How can I enjoy life again? Everything feels pointless

[Dodo]

@deso it all belongs to the other side anyway.

Here's a simple and most powerful meditation for you that you can do at anytime standing or sitting. 

Give away your entire experience - all thoughts, feelings and sense perceptions. Imagine that you're pushing them back to where they came from. Relax your attention to objects and give them all away to consciousness - the empty space which holds them and where they came from. Keep attention bathing in this space of consciousness,  that will purify your mind and you will become enlightened- easy and simple.  only practice is between you and bliss

 

[karkaore]

8 hours ago, deso said:

For a long time I thought enlightenment would be the only thing that I wanted. Especially since this awakening that I had. Nothing made sense anymore. I foolishly tried to glue together the glass that just got shattered.

I failed miserably in bringing life to that which I‘ve seen. I‘ve neglected what my heart was yelling beneath mist of futility. I continued entertaining my head while not making a move towards what felt good/right. I tried to understand shit well off my current stage of development without even getting the fundamentals right. And if some of those fundamentals of life aren’t in order enlightenment simply isn’t possible.

I get all that. But I don’t get how to get out of this state that I’m in. Because no matter what I do I feel horrible. I’m not interested in anything anymore. I feel the urge to do something, but nothing excites me, nothing really resonates or gives me the feeling of ‘yeah, I would really like to do that’. I tried out a lot of stuff, but everything is just draining the life out of me even more.

Stupid question, but how can I build the life of my dreams if there’s literally no resonance at all?

I feel you bro. Nothing excites, nothing motivates, nothing does anything in that place. It took me about a year to even begin recovering from that. What happened to me was I ran out of money quite quickly and ended up living with my grandmother at first, now am living with my mom.  But that's not the point, the point is that when I got in a situation like this I noticed many, many things in which I can help my grandmother, help my mom. Helping even with small things brought me joy. Seeing that genuine smile on their face.. Oh man.  That gave me a sense of purpose and direction.

It all comes down to sympathy, compassion and love. You do love your relatives, your friends, right? Try doing something nice for them, something genuine and kind. See how they react, see how you feel afterwards. This might reignite the fire, at least give it a spark.

You can help yourself by helping others, by helping others you will help yourself.

Edited January 13, 2021 by karkaore

[Shunyata]

every ego feels this way, everyone just wants to die, heck why don't you just go and kill yourself? You should fight these voices and know that they are not real, damnit, you're supposed to be so productive now.

[tsuki]

On 11.01.2021 at 10:43 PM, deso said:

I did a lot of spiritual work over the past couple of years. Two years ago I had a little awakening that turned things upside down a bit. Everything became empty and meaningless ever since then. All the interests that I had just dropped away in the blink of an eye. I had to go vegan, stay away from sugar and alcohol, because my body rejects it ever since then (like literally). Plainly, it changed a bunch of things and I sense the tricks and flicks of the ego all the time. It feels like I‘ve seen through the illusion, but am still operating from there even though I know it‘s bs.

I've been there.

There are things constructed by the ego that fall away during awakenings, and there is you that is spontaneous and ingenious. 
What you had is the awakening of the mind, but there is also the awakening of the heart and the awakening of the body.

Keep chipping away at it. There is a real you underneath all of the deception that is not merely a conditioned mental construct. The true purpose of the mind is to learn from that real you and express it via language. The trick is that your true nature cannot be fully grasped and "known" like the untamed mind would like it to have. This is how the ego is being constructed moment-to-moment, by confusing conceptual self with the real self. Feelings are the key to finding yourself.

Good luck!

Edited January 13, 2021 by tsuki

[Vittorio]

Find your life vision and the reasons why behind each category of your life. This will help you give a meaning to life and a cause to fight for.

Edited January 13, 2021 by Vittorio

[Moksha]

13 hours ago, deso said:

@Moksha but how do I continue? How do I gain enjoyment in ‘relative reality’ again? Because right now no matter what I do I feel like running on the spot. It’s exhausting as hell.

That sense of hopelessness and futility is a classic judo move by the ego. ? It is the conditioned mind telling you that there is no purpose or joy in anything. The best lies have a kernel of truth. In a relative sense, your conditioned mind is right. Everything that is created, including you, is transient. Everything dies.

So realize the part of You that isn't created, and doesn't die. When you directly realize Yourself as Consciousness, you will discover love, and that discovery will inform how you live for the rest of your "relative" life.

What is the path to realizing this? Meditation, study, service, personal growth, healthy relationships, and constructive living. It would be nice if the path  was easier, but then again if it was easy, everyone would already be enlightened.

[Bodhitree]

The only way forward is through, I believe. I’ve had a brush with this, and it has resolved itself with some years of Buddhist study. 

[Guest Edvardas]

@Moksha Thank you for clarifying such points. I had a realization a week ago and a few of your posts really guided me in the right direction. Cheers! 

[Moksha]

22 minutes ago, Edvardas said:

@Moksha Thank you for clarifying such points. I had a realization a week ago and a few of your posts really guided me in the right direction. Cheers! 

@Edvardas Great to hear bro, and thank you for the kind words ?