Panic of death while sleeping. Need help

[Breakingthewall]

14 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

feels like physical death from the perspective of the ego. The trick to avoiding that trap is to directly see how it's only from the perspective of the ego, but it requires being brutally honest with yourself.

That is. It's hard to loose everything that you know

[Breakingthewall]

13 minutes ago, RedLine said:

But I don´t have enoughts balls haha

If you know how big are the balls that you need for that, you know a lot. I haven't that balls neither, but it's no choice. The deconstruction is calling you since you were 16, sure at the end you re going to accept

Edited January 1, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[Danioover9000]

@RedLine

   Another great meditation is a mindfulness practice on body awareness, specifically while you're lying down. Pretend you are counting sheep, but instead of counting sheep, you count each part of your body that is in contact with something, and later at some point put mindfulness on how you breathe, each inhale, exhale, pauses in between, and back to counting spots on your body, except now your being mindful of external pressures on your skin, or the different temp on your skin, and back to breathing, and now be mindful of your thinking. This back and forth of you applying awareness to different areas of your mind/body will help tremendously with your sleep.

 

[Nahm]

37 minutes ago, RedLine said:

Can you specify how can I inspect direct experience while I am sleeping and that happens to me?

Think of it like running out of gas. The relevant time to inspect is not while the engine is shutting off. 

The belief does not align with the true nature, the truth, what’s actual, and is affecting your sleep and your family. I’m on your side man. I’ve no interest in being right, or pretending you can inspect in your sleep. 

[RedLine]

26 minutes ago, Nahm said:

Think of it like running out of gas. The relevant time to inspect is not while the engine is shutting off. 

The belief does not align with the true nature, the truth, what’s actual, and is affecting your sleep and your family. I’m on your side man. I’ve no interest in being right, or pretending you can inspect in your sleep. 

I don't doubt your good intentions. It is just that that thought vs present moment discourage doesn't make much sense for me in many occasions. Thank you for your answers anyway.

Edited January 2, 2021 by RedLine

[abrakamowse]

@RedLine that exactly happened to me. I’ll write more about it later!!!

[Nahm]

1 hour ago, RedLine said:

I don't doubt your good intentions. It is just that that thought vs present moment discourage doesn't make much sense for me in many occasions. Thank you for your answers anyway.

 For the sake of communication & clarity....not sure what is meant by ‘thought vs present moment discourage’.

[integral]

Used to have night terrors as a child, would wake up in a confused state and start sprinting through the house, while yelling with no control of body or actions, my parents would have to restrain me and hold me down to the bed, this would last about an hour until my sanity returned. 

After many years of this, we eventually figured out that i was having a bad reaction to dairy products and eating it at night would trigger stressed sleep that can then escalate into the night terrors. 

Edited January 2, 2021 by integral

[abrakamowse]

That happened to me too @RedLine but I really didn't have any idea why and what was happening. I thought I was crazy or losing my mind.

I think @Nahm what is saying is very on point. You have that feeling that you are going to die because you believe you are an individual being who can die.

If you work on that during the day, probably when you are half asleep or sleeping and that happens you will be able to surrender or let go. Because what it causes the feeling that you are dying and it scares you is the belief behind it. 

All feelings come from beliefs. The belief is first, then you feel like you are scared or whatever you feel.

I really wanted to share my experience but I really didn't go completely into it, I know is scary, but what I am telling you is what I think it can make you (or me) go through it and reach enlightenment. The experience didn't happen to me again I don't know why, but I am trying to align my belief to be ready for that moment of total surrender.

Not sure if this helps, I think you may listen/pay attention to what @Nahm is saying.

Edited January 2, 2021 by abrakamowse

[cetus]

2 hours ago, abrakamowse said:

The experience didn't happen to me again I don't know why, but I am trying to align my belief to be ready for that moment of total surrender.

One stands at the gateless gate and asks "Who is the gatekeeper?"

-just a contemplation

 

[Armand]

14 hours ago, RedLine said:

I am 27 and it happens to me since when I was a teenager. It happens once per month on average; sometimes more, sometimes less. It's the most horrible thing I can experience. It only lasts a couple of seconds, I think that if it lasted longer I would pass out or have a heart attack, I don't think I could bear that suffering.

 

I will describe it below:

 

It occurs always 45 minutes after I have fallen asleep. I guess I am in a point between daydreaming and deep sleep and my mind is very very clear. I suddenly realize that I am going to die someday, that there is no a single change I can´t avoid death; I am gonna die and all "my world" is gonna dissapear. I mean, I can think about the death during the day and nothing happens, it is just a though, but this time I 100% realize it. Then I wake up screaming like fucking crazy (it is a horrible scream, very high pitched and with a high volume) and shaking, I can´t controll it. This experience last 1-3 seconds but it is the most horrible thing you can imagine. What make it so scary is that it is fucking real.

 

I am not so concerned about the experience itself, because it only lasts a couple of seconds, but these things worry me:

 I wake up and scare my whole family and all the neighbors on my block with the scream. There are children who are scared and cry in the apartment below. I feel really bad about this...

 

Maybe one day when I get an outbreak of these I could have a heart attack, because I go from being calm to being in a panic mode like lightning.

 

 

 

You are not alone I do this at times as a fully grown man. It's scary as hell when you realize all this will go away and the pain of death is something I have feared the most. I'm terrified to die when I have a sudden dream death situation arise right as I'm waking up. The pain I feel is all too real and so is the experience. 

I try not to think about it but oh man.. Those minutes before I'm fully awake I tend to scream and kick for my life. It's not something you should focus on too much after it happens and you're back to normal or you'll go into a spiral of trauma. Getting out of Rem sleep messes with people differently.

Yes! It's scary and you're allowed to react as such. Death is scary but we can all hope for a better life after instead of thinking we will just fade into existence. Our consciousness is too complex to end and go back to the darkness we had at the beginning. Our physical bodies that harbor pain will no longer be of use to us.

[Corpus]

On hearing such symptoms, a neurologist would consider RBD (REM Sleep Behavioural Disorder) and would seek more details of the history, including from those around the sufferer. Spirituality is one perspective; other more practical ones (as applied to this case) also exist. If further history-taking suggested RBD then a PSG (polysomnograph) with EEG and surface-EMG would be useful, +/- other tests. 

 

Horses for courses as an aphorism springs to mind.

[Breakingthewall]

3 hours ago, NondualesStudium said:

. and Human Adulthood?

13 hours ago, RedLine said:

 

What do you mean? Are you familiar with terms like respect, or open minded? Maybe you should learn them. I exposed those experiences to help and to share. Of course I know that some people could ridicule them...that's life. 

Edited January 2, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[abrakamowse]

8 hours ago, cetus said:

One stands at the gateless gate and asks "Who is the gatekeeper?"

-just a contemplation

 

Exactly! Thanks @cetus ? ?

[snowyowl]

I saw a Jim Newman video recently (can't remember which one) where he does his customary hand wave to indicate the here & now, and says "this is death already" as there is no-one here to experience the states of life & death, it's just pure appearance. I find Jim's work challenging but this quote is surprisingly comforting to me. The distinction between life and death is an illusion (in theory, but I'm not there yet!). 

Edited January 2, 2021 by snowyowl

[Breakingthewall]

@NondualesStudium  hah I misunderstood you sorry to be so ill thinker. My English is far to be good. I will see that video, and explore Jed McKenna, I never read him. thank you! 

Edit: Im looking for those books of McKenna, do you remember the titles where he talk about those concepts?

Edited January 2, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[abrakamowse]

3 minutes ago, NondualesStudium said:

No, I didn't mean to ridicule you, of course!

Jed McKenna uses these terms to describe more or less what you experience: Truth Realization (or "Untruth Unrealization" as he calls it) is horrible, devastating, discovering the truth of No-Self and Emptiness. Human Adulthood refers to God Consciousness, a blissful feeling of unity.

His books are excellent "tools" to explore them.

 

I need to read those books again. 
I had both experiences. 
Thanks!

12 minutes ago, snowyowl said:

I saw a Jim Newman video recently (can't remember which one) where he does his customary hand wave to indicate the here & now, and says "this is death already" as there is no-one here to experience the states of life & death, it's just pure appearance. I find Jim's work challenging but this quote is surprisingly comforting to me. The distinction between life and death is an illusion (in theory, but I'm not there yet!). 

That’s great. I will check his work.

?

[Bodhitree]

@RedLine I think a problem that is this persistent is a clear sign that it’s an important issue to you subconsciously and energetically. You may find some blockages in your body energy, or something in your sleeping self which makes it walk the same unusual path.

I would start with some meditations on the subject of death, just to get used to it without the existential baggage. Some years ago I was in India, and I had rented a little apartment which looked over the river. It was also right next to the burning ghats, the local place for cremating the dead. So for the weeks that I stayed there, every so often there would be little gatherings next door and there would be the smell and smoke of a burning body drifting over. You get used to it. Death there is very different from death here, it’s more normal, more accepted, more an every day part of life.

I’ve never found it that useful to look annihilation in the face. The existential dread of ceasing-to-be holds few terrors once you start to recognise death as the dewdrop slipping off the lotus leaf to become one with the ocean. But that is an understanding that doesn’t arrive all at once, it is a series of relaxing out-breaths as you realise there is nothing to be afraid of. Things are exactly as they are supposed to be, and they couldn’t be any other way.

[Nahm]

On 1/1/2021 at 7:48 PM, RedLine said:

I don't doubt your good intentions. It is just that that thought vs present moment discourage doesn't make much sense for me in many occasions. Thank you for your answers anyway.

Does ‘makes sense’ mean ‘aligns with what I already believe / know’...or ‘feels great’? 

[zeroISinfinity]

Love feels great.