt looking to have sex before getting into a relationship?

2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

In that case the relationship hasn't begun. 

Well said.

 

 

[soos_mite_ah]

3 minutes ago, ColeMC01 said:

@Leo Gura I do not agree with the way you say it. You say it as an absolute fact and from my experience it is not like that. It will heavily depend on where the girl is from, how old is she, how conservative she is, what religion she has and how religious she is in general and what limiting beliefs and demonetization she may put to sex. I know A LOT of girls around 18-20 that got in relationships before having sex. I also know girls that had sex before relationships so honestly it kinda depends.

I agree with this. Plus I want to add that there are reasons why a woman would want to wait that doesn't have to do with being religious, being conservative, having limiting beliefs, or any demonization of sex. Some want to have a clear mind by keeping sex off the table when it comes to dating and don't want to muddy her judgement of a guy's character. Some know that they are the type of people who gets emotionally attached to a guy when they have sex so they put that off until they enter a committed relationship so they can save themselves heart ache and save the guy drama from dealing with a girl who got attached too quickly. And some women need a good deal of trust in a guy before fully revealing themselves to him because it can be hella daunting to be butt ass naked with a guy.

I wouldn't be surprised if age is a factor. I'm speaking as a 21 year old (lets be real there is some bias on my part and I can recognize that) and I know a lot of women at my age who don't have much experience with dating and sex. As a result, they don't want to sleep with a guy too early and they want to feel things out before jumping into something too fast. In those situations, some girls aren't comfortable with going from 0-100 that fast and it's ok. 

Again, every woman will very. Some women aren't like what I'm talking about at all and some are. To each their own. And if a girl that waits that long is a deal breaker because sexual compatibility and experience is that important to you in a relationship, that's perfectly ok too. I'm just saying that there are a lot of women who might not be comfortable with how fast guys want them to have sex with them and it's a very real concern that a lot of women have. 

[Preety_India]

Just now, Abdelghafar said:

Well said.

 

 

What she meant is that she doesn't prefer to have sex right away. 

She wants an emotional kinda relationship before the sexual relationship begins. 

And that's perfectly fine. She just wants a feeling of safety and connection with the guy. 

A lot of women feel insecure when deciding to sleep with a man. 

Women tend to loosen up if they feel a sense of emotional connection with a man and that's when they also open up sexually as well 

 

 

[Abdelghafar]

6 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

What she meant is that she doesn't prefer to have sex right away. 

She wants an emotional kinda relationship before the sexual relationship begins. 

And that's perfectly fine. She just wants a feeling of safety and connection with the guy. 

A lot of women feel insecure when deciding to sleep with a man. 

Women tend to loosen up if they feel a sense of emotional connection with a man and that's when they also open up sexually as well 

 

 

I agree with you on the fact that you have to screen the potential romantic counterpart first to feel if their "vibe" jibes with yours before going forward. I get it @Preety_India.

Edited January 18, 2021 by Abdelghafar
Word Edit.

[soos_mite_ah]

6 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

In that case the relationship hasn't begun. 

But I understand what you're trying to get at. 

You're saying that you wanna date the guy, get to know him before you are in his bed. 

And that's perfectly normal.

Women don't simply go around having sex. 

Don't let the guys on the forum fool you. No woman does that, trust me. 

Any woman who does that is a perfect fool 

There is no free sex in this world. 

 

They need to know if the guy is safe or not. They have to do their checklist. 

Real women aren't looser than a baby tooth. 

That's why these pickup men flock clubs to find club sluts to sleep with because they are loose 

With real women, these men are going to have a much harder time. 

Just think for a minute. If these women slept with one man who looks attractive, then they get approached every week, are they gonna sleep with a different dude every week??? 

If they did that, they will end up with all sorts of STDs 

 

A lot of the numbers these guys make up are fake numbers or just club sluts. The type who would bed over a drink or Coke. 

Just dont listen to all this bullshit. 

You're a high quality woman. 

High quality woman wait for a nice guy to come along and only offer sex when they know he is the man they want.

 

No dignified woman simply goes around spreading her legs to all sorts of men she finds attractive just because she thinks he is a good guy. 

Don't listen to this western bullshit. Half of what you read is bollocks and not true at all. 

I speak to western women everyday. 

And no dignified western woman simply sleeps with a man.. 

Don't let Pick up men fool you into believing that that's the norm. 

There is a reason why all these dudes having such a hard time getting laid. 

Because no woman wants to simply sleep with them for nothing. 

A woman wants a solid relationship that these men just cannot provide and they come heckling here. 

I agree with this a lot but I would also like to add some things to it as well. There isn't anything wrong with sleeping around as a woman if that's what she chooses to do. She isn't loose, a club slut, or any less dignified or low quality because of that. Context matters a lot and even women who don't typically sleep around might be more in the mood to have a one night stand or two if she was at a club. Even then, if a woman sleeps around a lot, most of the time she still has standards  in regards to how she is treated and approached and she still is looking for some type of emotional connection even if it is for a short term basis like a hook up or a friends with benefits. But yeah, I feel like PUAs often have a caricature of women in their minds that is far from what an actual woman is like. That I still stand by. 

[Preety_India]

3 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

I agree with this a lot but I would also like to add some things to it as well. There isn't anything wrong with sleeping around as a woman if that's what she chooses to do. She isn't loose, a club slut, or any less dignified or low quality because of that. Context matters a lot and even women who don't typically sleep around might be more in the mood to have a one night stand or two if she was at a club. Even then, if a woman sleeps around a lot, most of the time she still has standards  in regards to how she is treated and approached and she still is looking for some type of emotional connection even if it is for a short term basis like a hook up or a friends with benefits. But yeah, I feel like PUAs often have a caricature of women in their minds that is far from what an actual woman is like. That I still stand by. 

Well there is nothing wrong with having standards either. 

If I think that I don't want to sleep with a man who has slept with a 100 women, I can't be blamed, it's my standard and my preference. 

To each his own. 

I have high standards though. Which means I got boundaries who I'm going to be sleeping with 

 

[Leo Gura]

23 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

And no dignified western woman simply sleeps with a man

Ahahahahaha....