Something casual

[Gesundheit2]

Life is so complex, yet so simple. But only if you're awake. Otherwise, it doesn't matter what you think, cuz you don't really understand life either way.

[Gesundheit2]

Apparently, my mind got exposed by a dude called Eisenhower.

Wait, maybe we live in different realities.

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

And if I was given the choice a billion times, I would still choose this life. It's just amazing! 

[Gesundheit2]

Great. And now my brother is suicidal.

He has been thinking about suicide for over a year now. But every time he talks to me about it, it seems to be getting more serious in his mind than before. I don't know what to tell him. I try to comfort and take an understanding approach. It does not work well most of the times. The only thing that seems to be working is when I paint him a picture of a better future, where his problems might be solved and life is a little bit easier.

Most recently, he told me some specific ideas about what he would want to happen after he commits suicide. He's looking for a way to make his body completely disappear so that nobody would have to deal with burial and that kind of stuff. He said he would also leave a note on what to do with his personal stuff. These are not good signs. He is not joking around. He's in great pain, and I know it. We live in the same room. We're basically together 24/7.

I really don't know what to do in such situations. It seems impossible for me to talk any sense into him. Sometimes I tell him that my life is way more miserable than his, and that despite that I don't think about killing myself. I'm alluding to the possibility of ego death that I want him to see, but unfortunately he's unable to. He dismisses all of spirituality as hippy nonsense. Medication is not a solution for him either. He doesn't want to take anything, even for his OCD, which is milder but seems to be contributing to the overall problem.

I don't particularly feel attached to him at this point. I have already accepted the fact that he might actually do it someday. If he kills himself, well then. But I still have a bias, and prefer if he stays alive.

 

[Gesundheit2]

Even though I've never drunk alcohol or anything like that -- let alone actually getting drunk -- but the level of sobriety that I'm experiencing currently almost render my entire life prior to this point drunk, and at some points even hungover. It just feels that way right now. I don't want to feel any other way anymore 

Edited July 26, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

@Loba Been following the recent updates, and I gotta say it takes a lot of courage to be putting yourself out there like that with full transparency and that much detail. I hardly open up myself, and when I do, often it feels awful or at best challenging. But then there's the peace that comes afterwards that ultimately makes it worth it.

Personally, I've always liked reading childhood stories, and yours are no exception. It seems that reading childhood stories somehow help me understand myself better, as almost nobody talks about these sensitive, private materials, and even I rarely contemplate my past to begin with. I guess when I read the stories of others I feel some sense of familiarity with their struggles that can be very comforting. And also at the same time, I get to learn the differences between me and them, and how & why my life turned out to be the way it is.

I like this forum because most people here don't pass on much judgements on private personal matters, and if they do, they're often positive and encouraging. Hope you're doing fine and that everything is okay over there. Looking forward to hearing back from you. Take care!

Edited July 27, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

Everything in life has pros and cons. There are trade-offs with everything. Nothing ever is absolutely good, or bad. Every detail has pros and cons, too. It's bottomless.

That said, a good litmus test to know whether you love or hate something would be to look at how positively or negatively you think about it. Love conceals the bad, it makes the ugly look beautiful. So, the deeper you are in that pit of love with something/someone, the more you will overlook their shortcomings, and you will even love the cons about that particular thing/person, depending on how deep you're gone in. At the most extreme levels, you will call it God and worship it. And vice-versa with hatred, only you will call it the devil and fight against it.

If you were perfectly neutral, you would not have a preference, and you would not feel an emotion. But you're not, nobody is. Because, perfect neutrality = death. But still, a certain level of neutrality is probably achievable with most things, which already don't matter much to begin with. In other words, you don't have to stop having preferences altogether, simply pick the preferences that matter and discard the ones that don't. For example, life is a preference that you have and should accept and embody instead of deny and repress. On the other hand, the color green, for example, is a preference that you can do without easily. Well, unless you're hippy 

 

Edited July 29, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

The difference between me and first world imposters who call themselves spiritually enlightened is that they only have book-knowledge of enlightenment. I have that, and I also have street knowledge, which is the more important one. It's the same difference between actually being enlightened and thinking that you are. I'm sorry. First world enlightenment is very weak, it's not even real in almost any sense of the word.

And I'm not talking about theoretical enlightenment here, so they're not imposters in that sense. I'm talking about those who have experience, but one that's just without enough depth to be considered real. They're just a bunch of noobs who think they're world-class due to lack of depth/experience.

 

Edited July 29, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

If you examine the current economics and politics in the world, you will discover very quickly that they both are very simple even though they might seem complex on the surface. There are a few key principles that rule the two domains, and the rest is noise. Culture feeds the noise. It distracts from what's really going on.

Anyway, that's not the main insight here. The main insight is that the lack of complexity is an indicator on how primitive these systems are. In other words, it does not take a genius to create such systems. And in fact, what actually happened is that they were created on the fly as humanity (mainly & exclusively first-world countries) was evolving. The collective subconscious creates these systems unconsciously as they are necessities. The same thing is happening now with the development of digital currency. An idea popped up, and was followed by an invention. Yet, no one is calling the shots, rather everyone is just reacting.

However, the current systems are a little bit more complex than they were, say, a millennium ago. Yet, they're still very simple and primitive compared to other sciences, or how complex they can and should be. Of course, these systems are a bit more advanced in developed countries than the rest of the world, but the point still stands that they are still primitive nonetheless. And there's a reason for that, it's because the people at the top of these hierarchies are not the brightest people, rather often just the most selfish ones (believe it or not, they just happen to be there by luck). So, as long as the system is working, do not touch it. In fact, if you touch it, I will put you in jail and maybe even execute you. These people mostly manipulate the system with the traditional methods, and rarely in more creative ways, e.g. Nixon's shift from gold to USD.

People at the top of these hierarchies (down to the middle) have no interest in developing the system, as that goes against their agendas. And people lower than that have no understanding of the system to begin with. It's top-half against bottom-half, and they're both playing for the favor of the top-half. Even if some people (like myself) somehow manage to get the understanding and see through the bullshit, they will still not have the power or influence. Plus, they will be demonized, because the majority of people will pledge their loyalty to the current power structure, and not to a potentially better, more equal one. Cuz it's working. "Let me live today, and fuck you and your vision of tomorrow".

 

Edited July 29, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

1 hour ago, ThePoint said:

Man I kind of felt a little wave of sadness while reading this. I keep having negative thoughts but it feels uncontrollable.

It's like there is a beast in my mind that constantly wants to be fed with anxiety. When there is nothing to be anxious about, it will be anxious about not having anything to be anxious about.

Sounds crazy and irrational right? I know... but it feels so uncontrollable. I want it to leave me alone and just let me live my life.

@Gesundheit2 How do you stop having negative thoughts?

@ThePoint

I'm sorry that you're experiencing that. I have been there for a very long time, and I've gotten over it almost completely by now. I think this particular issue is especially common among young people in our modern era, for societal reasons. However, please cheer up and have faith. There is a solution to every problem. Many people have gone through this and come out to the other end in good shape.

My advice would be to first recognize a very important distinction here, and to really connect to one of the most genuine and authentic desires that living beings have but humans seem to forget easily, which is the desire to feel good. There is a rational decision that needs to be made first before going to the next steps. The decision is that you want to feel good no matter the circumstances. Do you not agree? If you do, then make the conscious decision and commitment to yourself that you want to feel good under all circumstances. And when you do, don't shoot low, rather aim for the stars. Unconditional happiness, and nothing short of that. Make that your goal, and you will reach it eventually. Every morning, think about the benefits that you will get from becoming a positive person. Contemplate this: Why would I settle for negative thoughts when I know the enormous benefits of thinking positively? It's clear that you know the answer intellectually, but do you feel it on a cellular level? That's the question, and the ultimate goal.

Second of all, please make sure that you are getting enough rest and sleep, that you're always hydrated enough, that you eat healthy foods, and that you just take good care of your body in general. The body is limited and it needs constant care to function optimally. The brain might be more resilient, and overall more flexible, but at the end of the day it's still also limited and requires rest, so always make sure to get the basic needs met before worrying about other stuff.

Now, to the meat of the topic, which is: How to stop feeling bad in general?

Well, in my experience, there is a distinction between feeling bad and thinking negative thoughts. It was not very clear at first, but as I started inquiring into it, it gradually became apparent, and now it's clear as day. They're kind of the same thing, but not really. I mean there is a connection between them, and one affects the other. Oftentimes, when people say they are feeling sad, they're usually mixing the two phenomenon by implying that the feeling of sadness is actually bad. It's subtle how it works, but most people fear the feeling of sadness. We're programmed from birth to run away from feeling into it, and to distract ourselves with stimulants of all kinds. And that's the problem, because the raw feeling itself is not necessarily bad, but our thoughts make it to be. Oftentimes, the feeling of sadness is an indicator for me that reality is not going the way I want it to go. At times, it might be because of my high expectations, and other times something else. The underlying fact is that I have thoughts about how reality should be, but then if reality turns out to be a different way, then my internal alarms will go, and I will feel fearful and all that. But what's really at stake there? Is there something real at stake? Or simply just the expectations/thoughts? For example, let's say I was fired from my job that I work really hard to get and maintain. The average joe would feel terrible. Their thoughts would be racing in anger or sadness (sometimes both) about how and why this should not be the case. They would waste their time and energy worrying about what they think will be the consequences of that event, even thought that might not be the case at all. Instead, what they could have done was to simply accept and move on looking for another job. Oftentimes, it's not all what the mind makes it to be. And reality is often really not that bad, except maybe in our minds. The mind is a story-teller, and one of its functions is to exaggerate. It's okay to let go of control sometimes. Not everything has to go according to plan, and that's assuming the plan we have in mind is perfect, which rarely is the case.

To give a quick tip-list:

1. Recognize the distinction between thoughts and emotions.
2. Watch your thoughts more closely. Ideally, start a meditation habit if you don't have it installed already.
3. Allow yourself to feel the emotions as deeply as you can. Start thinking of emotions as signals that are offering you information about the world (and mostly yourself), they do not represent the world itself even thought that might seem to be the case.
4. Do not focus very much on removing the negative thoughts. What you resist persists. Instead, apply the basic principle of the Law of Attraction. Focus on what you want, not what you don't want. You will attract more positivity in your life by actually applying positivity, not by fighting negativity.
5. At the same time, be realistic and don't fall into naïve positivity. Try to keep the balance as much as you can. But it's okay to let yourself be naïve sometimes. Don't beat yourself over it if it happens.
6. Surround yourself with positive people and positive content. Avoid toxic people and content.
7. Treat this as a long-term project that might have ups and downs along the way. Your only job is to make sure that overall it's going up and not down.
8. Baby-step your progress. Slow and steady wins the race.
9. Make sure to blow off some steam and let things out of your system every once in a while. Go on vacations and special events. Treat yourself kindly.
10. Write down all your thoughts in a journal. Try to be as specific as possible about how you are feeling and what you are thinking in the moment.

Hope this was helpful. I'm sorry if I wrote somethings in a hectic way, I'm not a native speaker, but I try my best. Let me know if you have any thoughts or questions. I'll be more than happy to offer my thoughts. Good luck! ?

Edited July 29, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

I believe that at this point, there is not a mistake in the world that I have not yet committed. I have done something of everything, at the very least. Leo will soon publish a video on the biggest traps within self-help and spirituality. I'm already sure I've fallen into most of what he's going to say, even though self-help and spirituality are only a part of my life/path. I have made mistakes in all other areas as well. And I've learned so much. I've learned the easy way, as well as the hard way, school of hard knocks. My parents gave me an outdated map. I've created a new, more modern, and more accurate one. From scratch, and from personal experience, without a teacher or a mentor. Suffering is the greatest teacher, and bliss is suffering's sugar wife that I've fucked so ruthlessly, so relentlessly. I've cucked the hell out of suffering. And now, we're even. Naturally, I should be the prince of this world, it's in my DNA. But it looks like God has other plans. We'll see who's going to win in the end, and how many of his angels I will fuck, too.

Edited July 30, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

Spiritual Dick.

Man, I just love the internet!

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

 

 

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

"Desire is a mosquito that will never quit or let you live peacefully until you smash it." -- The legendary Ges.

Edited August 6, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

 

 

[Gesundheit2]

Non-duality is a very useful philosophy. It makes life play. The Buddha said life is suffering. He did not realize that suffering is only half of the duality. There's happiness on the other half. And the best thing is that the halfs are not fixed. You can literally expand one and shrink the other if you want. In fact, most people do that unconsciously. They expand on their suffering and shrink their happiness. Sounds stupid, right? Well, humans are stupid.

The truth is that you do have a choice, but first you need to achieve a certain level of transcendence/selflessness before you may access that much control over the dualities of life. The more transcendent/selfless you become, the easier this gets. Imagine going to work and feeling like you're playing instead of working. That's literally the kind of thing you can do with non-duality. You can dissolve the duality between work and play if you want, and then you can re-create it in the way that you want. It's all in your mind. Psychology.

Edited August 6, 2022 by Gesundheit2