I am reborn? This is, this is me?

[Manusia]

Today I feel very different from the previous days in my entire life. I almost never feel this way. This is weird. I feel like I've never been me before. Well it's weird, I done some work, yeah the story is very long and complicated. Before this day I can't even feel my energy for the rest of my life. I always absorbing another people energy and act like its my energy, Weird you know? Well some shaman say I have quite a strange ability in this reality. They say I have the supranatural power, but I also don't know what they are saying because the language is very vague about this. One of the shaman said that on my right hand there was a kind of line that represented a power, which was the same line as him.

But with this ability I still don't know how to use it. I have lots of suffering, lot of mental and emotional damage from this. I didnt want to write that now.

This shaman says my energy always waste. I've never been me. The voice that speaks in my head IS NOT ME! what the fucking happened to me? !! That's what I said to myself the first time I was awakened by the shaman, and became myself for the first time in my life, at the age of 21. I cried sadly mixed with happiness. After that awakening day,  I returned to my baseline, struggle to find where 'my voice', struggle to find where is my energy.

Today, consciously without anyone's help, the voices of energy that are not me, are not in my head anymore. It was like removing a helmet from concrete. I am very grateful. I am very grateful. I feel like, reborn. This is me, yes me.

[Manusia]

Wow. I can think clearly without any doubt in my head! I can think clearly, speak clearly, choose without worry. Like there is some swift in my awareness. Yes I feel I can regressing back to my old. But now im feeling amazing.