Something casual

[Gesundheit2]

I'm starting to think that what people call a religious experience or God experience or direct consciousness, etc... is actually my baseline state of consciousness. No one I know in real life talks about any of the stuff here from experience. All of them parrot religious wisdom without comprehending basically anything, because they're mostly materialists and wear the religious mask due to conformity/out of peer pressure. I always found trouble relating to others, now I'm thinking that's because we're not on the same frequency to begin with, hence I still manage to relate eventually with some effort. The people on here and on other substance-induced awakenings sites create a lot of drama around God and view it as a weird/rare artifact, which indicates that they don't experience it long or deeply enough, or that they're full of ego and the contrast brings them to their knees. I can't be fully sure until I try the drugs first, but boy does it seem like what they consider God is just the mundane to me. I wonder if that is actually the case, and if it is then what would a drug do? For me to actually be efficient in the materialist world, I put lots of efforts, which seems effortless for almost everyone else. Sometimes I struggle to think a sentence. Sometimes I wonder how people can go on and on and ramble about anything basically non-stop when I can't speak about anything from memory. Almost every time I talk or respond to someone whether online or in real life, I find myself automatically tapping into the words themselves in the moment without much tapping into memory. In other words, I rarely rely on memory or the subconscious mind to think or interact with people, rather I mostly talk from the now. I actually used to have more trouble in the past couple of years when I was fully dedicated to spiritual practice, right now I'm not at that frequency and life feels somewhat easier, albeit being less happier.

[Gesundheit2]

I used to have low IQ and EQ, but I used to (unconsciously) think a lot (not the same as overthinking) in order to make up for the low IQ, and somewhat the low EQ. In social interactions, my physical appearance (clothes, style, hygiene, glasses, elegant watch, etc...) used to do much of the work for me. People always assumed that I'm top tier and gave me leeway and special treatment without me actually saying or doing anything special, well except being successful in school which I don't consider an indicator of intelligence; people apparently think differently. Some people could see through me and treated me as I deserved which I found cruel or cold at the time but now I find fair and logical. I always lacked confidence and charisma, which is why I didn't have a lot of success with the opposite sex or with my former job as a sales representative. As for confidence, I used to do religious affirmations and they worked like magic. But charisma has always been a bitch with me. It's hard. You can't make a John Cena into The Rock. The gap is so big and obvious. Cena doesn't have charisma. The Rock has it. How and why? Nobody knows. I'm John Cena; boring, flat, unemotional, I even joke with monotonality, etc... So, in order to fit in with the expectation that I'm top tier, I used to counter the lack of charisma by acting like a hypermaniac with verbal diarrhea. Luckily, I didn't do that for long, because I actually got burned out quickly, but jeez looking back now I definitely was disgusting I would kill myself. Right now, I still don't have the charisma that I want but at least I'm comfortable with myself, which allows me to act somewhat charismatic and it seems authentic when I do so.

But back to the original IQ topic, right now my IQ levels are average or slightly above average according to the test. However, in a way I feel dumber because I don't think as much as I used to, sometimes I doubt my ability to think. But when I think even for a little, I'm smarter than many people. As for my EQ, I can now read other people's energy and emotions very easily and with very good accuracy probably because I can read myself, but I'm still working on how to respond correctly in a way that not only promises a win-win scenario but actually guarantees and secures it. In theory, my EQ is very high, but in practice it's still below average. It sucks, but it will change with more practice and awareness.

Edited March 18, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[zurew]

4 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

I should have known that already since I'm on the way to becoming a web developer

Good luck with that!

Do you want to be a frontend developer or a backend one or a full stack? Do you want to get into that field because of money or you are just interested in it?

One skill that is going to be essential down the road is a good googling skill and the ability to being able to read documentation. If you can google for the right questions and if you save some sites that can help you to find answers for your bug problems it can save a lot of time.

There is this thing called google-dorking. You can use google dorks to get much more specific results for whatever you want to search.

For example:

• if you use site:actualized.org intext:love  ---> google will only give you pages that are on actualized.org and all those sites will have the word love at least once in them.

But basically a good rule of thumb is that whatever coding problem you will have down the road the chances are that someone already solved it or encountered with it, is very high. So if you don't have a lot of time to struggle or grapple with a problem, you can search for it.

Firstly recognise the problem well and then articulate it in a google search way.(Of course there are some cases, where you need to use google just to recognise what errors or problems you have that is also powerful)

One other helpful thing to solve coding problems better, could be using different kind of coding forums and asking your questions there.

 

Edited March 18, 2022 by zurew

[Gesundheit2]

@zurew Thanks, man. Appreciate the tips. Are you a developer yourself?

I started out my journey from the Front-End end, but I might as well go full-stack eventually since the paths seem similar and cross over each other all the time. I chose the front-end path for a variety of reasons;

1. The low-end hardware that is required.
2. The high income that is promised.
3. The low mental demand, which turned out to be a bit illusory, but still relatively low compared to other programming careers.
4. The former experience I have in design.
5. The luck factor. I happened to watch an HTML and CSS crash course by accident, and I thought why not go all the way?

To be honest, I don't prefer this kind of job for itself. I prefer more physically demanding jobs, I think they're more healthy, but most of them are frowned upon and don't pay well. But I don't hate it either. The only one obstacle that I'm struggling with right now is problem solving. And I'm not struggling simply because it's hard for me, rather because I don't have a high IQ. I mean, I can understand the problem and the solution when the instructor is explaining it, it's no problem whatsoever. But to replicate the solution on my own, it takes time and effort, which is probably the case for most developers. I still haven't gotten over the learning curve, but I've only gotten into problem solving like 6 months ago. Overall, I've been on this path for a year. In two days the year will be complete.

Edited March 19, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[zurew]

7 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

Are you a developer yourself?

Not yet, but trying to get there. I am studying Software engineering at my university right now, mostly to get the degree to be able to get jobs easier down the road. I know its not necessarily essential nowadays, but still there are places which requires a certain level of degree,depending on the positions one wants to take.

Right now i am really interested in NLP (Natural Language Processing). Its became a hobby of mine to study it in my free time. Its interesting, a lot of cool stuff can be built with it if one understand it well ( I am far from understanding it deeply ). I have to study it a lot more because there is a lot of information and knowledge that can be collected there just as with almost any field.

There are some good projects that can be bulilt using machine learning and NLP and some other tools. For example imagine, if you could build an AI that can recognise information and organise that information using a spiral dynamics model. It is a very hard problem and that particular AI should be trained a lot to get more and more accurate, and the other problem is that sometimes i feel like the spiral dynamics model is not too tangible (depending on the context), so it would be very hard to make it tangible for the computer.

One good thing with machine learning is that you don't necessarily need to make something super tangible (for example if you make an algorithm you need to put everything in the computer mouth because we know that nothing is trivial to it), however most machine learning models are used this way: This going to be framed very simply, (but of course a lot of nuance here that i don't mention): transform your data in a numerical format organise it feed it to the machine, decide how many neurons you want to use and how many layers, and then here comes one of the hard part: making the output well, making it tangible, so the AI knows exactly what it needs to optimise for.

The very cool stuff is that even if you don't know and can't necessarily see the order, if you have a lot of data(lot of input and output data), then the AI depending on how advanced it is, it will be able to recognize an order between the input and the output, and hopefully the more it is trained the better it gets at it (sometimes it produces worse results, depending  on optimization functions and stuff). So in theory if i were to collect and organise a lot of data, (websites and information using the spiral dynamics model), then if i were to feed that information to a trained AI it would be able to organise those websites and information and put those into and organised structure like a spiral dynamics model with x level of accuracy.

 

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

Got the link to the forum, took a quick peek, and saw some of my favorite members there. I'm signing up, but I'm staying here too.

[Gesundheit2]

What Is Not Allowed On This Forum

Recruiting member for chat-groups outside the forum.

-- From the other forum's guidelines. LMAO!

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

Just got back from the hospital, it was raining, I got all wet.

Bro asked me to go up to the roof and check the water storage, did that.

Then on the way down I saw my cousin and her little baby daughter, 2 years old or something. I held her in my hands, lift her up the ground then made her stand on my thighs, best feeling in the world. I asked her what her name is, she sweetly mumbled Fatima. How cute and innocent!! Then I carried her up the stairs and delivered her to her grandma's.I will have as many kids as possible.

Edited March 24, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[zurew]

One final advice for your coding journey.

The advice would be to make your own projects. 

Start from scratch and learn the needed technology,knowledge, tricks, and piece of code that you need to make your little project happen. Thats the ultimate learning, when you can put your knowledge into real practice, you struggle, you need to research, fail and try and fail and try. Thats how real projects are actually bult. If you will have a job in coding in the future, you will be doing something similar. 

If you are a beginner, you should choose smaller projects like building a tic-tac-toe game. There are a lot of other small project ideas, you pick one and you try to solve it yourself. If you really really struggle you may peek and see part of the solution and then try to finish your project.

By building your own projects:

• you will really understand how coding works in practice,
• you will learn how to translate your idea into code,
• you will learn how to research for solutions or part of the solution,
• you will find a lot of error and that way you will realise what different kind of errors can mean and how to solve them
• your brain will have a lot more connection to coding, you will have a tangible experience, what different kind of coding concepts actually mean.
• You can build your own portfolio, which can be very beneficial when you apply for jobs
• You will learn a lot of skills through struggling (like being able to find effectively a soultion, researching, getting to know your IDE better, handling errors more effectively, learning debugging, and learning about the most common bugs, and learning about where to search for the bugs in your code)  
• You can reuse your own code (you will know exactly all the parts of your previous projects and you will be able to use parts of it for other projects or problems)

 

Good luck!

[Gesundheit2]

12 hours ago, zurew said:

One final advice for your coding journey.

The advice would be to make your own projects.

Start from scratch and learn the needed technology,knowledge, tricks, and piece of code that you need to make your little project happen. Thats the ultimate learning, when you can put your knowledge into real practice, you struggle, you need to research, fail and try and fail and try. Thats how real projects are actually bult. If you will have a job in coding in the future, you will be doing something similar. 

Thank you, I really appreciate that you took the time to write this post. And yeah, I agree with you that I probably need more practice.

But I'm kind of facing a handful of logistic problems that are slowing me down that I try to tell myself are not a big deal. For example, I have other commitments at the moment (mainly medical school and family obligations) so I'm not fully dedicated to programming. I also don't have access to my PC/internet all the time, as there are certain environmental limitations that are imposed on me because of where I live (shortage of electricity and internet). As well, winter was really cold this year and I had to endure it without any heating whatsoever, blankets are all I have, and I can't work from underneath a blanket. Those are the main obstacles that I'm facing right now, and even though I started learning web development one year ago, in real time (practice) I think it equals 3 or less months in better circumstances.

Quote

If you are a beginner, you should choose smaller projects like building a tic-tac-toe game. There are a lot of other small project ideas, you pick one and you try to solve it yourself. If you really really struggle you may peek and see part of the solution and then try to finish your project.

I've already made a number of projects with the help of an instructor, but nothing on my own yet. Here are two of them:

Guess My Number
Pig Game

Quote

By building your own projects:

• you will really understand how coding works in practice,
• you will learn how to translate your idea into code,
• you will learn how to research for solutions or part of the solution,
• you will find a lot of error and that way you will realise what different kind of errors can mean and how to solve them
• your brain will have a lot more connection to coding, you will have a tangible experience, what different kind of coding concepts actually mean.
• You can build your own portfolio, which can be very beneficial when you apply for jobs
• You will learn a lot of skills through struggling (like being able to find effectively a soultion, researching, getting to know your IDE better, handling errors more effectively, learning debugging, and learning about the most common bugs, and learning about where to search for the bugs in your code)  
• You can reuse your own code (you will know exactly all the parts of your previous projects and you will be able to use parts of it for other projects or problems)

 

Good luck!

I am noticing these effects as I'm practicing more. I think all I need is time.

[Gesundheit2]

Nobody's perfect, but some people are better than others.

Edited March 29, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

I've always been the first to criticize Leo, and still am. But my respect for him is only ever increasing.

Edited March 29, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

There's no point in being omniscient unless you're omnipotent.

Theory = Garbage.

[Gesundheit2]

I've written a long post about my spiritual journey throughout the last decade, but it was gone because I lost internet connection right when I pressed submit.

Long story short, fuck God.

[Gesundheit2]

There's something sobering about owning one's ego instead of throwing it into the shadow.