Ego is ??? your Foe

[Nahm]

@Tim R

Point in any direction. 

[seeking_brilliance]

Indivisible... 

[Nahm]

The Enlightened One. 

[Tim R]

32 minutes ago, Nahm said:

@Tim R

Point in any direction. 

Smells like Zen

[xxxx]

56 minutes ago, Tim R said:

But you can alleviate narcissism in general, that's what I meant

Yes.

There’s always a story. What makes a person narcissistic in the first place? I choose to disagree that some people are just ‘born evil’ and are ‘not capable’ of love - a lot of factors play into the becoming of a person. I choose to believe that they do not ‘lack’ love, but that they do not have proper understanding of how true, God’s love works. 

Of course, everyone is a little bit narcissistic, but this general narcissism is not the one in question here.

Narcissists usually feel unworthy at their core, albeit their sense of grandeur - one needs to take an effort in understanding what their hidden shame is - this can help with them getting aware of who they are. Not accusing why they are doing some thing in the most direct sense, but by using other subtle methods to put a point across. 

Also, the narcissistic person shouldn’t view you as a ‘weak empath’ - they should view the other person as someone whose emotions are their strength, and one who will not fall prey to their ploy. That makes a huge difference.

Now, I am not trying to tell that this always works - and at least not in the case of serial killers, etc. - some have passed to the point of an almost, next to impossible recovery.

If one is aware that they are dealing with a narcissist (who is not of the super violent kind), they need to make a choice if they wish to be a part of their healing process or not. It’s a very difficult task, and not everyone is going to be able to deal with the tumultuous aspect of it. 

Nevertheless, I have a belief that people can change - one never knows what that one catalyst might be.

There are children, going through a difficult childhood - on the verge of losing their beautiful sense of identity. I genuinely believe that it is imperative that children know what true love is - you have no idea the positive impact love can have on their lives. 

Healing adult narcissism is a very difficult task, but we can, in our little capacities, try to stop that within children - that is one way to help alleviate narcissism before it grows.

Children are the best learners, teach them well.

 

Edited December 25, 2020 by xxxx

[SamC]

2 hours ago, Gesundheit said:

It's not black or white. That may be true for you as a healthy individual, but not for an individual with NPD.  If you love/accept that narcissist, you will enable evil. Not that that's bad in the ultimate sense, but in "our ordinary human equality rights" sense. A narcissist does not understand things like love or transcendence. In fact, they use these concepts to use others and further push their greedy agendas. If a normal human ego can be satisfied easily, a narcissist's ego doesn't. Thus all the problems of humanity. Now, of course, narcissists won't like me saying this truth, and brainwashed people won't like it either. But yeah, it is what it is. Some people are simply evil, and you can't sugar-coat it.

@Gesundheit @Tim R

1: When you enable a narcissist you're doing it out of fear and thorugh being manipulated ( Which has happend cause they have found what your fears and triggers are). If you were to act out of love in this situation, you would stay the fuck away from this person

2: Let's take your example, if one were to be abused by a narcissist..  what are some ways to handle the situation.

You can either A:

Hate the narcissist, hate yourself for falling for the narcissist, hate yourself for hating the narcissist and as a result become bitter for the rest of your life. That's a choice, and there is nothing wrong with that choice, the only question is if that's the thing you want moving forward. ( do you see how this will just create more suffering, ego and evil?)

Or B

Allow yourself to feel all of your different emotions of hate e.ct towards yourself and that person and love, accept and honor your/ that experience. Loving something = acceptance of everything just as it is, including your ego's view of the experience. This alternative doesn't include, wanting to enable a narcissist - only accepting your feelings and behaviors as they are.

Now, ask yourself if you were to choose, which one is the " best" way to go about managing this problem with an abusing narcissists? Is the answer moving forward, honoring/ accepting your feelings, taking steps toheal and develop yoursellf or is it hating those feelings? The only way to counter hate is with love, so when you hate something, whatever it is.. love that you hate it. Meet your ego with love and acceptance. "Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses"

7 hours ago, Tim R said:

 

"We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses."

 

 

Edited December 25, 2020 by SamC

[Breakingthewall]

Maybe you shouldn't take him as an enemy but I want to get rid of him. Sometimes I am silent, a perfect hole, I think I have it, but the voices are always lurking. all the voices of each person that I have met, each opinion, judgment, assessment, each relationship, insecurity, boast ... begin to weave their fabric, and the void disappears. I don't know how to get rid of them, it seems impossible. They are part of me, I have them attached. Sometimes it seems like a terrible curse, that voice that never stops, but usually they are there, in the background, they do not bother so much. I see that you completely renounce all opinion, judgment, assessment, future perspective, control. a total resignation and so they will be silent. What is not possible is to wait for them to shut up but keeping my "I", because it happens that my I are the voices. To get really free of the ego is necessary. I have to tell myself more. But who says that is the ego. What a hell

[hyruga]

You cannot get rid of ego. Ego is constructed there to protect you from danger. For example, if you do sky diving, your ego will be there to tell you not to. Or if you swim at open sea without much training, your ego will stop you.

To get rid of your ego is like getting rid of your whole neo-cortex so that you no longer process any thoughts and just behave like most animals.

[BlackMaze]

@hyruga i believe that instinct and ego are 2 separate things. The most enlightened person in the world that completely transcended the ego will still feel that fear. Most animals can't detach from the fear and observe it. Or maybe they can who knows

Maybe there is an enlightened zebra out there

Edited December 26, 2020 by BlackMaze